"In my heart, there is room only for a friend, and it was reserved for you, dear Miss Stonebridge. "
A few hours had already passed since Beth left Stonebridge's house and went in search of Eva, but till now she couldn't find any trace of where she could be.
She only remembers the carriage with which Eva had left and that they took North through the forest road. Nothing more. She had no idea about where they were going or which was their final destination.
Right after exiting the Immaje, Beth stood for a while and looked around. The nature in October seemed so alluring, even if it was loaded with too many raindrops and it was getting cold, even too cold for this end of the month, considering that it was only the middle of the fall.
That dark-green-yellow, spread all over the field and through the branches of the trees, was splendid. Here and there, could be seen the black ground, devoid of the silky coat of grass as if an unknown painter had dropped an inkwell over the fresh painting of nature, enlivened by a bright green, an autumn green. And this splendor made Beth doubt her decision, for a few moments only, while her glance was caught by the surroundings.
Awakened from her daydream, Beth saw in the distance, approaching her from the left, a merchant’s cart. She stared at that unwelcome guest who had dared to disturb her loneliness and unwittingly her forehead furrowed, her eyes narrowed and her lips moved in a kind of bitter temblor as if she was a little puppy ready to attack the one who was trying to bother him. But soon she calmed down, took a deep breath and proud, turned her back at the cart, and went before it.
The road was difficult because of the rain that poured all night long. The blades of grass were slippery and the wet earth was easily catching the foot, like in a moving trap, making those who were fighting to walk above it to be similar to a robot.
But it didn’t discourage Beth, who was convinced to find Miss Stonebridge at all costs.
“Go on a long journey?” talked the merchant to Beth.
“You can say so,” simply answered Beth without looking at him.
“You can go with me if you want. I have room for one more. The road is slippery and walking on foot will take you a lot of days till you will reach the nearest village”.
It made sense what the merchant was saying. The next village was almost 4 km from there and walking on foot till there, on such a road, it would take you instead of 2 hours at least 5. She wasn’t ready for such a road. Even if she lived in the countryside, she had not done physical work, at least not so much to be able to walk long distances, and she needs all the force she has for searching Miss Eva and not to waste it only on walking. So, Beth climbed in the merchant’s cart, sitting on a small snag, that served as a chair.
The merchant pulled the reins and the two grey horses moved away. He was a man about 60, with a grey beard and hair, wearing enough clothes to not feel the frost of a late fall. He had peasant shoes in his feet- coarse on the outside and not so pleasant to look at, but Beth could see that they were lined with sheep's fur on the inside, keeping the feet warm on long cold nights. On his head, he had a hat, also lined with fur, but this time Beth couldn’t understand what kind of fur it was. She was wondering between being the fur of a fox or of a bunny, but soon she gave up to the idea of guessing and she looked around, at nature, because she considered it more interesting to watch it than at the skin of a dead animal.
“Are you going to visit a dear person or is it just for business?” talked the merchant this time while she pulled the reins once again forcing the horses to take the road through the forest - the same road that took Albert’s carriage when he and Miss Davis came after Eva to Immaje.
“I’m not going to visit anybody. I’m just looking for someone”, answered Beth and a sorrowful tear showed up at the corner of her right eye.
“To look for? Why? Is that person missing?” continued the merchant with his little interrogation.
“No. She just left” simply answered Beth and looked in front of her. At the gallop of the horses, the trees left behind seemed to run in the opposite direction, just like the road and this made Beth feel that she’s leaving behind not only her hometown, the places she learned to love in her short time, but she was leaving a big part of her soul there, with the uncertainty creeping into her heart as she didn’t know if she will come back here one day or this was the last time, she was seeing these beloved surroundings.
“If someone is missing it can be only because of two reasons: he can’t come back because of somebody or because he didn’t want it. You should ask yourself first which of these two reasons motivate your friend to not return to you and when you will find it out you will know if it is worthy to look for him or better to live your life. Those who don’t want to be found will never be found, no matter what you will do”, said the merchant with a neutral voice and then he started to slowly whisper a kind of personal melody, something that was just born in his head and he wanted to let him flow away. And he was right: he hadn’t the slightest reason to be preoccupied because of somebody that he had never met before. He only said it, like the advice of an old man for a young girl, who lived so little time in this world and she didn’t know how things are going on here. But his words had touched Beth’s heart and she started to think about it.
She didn’t know where Miss Stonebridge had left and she also didn’t know why she didn’t say goodbye to Beth. If she had said goodbye to her, if she had promised that she would return one day, Beth would have waited for her. But so, when she doesn’t know anything about if Eva is ok or if she is in danger if she misses her or she is happy, how could Beth just stay and wait? It was beyond her power.
It was half-past one o'clock in the afternoon when they got to Brighton. The merchant stopped the horses in the center of the town and after saying goodbye and thanks to him, Beth went north. She didn’t know why she went in that direction, but something in her heart told her she had to walk that way and she just walked so.
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Soon after, she met Brian and she understood that she had to meet him that day and to tell him about Eva’s departure. She wanted to make him feel sorrow, but she didn’t know why. She was aware that he hadn’t the slightest guilt because Eva left Immaje, but somehow Beth felt released after talking to him. In her big, innocent heart, she had felt that he had some interest in Miss Stonebridge and if he knew that she was gone he would look for her, and this way Beth will find her too. He is rich, he has power and money to find her, while Beth is just a simple servant, a dumb one because she didn’t know to read a map, she didn’t know where to go. She could write a letter to Eva, asking her about her location, how suggested the merchant, but Beth couldn’t write and she also didn’t know where to send that letter and she just cried.
Crouched on a street corner, with the carriages passing at full speed next to her, with people walking around and looking at her as if they saw a ghost, Beth stayed like this for a long time and cried a lot.
It was already dusk when she stopped crying and looked around. Even though it was almost dusky, the streets were crowded with people and this was something surprising for a country girl. In Immaje, right after the sunset, the people enter their houses and prepare for sleep, but in the big cities, it is different. The cities awake at dusk. Their soul becomes vivid at the sunset and people, rich people, come back to life when the night is still young because now they are going to the theater, they are going to visit each other, they are keeping a social life, something that was so weird and so unknown for Beth.
“Stand aside!” yelled at her a teamster and Beth barely stepped away when a carriage passed beside her at full speed. It scared her and breathing fast, Beth ran away.
In front of her, a great crowd of people was coming, making her run even more difficult. Squeezing hard to her chest the bundle with her few personal things, afraid not to lose it, Beth looked around with frightened eyes at all those glances that were flashing her. She couldn’t understand why they are chasing her, why they watch after her all over and why they whisper at her, but it was only in her imagination. Nobody was chasing her. The townspeople were just curious about that wild deer that was running without a final destination, and they were whispering while wondering if she is sain if she needs help or something.
Suddenly a hand grabbed her arm and pulling her toward him, a boy forced her to follow him. They walked around for about half an hour, through dark, narrow streets, where there were only a few people till they got to a hidden park with only one bench under a big and rotated Maple tree. Then the boy released her arm and while sitting down on the bench he yawned.
Beth continued to stand and squeeze the bundle. Around this little park were a few houses only, with impressive buildings, with sculptures of lions at their entrance, but the windows were blind and it seemed to be abandoned.
“Will you stay all night like this? Like a dumb? And squeezing that unimportant bundle at your chest as if it is something very important?”, said the boy while continuing to stare at Beth and yawning again and again. Beth could even notice in his glance a trace of boredom and this was something that she didn’t like at him. As she didn’t like the clothes he was wearing, that's why she started to analyze him from his head.
He was a boy about 16, not very tall, skinny, and dirty as if he had not ever been acquainted with water, but despite his unclean appearance, there wasn't any smell coming from him. His eyes were small, round, and dark, similar to the eyes of a mouse, quite a lace, and always in movement. His face was also round, small, and a roman nose made him seem to be quite cute. His garment was shabby, dirty and here and there Beth could see traces of old fights on it. And they were also highlighted by the pair of shoes he was wearing: definitely too big for him, probably two or three sizes more than he was wearing, and from different pairs.
“You aren’t from here, don’t you?” said this time the boy while looking at the manner Beth was eyeing him. “You never saw a beggar, didn't you?” continued him.
“And it seems that you like fights, a lot, don’t you?” retorted Beth while her tone gained some firmness. “You can deny it if you want, but you can’t fool me. Your … your appearance is telling me everything about it,” continued her to provoke the boy, asking him to tell the truth.
“I won’t deny it,” he said. “When you are living the life, I am living it’s impossible not to fight. It’s in your bones”.
“In your bones? Why so?”
“Because nobody gives a damn penny to you and if you don’t fight, then you don’t eat and if you don’t eat then you won’t survive. That simple. You will get used to it. Soon”. A short silence was between them and this silence made the boy be more confident with Beth soon his ready-to-attack position was gone and he looked into Beth’s eyes, somehow in a protective way.
“I can teach you if you want,” continued him.
“To teach me? What?” asked Beth and taking a few steps toward him she also sat on the bench. “I don’t need to be taught something. I just need to find Miss Stonebridge”.
“And who is she? Your mistress?” asked this time the boy while staring at the bundle.
“She is my friend. Miss Stonebridge is my friend”, answered Beth and she squeezed the bundle even more to her chest. She did this instinctively because she was looking this way for support and not because she noticed the boy’s glance, which had soon in it a kind of blink with pilferage trace.
“And you have no idea about where she can be, don’t you?
“Yes. I don’t know it, but I have the intention to find it and soon” answered Beth with conviction. “She can’t be too far. I know she couldn’t abandon me forever. If I look for her, I’ll find her, and then we will be together again”.
The boy slapped his forehead with his palm while nodding. “From what I see you are really dumb, girl. She left you and ran away looking for a better life, while you are dreaming about the impossible. Wake up, girl. This world is not pink. It has traces of black on it and if you aren’t careful, it will swallow you completely”.
His remark made Beth get angry. She suddenly stood up and giving him the bad eye, she yelled: “if you don’t know anything about trust then it would be better to keep silent. Miss Stonebridge is not like you. She’s kind and she loves me. She was always preoccupied with me and when I was sick, she took care of me, and only because of this I should be thankful to her. Even if only for this, I'll never stop searching for her. She’s my friend. My only friend. I doubt a beggar knows anything about friendship”.
After saying these words, Beth turned her back to him and went away. She didn’t know where they were or where she should go, but she decided just to walk. If she walks in a straight direction, she will find something, some warm place where to spend the night, only that night, because tomorrow she will continue her adventure and she will find Miss Stonebridge for sure.
The boy’s hand again grabbed her arm and without looking at her he said. “Just follow me. Even if you are dumb, I can’t leave you alone in this town. It will crush on you for sure if you are alone and I’m Stan, by the way. Stan, the beggar”.
She didn’t know this boy, but something inside her told Beth to trust him and to follow him. Even though he is dirty and he is a beggar, he is the first person in this big world who stretched his hand to help her and this was something that Beth appreciated always. This was something that made her be faithful for eternity.