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Before The Lily Falls
Chapter Six - The Selfish

Chapter Six - The Selfish

Jacob was convinced; his sister hated him, and little did he know, she was just trying to protect him. She knew the kind of man Jacob was. Tammy protected him as long as she could, but he was grown now, there was nothing she could do but warn him. She felt a strong tension in her shoulder for the boy. Even when she worked, Jacob never left her mind. If she didn't warn him what kind of sister would she be? The red flags were as bright as day, why couldn't he see? Tammy thought about it- Lily could very well be a lost cause- People like that don't get fixed easily. She knew that but did Jacob? He was sure this time. Sure of it. More than anything. It was fast, yes of course, but Jacob knew that he needed to do something. Lily was on her feet again, barely but that was enough for him. Tammy told him how selfish this was, and how hard it would be to get little or any emotion out of that girl.

"What are you looking for?" She got home but to her surprise, Jacob arrived early and was tumbling through their old chest of family treasures, like albums and letters and even his mother's wedding dress still white and soft as cotton.

"Mum's necklace. I can't find it." He flipped through some parchment and opened boxes, where he happened upon a beautiful hairpin. It was gold and three flowers where a lovely white pearl sat in each. Jacob could remember his mother wearing it once at a Sunday service. He felt the imprint and then flipped it over to the back. To Evelyn

"It was your grandmother's. She gave it to Clint who gave it to your mother. It took Evelyn three years before she accepted Marinette into the family and when she did, they got married, finally, with her blessings."

He placed the pin back into the box like it was a newborn being put in its crib for the first time.

By then, Tammy got to the wall where a few pictures were kept.

"Why do you want the necklace? If you're taking that out then you must've found the right girl to give it to this time."

He stopped, he felt like the odds were against him again. Something was telling him not to do this, someone, maybe it was just Tammy.

"Who is this lucky girl anyway?" She grabbed a little brown box from the top shelf, cupping it in her hands before opening it.

"Lily."

"Lily?" She closed it. "Does she feel the same about you?" Tammy began to relax her shoulders as she turned around.

"Does it matter?" A picture caught his attention, he picked it up. "Does your nephew not deserve happiness?"

"That's not what I'm saying, Jacob." She sat down on the floor beside him, opened his hands and placed the box in it. "It could take years for that girl to be okay again. You of all people should know that but if you're sure about this-"

"I am." He nodded, He finally looked at her. She believed in Jacob, she know he'd do the right thing, as he always does.

"If you're sure about this, you need to remember there are a sundry of ways this can end."

That morning, Jacob decided to walk to Lily's house. He was sure he would do this but he needed time to think about his reaction if she said no. He felt for the box and it was there, he shook his head throwing aside any curls from the front of his face but one lock just wouldn't let up. It fell right at the center of his forehead, it was the strands from his widow's peak. He wondered if he was good enough- Jacob, the baker- he hadn't achieved anything in life. It wasn't that he didn't want to, Jacob realized that every opportunity isn't meant to be taken. He wanted to achieve something, even before he got old. He was contented with the work he did, he didn't even use any money. It was Tammy, he didn't have to work but for her, he would. Just to keep things smooth and running. He didn't want her to look after him until he died and he certainly didn't want to be of no use when a rainy day came.

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He went to the door and gave a single knock. He looked around, pacing the porch until it opened.

"Jacob. I didn't expect you." Lily calmly cuffed her arms.

The first thing he noticed was the bag she held.

"I came to talk to you but… I’m sorry to ask, but are you going somewhere?."

"I'm sorry I didn't get the chance to tell you when you brought me home on Friday." She felt like a clown, she couldn't look him in the eye once. She knew this would happen, she'd feel guilty. "And a conversation would be nice." She dropped her knees a bit, resting the case by the door.

There was a washed-out bench, right of the door, where they sat. Jacob didn't know how to feel, he leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees. Lily thought he was just frustrated from work by the way he rubbed his face and his hair.

"I'll start then." She sat up, rubbing her palms on her skirt. "I'm going to live in the Beckingham manor for a while."

"What about the house?"

"I'll lock it up." She swallowed her pride and took a deep breath, turning to him. "I just wanted to thank you for all you've done for me. I never said it before but I-"

"It's okay, Lily. I know how you feel. "

"You don't." She stated. "You pity me, Jacob."

"You couldn't be further from the truth." He jumped up.

"The truth?" She followed him as he marched around. “What is the truth?”

He felt for the box, it was there. His heart raced and his hand gripped it tightly. He was going to do it, he was going to take it out and tell her.

"The truth is-"

It seemed like a coincidence that William just got there, maybe it was the Universe saying it wasn't the right time. If Tammy and the Universe both knew it wasn't right then it would be two against one. There was no way, Jacob could outnumber them for he only had himself.

Lily could see William wave his hand out to her as he got out. She quickly took her bag, locked the door and walked to the edge of the porch.

"I have to go."

Jacob's words stopped her from taking another step. "This is the most we've talked, it's sad that it had to be like this, huh?"

"It is." She said, air slowly leaving her half-closed mouth as she hurried to the car.

Jacob leaned on the rails, watching them leave. He couldn't remember how or when he got to the ol' brewery. It was alive, happy, and dancing but he wasn't. He couldn't share that happiness with anyone. The only thing he had was pain and the only thing he could share that with was his drink.

"I don't know whether you're having a bad day or if that's your just face, mister?"

"It's just my face." He bore a scowl for a face when he curled his lips.

"And I'm just Taylor." She stretched her hand out.

Jacob gave her his hand, staring into the hazel eyes that gleamed at him. "Jacob."