The “talk” didn’t begin until a couple of minutes into their journey as the two strolled toward Greenwell. The air was awkward and almost palpable. To William, no challenge in the new world had been greater than what he was about to do.

A few more moments of uncertainty passed before William spoke up, “Mum, I’m...sorry that you had to see that.”

She looked up at him with barely contained sorrow, “As am I.”

“I don’t wanna kill...I just never get given a real choice between that or losing myself and others.”

His mother looked down at the ground, her body conveying the defeat in her soul.

With a sigh, she looked up at him after a pregnant moment, her face showing inner conflicts resolved, “It was...wrong of me to act as...harshly as I did. I just can’t stand seeing my sweet boy killing others. It breaks my heart. Even just then, with those four...people.”

The way the last word hung in the air gave William some long awaited clarity on the turmoil of his mother’s feelings.

“I get no joy from the taking of lives, Mum. I will admit, combat itself is fun, but the inevitable conclusion weighed on me for a while.”

More concern shone on his mother’s face, “for a while? As in...not any more?”

William returned a sad smile before closing his eyes and replying, “there’s still about twenty something bandits remaining if my count was correct. I don’t get the...luxury of letting my actions weigh me down when you, Dad, Jill, and everyone else is in mortal danger. I can deal with the burden after I know everyone’s safe.”

“You shouldn’t have to do that William, you aren’t even twenty yet.”

“by Earth standards, yes. Here, I think might makes right. Nothing I’ve seen here has indicated otherwise.”

His mother started to tear up, “What happened to my little William?” She said quietly, making William wonder if the question was for him.

“He’s still here. William never left.”

A somber smile appeared on her face, holding the culmination of relief and sorrow, “This world is terrible. You’ve escaped the shell you had built over the years only to have a mountain of corpses weigh on your soul.”

William chuckled mirthlessly, “it’s more of a small hill at the moment. Give it time.”

He looked out over the rolling hills, mentally picturing such a mountain, with him atop it, sword and board in hand. He felt excitement at the thought. Rationale returned to his mind. Concern overcame him in that moment. “What the fuck is wrong with me?” William thought, fearful of his future. Being responsible for such a feat would be nothing less than hellish. The physical weight of a landmark like that could be weighed, but what about the weight of each soul, pressing down upon William?

His words seemed to make his mother shiver.

“You aren’t the one who’ll bear the weight. That’s already my responsibility. Better to be good at it than not,” He stated, matter of factly.

“Why you?” His Mother said, some frustration welling up.

“That’s the question. Anyway, are you well Mum? Did they...do anything?” He asked, true concern readily apparent.

She looked at him with an expression of timidity before she quietly said, “They...didn’t get to that point,” Her building frustration overcome with both relief and concern, a less than graceful dance across her face.

He didn’t address the topic any more as his mother’s body language showed the discomfort at the topic. William decided to change the subject to their last conversation so many weeks ago.

“I’m...sorry. What I said when we spoke last was...wrong,” He said, with a sincerity that he had rarely used towards his mother over the years.

There was no reply, and William inwardly gave up, turning his head back the way they were walking.

Several minutes passed.

“Your father spoke to me about...everything,” his Mother finally replied, the pain in her voice a vast contrast to the sun bathed hills around the pair.

She continued, “I may have been...passionate about my beliefs. Perhaps too much so.”

William considered her for a moment, genuine shock in his mind. When was the last time she gave any ground in her zeal?

“I appreciate that. I won’t ever be a believer, and I don’t hate religion. I just see no merit in it personally.”

“Then why di-” His mother tried before William interrupted her.

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“I said what I did because I’m done with listening to religious doctrine. Nothing more.”

“but God….is absolute. The universe had to come from somewhere.”

Nope. He wasn’t getting dragged into that downward spiral of a conversation.

He let out a sigh, knowing what had to be done, “This world has a ranking system with three categories. The first category is cat-” He paused, as he saw his Mother flinch suddenly. William guessed that she had received the tutorial prompt he had also received when Devlin explained the same thing. The system apparently liked to interrupt people.

He let his Mother read the content while they walked. Several moments passed, a smile on his face. Once she realized the truth, she could move on and be happy. He heard a soft thud behind him. William turned, ready for combat, but was only met with the sight of his mother slumped on the ground, dejection written across her face as plain as the grass beneath their feet. This was not what he expected.

“But...my whole life. I spent years of my life praying. Confessing. Spreading the word of the lord. It’s all a lie? It’s not fair…” It was at this point, William knew, he fucked up.

“Mum...I...w-” He started, but didn’t get far before his mother interrupted him.

“My hope...its gone. What do I do now? If any random person can become a fucking god, then my beliefs have been completely wrong, my whole life,” The distraught woman said, tears treading down her cheeks.

William attempted to speak once again, but a raised hand gave him pause as his mother continued, “What do I do with my days now? Who do I follow? Who do I shepherd? Do I dare shepherd people in a world where godhood is a milestone?”

All were great questions that William couldn’t begin to answer. What did he even say to that?

William took a deep breath to prepare for what he would say, buying precious seconds.

“It’s your path. Your future. Your freedom,” William said, giving the best he could think up. It kind of made sense, and he hoped it would at least help somewhat.

“What path can I take? What’s in my future, our future?” William’s mother said with frustration that swiftly turned to sorrow, “What...freedom?”

William was lost. Words failed him completely. He never saw his mother like this and, it hurt him. They had their differences and disagreements, but she was still the person that birthed and raised him.

In the end, William just decided to say what came to mind as he spoke. He would wing it as he couldn’t think of the best reply anyway.

“Once we’re free from the bandits, we can go to other places, meet new people, explore our new world. We lost a stuffy concrete world and are now in a medieval style one.” He didn’t add his frustration at never being able to indulge in his video games or manga any more as that seemed pointless.

She sighed in defeat, still at a loss it seemed.

Several more moments passed as the midday sun beamed down on the pair.

“I couldn’t hurt anyone. The thought of myself stabbing or burning or doing whatever else to another person makes me feel sick,” She replied, looking back to the direction where the fight occurred.

William understood what she was getting at but the words still hurt. Did she think he also made her sick? He had to ask. He didn’t want to stew on that thought as it wouldn’t make any headway here.

“Do I...make you...feel sick then?” He asked, with a level of timidity that shocked him.

When had he last been this afraid? His mother also briefly widened her eyes at the comment, confirming that the surprise was a shared one. He was baffled as she seemed to glare at him before raising her voice, “William! I would never think you’re sick. You’re my darling boy.”

William failed wholeheartedly in his attempt to hide the heightened surprise that shook him to the core. It was also unfortunately, plain as day and the reaction made his mother’s face crumple.

“You genuinely thought I didn’t care about you,” She stated. It wasn’t even a question as the writing was there on the wall.

Some tears welled up in her eyes as she added, “I’m so sorry William. Your father warned me that this might be the case, but I didn’t believe it at first, but as the weeks passed by, I started to see the signs.”

She paused, seeming to struggle for finding more words. The now guilt-ridden William looked at her with undivided attention, giving her the time she needed.

She looked out at the horizon to the west, taking in the view.

A gentle breeze made her hair sway and from William’s view it seemed to bear with it the words his mother found next, “The truth is, William, I’ve wanted to talk, to try and heal things between us,” She said, wiping the tears from her eyes in a never ending battle before adding, “I’ve been too scared. Scared I’d make things even worse. Scared that I would push you away from us and the village. Scared that you wanted to be disowned.”

William looked down at that last part. He had well and truly hurt his mother with that weeks old statement. She approached him then and put her hands on his shoulders, seeming to have won the most recent battle of tears.

“My darling boy, I’ve been a terrible mother to you,” She said, sorrow and shame lacing her words as if they were a weave of anguish.

“You haven’t be-” William tried, getting interrupted by his mother once more.

Her grip tightened somewhat as she spoke, “I have. I even proved it today. I left without really saying anything and then you had to kill four people to save me. I lost my god, my way, but I don’t ever want to lose my darling son.”

The tears now rose to fight William as his own face crumpled, a mixture of relief and regret. His mother wrapped her arms around him and pulled him into a motherly embrace.

“It’s okay William, I’m here now. I love you my sweet boy,” She said, with a warmth that soothed William’s soul. A warmth that he hadn’t felt in years. He let the tears come and ugly cried into her shoulder, years of sorrow pouring through his eyes from the soul.

A couple of hours later, the two separated their embrace as William had nothing more to let out. His soul felt cleansed, as if one great weight had been lifted from the pile above him. The two composed themselves and walked back to Greenwell, his mother enquiring about the skills and gear he picked up since coming to GAEA while obviously asking him to obfuscate the fight details. Overall, It was a pleasant walk back and the first truly pleasant talk in over a decade.

The talk ended on a sober note as William knew that his mother had stayed strong for him, but had her own demons to fight. He asked if he could help but she gave him a sad smile before refusing, stating that she needed to figure things out for herself.

William sighed in relief when he got back to his shed, finding the girls gone, probably to do other things. He had some time to think and to quell the anxiety he had been fighting back.

William examined his thumb and it was perfectly smooth. His nervous tick had always been scratching the side of his thumb with an index finger, sometimes to the point that blood was drawn, then some. With the stats he currently bore, his skin was stronger than back on Earth and it remained undamaged.

William closed his door and sprawled out on the bedroll, face down. “Relationships are hard, whatever type they may be,” William mumbled as the afternoon and beyond became a rest day.