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Grigory

I awoke suddenly in a cavern.

It was dimly illuminated by some form of crystals embedded into the walls, but otherwise reminded me of any cave one might find with its irregular shaped stone and occasional stalagmite.

I got to my feet and took stock.

There was no obvious way back to the surface despite having fallen through a hole to get here, only five or so tunnels in random directions.

There also was no sign of the giant boulder chunk that created the hole in the first place for some unknowable reason.

I found my jacket again, which might have been more useful if it wasn’t soaking wet.

Finally, and speaking of things that were soaked, I found Ami in a shallow pool nearby where I had awakened.

I sighed and pulled her out, it would do poorly for my conscience if she died of hypothermia in the middle of an unknown cave.

I spent a little bit of [Cure] to make sure she wouldn’t catch a cold, and wandered around the cave to see if I could find something flammable.

Luckily enough, I found some lumps of coal which had been shaken loose by the ceiling opening up… even if you couldn’t tell it had happened anymore.

I found a convenient area for a fire pit and placed some coal in it, as well as a shrub which had happened to have fallen in with us which I turned into kindling.

Next, I washed my hands and stripped off my clothes to make sure any residue from the coal didn’t ignite and explode when I enacted the following step… assuming my luck held out and I could find both flint and steel.

I massaged my temples.

How did I find myself in such annoying circumstances?

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Ami

I blinked the blurriness out of my eyes and spit the taste from my mouth, as I found myself in a cave or something.

I started to shiver, the cold stone against my skin leaving much to be desired.

Wait… against my skin?

I looked down to see I was in my underwear, my tan-lines all but on full display.

I tried to cover myself with my arms as I looked around.

What immediately caught my eye was the bearded man in his underwear sitting next to a flat-ish rock which was covered in our clothes.

From the steam coming off of them, and the flickering light reflecting off of him, I figured he somehow made a fire and was using the rock as a hot-plate.

Without giving me more than a moment’s glance, he spoke. “I’m sorry if you’re cold over there, it seemed warm enough when I checked earlier.”

I hazarded moving my arms to try and rub some feeling back into my hands. “Are you kidding? I’m freezing over here!”

He just shrugged. “It seems like an average temperature for autumn to me.”

“Oh yeah? Where’re you from? Russia?” I shot back.

He looked at me like I was stupid. “Yes.”

“That one’s on me, I should have been more specific… where were you born this second time?” I asked, dripping with sarcasm.

“Dzerzhinsky, from the Moscow Oblast.” He looked back down at the clothes and flipped my shirt over. “That aside, weren’t you cold? It’s warmer over here.”

I glared at him. “I bet you’d like that you pervert! Why don’t you switch places with me if you’re as fine with the cold as you say!”

He stood and stretched out his shoulders. “Just make sure not to let the clothes get scorched.”

With that, to my utter surprise, he and I switched places with absolutely no incident.

Not only that, but started meditating as soon as he sat down, like he was some sort of monk or something.

What is this guy’s deal?!

After a little while, I couldn’t take the silence anymore. “Trying to ascend to a higher plane over there?”

“I like to spend a portion of my meditation looking back upon my actions and self-reflecting, I’m currently in the process of doing just that.” He replied with a perfect evenness.

This tale has been pilfered from Royal Road. If found on Amazon, kindly file a report.

“No wonder you do it for so long, there might be a lot wrong to go over.” I mocked.

“Oh please, I doubt you’re even capable of sitting still, let alone such in-depth self-examination.” He countered, not even opening his eyes.

I was furious, but I wasn’t about to grace him with an answer, that’s exactly what he wanted.

Instead I decided to do some meditation of my own, that’d show him!

I straightened my posture, pulled my legs criss-cross, and… tried to figure out what to do next…

I read once online that breathing was important, but it wasn’t helping, it was just making me antsy doing nothing like that.

So I thought back to what he said and decided self-reflection was as good a start as any… after all, if someone as insufferable as him can do it, so can I.

I just picked the first thing that came to mind to think about, which happened to be the last thing I said to my father before he returned to Japan… and the expression on his face as those words left my lips.

Sometimes I wonder what life would have been like if I went with him instead of staying in America with Mom, like he wanted.

I’d probably be a flake just like him.

I was abruptly taken from my thoughts as something soft fell into my lap.

I opened my eyes to see my clothes, nicely folded, and the bearded menace, now dressed, standing above me.

I recoiled, not even noticing he had moved.

“Excuse me for interrupting, I figured you’d want to get dressed sooner than later.” That said, he returned to where he was, except turned away to give me privacy.

I capitalized on his gesture and started re-robing.

Maybe it was because I was already in a contemplative mood, but I started to wonder why the bearded man across the way hadn’t seemed to… notice me… whatsoever.

I bit the bullet, I was too curious. “Are you… into guys?”

“What do you mean?”

“You know… like… gay…”

He said nothing for just long enough that I thought no answer was coming, but at last one came.

“Not as far as I’m aware? I don’t think about such matters often.”

“How could you not know?!” I asked, incredulously.

“Whenever I felt sexual urges, I would meditate to dispel it. Sex was never one of my goals… after all, my congregation would be my family.”

“So, was part of your meditation today like that, so you could focus on other things than me?”

“Briefly, it was over before you awakened.” He sighed. “Are you clothed yet? We need to get going.”

I decided some revenge-teasing was in order. “What if I said… I was naked?”

He stood up and started walking toward a tunnel. “I’d leave you behind.”

“Hey wait! I was kidding!” I called after him.

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Grigory

I don’t think I’ve met a more insufferable woman in my life, at least Ursula becomes cordial in her own crude way when you’ve known her for long enough.

Ami will find a topic and attach her whole soul to it.

I bet she could reincarnate just based on that willpower alone.

On the other hand, she’s very easy to read, which makes it easy to trick her into positive habits, such as meditation… though I wish she’d just follow my advice instead.

Either way, after the sexuality question was broached, she wouldn’t let it go and kept asking modified versions of it between insults to my person.

After the fourth occurrence, I decided to posit a question of my own. “How old are you?”

She seemed surprised to hear it, but obliged me. “I’m twenty-four, why?”

“I’m thirty-eight, approaching twice your age, what’s the point of asking me this question?”

Her eyes widened. “I thought you were at least in your fifties!”

I looked at her warily. “That would make me old enough to be your father, are you sure you should be asking me?”

She grinned at me. “Who better to ask than those with the most experience?”

“But I don’t have that much experience in this topic.”

She huffed. “That was sarcasm you idiot!”

I rubbed the bridge of my nose. “Oh, so it’s the ‘I’m wrong so I’ll say I was kidding’ act.”

The veins on her forehead bulged. “How about I show my sincerity by ripping your head off?!”

I stopped and pointed up at the ceiling. “When we were above ground, you kicked through stone and caused the collapse of an outcropping; who’s to say that a fight down here won’t bring however much stone is between here and there on top of our heads?”

She clicked her tongue in frustration and acquiescence of the point.

A couple minutes later, Ami asked me another iteration of the question. “Isn’t it important to know yourself? Why don’t we just… check to see… if you’re gay or not?”

I sighed.

I suppose this is what mother meant by not telling things about yourself to strangers.