In case you're wondering, she never got that autograph, as far as I'm aware anyway. The woman did some voodoo or whatever on us and dragged us off the roof. Quite an impressive feat considering with everything I was carrying I was probably pushing four or five hundred pounds. She dropped us on the street and crammed me and the girl into what I assume was a police car. I couldn't say for sure, if it was a car it looked very different from any of the rusted scrap I'd seen in the wasteland.

If it was, then that would make it my first time actually riding in a car. As far as experiences go, it could have been worse. At least the driver wasn't pointing a gun at me or threatening to gut me. We were driven a short distance to another building. If this was a police car, then that'd probably make this a police station. Wish I could say for sure but, as if I needed something else to show me I wasn't in Nevada anymore, there wasn't a lick of English to be found. The closest I could get were these blocks that looked like letters, but that made even less sense. These people obviously spoke English, why the hell did they write like this?

Maybe the Chinese were still around here?... Questions for another time.

The stripper-witch walked us in and separated us. The cops present took one look at the armory I was walking around with and practically stripped me down to my underpants. Guess bringing the park clothes wasn't a bad idea, this place was a bit drafty. The only things I didn't let them take were my helmet and mask. I made the mistake of not protect my head only once. Not again, not in unknown territory.

Also, remember when I said the world seemed a bit bigger before? It wasn't. Whatever happened in the rift changed me. Most of the scars and muscle I'd gotten over the past couple of months dealing with the shenanigans surrounding the dam and Vegas were gone along with a couple inches of height. I was getting a sinking feeling in my gut that I wasn't getting the booze I was carrying back any time soon.

The cops took my finger prints and dropped me in another room. I recognized the classic one way mirror of an interrogation chamber immediately. If this was going to go anything like my chat with Silus, then some idiot was probably about to kick the door in and 'accidently' beat whatever information they wanted out of me. Just my luck.

I sat there for about twenty or thirty minutes, absent mindedly checking my pip boy and twiddling my thumbs. Surprisingly, the hunk of metal on my arm already had a new community added: Vale. Not sure if that's the name of this city, but if the bracelet says yes then it's what I got. It also blurred out every other settlement, radio frequency, and active chore or 'quest' as the metal block called them. The map was still the same, but that made sense since I learned a few weeks ago it was just an over magnified piece of microfilm. As far as the map knew I was still in the Big Empty.

There was a cold clicking noise as the door leading out of the room swung open. In the doorway was the stripper-witch, holding some odd looking piece of glasses and metal. Her high heels clicked against the tile floor as she walked in. I got a good look of her. Vibrant green eyes, platinum blonde hair, fair skin, and an air that would probably send shivers down even Graham's spine… maybe, just possibly. I could write poetry about her figure, but I get the feeling it would be wholly inappropriate at this moment. Another time then.

She ran a finger across the pane of glass she was carrying and I could see a number of symbols and objects project onto it from somewhere. Never seen something like that before. Yet another surprise of the not-wasteland… wouldn't that just be land then?

She stood across from me in silence, doing nothing but tapping away on her piece of glass. I found it just a little uncomfortable. Part of me thought now would be an excellent time to strike up a conversation. Be civil, start with a nice simple topic.

"So-"

*You are suffering from whisky withdrawal.*

"-Do you always hang around police stations? That seems bad for business."

I promptly slap my hand over my mouth, or rather the ventilators of my mask, and pray that she speaks some alien language. Something that preferably has no overlap with the English language. The glare she gives makes it perfectly clear she understood every word I said in both literal and spiritual senses.

Great, I just called the woman who could take down a Vertibird a prostitute to her face. If there is a god in this world, may he have more mercy on me than whatever one was in the Mojave.

"My, that isn't a very nice thing to say." Another voice said from the doorway.

In walks someone completely new. He looked to be a man in his late thirties. He had shaggy silver hair and brown eyes hidden behind a pair of spectacles that almost looked too small for his eyes. He was dressed in a black suit with a green turtle neck and a small metal cross around his neck. He also had an odd looking cane, it looked like it had a bunch of gears and a guard of some kind. He seems reasonable though, maybe I can-

"So you're her pimp?"

I promptly smash my own head against the table. The fuck is wrong with me!? … Oh, right, withdrawal.

"… neither is that." He says. Seating himself in the chair across from me.

"I'm sorry." I try to convey my honesty while keeping my head to the table. "I say really stupid shit when I get hung over."

Also when I'm drunk, high, in pain, or in an otherwise unstable mindset. But no reason to tell him that.

"Well then… perhaps this will help."

There was a soft clinking of glass beside my head. I lifted my head and saw the small cup of black coffee the man had placed beside me. Even through the mask it smelled fresh brewed and warm.

"I'm afraid it's not very strong." The man continued with a mischievous smile "But this was what the officers had ready."

Under normal circumstances, I would throw the coffee in his face and attack him with the cup. As a general rule of thumb you don't accept free drinks in the wasteland. But this wasn't the wasteland, and while I had no clue who these people were I had a pretty good radar for if 'this person is going to kill/rape/eat/steal from me'. While the lady was red in the face and clearly wanted to retaliate for the prostitute comments, neither of them was trying to be threatening.

I sat up and gingerly lifted the gas mask just above my mouth. Taking care not to give either of them a good look of my face. I didn't have a reason to run or fight, but if I did it would be better if neither of them could identify me. I took a sip of the black liquid and felt like I just got a whiff of turbo. This stuff was weak? This was probably the best cup of coffee I'd ever had. What the hell?

I took a long swig and set the cup down, sliding my mask back into place with it.

*you are no longer suffering from whisky withdrawal*

"Thank you." I say nodding to the man.

He returns the nod. "You're welcome. I'm Professor Ozpin."

"Professor?" I gave a small chuckle "Funny name, I'm Courier Six."

Now it was his turn to chuckle, "Perhaps the hang over wasn't the issue."

"Hey, someone needs to play the joker."

"I believe it's 'play the fool'"

"Eh, I'm good with either."

I relaxed a smidge. It was slowly becoming apparent they weren't going to attack me yet. At least Ozpin wasn't, didn't know about ms. Teacher.

"So then, Cour-"

Ozpin stopped when he noticed my right hand snap into a fist. I struggled to keep myself in check

"… I take it you prefer to be called different?"

"Six." I strain. "Please just call me Six."

"Very well, Mr. Six."

I relax, my fist unclenching and I no longer feel the need to punch the man who gave me coffee.

"Would you mind telling me why you were on that roof tonight?"

"Sight-seeing."

Ozpin fixed me with a stare "… Is that so?"

"Yeah, see, I'm not from around here. I was trying to find my way home and got kind of lost. I thought a better view of the city would help me."

Technically I was telling the truth. Technically I wasn't from anywhere around here. Technically I want to go home. Technically a better view would help me get home if I actually knew this world. Remember kids, technicalities are important, they make half-truths whole.

"You thought that standing on a roof with…" Ozpin paused and pulled a small slip of paper from the inside of his suit jacket. "sixteen distinct firearms, three bladed weapons, two blunt weapons, fourteen explosive devices, three sets of different armor, an entire pharmacy's worth of alcohol and narcotics, several hundred rounds of ammunition in varying form, and enough garbage to fill a dumpster would help you find your way home.

Three bladed weapons? Guess they weren't counting the switch blade. I wouldn't either at this point, that thing's busted.

"Yeah~, see, I'm very lost."

"I would imagine so." Ozpin returned the paper to his suit and motioned for ms. Teacher to join us. She handed him the pane of glass and he dragged his finger across it until a panel of text appeared. "It seems that you have no finger prints on file."

"I told you, I'm not from around here."

"Yes, but that wouldn't explain why your finger prints couldn't be found in a global database."

If I wasn't wearing the helmet and mask he probably would have noticed I have a couple of poker tells. It's the reason I don't play often. I really wasn't expecting this place to have its shit together that well. I was gonna have to play this off.

"Yeah, my parents were a couple of loners."

"Loners?" Ozpin asked, amused.

"Yeah, they were the sort of crazy people who'd barricade themselves somewhere in the mountains. Far, far away from civilization. They really didn't like authority."

"Oh, well that must have been an interesting upbringing."

"Yes sir, spent most of my days reading, climbing trees, and raging against the machine."

Ozpin chuckled lightly, "If you don't mind me asking, how old are you?"

At this moment, I saw a chance to get me booze back. I may not have been as burly as I was a few hours ago, but I could just play it off as being underdeveloped or something. I probably couldn't pass for my actual age, I'll have to shoot low then. Just need to take this nice and easy.

"I'm twenty one sir"

I coughed suddenly and Ozpin let out another chuckle. I knew what that was. I hadn't experienced one of those in years. My voice hadn't cracked like that since I was seventeen. Wonderful, I wasn't just smaller, I actually was a kid again. GOD FUCKING DAMMIT. Goodbye alcohol, you sweet fiery mistress.

"From the sound of your voice." Ozpin said with a sly smile "I'd say you were just barely seventeen."

"Yeah, well, it makes it easier to go places when they think you're older."

"I have no doubt of that."

"If you don't mind, I'd like to collect my stuff and get going. I've got a long walk home."

"Of course. I just need you to answer one more question for me."

Ozpin flicked his finger across the pane of glass several times. I saw images and text pass, not sure what they were but I suppose they weren't my immediate concern. Ozpin stopped swiping the screen and put the pane down in front of me. The frozen image of a fully colored roof was plainly visible. Ozpin tapped the glass and the motion gained some animation. I could see bits of film grain around the edges of the picture and a few bugs and birds flew into and out of frame. I watched for a few seconds with nothing happening. Then arcs of electricity began to spark off of the roof for no apparent reason, followed by a burst of blue light and a brown blob crash landing on the roof. Only after it careened to a stop did I recognize the familiar shape of my riot helmet and coat. The footage sped up, my body remained still for a number of minutes before randomly jerking to the side and vomiting. The footage ceased and Ozpin reclaimed his chunk of glass.

"… I can explain." I said, suddenly feeling very scrutinized

"I would certainly hope so." Ozpin's smile suddenly seemed a bit more cunning and sinister. "Because my last question was going to be if you'd be willing to tell us the truth."

Fuck me, this guy was a lot more dangerous than any other 'professor' I'd met. Most of them would piss themselves if I moved wrong. Where the hell am I?

"… where would you like me to start?"

…

It was a very long conversation. Mostly one sided, Ozpin was content to listen and ask the occasional question for context. I made sure to cherry pick what I was telling him, otherwise I'd be stuck here even longer. Plus, there were a number of things I felt I really shouldn't tell the man who is clearly pumping me for information.

So, basic gist of what I told him: Big war that ended in two countries setting the world on fire. Some people survive, find the scorched planet, and struggle to survive on the bones of what's left. Some people survived in bunkers designed for twisted experiments. Some people managed to start building countries again. Some people get eaten alive by whatever animals evolved to survive in the wasteland. I made sure to only give the specifics he asked for. If he didn't ask, then it was a secret I had in case of an emergency later.

The conversation finally began to wind down. Ozpin looked nonplused by my story. Something told me he was a man that very little could surprise. Ms. Teacher on the other hand had lost the red and looked at me curiously. I doubt she'd forgotten my earlier comments, but at least my head wasn't on the immediate chopping block… I think.

"… In short-" Ozpin finally said "You're from a world that was destroyed by war. In attempt to fix your world you found a way to travel to the past, but in the process wound up here instead."

"Yes sir, in a nut shell."

Not entirely accurate, but I had no reason to correct him.

The two of us sat in silence for a moment. Ozpin had a solemn look on his face, contemplative even.

"… You're taking this awfully well." I say, twiddling my thumbs

Ozpin gave another chuckle "It's a strange world, would you believe me if I told you a few decades ago our worlds may have stood the chance of suffering similar fates?"

"Honestly? I don't even consider the idea of other worlds unless I'm drunk or bored out of my skull. Still though, you're clearly taking this better than your friend."

Ozpin turned back and looked at ms. Teacher. She immediately snapped to attention, hoping Ozpin didn't notice the sudden slip of emotion. He turned back to me with a smile.

"Don't mind Ms. Goodwitch, not everyone can take a story like yours in stride."

'… Ms. Goodwitch? Well, that's a little ironic.'

"So," I say, stretching a little in my seat. "I guess the question is: what happens next?"

"I believe that depends on you." Ozpin said, fiddling with his cane.

"Well, if it's all the same to you-" I rose from my chair. "I'd like to try and find a way home."

"Oh? From what it sounded like, there isn't much there to call home."

"Yea, well, that doesn't mean I don't have ties there. Thanks for the coffee, but I should probably head out. Happy trails."

I walked towards the door and Ms. Goodwitch stepped in front of me. I got the feeling they weren't going to let me go easy.

"Mr. Six." Ozpin continued "How much do you know about our world?"

"I know you're moon looks like somebody took a bat to a dinner plate."

"Yes, one of them does."

'One of them? This place had more than one moon?'

"But what do you know about the creatures of this world?"

"Not much, but I don't plan on sticking around long enough for a biology lesson."

"I believe we both know that is a lie, Mr. Six."

"Do we now?"

"Yes, I have no doubt that if returning to your world were so easy, you'd already have done it."

'Shit, this man is trying to suss me.'

I could feel my fists tightening. I didn't like the idea of having to beat the shit out of two people who, as far as I knew, were basically just trying to get a handle on things. But if they were going to stop me from getting home then my conscience was going to have to take back seat for a bit.

"If that's the case, then I'm more than willing to help."

My fists relaxed and I turned back to the man sitting at the interrogation table. He'd turned back in his chair to look at me.

"I have friends in a number of positions that could help you in your efforts. I could provide you with shelter and food in the meanwhile and perhaps help you learn a little about this world. I would just need you to hear me out."

I got the nagging feeling in my gut this guy would do fine in the Mojave. Hell, he'd probably end up running the place.

"… Alright." I returned to my seat. "What're your terms?"

…

Very few people have ever gotten a bird's eye view of the Mojave. There aren't a lot of ways for a normal wastelander to actually fly. Maybe if they joined the NCR and were lucky enough to hitch a ride in a Vertibird. But for the average person, getting to fly was a luxury no one could afford.

Yet here I was, standing inside what I can only assume is some sort of airship, flying towards some school I really wanted nothing to do with. It was a small consolation I guess, getting to see everything from so high up. Everything looked so damn small.

This was the deal. I go to what's basically a military academy and Ozpin helps me find my way home. I didn't know for a fact whether or not I could trust him. But I'd be an idiot to turn down food and shelter in a strange land. If he kept trying to get information out of me or started screwing with the TPPT, I doubt there would be anyone who could stop me from leaving.

Plus, they hadn't given me my stuff back. I had the park clothes and my helmet still, but they told me they'd put it all in a locker for me to take when I got there. Which was fine, I'd probably have trouble carrying it all without getting plastered anyway.

Still, I somehow managed to stick out from the crowd anyway. Everyone around me was wearing some sort of ridiculous clothing. Some people were in dresses or suits, others were in armor, others still were dressed like they were from some pre-war kung-fu flick. How the hell I stuck out was beyond me. I was dressed like a normal person, sans helmet, while most everyone else looked like some walking-talking crime against the eyes.

Anyway, The ships were taking course for some building I could see in the distance. It looked like a Cliffside castle, with a central tower that'd probably put the Lucky 38 to shame. My money was on that being Beacon, the giant light on the tower made it pretty obvious.

The trip was slow, not sure how fast the ships were actually going but it felt like it was taking forever. Still, it gave me time to try and take in the world. As soon as the ship landed, I was probably gonna take a look around.

I heard the sound of whimpering next to me and saw this guy looking out the window. He was wearing armor, Jeans, and some weird long-sleeve shirt thing. He had blonde hair, blue eyes, and looked like he was about to lose his lunch.

"… Feelin' a bit green around the gills?" I ask, wanting to avoid getting vomit on my only clean shirt.

"Mhmm." He grunted, dry swallowing to keep his stomach intact.

"Well, it's not my place, but I can give you a tip if you want."

He closed his eyes and nodded.

"Smart, take deep breaths through your nose and let them out through your mouth. Do it slowly, It'll calm your nerves."

He nodded and did what I told him. It took a bit, but I could see he was doing better. I wandered away from the kid, figuring he could handle it from there.

The narrative has been taken without authorization; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident.

On one edge of the room, there was this weird holo-screen. On it, there was a woman telling stories about different events going on around the area. My guess? That was this world's equivalent to the news.

"-The robbery was lead by nefarious criminal Roman Torchwick, Who continues to Evade Authorities."

A mugshot of Torchwick came on screen, I nearly took a step back when I recognized When I recognized Mr. bowler-hat.

'So his name is Roman? Gonna file that away for future use.'

"If you have any information on his whereabouts, Please contact the Vale police department. Back to you Lisa."

'Police? Those clowns didn't do shit when we were blowing up roof tops last night. The fuck are they gonna do?'

The screen shifted back to a woman with Lavender colored hair. The image of a planet was spinning in the background. This was my first time seeing a working 'tv' of some kind that didn't just have 'technical difficulties' plastered across the screen. This was actually pretty interesting.

"Thank you Cyril." The woman said cheerfully. "In other news, This Saturday's Faunus Rights protest turned dark, when members of the white fang disrupted the Ceremony."

Two images appeared on the screen. One looked like the banner of a softcore Raider group, with what appeared to be a Yao guai head crossed with three slash marks.

The other image was of a group of people with picket signs. I assumed they were the 'Faunus' Lisa just mentioned. But they didn't look all that different from regular people… wait, did some of them have animal ears attached to their heads?

"The once peaceful organization has now disrupted-"

The woman was cut off as the holo-screen faded. As it returned, a copy of Ms. Goodwitch appeared followed by a peaceful chiming.

"Hello, and welcome to beacon." She spoke, this was the first time I'd actually heard her speak. She had a nice voice.

"Who's that?" I heard a girl ask from somewhere behind me.

"My name is Glynda Goodwitch." The hologram spoke

"Oh." I heard again.

'Glynda Goodwitch…' For some reason I got this nagging feeling in the back of my skull when I heard her full name.

The hologram continued. "You are among the privileged few who have received the honor of being selected to attend this prestigious academy."

'Wow, privileged to attend a school where they prepare you to get yourself killed. Boy, aren't I just blessed?'

"Our world is experiencing an incredible time of peace, and as Future Huntsmen and Huntresses it is your duty to uphold it."

'Yes heroes, go forth, go forth and die with honor!'

"You have demonstrated the courage needed for such a task and now it is our turn to provide you with the knowledge and the training to protect our world."

The Hologram faded and everyone rushed to the windows. Apparently none of them had noticed until right this second that yes, we are high over a city.

"You can see signal from up here." A familiar voice said from behind me.

I turned part way and saw a familiar tiny girl in a red and black outfit looking out the window opposite mine. It wasn't until I saw that ridiculous red hood and cape that I recognized her. It was the girl with the scythe-sniper rifle-thing who nearly got torched with me last night. What was she doing here? Did Ozpin have a chat with her too? Whatever the case, I wasn't in the mood to make friends. I went into stealth mode and leaned against one of the support struts on the wall. We'd probably land before too much longer anyway.

The boy I'd tried to help earlier stumbled away from his window clutching his face.

'Guess he didn't take my advice, his loss.'

I watched him stumble across the room towards a garbage can. He passed by Tiny girl and paused for a bit, probably trying to keep everything inside. I know I saw some bile come out and land on the shoes of some blonde standing next to Tiny.

I got the feeling the next few minutes were going to be entertaining.

…

The ship pulled alongside a landing pad and the doors opened to let us off. Vomit boy went first, he practically ran out of the ship at full speed. Everyone else just sorta trickled out after him. We followed a cut stone path away from the landing area, before us was the castle I'd seen earlier.

I was right, definitely bigger than the lucky 38. Hell, probably most of the strip and freeside too. The nature wasn't bad either, lotta trees and flowers to act as ground cover. There was even a bit of shrubbery for the wayward knight with a speech impediment. Everything looked well maintained and put together. All of the street lamps looked in order, none of the concrete was cracked, Hell they even had a moat surrounding the castle. Classy, now I'm considering putting one around freeside. Might as well put the irradiated water to use.

I noticed tiny girl was having some sort of mini seizure with her blonde friend. She kept darting all over the place and making motions to people.

'Glad I avoided that mess.'

She then took out her scythe and began waving it around. It was at that moment I made a bee line away from the manic little girl. I took off down a side path away from where everyone else was heading. When I heard the sound of an explosion echo from behind me, I knew I'd made the right choice.

The path I followed lead me through a garden filled with trees that I'd never seen before. Granted I'd never seen a tree that was actually alive outside of Zion, but that's beside the point. There were also bushes with red flowers around the garden as well. It was nice, peaceful. I had no clue what I was supposed to do next. Ozpin had told me to get on the ship and get to the academy. The rest would "Sort itself out".

'Yeah, well shit takes a while to sort'

I walked over to a sturdy tree and sat down underneath it. I put my hands behind my head, leaned back, and closed my eyes. It'd been a while since I could take a nap. Glad I found a place where I could do that. Don't know how long I was out for, probably only a few minutes at the most. Then along came trouble.

"-Hey that explosion was an accident!" A familiar voice cried

image [https://images-wixmp-ed30a86b8c4ca887773594c2.wixmp.com/f/c5956089-ecb3-4ee9-8b87-bdaa8d0724e7/dgexeyb-5d4f3561-079b-4303-af6e-7d9217759d43.png/v1/fill/w_1280,h_1038,q_80,strp/commission__saw_me_sitting_alone__by_alex_kellar_dgexeyb-fullview.jpg?token=eyJ0eXAiOiJKV1QiLCJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiJ9.eyJzdWIiOiJ1cm46YXBwOjdlMGQxODg5ODIyNjQzNzNhNWYwZDQxNWVhMGQyNmUwIiwiaXNzIjoidXJuOmFwcDo3ZTBkMTg4OTgyMjY0MzczYTVmMGQ0MTVlYTBkMjZlMCIsIm9iaiI6W1t7ImhlaWdodCI6Ijw9MTAzOCIsInBhdGgiOiJcL2ZcL2M1OTU2MDg5LWVjYjMtNGVlOS04Yjg3LWJkYWE4ZDA3MjRlN1wvZGdleGV5Yi01ZDRmMzU2MS0wNzliLTQzMDMtYWY2ZS03ZDkyMTc3NTlkNDMucG5nIiwid2lkdGgiOiI8PTEyODAifV1dLCJhdWQiOlsidXJuOnNlcnZpY2U6aW1hZ2Uub3BlcmF0aW9ucyJdfQ.0pYSjpzTUAd_kAKOx-oTqvI7jb17dIVTWO1pwa4tyXA]

'Oh, please, no. let me rest, please?'

I cracked my eyes open and who else could be walking down the path but Tiny and Vomit boy.

"Well, the name's Jaune Arc." Vomit boy said. "Short, sweet, rolls off the tongue. Ladies love it."

"…Bullshit." I say under my breath

Then, as though the deity watching over me wished for me to suffer, they heard me. Somehow they heard me whispering and noticed me lying under the tree. Vomit boy, or Jaune I guess, leapt out of his skin while Tiny just looked confused, before recognizing my helmet.

"Oh, hi!" She waved and started walking towards me, Jaune was following close behind.

'Fuck me, I don't want to talk to these guys.'

I stood up and brushed myself off. She stood in front of me with a nervous smile.

"I'm Ruby" She extended her hand out to me "We sorta met last night?"

"Yea, I remember you." I sighed, accepting her hand and giving it a firm shake. "Courier Six."

I finally got a good look at her face. Small nose, pale skin, and a bright smile framed by raven hair that had crimson undertones. There were also her eyes. I'm pretty sure silver isn't a natural eye color, but they were hard to ignore.

She gave me a confused look.

"Yes, that's my name. Word of warning, if you're going to call me something, call me six."

"ok?" She said in equal confusion. Great, now I seem like a weirdo. Can't be any worse than Jaune though.

"So, you two know each other?" Jaune asked

"Not really" Ruby answered "We met last night after a couple of guys tried to rob me."

"Think they tried to do a bit more than that." I chime in

"What were you doing on that roof anyway?" Ruby asked

"… sight-seeing."

"Oh, see anything cool?"

My mind did a quick demo reel of all the events that happened shortly after I arrived in this world.

"Nah, you see one city, you've seen them all."

"So I guess you travel a lot then?" Jaune asked

"Yea, just a bit." I nod my head

"Well, nice to meet you Six." Jaune said extending his hand

I shook it. "Nice to meet you as well Jaune."

Ruby nodded and silence fell amongst the group. Wonderful, I show up and the conversation dies. I decided it was my job to keep things going. I looked at the two of them and noticed they were both armed.

"That's a nice sword you got there." I say, eyeing the blade strapped to Jaune's waist.

"Yea?" He asked with a bright smile. He drew it and waved it around a little bit. The blade was worn and scratched, it'd probably seen better days before this boy got ahold of it. From the way he was swinging it about, I got the distinct impression he didn't know the first thing about actually wielding one. He then grabbed the scabbard from his hip and put it on his arm. A set of wings shot out on either side, turning the flat metal tube into a shield.

"Not bad." I say with a nod. That was actually pretty nifty.

"You think that's cool?" Ruby said with a broad grin. "Check this out."

She reached behind her back and pulled out a red slab of steel. She pulled a latch and the slab expanded into her gigantic scythe. She swung it around as it opened and slammed the tip into the ground. The gardener wasn't going to be happy about that.

"Whoa." Jaune said in surprise "That's a big scythe"

'no shit Watson.'

"It's also a high impact sniper-rifle." She said with an accomplished grin on her face.

"… What?" Jaune asked

"She said it's a gun." I explain for him

"Oh. Cool!"

"What about you six?" Ruby asked, looking me up and down.

"I –uh, kinda don't have anything on me at the moment. It's all in a locker I gotta go find."

"Aw." Ruby said, disappointed

"Speaking of finding things-" Jaune cut in "Shouldn't we be finding our way to the entrance ceremony?"

"I thought you knew where it was?" Ruby asked

"Me? I was just following you."

I lifted my pip-boy and flipped through the data screen. I found a note for the opening ceremony and highlighted it. The map was no good, but the compass that pointed me around worked just fine. I really don't understand how this thing works, and at this point asking doesn't make a lot of sense. The compass needle pointed back in the direction they'd come.

"It's back that way." I motioned

Ruby stared at the symbiotic hunk of metal latched to my arm. A twinkle in her eyes.

"What is that?" she asked

"This?" I motioned to the pip-boy "A ten pound hunk of metal that points me where I need to go."

"Sounds uncomfortable." Jaune added

"Only until you get used to it."

"Well, I guess we should get going then." Ruby said, turning to walk back the way they'd come. "You coming Six?"

"I don't know, didn't your parents ever teach you not to wander around with Strangers?"

"My mom told me Strangers are just friends you haven't met yet." Jaune chimed in

"Heh. She sounds like a nice person."

'-and someone who wouldn't last five minutes in the wasteland.'

…

We walked through the giant stone arch that lead to the courtyard of the Academy. Not sure how they missed everyone crowding here, but here we were now. Not sure if it's just because everyone was dressed in such outlandish outfits or what, but no one really stood out to me. They all just kinda seemed like silhouettes if people. Eh, probably just my imagination.

"Ruby! Over here!" Shouted the blonde I'd seen her with earlier. "I saved you a spot!"

Ruby waved to her and turned back to us briefly. "Sorry, gotta go. See you guys after the ceremony."

She smiled and hurried off to her friend.

"H-hey… ugh" Jaune grumbled.

I took that as my cue to silently leave. Before Jaune even noticed I'd already vanished into the crowd. Not that I stayed there long anyway, I went to the nearest wall and stayed there with my back to it. I just managed to lose my last group, didn't want to start gathering another one. I stayed there for about a minute before Ozpin took the stage set up at one end of the courtyard.

"Ahem- I'll keep this brief." His voice echoed over a PA system. "Many of you have traveled here today in search of knowledge, others out of a sense of duty, and others still in an attempt to make something of yourselves."

'I Wonder, which one do I fall in?'

"However, you have all come for a singular goal, to hone your skills and acquire the knowledge to improve. Once completed, you plan to dedicate your life to the defense of this world and its people."

I heard some murmuring from the crowd, could see a few smiles too. Most of them probably had no idea the things that were probably waiting for them.

"But looking out amongst you? All I see is wasted energy. Light, burning itself out with no true intention, nor conviction. You assume that by coming here and honing yourselves you will find that intention, that purpose and direction. But your time here will only show you how far knowledge can carry you. It is up to you to decide where you go from there, and take that first step."

Ozpin adjusted the sweater around his neck and walked off the stage. Ms. Goodwitch soon took his place at the Mic.

"Tonight everyone will be gathered in the Ballroom. Tomorrow, you will face initiation."

'Wonderful, now I'm gonna get no sleep, and then get hazed for the next twelve hours.'

Glynda dismissed the crowd and we were left to roam. I didn't really care what the rest of them did, but I decided I wanted to make sure I hadn't lost anything and went looking for my locker.

…

Good news, I found my locker after about an hour of wandering around. Guess Ozpin has a sense of humor, he gave me number 006. I'm honestly surprised he managed to fit all of my stuff in there. Though I wasn't surprised to find he'd taken my booze and the few meds I kept with me. Should've seen it coming. I left most of my stuff in there anyway, I don't have a reason to put my armor on right this second and all of the weapons and junk would probably slow me down. But a pair of spike knuckles and a couple of bottle caps never did me any harm.

Until, that is, I found the bad news. This world doesn't accept bottle caps. Should've figured they'd have a stable enough economy to not rely on bits of rusted steel and water for currency. I did have some other stuff on me that probably would've worked as currency. But I got the feeling using legion denarius, coins that are made of solid gold, might be a bit over kill. We were also left to fend for ourselves for the night. They'd serve meals tomorrow, but we'd have to feed ourselves tonight. Not sure what everyone else did, but I lit a fire in the back corner of a garden and cooked some mantis legs. Tasty.

After that I kept wandering around until the sun started to set. Wish I'd thought to bring some sleep wear with me. But I've learned to make do. Gotta admit though, I'm glad this place has hot running water. I haven't had a good shower in weeks. Before you ask, no, most of the lucky 38's showers don't work. Trust me, I spent weeks trying to fix most of them. The few that do only run cold.

I kept my helmet off only momentarily to wash my hair off. Soon as I was done it went back on. I finished, stole someone's towel to dry off, and put the park stroller pants back on. I kept the shirt off, my undershirt would work fine for sleeping. We were all corralled into a large room with a hard wood floor. They were handing out some basic sheets and cushions for people to sleep on. It was getting late and some people were already settled in, though lights-out hadn't been called yet. I could see Ruby and her Blonde friend talking and lounging on their makeshift beds. Ruby was writing something and the blonde one was… looking strangely at some of the guys in the room. She said something and Ruby threw a pillow at her head.

I took a sheet and set myself into a corner. Didn't need a mattress, those things give people tetanus. At least they did in the wasteland. Either way, not taking a chance. Plus I'm used to huddling myself into a corner when I sleep on the road.

I back myself into a corner and slide to the floor, I lay the blanket on top of me and flick the switch on the side of my helmet to stop the eye holes of my mask from glowing. Things immediately became a lot dimmer from my point of view. That's all I really needed to resume that nap I was working on before. The helmet helped muffle the room a bit more and I could feel my eyes starting to get heavy. Sleep was upon me, all I need do is let it take me.

Then I heard the sound of a match being lit and my eyes were open in a flash. Though the light was dimmed without my lenses being lit they took in natural light just fine. A little off to my right, a girl with long black hair and a bow was lighting a candelabra. I leaned forward slightly and looked at her. She took notice of me and immediately took a step back, dropping her book in surprise. Her Golden eyes wide with surprise and her bow seeming to stand on end.

She just stared at me cautiously and I looked at her tiredly, not quite registering she probably couldn't tell I was just wondering why she was lighting candles. Then I remembered the book and looked down at it. It was a black leather bound tome with no images or wording on the outside. I reached out and picked it up from the floor, half tempted to take a look before remembering I can't read the weird symbols this place called an alphabet. I raised the book up and held it out to her. She looked at it cautiously and I waited patiently. She took it out of my hand and I made the best universal hand gesture I could think of for 'it's cool, just be quiet please'. I gave her a nod and settled back into my corner as she settled into her book.

I began to relax and let my mind go blank. Let the dark seep into my brain so I could maybe get some sleep. Deep breaths, slowly making my thoughts fade and my muscles-

"Helloooo!" a jovial voice sang as someone approached

'Graham dammit, what now?'

I raised my head and flicked the lights in my lenses back on. The Blonde was dragging Ruby over towards my corner, whether it was for me or the girl next to me I didn't know.

"I believe you two may know- Urk!" The blonde cut herself off short as she realized there was more than one person over here. Courier six: three, hapless kids: zip.

The blonde was wearing an orange tank top and black short shorts, Ruby was dressed in a black one and white sweatpants with frilly Rosebuds on them.

"Oh, hi Six." Ruby said with a smile.

I reached my hand out of my blanket and gave her a little wave. The Blonde girl looked back and for the between us. Then she got this weird grin on her face.

"So that's a definite two hundred percent increase. Told you it wasn't so bad."

I cocked my head to the side in confusion. Ruby just made a motion with her hand to ignore the blonde one.

"… aren't you the girl that exploded?" The black haired girl asked

Ruby turned to face the other girl while I just continued to look at them. Ruby caused an explosion?

"Umm, yeah." Ruby said in embarrassment "My name's Ruby." Ruby extended her hand to the black haired girl and was left hanging as the girl turned back to her book. Well someone's a bit catty.

"But- you could just call me crater… uh… actually, please just call me Ruby."

"… Okay" The black haired girl said in slight amusement.

I looked up at Ruby and did my best to convey 'What the hell are you doing?'

Apparently she got it and shot me back a pleading look, 'I don't know, help.'

"Sooo, what's your name?" the Blonde asked

The black haired girl sighed and looked up from her book. "Blake." She said

"Well, Blake, I'm Yang." The blonde girl said with a smile. "I'm Ruby's older sister… I like your bow."

I stared at Yang for a second before looking at Ruby. I flipped back and forth between the two for a moment. Trying to piece together the fact that these two girl who look absolutely nothing alike are sisters. Needless to say, my brain hurt after a minute.

"Thanks." Blake said curtly, probably wanting this conversation to end as much as I did.

"It goes great with your… Pajamas."

"… right."

Ruby started fidgeting awkwardly, I get the feeling she was uncomfortable having her sibling speak for her.

"Nice night, right?" Yang asked

"Yes, Just lovely. Almost as much as this book… Which I'm going to continue to read… as soon as you stop bugging me."

'Ooh, this girl is catty. I like her already.'

"Sorry Ruby." Yang shrugged "We tried, she's a lost cause."

"What's it about?" Ruby spoke up finally

"Hmm?" Blake asked

"The Book. Does it have a name?"

"… well" Blake began "It's about a man with two souls. Each fighting for control over his body."

"Oh yeah…" Yang rolled her eyes "That's… real lovely."

"Well it is when you consider it allegorically." I say softly.

"What?" Blake asked, turning to look at me. Ruby and Yang did the same. They looked interested in what I had to say. If this happens again I'm gonna have to test how good their hearing is.

"Oh uh, nothing, don't pay attention to the strange man in the mask."

I picked myself up from my corner and threw my blanket over my shoulder

"You ladies can have this corner, it's a bit too crowded for my taste. Have a good night."

I walked away from the conversation as another person joined it. Some girl who was white as snowflake in every sense of the word. I'd have assumed she was albino if it wasn't for the lack of a few other key traits. I could hear them shouting for a bit before the candle Blake had lit was snuffed. I slid into another corner and turned my helmet off. Finally getting sleep to claim my tired mind.

…

For once I actually managed to get some sleep. By the time my eyes popped open the sun was rising and people were beginning to rouse from their slumber. I peeled myself out of my corner and stretched a little. Back was a bit stiff, but that's what happens when you sleep on a wall. I twisted my head with my hands, cracking my neck a little. There weren't too many people currently awake, so the restrooms were probably deserted. I took the chance to go and brush my teeth and splash some water on my face. I do not know what the day will bring, but I will greet it with clean teeth and open eyes.

As I slid my helmet back on, the door to the restroom burst open as some kid with a stone face walked in. He was dressed in one of those kung-fu costumes I'd mentioned earlier. He was also being followed by this orange haired girl who kept buzzing around him, chattering like a jet addled radscorpion.

The guy gave me this pleading look as I walked past him. He couldn't see my face, but he had my condolences since I wasn't getting in the middle of that. I went back to the ballroom and returned my blanket to the pile of sheets people had borrowed from. After that I finally had the opportunity to sample what this place called food.

… At least, I would have if it didn't all look so strange. There was this yellow mush people were eating with some red sauce. Brown disks served with some sweet brown syrup. Stiff rectangles with some yellow grease smeared on the top. Brown tubes of meat and, what looked like, spices. Plus a whole assortment of fruits, grains, and cereals I didn't recognize. None of it looked even slightly familiar. Did the pre-war world have breakfast food like this? Because the only frame of reference I have is two hundred year old boxes of cereal. All I really knew was that it tasted like crap and sugar.

So I just looked at the cereal with the highest sugar count and poured myself a bowl. Something called Pumpkin Pete's Marshmallow Flakes. I couldn't find the Brahmin milk, so I settled for whatever 2% milk was. It tasted like water. I also snagged the closest thing I could find to a mutfruit. The cereal was disgusting, somehow this world managed to find something even worse than sugar bombs. Just a reminder, people found a way to make jet out of sugar bombs. Congratulations, parallel world whose name I don't know, you're officially worse than jet cooks.

At least the fruit wasn't bad. It was orange, pleasantly sweet, and didn't make me regret picking it up.

I cleaned up after my meal and headed to collect my gear. I was, so far, able to keep ahead of most of the crowd. I returned to my locker and stripped off the remaining half of the park outfit. Sliding back into my riot armor. I took my time putting it on. I wasn't sure if the police had messed with it while I was being interrogated, but I wasn't taking any chances of my armor falling out of place at the wrong moment.

By the time I finished, Kung-fu boy and motor mouth had caught up. Along with a bunch of other students. I could see Ruby and Yang collecting their Weapons and having a conversation about milk, for some reason. Jaune was wandering around with a slip of paper, complaining about the number six. I saw little miss snowflake talking with… with.

I stopped immediately when I saw the girl she was talking to. Even from a distance I could recognize the distinctive armor of the legion. The fuck was a legionnaire doing here? My hand reached into my locker and gripped the first pistol it could find. My thumb cocked back the hammer and my trigger finger hovered outside the guard. I was jumping to conclusions, I knew I was. There was no reason for the legion to be here. If I was wrong, I'd have blown an innocent girl's brains out and gotten myself a one way ticket to this world's equivalent to jail.

Then a thought occurred to me. The legion didn't let girls fight. I remember having to find information about that when I was dealing with the Khans. Plus, now that I was paying attention, her armor didn't look quite right. This girl couldn't have been a legionnaire. If she was, I don't think miss snowflake would be getting chummy with her so easy… right?

I took a deep breath and relaxed my grip on the gun. I moved the hammer back into position and looked to see what gun I'd grabbed in the first place. It was a 10MM pistol. I shrugged and slid it into a holster I kept on my hip. I followed it with a beat-up hunting rifle I brought with me. I had no clue what the 'initiation' was going to entail, I figured the two should suffice. Didn't want to blow my wad before I knew what I was up against.

I slid the rifle a loop I kept slung across my back. And looked back into the locker. Part of me felt I was going light for something like this and didn't like it. I reached back in and grabbed four of the grenades I brought with me. I wasn't particularly fond of them. I've never been good about timing my throws. But If I needed a bang, they'd work.

I strapped the grenades to my armor and closed the locker. I looked back to Snowflake and the Legionnaire and found Jaune was now talking to them. Well, not talking, more like he was trying to play Casanova and failing miserably. Though it seemed legion was taking an interest in him.

"Would all First Years please gather to Beacon Cliff?" Glynda's voice sounded from a nearby speaker. "Initiation will commence shortly."

The sound of machinery and metal on stone rang out and Jaune was suddenly pinned to the wall by the hood of his shirt. A large. Brass and red colored protruded from the garment that was once his hood. Legion approached him, patted him on the head, and removed the spear before exiting with snowflake in toe. Guess I was wrong?

Ruby and Yang approached him. I did to, but only because the exit was that direction anyway.

"Run into a bit of trouble, Lady killer?" Yang asked

"… I don't get it. My dad said all women look for is confidence." Jaune whined "What'd I do wrong?

"Perhaps you should've asked your mother." I say, catching everyone's attention. I offer a hand to the crumpled boy. He took it and shakily got off of the ground.

"Though 'Snow Angel', probably wasn't the best place to start either." Yang said teasingly

I looked at Yang in confusion, then back to Jaune. "You said that? Wow, you really are a dumbass."

Jaune made a sad whining noise and Ruby gave me a small scowl. Hey, just stating the obvious, the dude's a dumbass. She patted him on the back and they started off towards the exit. I felt a smack on mine as Yang walked past me. She gave me a smirk and sashayed away.

…

The cliff we gathered at overlooked a vast forest. It looked like it stretched for miles ahead of us. We were all lined up at the cliff edge, standing on metal plates. To my right was Jaune, fidgeting nervously, and to my left was Ruby, looking ready to burn the forest down. Ozpin and Glynda stood just in front of us. Probably to read us our last rites.

"For years, you've trained to be warriors." Ozpin said to the line of teenagers. "Today will be the day where we test you."

"Some of you may have heard that you will be assigned to teams." Glynda continued. "Allow me to clarify, Each of you will be placed on a team. Today.

"W-what?" Ruby said, her previous stoicism broken

A small murmur broke out amongst the crowd. Apparently I missed something, since when were teams a thing? I didn't agree to that.

"The teams you build today shall remain with you for the remainder of your days here at Beacon." Ozpin broke in "So it is best to partner with people who you will work well with."

Ruby made another dismayed noise. I was getting a similar feeling but at least had a mask that didn't show it.

"That said, the first person with whom you share eye contact shall remain your partner for the next four years."

Partners too? Oh I know I didn't sign up for any of this brahmin-crap.

"What!?" Ruby squeaked, clearly sharing my disdain for group activities.

"After you've found your partner, you will make your way to the northern end of the forest. There will be obstacles for you to overcome. Do not hesitate, or you will die."

Jaune made a noise that sounded like he was about to piss himself.

"You will be monitored the duration of your time in the forest, However you will be expected to fend for yourselves. The instructors will not intervene. At the far end of the Forest you will find an abandoned temple containing several relics. Each partnership shall collect one, then return here with it. We shall evaluate you and your relic to determine your mark. Are there any questions?"

"You gonna keep blabbing, or are we gonna get started?" I ask

Ozpin Smirked "Very well, prepare yourselves."

The students to my left all took odd stances, Jaune just raised his hand. "Um, sir, I've got a question?"

The sound of high pressure pistons and spring rang to my left. I watched as miss snowflake was launched off the Cliffside at highspeed.

'the hell…?'

"So, this landing strategy thing, uh, w-what is it?"

"Landing strategy?" I asked him, more students to my left took off into the air. "The hell are you talking about?"

"Yeah-" Jaune continued "We were told to prepare a landing strategy for the initiation earlier this morning."

More students to my left launched into the air as the pit in my stomach grew. "I don't remember that."

"It was right when everyone woke up, I assumed they were going to drop us off or give us parachutes."

"What time?"

I heard Yang take off into the air as Jaune continued. "I don't know, like seven thirty I think. Ms. Goodwitch said-"

I immediately tuned him out as my head whipped back to the two teachers standing in front of us. I ignored Ozpin and focused onto Goodwitch as I heard Ruby take off next to me. Goodwitch had the most satisfied smirk on her face I'd ever seen. Her eyes looking expectantly at the cold dish she just served me.

"YOU BITC-" I couldn't finish that sentence. The plate underneath me erupted and I was launched off the Cliffside.