Mmmmmmhhhh!!!!
Eris moans happily, hugging her cheek with one hand, eyes closed in pure bliss, clearly enjoying her portion of Schleimfisch.
But me?
“EUGHHHHH!!!!”
Just one whiff and I feel my stomach somersault. What kind of unholy abomination is this?!
The dish before me is… beyond horrific. It’s literally rotten fish inards, mixed with something slimy and mucousy to end up looking like a giant booger, then topped off with a pungent fishy brine so strong it feels like it could melt the lining of my nose! The texture? A full-blown nightmare—glistening with a gross, wet sheen, jiggling like it’s alive, its gelatinous mass slopping off the spoon in slow-motion, as if it’s plotting to escape!
And yet… Eris and the other catgirls around me are devouring it like it’s some gourmet delicacy! Some are eating it with rice, others just spooning it into their mouths straight up!
I don’t understand.
How… ?
How is this possible?!
I glance down at my own bowl of Schleimfisch rice, dread pooling in my stomach. Every time I move the spoon, the Schleimfisch makes this sticky, slopping sound that’s downright nauseating. Imagine natto, but more slime. Why am I doing this to myself? I don’t even know. I remember not even surviving my first bite of natto back on Earth, and now I’m staring down this culinary nightmare.
“Huhuuuu…” I whimper, my lower lip trembling. “Erissss… I can’t…”
But Eris just beams at me, completely unfazed. “Huh? Why? Just take a bite! You’ll like it!”
“Yeah! You’ll like it!” The other catgirls chime in, their eyes wide and eager.
And now… ALL of their eyes are on me.
Ahhhh…
I’m so fucked.
Damn it!
How did I even get here?!
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On one hand, I don’t want to die.
But on the other hand… if I don’t eat this, they’re going to revoke my catgirl membership! I’ll be labeled a fraud—a catgirl imposter!
I stare down at the wobbly, jelly-like fish on my spoon. It jiggles ominously, like it’s daring me to eat it.
Alright!
I steel myself, because I’ve decided.
Even if it kills me, I’ll do it for the catgirls!
Thus, my hand is literally trembling as I scoop up a tiny, pathetic amount—barely a teaspoon’s worth. I brace myself for death.
“Felicia! You got this!” Eris cheers, her eyes sparkling. She pinches her nose and grins. “If the smell’s too much, just block it like this!”
Alright… that might help! Maybe.
I follow her lead, pinching my nose tightly with one hand while my other hand, shaking like a leaf in a storm, shovels the spoon into my mouth. The moment the Schleimfisch hits my tongue, I freeze.
Ahhh….
It was a mistake….
I want to cry so bad now.
The texture is beyond comprehension—slimy, slippery, and clinging to every corner of my mouth like an alien life form. And the flavor… salty, too salty, like I just took a mouthful of the ocean.
But then… something changes.
In just seconds, my taste buds adjust magically.
The saltiness is gone, replaced by umami goodness.
“…Oh damn!!!” I exclaim, eyes wide with surprise.
It’s… it’s…
“It’s not bad!” I blink, shocked by the words coming out of my mouth. “Actually… it’s kinda… good???”
“See? I told you!” Eris grins, looking smug.
“YAAAAAYYYY!” The other catgirls burst into applause, cheering like I just performed some kind of heroic feat.
But still… I’m soooo confused!
Am I tripping or something?
I take a whiff again.
Yup, the smell is still… EUGHHHH!
The texture is nightmare fuel.
But the taste? The taste is soooooooo good it somehow overrides all the grossness!
Thus, I take another spoon with sleimfisch and rice.
EUGHHH!
I gag again.
But as soon as I put it into my mouth…
Mmmhhhhm!!!!!
My body trembling in pleasure!
It’s sooo good!
SOOGOOODDD!!!
I- I…
I just can’t stop eating!!!!
Nomnomnomnom!!!
Euughhhh!!!
I’m basically gagging and stuffing my face at the same time!
This is ridiculous!!!
How can this be?
The most nasty-tasty food ever!
————-
And just like that, in no time at all, my bowl is empty, my spoon clattering against the bottom.
“WOOOO!! That was something!!!” I gasp, still shaking from the experience. Sweat drips down my forehead like I’ve just woken up from a horrifying nightmare. I can’t believe I actually survived that dish.
So that was Schleimfisch, the legendary catgirl food! Definitely an acquired taste!
I sit back, wiping the sweat from my brow. Now that I think about it… it reminds me of something from Earth.
Ah, stinky tofu!
I tried it once, and the smell still haunts me to this day. They say the worse it smells, the better it tastes.
But this? The smell is 10 times worse than stinky tofu!
With that out of the way, we say goodbye to the catgirls and catdudes and continue our morning search for more delicious food.
I keep trying other dishes, like kebabs and wings. But after eating that Schleimfisch… everything else tastes bland in comparison.
“Hehe, that’s the side effect! It just shows how awesome Schleimfisch is!” Eris beams.
“Eeeeehhh….” I groan.
I don’t even know if I want to try this dish again… but at least it’s an experience I’ll never forget.