Humming quietly, Kyle worked on correcting the quizzes his Early American History class had taken that morning. Years after Ryka’s last major appearance - by this point, he hardly counted the occasional classroom drop-in - he still had some of the most attentive and hard-working students in school. And it showed in their grades. He was circling his third “100” in a row when a low rumbling noise distracted him. Thinking it was only Ryka’s snoring, he ignored it and flipped to the next quiz sheet. But the sound grew louder, and with an annoyed sigh, Kyle threw down his pen.

“Can’t you at least sleep quietly?”

What are you talking about?

Before Kyle could ask Ryka the same question, he noticed movement out of the corner of his eye. Heart pounding, he turned to look at the wall next to him.

The shadow was there, pupil-less red eyes alight. His own eyes bulging, Kyle watched as the shadow stretched its long pointed fingers off the wall, across the floor, and up the table legs. Just as the first claw tip crept onto the tabletop, Kyle flinched away.

And his chair went over backwards. There was a loud “crack” as he landed, but he couldn’t be sure if it was his head hitting the floor or his teeth smashing together. For a few moments, he couldn’t hear anything, but then Ryka’s cackling broke the silence. That was fucking awesome.

“Glad you think so,” Kyle retorted, an unsettling metallic taste in his mouth. He managed to sit up, and spit into his hand. A considerable amount of blood was pooled in his palm, along with two teeth. His tongue easily found the gaps they had previously occupied. “Fuck!”

Calm down. I’ll grow them back for you. And fix your head, too.

Kyle realized just how hard he’d landed when he peered over his shoulder to see more blood on the floor. Only then did he feel it trickling down the back of his neck and under his shirt collar. Clutching his teeth, and gritting the ones remaining in his mouth, he struggled to his feet and righted the chair.

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Next to him, the shadow – which had retreated entirely to the wall – watched, looking ashamed. You hurt his feelings, asshole.

“His feelings? I lost two teeth and cracked my head open!”

He just wanted to see what you were doing.

“Correcting; the same thing I do every school night.”

And he wanted your pen.

The shadow, it turned out, had a penchant for thievery. Given the opportunity, it would eagerly ingest household items, small or large. Kyle hadn’t been aware of the shadow’s interest in mortal souvenirs until, after a fruitless search for a missing shoe, Ryka had finally informed him the shadow had swallowed it. Something it had done without Kyle even noticing, popping up unfelt and unseen, and committing the theft when Kyle’s back was turned.

As with souls, everything it consumed wound up in Hell. Somewhere, the shadow was amassing a hoard of artifacts from the mortal world. And Kyle was dumbfounded by its choices. Aside from a left loafer, it had swallowed a coaster, two dead batteries, a butter knife, and a pair of socks. Attempts had been made at the TV, but Ryka had quickly dealt with those.

Now that Kyle was wise to its antics, it requested items. Though Kyle almost wished it had stuck to covertly pilfering them; the shadow’s sudden appearances usually left him on edge. He wasn’t its host, and he had a strong suspicion it was bending the rules as much as Ryka was.

Exasperated, Kyle picked up the red felt tip pen with his free hand and showed it to the portal. “You like this?”

It nodded eagerly and opened its mouth. Kyle squinted into the overwhelming heat and light, and let go of the pen. It disappeared into Hell, and the shadow closed its mouth, looking satisfied. “Oh, for the love of … someone.”

Purring, the shadow vanished completely. And Kyle was allowed to return to the issue at hand. “So, how about my teeth? And the very likely head trauma?”

You know the drill.

Kyle stripped to his underwear, and Ryka took control of their body. “See, no problem.” He moved in front of the mirror and smiled, showing off a complete set of razor-sharp teeth.

This is why I never get any work done.

“You saying you want this body back?”

Yes.

“Cigarette first.”

Fine. Then I need to finish those quizzes. No interruptions this time. From anyone.

Ryka reluctantly conceded, and Kyle wondered what that whole “peace and quiet” thing he’d heard about was like.