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20 Trauma Trumps Tiredness

I collapsed bonelessly to the ground.

“I suppose it is impressive that you did not scream,” Valentine muttered dismissively.

That pissed me off.

I didn’t bother responding, appreciating the cold ground. Appreciating my shaking breathing. My body was still, eyes still producing tears. Sleep tugged at me, but fear kept me from falling asleep.

Would I dream of that nightmare? Would the pain return?

I focused on using all of my willpower to stay awake. No. No, I would get up, and I would be fine, and I would-I would-I don’t know, study for the entrance exam or something.

Valentine sighed, “That was quite impressive. Had you already taken the exams, I would have loved to see you take advantage of the situation.”

What the fuck was that then?

Fuck you! I snapped, but my breathing didn’t comply, the words mouthed. My rage overcame my fear, though, replacing it and using it as fuel. I took a deep breath, shifting.

Slowly, I managed to get my fingers to twitch. It wasn’t enough. I took a deeper breath, it shuddering out as I tried again.

And again. And again.

“You’re still awake?” Valentine asked incredulously.

Pathetic. Useless.

I growled at the thoughts swarming in my head. The anger that pushed me into another world to punch someone in the face pushed me to my feet.

My mind was only full of Valentine’s stupid face getting my fist put into it. I glowered, even more fear being added to my fire of rage as I met his gaze.

His eyes reflected a blood red light. Maybe I was just seeing red though. And I was, the entire world seemed tinted in red despite the room having been cleaned of blood.

I took a single step forward, then I sprinted forward. Valentine looked surprised, staggering back.

“Wh-well,” Valentine breathed, eyes glittering and expression mad with interest.

A glowing magic circle appeared in front of him.

My fist broke through it, coated in the blood red energy. Valentine’s entire body twisted to the side as my fist slammed into his jaw. He collapsed to the ground.

I breathed heavily. Blood dripped down from Valentine’s face.

“Fuck… you…” I managed, collapsing bonelessly to the ground.

My anger dissipated. I tried reaching out with my magic, but found I couldn’t. More tears fell from my eyes. I laid on the ground, staring at Valentine.

“How violent,” Valentine said distantly, blue eyes glassy as they stared down at his blood, “To think you would get angry enough to not only stay awake, but to manifest aura. What an impressive feat. Maybe claims of your prodigal nature aren’t unfounded.”

“Fuck you,” I breathed, unable to do much more.

A sort of satisfaction filled me, the rage that brought me here returning with a vengeance. My chest was heaving, sweat covering me at my actions. If I could continue to punch bastards in the face using this body, it was as good as mine.

Sorry, Persephone, but fuck you too, you fucking bitch.

Red flickered in the corners of my vision, trails of energy darker than blood still wafting around me like the smoke of an incense.

More tears fell from my eyes as I tried healing Valentine again. A… circle…

Right?

Yeah.

Valentine swallowed, eyes blinking rapidly as he tried focusing his gaze. He stared down at the tooth that had been knocked from his mouth. A large cut went through his cheek into his mouth, blood pouring from the skin.

Rage swirled within me, but I wanted to heal him more than I wanted to hurt him.

Two-pi-one.

3.14.

The man’s purple hair was falling over his shoulder and brushing the ground from his half-risen position.

He reached up, fingers tracing his wound.

“To think you’d be angry enough to break through my magic with your aura.”

He swallowed roughly again, his breathing growing ragged. Glossy eyes looked at his fingers, coated red.

Heal. Circle. Area… 3.14 inches squared. Circumference 6.28 inches.

My magic circle flickered to life. Blue eyes turned, focusing on me with a very odd look. Soon his cheek was healed, his teeth taking slightly longer. I struggled to remember how bones worked.

“And you’re able to cast magic so soon after… Oh,” Valentine cried, entire body shaking as he reached out.

His entire body shook, a very wide and unhinged grin overtaking his face. Valentine’s eyes glittered, wide with gleeful insanity.

His arms wrapped tightly around me. His breathing was shaking and very heavy, his head tucked into the crook of my neck.

“I’ve never,” Valentine managed breathily, laughing, “I’ve never met someone so-so, oh,” He moaned out, his words becoming a joyful hiss, “So impressive.”

His laughing turned into manic giggling, entire body shaking. His arms were very tight around me. I remained relaxed, struggling just to stay awake.

“I-I don’t know what to do with myself, ahahaha, oh,” The manic man laughed again, “Oh, wow. T-to think I would meet someone so special. Ah…”

Valentine was panting, entire body still shaking as he held me tightly to him. His chest shook harder than the rest as he laughed breathlessly.

“I just-I just-ah,” Valentine’s arms relaxed as he laughed giddily, “I want you. I want you so badly. I’m having you. You’re mine. Ahahahah, yes, I’m keeping you forever.”

Right, I realized quietly. I forgot about the “excitable Golden Retriever in a lab coat” side of him. The “mad” part of “mad scientist”.

Valentine’s tongue reached out, dragging along the skin of my neck, his teeth biting roughly into my flesh.

“I don’t know what I would do without you,” He said, tongue once more licking along my neck. He bit down on my shoulder, harder this time, “I don’t know what to do with myself now.”

I couldn’t move, eyes dragging themselves closed no matter how hard I tried keeping them open.

“Heheh, heheheh, ihihihihihi!” Valentine cackled madly, “Sl-sleep well. You must be quite tired. Oh. Oh.”

Valentine’s entire body shook with his suppressed laughter as he rested his forehead on my shoulder, clearly trying to catch his breath.

My mind faded.

I’m sorry—I really am—but I can’t stop.

When I woke up, I was groggy. I was still in the soulmancy room. Or at least I presumed so. Valentine was nowhere to be seen nor felt, the pitch black of the room not giving me much to work with.

Light was uneven triangles. That was a rectangle cut in half, essentially, right?

I just wanted a light. So that was… 10 by 4, divided by 2. 40… 20. Light appeared in my hand.

I swallowed, my throat hurting. My eyes burned, too. Slowly, I pushed myself up. I looked down at myself. Was I surprised by my lack of clothing?

No.

Did I feel violated?

I thought about it deeply, but I genuinely could not bring myself to care, no matter how hard I tried.

I doubted he’d done much besides bite me and feel me up, regardless. From how he was described, he’d never had sex before Aphrodite, and he was portrayed as very caring and considerate, in bed.

Regardless, I wasn’t worried.

He’d waited for Aphrodite to wake up before taking her in the books. Why wouldn’t he do that here?

… I suppose it was fortunate for me that he was busy enough to have to leave before I could get up.

Glancing around, I saw my dress not too far away. It looked like he’d thrown it aside.

Keeping the light on, I healed myself. Some of my wounds were still bleeding, so he presumably left recently. I walked to the opposite corner of the room my dress was on. Using my shower spell, I cleaned myself.

The water was scalding hot, steam billowing up in the cold room. I burnt my skin pink. Once I was content with the state of my cleanliness, the spell faded.

I wandered back over to my dress, evading some of the shackles hanging from the ceiling. I went to my dress and struggled to put it back on. Eventually I succeeded, leaving the room and looking around.

I’d forgotten how dangerous he was, momentarily. I’d forgotten he wasn’t actually my friend.

My light spell continued, but being able to see didn’t actually help me. I walked the same direction we usually walked, hesitating at the first cross-roads. Did we usually walk straight, here?

I hummed, looking around at the darkness, “Maybe I should have made the favor help me around the Academy during my stay here, or something.”

“I am—“

Squeaking, I jolted away, feet lifting from the air. I flailed, ending on my ass, my light spell flickering out.

“—amenable to the adjustment,” Desmond spoke as I freaked out, red eyes focused on me in the dark.

My heart hammered, entire body shaking with how hard it was beating. How hard it slammed against my ribcage. I reached up, grasping at my chest.

Jesus fuck, dude.

Taking a deep breath, I stood up, my light spell flaring to life.

“Is there a catch?” I wondered, a tremor in my voice that I ignored. My cheeks heated up at my fear, though.

Desmond smiled, very much seeming to enjoy my fear. The annoying bastard.

“No. I find you to be quite the interesting individual,” Desmond explained.

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I stared at him for a long moment. No… No… What did that mean, though? Was it code for I’ve been ordered to keep an eye on you? Was it code for I want more opportunities to scare the shit out of you? I hummed one note for a long few seconds, only stopping when I ran out of breath.

“Okay,” I agreed after another moment, gesturing, “Where’s the exit?”

“This way,” Desmond said, turning.

I jogged to catch up, reaching out and grabbing his hand. He led me through the tunnels in a confusing manner.

My two braincells were spinning uselessly in circles around each other, unable to keep up with the various turns we’d made. Were we going in circles? It felt like we were.

“What was the amendment you planned to make?” Desmond asked as we walked through the dark tunnels.

I glanced over, looking at him. He was staring at me, hardly paying attention to where we were going.

I looked back out at the darkness, explaining, “That I wouldn’t intentionally bring harm to you. Aside from that, It isn’t like I actually care whether you drink my blood or not. I only care that if I allowed it otherwise I’d be enslaved to you, from what I know. Humans regenerate blood pretty quickly, it isn’t like I need all of it, just enough to be able to get through my classes and stuff without being cold all the time.”

The noise of Desmond swallowing thickly made me look over. His gaze was on my neck. His gray hair was covering part of his face, but his hunger couldn’t be hidden.

“Then I accept,” He muttered.

Before I could say anything the air was shoved from my lungs. Teeth tore into my neck. A golden green energy wrapped around us, chaining Desmond to me. The glugging sounds of him swallowing my blood were kind of gross.

Circle, healing, 3.14, 6.28, I thought.

The healing spell I’d copied from Valentine appeared. Desmond hummed out a whine as his tongue dragged against my healed neck, the bite wound gone.

I continued healing myself until my lightheaded dizziness faded, blinking for a few moments.

“Master,” Desmond breathed, putting his forehead to mine.

I grimaced, pushing him away, “Yes. You’re mine now,” The lights surrounding us faded, “Anyway, let’s go.”

“Of course,” Desmond murmured.

I observed him for a long moment as we continued walking down the long, dark halls.

His gaze was on me, and he was smiling contently.

In the novel, he’d looked heartbroken and horrified once he came to his senses.

Why was there such a big difference? I gave him a confused look before going back to trying to figure out where we were.

The halls all looked the same, the basement dark, cold, and dreary. Maybe the engraved spells were different? Looking down, I saw that wasn’t the case.

How the hell was anyone supposed to get around in the basements?

I suppose that’s why Rowan, an upperclassman, had such a choke-hold on the students in the story. He used the basement’s confusing layout to trap individuals until they swore fealty to him or did other things for him.

Aph met him in the basements after getting lost. He’d asked for many things before ending at sexual favors in return for showing her the exit. She agreed, obviously. It wouldn’t have been an erotica if Aphrodite acted like a virgin.

Either give me your body or swear on your magic you’ll be mine.

It was a line that the majority of fans adored, though I found it kind of grating.

I was pretty happy when the king got killed in combat. I cheered, anyway. I was very sadistically happy when I scrolled through the comments reading of it, definitely.

Which country was Rowan going to be king of, again? Not the demon one, obviously. I had a feeling it was Rage, but that didn’t seem right.

His eyes were hot pink, so it would fit with the kingdom of Rage, right? Maybe he was a demon? He had blond hair, though, did any demons have blond hair? I didn’t think so…

No, wait, I was dumb. The Demon King was one of the last ones standing. Obviously he wasn’t replaced as king. And the country of Life was controlled by a governing body that wasn’t a monarchy. So it had to be Effort or Rage that he ended up in charge of, though he was currently third in line as the third prince of whichever country it was.

Anyway, Desmond would be alive now, because he wouldn’t go crazy in the Academy by starving himself to seem at the same level as other vampires. Also he couldn’t actually agree to be someone else’s when he was already mine, so one of my favorite characters was saved! Yay!

Fuck you, Orion, you dickfaced piece of shit angel. You can be overly righteous without being a cunt. You know that, right, you arrogant asshole? Wait. Couldn’t angels hear prayers if you knew their name?

… Ahhhh, I’m sure it was fine.

Despite the foreign feelings of awe, the fact that he was now real, and the weird feeling of partially knowing someone without ever having actually met, I was quite content. Desmond definitely would have been my favorite character had Kairos and Silas not survived longer than him.

I mean he was immortal. I still loved him, of course, but I adored capable, intelligent, and villainous individuals. While he was villainous and intelligent, his death left much to be desired.

My thoughts faded as I was brought to stairs. Ayy! Freedom! I released Desmond’s hand.

“Thanks,” I said, beginning my ascent.

I looked at him for a moment before turning to the stairs. He seemed just as content as before.

The stairs were difficult to get up, my legs exhausted. As I walked, I realized how insanely exhausted I was. Even though I’d healed myself twice now, my entire body was heavy, each step taking twice as much effort as it usually would have.

After what felt like a much longer trip than it was, I opened the door.

Eros was a very unique planet. One of its unique features was that the women to men ratio was 1:10. This caused a lot of reverse-harems to be made, and also meant that women typically were chosen over men when it came to important roles.

Which is why Persephone, the oldest daughter, was the one in line for the crown instead of Mercury, the oldest son.

It mostly was used as an excuse as to why Aph was pretty much the only female in the stories.

So I was quite surprised when I accidentally opened the door into some chick’s face.

She had pink hair and tears in her blue eyes.

“Oh, sorry,” I apologized.

My healing magic reached out and healed any hurts I may have given her. Another surprise was that she didn’t match any of the descriptions I’d read of. This was someone that I’d never read about in The Curse of Perfection.

So was the receptionist, I mused idly. And Elizabeth. And Monica. All of my maids, really.

But this chick was clearly beautiful, so it was wild that I’d never read of her. Not only that, but she had main character pink hair.

“Whoa! You know healing magic?” The girl asked, her eyes wide as she scrambled to her feet, stars in her eyes, “That’s so cool!”

I smiled gently at the kid who couldn’t have been much older than sixteen, “Thanks. Are you okay?”

“Yeah! I’m fine! Oh! My name is Lily! I come from Errant, in the kingdom of Life! What’s your name? Where are you from?” Lily asked innocently.

Her eyes scoured my form.

My smile grew as I shut the basement door behind me, “I am Persephone Esmer-Gold. I hail from the kingdom of Silver.”

“Oh, you have a last name!” Lily said, panicking, “I’m so sorry! I’m just a commoner, I shouldn’t be talking to someone like you—“

I scoffed, eyebrows raising, “It’s fine, Lily. All students in the Academy are equals. Feel free to call me Percy.”

Lily’s entire body was expressive, so she slumped as relief filled her, “Oh! That’s nice. I’m glad, I kind of thought you would be a bitch.”

I laughed, grinning, “I am, but not to random strangers, and typically not to nice people.”

Lily laughed too, “That’s great! Anyway, I have to get to class.”

“Oh! Yeah, okay, have a good one, Lily, see you around!” I agreed, stepping to the side so I wasn’t in her way.

“Yeah, see you!” Lily said as she walked into the basement.

The door closed, and I stared at the door. Huh. What a nice individual. Turning, I walked away, looking around.

It was daytime, now. How long was I out for? Eh, whatever. Time to go find Herald and pester him until he let me take the exam.

Yay!

Or, well, actually… I was kind of exhausted. Maybe I could go to the infirmary and sleep more? But I didn’t actually know where the infirmary was.

Or where I was….

I sighed listlessly. I wandered the halls, a few people out and about, all of them looking busy. Just like the basement, the Academy’s halls all looked similar outside of the paintings on the walls. I was very quickly lost.

“Do you need help?” Someone called out.

Looking to the side, I saw someone in a professor’s outfit. They looked tired, and their dark eyes were kind.

“Uh, yeah, I’m lost. Could you point me in the direction of the chancellor’s office?” I asked.

“May I know your name?” The tired professor asked.

“Uh, Persephone. I go by Percy,” I explained.

The professor hesitated, “As in the first princess of the Silver Kingdom? The one that’s missing?”

I hummed, shrugging. Uh… well… I wouldn’t say I’m missing… I shook my head, sighing. Oh well.

“Yeah, sounds about right,” I agreed.

A small spell appeared. Soon the professor was using the comm system to reach out to others. I awkwardly waited with the professor after he finished.

“So… What are you professor of?” I asked awkwardly.

“Protection magic,” The exhausted professor said tiredly.

“Oh! That’s useful,” I said.

I needed that! Desperately. The professor grunted. I pulled my lips into my mouth, looking away from the professor.

Cool. Right. Great. Nice.

Soon the man I was looking for walked up to me.

“Oh, hey dude. So, exam?”

“Where have you been?” Herald demanded, ignoring my query.

I blinked, frowning. I asked first! Agh, whatever.

“Uh… With Lance? Passed out in the soulmancy room? Wandering around lost?” I listed off, “It really depends on how long you’ve been looking for me.”

Herald stared down at me, exasperated, “Why didn’t you stay in the infirmary?!”

“Why would I? No one was there,” I said, “So I decided to hang out with Lance.”

“Then why, pray tell, did Lance say he had no idea where you were?” Herald asked, voice having lost all its patience.

I stared at him. Despite his frazzled mood, his hair was sleek in its pony-tail. He, Aph, and Val all had really sleek, straight hair. His black suit couldn’t say the same thing, though, looking windswept.

Did he just leave a closet with a student or something? Jesus.

“Well he left me in the soulmancy room. So if he looked and I wasn’t there it would make sense he’d say that,” I muttered in response, shrugging, “He also kind of freaked out before I passed out, so I dunno. Why do you expect me to know?”

Herald looked up at the ceiling for a moment, then he sighed.

“Come with me. Now.”

The man turned on his heel, stalking off. He was walking quite quickly.

“Ooh~,” I oohed, jogging to follow him, “Am I taking my exam now?”

“No.”

Oh. Um…

“Am I… being kicked out?” I wondered.

“No.”

What?

“Oh. Uh… Huh. Then where are we going?” I asked curiously.

Herald didn’t look at me, seeming furious. Why was he so mad?

“Back to the infirmary, so the doctors and healers there can take care of you.”

“… That’s lame,” I refused, stopping, “Why don’t you just give me the ex—“

Magic floated me off the ground.

No no nononono “nononono!”

My limbs flailed wildly. The moment I was in reach I clung to Herald. My arms wrapped around his head, legs wrapping around his chest.

“SetmedownI’msorryplease,” I begged, wrapped around him with my eyes closed tightly.

The magic released me.

I dropped to the ground carefully, relieved. My balance didn’t allow me to stay standing.

“Oh sweet land, oh how I love you. Never leave me again.”

I hugged the floor. My heart was hammering, lungs burning.

“Get up, or I’—“ Herald cut himself off as I shot up.

That was a threat. He was threatening me? I gave him a hurt and scared look. Don’t threaten me! I don’t want to be floated. Don’t float me.

Herald sighed, continuing to walk without finishing his sentence. I chased after him, wiping the tears out of my eyes and sniffling.

Oh thank fuck. I wasn’t about to lose my connection to sweet, beautiful, amazing gravity. Oh how I love you, great gravity, my beautiful and lovely force of nature. May you stay with me forever. And ever. Beyond eternity. Even after the heat death of the universe, may you continue to prevail above all else, you beautiful law of physics you.

“I’ll have to note it in your record that you have a crippling fear of flying,” Herald muttered, face and ears pink.

His hand was covering his mouth.

“I do not,” I mumbled, sullen, rubbing at my chest.

I just don’t trust other people with my body when I’m not touching the ground. People carrying me is just as bad as people floating me. Or, well, kind of. If I’m not clinging to the person, floating is much worse.

After a long time of exposure, I was able to deal with Valentine doing it. I thought that would mean I’d be okay with others floating me, too. I guess not.

The moment we got to the infirmary, Herald cast a giant spell that bound me to the bed.

I gaped at him, “What? This is unfair! You can’t just lock me here for a week.”

“Yes, I can. That is exactly what I am doing.”

I huffed, looking at the bed and the magic with annoyance.

“How is Professor Lance supposed to keep me from dying if I’m locked onto the bed?”

Herald hesitated, the steps he was taking away from me stopping. He turned, gaze intent and expression shifting away from the embarrassment it had been stuck on for awhile.

“Is that what you two were doing?” The chancellor asked.

I looked up at the man, raising my eyebrows.

“Huh? Yeah, what else would we be doing?” I asked curiously, “I don’t know exactly what, but he seemed pretty confident the reason I didn’t die sooner was because of his soulmancy stuff.”

“Die sooner?” Herald repeated faintly.

“Well, yeah,” I agreed, “It’s an exaggeration. Referencing me collapsing after coughing up my own blood. Do you not know what exaggeration is?”

Herald grew annoyed, his eyes narrowing slightly as his emerald eyebrows scrunched.

“Yes, I am aware of what exaggeration is,” The man drawled, irritated.

“Oh. Then why were you confused?” I asked, voice showing how bewildered I was.

Why was he confused if he already knew? That was weird. I was scared he thought I was actually being genuine, but if he already knew…

Herald scoffed, shaking his head as he turned away, “If he needs to do soulmancy, he can do it within the infirmary.”

I harrumphed, flopping petulantly back onto the bed I was magically chained to. It was actually really comfortable. I watched Herald leave with a pout.

Eventually, bored, I ended up falling asleep.