Epilogue

Dearest Willow,

It has been over a year since we lost you and even now your loss aches in my chest. Elijah says when he was younger, he used to write letters to relatives who had gone on ahead and it helped him get through his grief, so now I am trying this method for myself. This is the first time in our lives, one of us has gone somewhere the other could not and I find myself unsure and unsteady in myself. Never before have I been without your calm, steady presence. Either way, if you somehow can see this letter from beyond the Stream, I’m sure you would appreciate the update. And if not, then I at least got to feel like I was talking to you again.

I guess I’ll start with saying that everyone is doing as well as can be expected. Your family have been distant, which I expected. You all always seemed so close and I'm sure your sudden loss affected them greatly. They have only recently started re-joining society, although your mother and father still seem greatly affected. I have as yet not had a chance to speak at any great length with them, they always have somewhere they need to be when I happen across them. Siobhan seems, forgive me, angry and I wonder if she’s angry with you for leaving this world. I’ve heard it's a common part of grief: to be angry. I only hope she will grow from it. I remember what she was like after Brendan passed on and I don’t think your parents could handle losing her too.

Jay-jay has been a mess, I’m sorry to tell you, but I expect you may have been shocked if he hadn’t been. He has lent heavily on his friends, who had to pull him away from a grief-stricken brawl with your father. He’s accused your father in the politest ways possible of not doing enough. I hear there was an argument about it although I was not privy to the substance of the matter. It was Elijah who heard the rumour from a friend. I have not seen Jay-jay, and he has not been to work in some time from what I hear. I tried to call, but he hasn’t been up for visitors. His mother is worried, but I don’t know what else to do.

I will continue to try and reach out. We all need each other in these times and the more friends one has the more ways everyone has to share the burdens of loss we have. None knew that better than you and now I found the wisdom in the words that once I had not.

Richard brought me the gift you had aside for me for the Long Nights and I must confess it has been more useful than I think even you knew it would be. I have almost begun to fill your shoes, although I can only make the simplest of medicines. I had no idea you knew how to craft paper, let alone a book. But I learn every day from a rumour or an overheard conversation that you had many talents and pursuits. Some were so honourable that you would have been respected far more than you were as a Healer if others had known.

Maybe that is why you never told anyone, not even me. You never did things for the recognition, you always did them for the good of others. It was something I always…

-

I had to put this letter aside for a time as I was not able to write for some time. It has been some months since I first took up my pen to start this letter. Fresh pain has joined the agony of your loss and neither pain has dulled in that time. You would I think understand in ways even I do not, that sense of loss.

I was attacked some time ago. I was pregnant. I am no longer. It breaks my heart every day knowing the loss of that little one. Elijah has not taken it well and some days I feel like I lost both my child and my husband. His friends have been of great help and many women who knew you have come to keep me company. They say it is the least they could do for the closest friend of a women who had done so much. Well, they didn’t say friend, they said sister, but you know what I mean.

The loss has been hard, especially so soon after losing you and my uncle so recently. You always said trouble comes in threes. I just did not realise the trouble that was going to befall me.

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Your loss still affects us. So, I hope you don’t mind that I Sent him off on the same spot I farewelled you. I hope you find him. Love him for me, will you? Look after him until I can be there with him. But it is not yet my time, I still have time left in my life and I will not sully my uncle you or that little babe by cutting it before the stream calls me.

I will see you, both of you, again one day, but not for a long time yet and when I do, I’ll tell you all.

Until then and with all my love,

Olivia

#

This simple, heartfelt letter had travelled far.

When Richard, Esther and Siobhan had visited some months after the attack to offer their quiet support and reaffirm their condolences, Olivia had pressed the sealed note into their hands, begging them to place it with Willow’s marker in the family lot, alongside her brother. They had agreed helplessly, knowing no such marker existed.

The whole family had avoided Olivia, knowing that the grief they saw on her face was of their doing, that Willow was gone because of them; they hadn’t known how to console the young women. They’d barely been able to reconcile amongst themselves. After the loss of her child these feelings of guilt had intensified, so when this request was made, how could they refuse?

Esther and Richard had debated for days, Siobhan had refused to be brought into the conversation beyond refusing to break the seal. Should they hold on to it and hope they see her again, or try to have it put into Willow’s hands? Eventually, Richard reached out to Edward. Things had been difficult for them after the compound had been attacked, let alone the falsehoods that had been told to get Willow there. The Resistance had welcomed an elf temporarily amongst their number into their new home. She’d agreed to both close the original portals in the burnt-out compound and reattach the old lines to a single new portal.

While still miffed with Richard, he’d agreed to attempt to find a way to contact Willow to see about getting the note to her. Privately, Edward hoped a direct line could be managed so he may monitor his son, but others quickly corrected his line of thinking.

Surprisingly, it had been Agnes, slowly recovering from within her cocoon of bandages, that had gently reminded him of the fixed nature of the portals. Jonathon had laughed at Edward's surprise, commenting that no one ever expected her to know so much about such obscure things.

However, they find a way to contact Willow. It just so happened that Neldin was the elf passing through, helping with the portals and in tow was Nianti. She had overheard Edward’s conversation with Agnes and offered to lend some magical support. When she explained the incident back in Tanut more than a full set of seasons ago, she also added on to the tale something she had not realised at the time: Willow’s magic had left an imprint on her. It was something she had yet to work out how to remove; the magic had proven stickier than honey. However, this meant that anywhere in Amdas, with a little support, Nianti should be able to contact Willow through the imprint. She warned it was not a strong one, no conversation would be possible as it wasn’t that kind of bond, but the simple delivery of the letter was doable.

Richard had agreed and sent the letter along and Nianti, with Neldin’s magical support, was able to transport the letter to Willow’s location. Along with it, the group had attached a smaller note, explaining the sudden appearance. Each person involved had signed the note, letting her know just how many people it had taken to get this very simple note into her hands.

So, when Willow, one day, went to her pack looking for something or other she found the letter’s she hadn’t expected and, upon seeing the names listed within, had promptly burst into tears, crumpling into the dirt. Felix had been terrified of the uncharacteristic outburst, but she had waived him off. He’d been desperately curious, made worse when she refused to even show him the item cupped in her hands. But Felix knew better than to pry and quickly retreated before she grew angry.

Once Willow felt composed enough, the tears having slowed and hiccups all that remained; she had finally opened Olivia’s letter with shaky hands and, upon reading her happy news, promptly burst into fresh tears.

Willow did her best to finish the letter. Experimentally, she reached out for the residual magic Nianti had left behind and tried projecting her gratitude back along the link.

#

In the Southern Camp, Nianti smiled softly. After the horrendous night of the prophecy, she had felt guilty for the burden she’d placed on the young women, had regretted the intrusions and decisions that had been made for her because of the vision. To know that she had brought some kind of joy to her lifted her heavy heart some.

For that one moment, one sparkling surreal moment, that letter had passed through the hands of everyone she cared about and had brought them all together across the great spaces that separated them, the many heavy decisions that split them.

And for that Willow was grateful.