William and John travelled back through the night for a couple of hours, stopping for a break at the foot of the next hill. The night air was crisp and fresh, a small breeze carried through it. The sky was filled with pinpricks of light. No light pollution made for the most glorious night views William had experienced. William sat down, head up in the stars. John hadn’t been catatonic any more, but he wasn’t really talking beyond one word answers. The man was clearly haunted by what happened. William knew he should have been affected more as well, thankful that he used violence to brush it off, for the most part.
As William beheld the stellar sky, the scene of the mother emerging from the flames flashed through his head. Who the fuck uses hostages as meat shields for their equipment stores? It made no sense. Actually, it made some sense. Who would burn down their enemy’s stuff if they would catch innocents in the crossfire? The only people willing to do such things wouldn’t be any better than the bandits.
William was drawn from his thoughts as John spoke, “What we doing?”
It was a question as deep as the night sky above them. William didn’t reply immediately, processing the question.
“We’re doing what we can. For our people, this mission was important. It’s fucked up how the bandits use hostages, but those people didn’t die in vain. We now know that other such places and people exist and can rescue hostages first going forward,” William finally said after a few long moments of consideration.
“Those people still died. I killed them.”
William let out a tired sigh before replying, “We. We killed killed them. So did Wallace. So did the bandits. The end result was dead innocents. Who killed them is irrelevant. How far down that rabbit hole can we go? Did they kill themselves by getting captured? Did their families kill them by not protecting them in the first place? We were just the final nail in the coffin.”
“I...don’t know if I can think like that. I’m not strong like you.”
William laughed at that before he said, “I’m not that strong. I was shedding plenty of tears while fighting earlier. I was angry. I was sad. I stood my ground and put more of those fuckers in that very same ground. Almost everyone who dies leaves someone else behind. Resilience and strength are two different things. I would pick resilience over strength any day of the week. Maybe that’s the Dexterity focus of my stats talking, but strong and rigid things snap. Resilient and flexible things bend. Bends can be fixed easier than snaps. So...no, I’m not that strong, and don’t want that type of strength.”
William winced slightly at his analogy. It wasn’t the best, but he felt like it made a good point. It seemed to work slightly as a tiny fraction of colour returned to John’s bland and pale expression. It was still a work in progress, but any progress was good. William wanted John, and the rest to harden themselves at least a fraction more in this new world. They would need it if the past weeks had been any indication. He felt bad at the thought, with it not being fair to his people. His people. When did he truly see them as that? He had bled for them, but that was mainly for his family, later for his friends, now...for his people.
“To end another person’s life...all they had been and could become is brought to a stop when they’re killed. Is that not twisted in and of itself?” John asked, still fighting his emotions.
William understood the argument, but in his mind, the same rule would apply to him. The bandits sure as fuck didn’t give a shit about his life or future, so why should William care for theirs? He voiced that thought and John seemed to consider the words. William did, however, feel some redundancy to his statement as the people John wept for were robbed of their futures; by his and John’s own hands.
The two sat in silence for a long while, John lost in thought, William scanning the hill they had come from for any bandits. He had time to consider the logistics of the bandits. William anticipated the enemy force would need to have been near the burnt down store house, maybe a camp several miles north of it. If they rested until first light, they could be at the store house within an hour. Hopefully the sight would cause them to stop briefly giving Greenwell some extra breathing room. If the group of bandits was large, then William estimated maybe four or five hours of travel before they reached Greenwell. William was unsure of the time, but anticipated it to be the early hours of the morning. Twelve or so hours until the assault began. That was what he hoped. The event said 0 Days remaining.
“Coulda given an actual hourly or minutely countdown, but noooo.” William thought, mentally chastising the system. The group couldn’t be too big though, not with how many he had killed, but the sinking feeling returned as he considered his foe. He had to push the feeling away. Fretting would do no good. All they could do was fight and survive.
“The battle today...it’s gonna be rough...isn’t it? John said, looking up at William.
William considered lying to ease the concerned expression, but he had seen plenty of horror to know what their enemy was capable of.
“Yes. Honestly, I expect some of us will die,” William said matter of factly, making John reel in shock and then, concern.
“But...the defenses. We’ve trained hard. Really hard. You’ve done a number on the enemy force. Surely we can just wipe out the remaining enemies from safety.”
“The defenses. The training. It’s all been to reduce the number of deaths we took,” William replied.
It was never likely to be a flawless victory, but a victory where the majority lived was what he and Wallace had aimed for. William would be lying if he said that the few for the many was a worthy cause, but not when it came to his family and friends. He could handle the guilt of some members of Greenwell dying in battle, defending themselves, but not if it happened to someone he cherished. That was yet another thing rolling around in his mind, what did he cherish? Did he cherish his family themselves, or cherish the opportunity of a new and fresh start with them?
Too many thoughts to unpack and process. He was starting to understand what carrying a true mental weight felt like. They had to continue back the last stretch to Greenwell. They had already taken longer than intended processing the events of the night.
“Come on man, we need to get back and speak to Wallace,” William said, offering a hand up.
John looked at the hand and considered it for a brief moment before accepting it. The two resumed their walk and relief washed over William at the sight of Greenwell. He noticed John had a similar expression, with a sorrowful tinge on top of it.
“You okay to fight later?” William asked, already knowing that he wasn’t, but would feel bad if he didn’t ask.
“Do I have any choice?”
“Not really, no. You’re probably the second highest levelled in Greenwell. I need you to protect Jane and Stacey for me,” William replied, somewhat ashamed at having to ask that of his friend, but William would be preoccupied elsewhere and couldn’t do everything.
“Why aren’t you gonna be able?” John asked, seeming worried at William’s request.
“Because I’ll be acting as a one man army elsewhere in Greenwell,” It sounded cooler that way than standing around guarding a weak point.
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“I guess if anyone could do it, It would be you,” John replied, seeming to accept the answer.
“Will you look after them for me? Who knows, maybe you’ll even get some brownie points with Jane. Be the heroic prince charming or whatever.”
John seemed to brighten up at that, but suddenly frowned at William as he said, “Speaking of Jane, do you know how much of a handful your mother was after your stunt?”
William couldn’t help but grin as he replied, “You mean when your stunt backfired. So what did she say? You get a proper talking to?”
“If by proper, you mean her telling me that Jane could use a good man and hoped for grandchildren then yeah.”
William rocked back in shock.
“The fuck?”
“Right? I ain’t tying myself down with kids. Not in this place. Not until I feel it right to do so.”
“I dunno John, there isn’t exactly contraception in this world. Not that I know of anyway. Armine doesn’t know of any either. Maybe a fetus deletus spell or something exists.”
“Wait...then what about when you and them...you know.”
“I never really thought of it too much as Armine says the birth rate in the world is incredibly low. The main reason that populations are the size they are at present is due to the majority of people staying in cities and towns where it’s safer. Something about how bodies are formed in this world.”
John nodded at that, seeming satisfied until his eyes widened and he said, “We were brought here from Earth. Our bodies are still the same right?”
William didn’t see his point initially, answering, “I...don't think so? We can use magic right? That doesn’t seem like what we could do with our bodies on Earth.”
“No, all living things are capable of magic to some extent according to Devlin. He learned about it from a travelling mage once.”
“Then we aren’t any different, not really.”
John nodded before saying, “Exactly. Now, you and Stacey are both from Earth. You both have Earthen bodies.”
William realized it then, shock taking over. John didn’t need to elaborate further. William had fucked up.
“Oh no,” William said, hands now on his head as he started pacing.
“I guess Mary will be getting a little lamb sooner than expected,” John said, laughing at William’s mental crisis.
“Motherfucker. You’re enjoying this ain’t ya?”
“More than you know. I love karma.”
William just flipped him off, prompting more laughs from the man who had a lot more color in his expression. At least his misery helped John’s mental ailments.
“Remember man, we gotta go see Wallace,” John added, as he started walking down the hill to Greenwell.
“I’m a fucking idiot,” William muttered in a quiet curse, frustrated at his oversight.
He followed John, catching up to him quickly.
John had his mental battle to deal with, and William now had his. He couldn’t be a father yet, he was only nineteen. The two walked through the gate to a waiting Wallace who was leaning against the nearby hut wall, arms crossed, lost in thought.
"Yay! Distractions!" William mentally cheered.
The two approached and Wallace quickly ushered them to a distant part of the palisade, away from everyone in the huts. The three formed a small huddle.
“Welcome back lads, how’d it go?”
John and William looked at each other sadly and William explained the situation.
Wallace listened and trembled at the retelling William provided. When William had concluded, the older man leaned against the palisade, hands over his face, seemingly shook to the core. It took a minute for the man to regain some composure.
“I’m sorry, I put you both through that. War...war is hell, and I somehow forgot that. I’m sorry.”
William shrugged, more concerned that he might be a father in a nine months. He did notice John sag slightly, posture condensing down, guilt still a weight he couldn’t shift or lock away.
There was more silence for several long moments before William broke the quiet as he said, “How has that person acted today?”
John raised an eyebrow, but William smiled and shook his head, implying not to get involved.
“Right, time to get some sleep,” John said, with a yawn as he wandered away.
William took a moment for John to leave earshot before looking back to Wallace, who met his gaze and spoke up, “He’s been helping the others with the fence still. I’ll show you the patch that couldn’t be done on time, in a minute. Nothing suspicious though.”
William considered that for a moment before approaching one of the beams by their part of the palisade and he pulled on it. The wood didn’t budge in the slightest.
“Okay, it seems like no sabotage to the beams then,” William said, scanning the rest of the palisade for any tamper signs.
The wall seemed fine.
William approached Wallace again and said, “I feel like there’s something we’re missing.”
Wallace nodded, having come to the same conclusion it appeared. It meant extra work for William later that day.
“Show me where I’ll be guarding,” William added, looking at Wallace expectantly.
Wallace led him to the spot, which was a gap of ten feet in the wall. No support beams or the like, just vertical logs protruding from the ground. He would be positioned several feet away, ready to support others elsewhere or hold the gap if bandits try breaking through. The bandits shouldn’t be aware of the vulnerability, so if they break it quickly, William would get his answer.
“Are you alright, Lad?” Wallace asked, seeming concerned.
“I’m okay. Tonight was just another horror to add to the collection. Dunno about John though. He took it hard. Maybe I would have been affected more if I hadn’t put so many in the ground already.”
“Like I said, war’s hell. Today is the final battle against our enemy though, and come what may, we will win.”
“I told John about the true function of our training everyone. He seemed shocked, but I think he gets it. A few casualties is better than all of us.”
“Agreed, Lad. You should get home and rest up. I’m guessing your resources are low too?”
William nodded. Wallace pulled out a small satchel bag made from Lynx hide, one of the first products made from the creatures. He handed it to William who examined the contents. Inside were three of each type of potion.
“What?!” William said, surprised at the gift.
“Me and your parents gathered our starting potions up for you to use. This should keep you in the fight for a good while.”
The old veteran was absolutely correct. William emptied the contents into his Spatial Ring.
“Lucky bastard,” Wallace muttered with a small smile.
William would still rest and meditate to regain his resources, mainly MP. He burned through that particular resource quickly in most fights. William gave his thanks and headed home. He reached his shed and found Armine looking up at the stars outside.
“Fancied some stargazing?” William said, smiling at her.
She looked at him, surprised briefly, but composed herself.
“I was waiting for you. I wanted to talk,” She said, tapping her fingers on her knees in a fidget.
Those words weren’t ever a good sign. William walked over and sat down beside her on the grass.
Neither said anything for a pregnant moment until Armine spoke up, “I need to finish things between us.”
William’s heart lurched slightly at that. He had a hunch from the tone and how the we need to talk line always ended this way. It still hurt. He needed to know why. He didn’t expect her to change her mind with how blunt she made the declaration, so he needed to learn from it.
“Why? Did I piss you off somehow?” William said, some dejection evident.
“No, I just don’t see you enough. I know it won’t ever change with you wanting adventure, and I need to do what’s best for my future. I’ll also be leaving Greenwell once the fight is over. I need more to do.”
“Why did you get with me in the first place then?” William said, not able to hide the tone of frustration he was biting down.
She winced at the tone slightly, but seemed to finds the words she needed as she replied, “You were strong and attractive. That’s my type, specifically in the bedroom. I’ve yet to find someone like that who will stay with me for more than a day before going off on the next adventure. I’m not strong or a fighter. My place is in civilization, not the battlefield.”
“Not because of my boundless charisma and heroism?” William said, trying to lighten the mood, having accepted this outcome.
She smiled a little at that, but turned her face neutral before saying, “I’m a person of lustful intention, William. I want strong hands on me and to look into the face of a beautiful man who has their way with me. You do tick both of those boxes, but not the third. The one where I get to indulge my urges regularly. Stacey won’t do anything without you there either so no release for me.”
“Ah, she’s a nympho. That explains a lot.” William thought, seeing her in a new light. A sex obsessed beauty. The exact girl he fantasized about back on Earth. He should be elated and finding ways to spend most of his time with her, but he had other priorities now. He had people to protect, lands to explore, strength to gain. Even a settlement to grow. William suspected that having slept with two women and fulfilling multiple fantasies had curbed that horny teen libido. He wondered if that was where a boy truly became a man.
“I understand, and you’re right, I’m gonna keep exploring and fighting. If you want a constant partner this is probably for the best.”
She looked at him thoughtfully then glanced back to the shed and with a naughty grin said, “I don’t have to go right now. We can have some more fun before I leave. If you still want to?”
William did have biological urges and so he got to his feet, pulling Armine up with him. The pair walked to the shed and he caught a glimpse of Armine looking around seeming lost in thought briefly before she caught his gaze and smiled.
“Weird.” William thought, before opening the door to a waiting Stacey, stark naked on the bed. William had a feeling that he would be recharging SP as well as his MP afterwards.