His body may have been tucked in bed all night, but Kyle hadn’t actually slept a wink. All he could hope was that he had been quiet enough that the others in the house had been able to do so. Sore and still sleepy, he sat up, rubbing his eyes. In his dreams, he had been in his own bed, and it was strange waking up in an unfamiliar room.

Not sure he really wanted to know, but unable to stop himself, he looked at the clock on the bedside table. Seven a.m. Grimacing, Kyle threw back the sheets, or tried to. “Shit,” he mumbled, his own voice almost too loud. Now, on top of being exhausted, he was also dreadfully embarrassed. But he was sure no one else would be awake, and took advantage of the fact to shower and start a load of laundry.

What are you doing? Ryka asked, sounding nearly as groggy as Kyle felt.

“What does it look like? And it’s your fault, you know.”

Sorry. But did you really want me to hold back?

“Uh, well ….”

That’s what I thought.

As soon as the sheets were in the dryer, Kyle headed outside. Though that forced him to pass the wreckage of Dan’s grill. “No steaks, I guess,” he remarked, hoping to make Ryka feel guilty. He failed.

Who says I need it cooked first? The bloodier the better.

“Vampire,” Kyle said, sitting down carefully on the edge of the pool and letting his feet hang into the cool water.

Where do you think those myths came from?

“Should’ve known.”

For a quarter of an hour, neither of them spoke. Kyle was content just listening to the birds sing. But his peace never lasted.

Your ass hurt?

“What?” He didn’t need to see his reflection to know he was bright red.

You’re fidgeting. So, does it?

“Again, whose fault is that?” he returned, peeved. The dreams Ryka created for him felt incredibly real. Sometimes, he wished they felt a little less so. And Ryka hadn’t been exaggerating - he’d had no nice left in him last night. It was a week’s worth of frustrations he’d taken out on all-too-willing Kyle.

I can help.

As much as he wanted to spit back a bitter, “You’ve done enough,” it really would be pleasant not to feel the way he did. But he knew Ryka had ulterior motives as well. “You want to go in the pool that badly?”

Yes, came the immediate reply.

Stifling a laugh, Kyle stood and - with a quick glance back at the house to make sure he wasn’t about to give anyone a free show - stripped.

True to form, Ryka showed absolutely no restraint and cannonballed into the pool. He resurfaced, shaking water from his hair and wings. “Thanks, stud.”

Enjoy it while you can. You’ve said there’s no real water in Hell.

“Aside from a fountain at Lord Satan’s palace, it’s just Styx, and he’d rather not be used for swimming.”

The explanation came much easier than facts about his home usually did. Testament to how little Ryka enjoyed the subject, he even blatantly ignored Kyle’s loudest, most direct thoughts regarding Hell. It was hard to catch Ryka in this relaxed a mood, and Kyle felt he wasn’t likely to get another good shot anytime soon.

Finally voicing the question he had been stewing over for the last week, Kyle asked, When you were talking to Pike, he said something about Judas, and there being ‘something to consider.’ What was that all about? As though he could hide from the question, Ryka sank back under water, settling cross-legged on the bottom of the pool for a full minute before slowly rising back to the surface. So you have been avoiding this. Why?

There was a long sigh, and finally a response. “I didn’t want to get your hopes up. Or mine. Though ….”

What do you mean?

“There’s technically a way to avoid damnation. To cheat the system.”

Much like it had a week earlier at the bar, Kyle’s mind went blank. His brain was trying to process Ryka’s words and shorting out. What he was saying couldn’t be true, could it? He didn’t have to burn? Cheat? How?

“It’s only happened once. Under very … particular circumstances.” Somehow, Ryka almost sounded nauseated.

Judas, Pike said. The Judas? Like, from th… that book? Remembering how much it had hurt the last time he’d said the name of that particular publication, Kyle chose his words carefully.

“Yup. Judas the Betrayer. Saved from an eternity of suffering because the Devil wanted to bone him.”

I’m sorry. What? Somehow, the second half of that statement was more shocking than the first.

“Judas is in Hell, but he’s not one of the damned. He was given an immortal body; he’s a demon now. Because the Devil-”

Wanted to bone him?

“That’s it.”

Can you possibly give me more of an explanation than that? On the whole thing.

Ryka leaned back, letting himself float out to the middle of the pool. He’d gotten used to the sun of the mortal world, and understood now why mortals felt so safe in the daylight. Unpleasant things seemed less so when they didn’t happen in the dark. Conversations included.

“That book was right about some things, and really fucking wrong about others.” This, Kyle knew, was the case with every religion. Misinterpretation and misunderstanding were commonplace, even when the information came right from the gods’ mouths. “For one, that carpenter-turned-cult-leader was a regular mortal. The only immaculate thing about him was his soul. It was incorruptible - sin couldn’t touch him. And that’s a rare thing. Rare enough that Heaven felt the need to investigate.

“They sent two angels down to keep an eye on him. Immortals have been fucking with your species since you first went bipedal, but this was a little different. The angels didn’t keep their distance. Or their mouths shut. The carpenter learned things he wasn’t supposed to.”

Unauthorized reproduction: this story has been taken without approval. Report sightings.

It was tempting to ask what sorts of things, but wasn’t Kyle privy to more of the truth than most mortals could ever even guess at? So he answered only with, Oh.

A chuckle from Ryka meant his intentions were obvious, but Ryka pressed on. “The carpenter had a few close friends before those angels moved in, though. The closest of those were the woman who somehow ended up with the name Mary Magdalene, and Judas Iscariot. And I say close because they both wanted him, had a fucked up little love triangle. He refused to choose,though, which really pissed Judas off. You can probably guess who started the rumor Mary was a whore ….

“For the most part, Judas kept his anger to himself. But all the fuss going on around the carpenter - supposed miracles, talk of what happens after death, the drama with the Romans - attracted Lord Satan’s attention, too. Of course he noticed the bitter man seething at the carpenter’s side. Too in love with him to leave, even when it started getting dangerous.”

Ryka fanned his wings out, letting them skim over the water’s surface. Kyle had memories of the warmth of sunlight on skin, and with their shared nerves, Ryka could almost feel the sensation his host so fondly remembered. Almost.

Ry?

“Sorry. But since Heaven had chosen to get involved, it was only fair Hell do the same. Lord Satan could have sent anyone, but he chose to go himself. Insinuate himself with the carpenter’s friends. Fucker chose Judas. He was the easier target, all twisted up in his feelings. But Lord Satan had feelings of his own. And he wanted to guarantee he was the one who ended up with Judas’s soul, that he could keep him forever.” It sounded all too familiar to Kyle.

How’d he do it, then? Win Judas over?

“Probably the same way I got you: persistence.” Trying to imagine the Devil pursuing a mortal - Judas Iscariot, no less - made Kyle’s head spin. “But if you’re wondering how he got his soul, that part I can explain. He told Judas that the carpenter was going to get them all locked up. Or worse, killed. That probably wasn’t even a lie. And it would have been all of his friends and followers - every last one would have sacrificed themselves for the carpenter.

“Judas would have, too. But Lord Satan suggested another way: turn his friend in. Give the authorities what they wanted without any hassle, and maybe they’d go easy on him.”

Oh no.

“Oh yes. Judas did it. He may as well have nailed his friend to that cross himself. And he knew it. Assumed he’d be next. Someone would take revenge, and he’d be next. That he’d pay for what he’d done, then and forever.”

Ryka let himself sink for a moment, dropping to the bottom of the pool before resurfacing. His wings fanned open, flame licking the membrane exposed to air. Fog was starting to rise around him, and Kyle could only imagine what number the thermometer bobbing near the ladder now showed. Ryka didn’t like having this conversation, and was trying to literally burn off some steam.

What happened after the crucifixion, then?

“To Judas? He killed himself. Lord Satan had by then admitted who he was, and promised to keep Judas safe. Yes, he’d be going to Hell. Heaven would reject his soul, and it couldn’t just linger in Purgatory. But he was told he’d be saved from suffering if he returned with Lord Satan right then. And that meant suicide.

“So he did it. Whether he believed Lord Satan or not, he was damned either way. And doing the deed himself was quicker than rotting on a cross.”

Would Kyle be able to do the same, if it came down to it? With that kind of promise, he thought maybe he could.

“It won’t come to that,” Ryka assured him. “But I hope we can get the same result: reincarnation.”

That doesn’t mean what we think it does, does it?

“No. Your soul gets another chance, but not in Purgatory. You’re remade as an angel or demon. The carpenter got the former. Judas the latter. Which ended up balancing out, I guess, but Lord Satan was going to do whatever the fuck he wanted regardless. And he wanted Judas. So now that arrogant prick stands next to the Devil’s throne.” Several more grumbled insults followed, eventually flowing out in Hell’s language, which Kyle suspected had more creative ways to describe how much you despised someone.

Kyle cut his tirade short. But you think …. It seemed too much to actually finish the thought. That if he did, he’d somehow jinx it.

“I do.” There was certainly more he wanted to say, but instead sighed and glared back toward the house. “They’re starting to wake up.”

I’d like to go back inside, please. Somehow, even as a passenger, his voice was shaking.

Ryka complied without argument, and this time made sure Kyle didn’t faceplant onto the patio. Covering himself as best he could with his discarded clothes, Kyle scurried back into the house. Once he was dried and dressed, he shut himself in the laundry room. The dryer finished just as he entered, and without checking the sheets, he turned it back on. He needed the background the noise.

“You really think it’s a possibility? Reincarnation?”

Mm hmm.

“But-”

‘But’ what? We’ve made it far longer than anyone else in this situation, and we’re just getting started. And you’re getting so much better at this.

Almost afraid to ask, Kyle still managed to. “How do you mean?”

Think about how you felt the first time I hurt someone. The first time I took a soul. Kyle could easily remember those feelings - terror, helplessness, guilt. Do you still feel them now? His hesitation gave Ryka all the answer he needed. You don’t. Because you know they deserve it. If we keep this up, you’ll be more demon than damned by the time we get back to Hell. A perfect candidate for a second chance.

Ryka’s explanation shocked Kyle. He had never considered himself a cruel person. Why else would he have wanted to become a teacher, if not for the benefit of others? But Ryka’s words rang true. The first time he had summoned the demon to intervene on his behalf, the guilt had gnawed at him for weeks. Now he hardly cared, as long as his problem was solved and no one he truly cared about was hurt.

But that still seemed a far stretch from becoming what Ryka was. “I don’t think-” The words died in his throat, though, when he thought of an eternity without his other half. Because that was what he feared the most, it was almost guaranteed to be his punishment. And nothing could be worse than that.

You okay, stud?

Kyle tried to say “yes,” but instead found himself hunched over the dryer, eyes burning and jaw clenched tight.

Master?

“What if it doesn’t happen, though?”

It will. If he’d had doubts before, they were gone. This needed to happen. There was no other way. I’ll make sure you don’t suffer, Master. Just like I do now. I’ll do whatever it takes. I’ll beg Lord Satan to reward you like he did Judas. I’ll give up my own immortality if I have to. So you don’t have to burn.

Upon hearing that, the tears began falling in earnest. The thought of Ryka prostrate before anyone was almost inconceivable, never mind him giving up the very essence of his being for Kyle. “Ry, no, how can you say that?”

Because I love you, Master. All I want is your happiness.

“Then don’t talk about leaving me,” Kyle practically shouted, realizing too late there were still people trying to sleep in the house. Much more quietly, he said, “I love you, too, so don’t do anything that would keep us apart. You promised me forever, right?”

Yes, Master. I did, and I meant it. So please stop crying. They’re going to think I’m being mean to you.

His sobbing subsided to sniffles, and Kyle turned around to lean back against the dryer. “Anything but, Ryka.”

Good. I just want you not to worry. You never say it, but you think about it a lot.

“I’m sorry. I feel better now. I trust you.”

Kyle could tell Ryka was satisfied with his answer. Enough so that he could completely change the subject. You should stay tonight with everyone else.

“Are you sure?” The bachelor party had been planned to last the entire weekend, but Kyle hadn’t really expected that Ryka would want him to stay the whole time. After the previous night, he also hadn’t expected he’d outstayed his welcome.

I need to sleep. At least this way you’ll have some company. Though if they fuck up again, I’ll be inviting myself back.

“They won’t.” Some of his students had been foolish enough to rouse the demon’s anger on more than one occasion, but he suspected this group would be a lot smarter. He fervently hoped so, anyhow.

We’ll see. But if you desperately need my company, feel free to wake me.

“I’ll be fine.” Ryka snorted, obviously disappointed Kyle wouldn’t be soliciting his services. “We’ve got plenty of time for that later, right?” Optimism felt risky, but it was nice change of pace. One he thought he could get used to.

You’re right, stud. Plenty of time. Now don’t forget to have a few drinks for me.