The day after my phone call with Heron Blue was uneventful, aside from installing a bunch of privacy wards on my office. However, the day after that most emphatically wasn’t. Early in the morning I was already waiting at the train station, having brought my breakfast with me from the cafeteria.
The by now familiar small boxy locomotive trundled up, hauling its single passenger coach and a couple box cars for supplies. The door opened, and the people I’d been expecting stepped out. That said, Heron Blue was quite a bit taller, wider, and more muscular than I’d expected over the telephone. As for Geoffrey, he was absolutely covered in freckles all over his face.
I greeted them, “Good to see you Heron, Geoffrey. If you follow me to my office I’ll start the process of getting Geoffrey enrolled and explain what happened.”
Heron nodded sadly, “Please.”
Take a right after entering from the train station, down the hall, left into the administrative wing, past the wreckage of Humbernot’s office, and then into my office. I sat at my desk, and scooted a couple chairs over for the people I’d be talking to.
I also retrieved a very important document from my filing cabinet, and set it on the desk. Heron took a look at it and noted, “I’ve seen one of these before. This is a magically binding Non-Disclosure Agreement. You’re serious about keeping this from getting out, aren’t you?”
I replied seriously, “It’s for the safety of everyone involved, including Geoffrey. What I’m about to tell you concerns the origins of archmages. There are too many people who want this power for themselves, and don’t care about the ethics of it. As such, I need you and Geoffrey to sign before I will explain what archmages truly are.”
Geoffrey signed right away, but Heron took her time thinking about it before she did too.
“You’ll tell us now, won’t you?”
I nodded, “Correct. You are presumably aware of the difference between Sharps and Ductiles correct? Sharps can hone a mundane skill to the point of transcending reality, while Ductiles have access to the various magical languages, and can even invent their own.”
Heron frowned, “Yes? I don’t need that part explained. But Archmages prove a person can do both, I think?”
I sighed, “No, we actually can’t, believe it or not.”
Heron looked ready to interrupt, but I continued, “There are no exceptions to a person only having one type of magic available to them. None. Archmagery only looks like an exception from the outside. What actually happens is that if a Sharp and Ductile work very closely in tandem they can combine their powers to achieve effects that neither could do on their own. And this works best if both are in the same body as each other.”
Heron looked at Geoffrey for a momen,t “So-”
That’s when Geoffrey piped up “I told you Xiu wasn’t dead, mom! She’s in here with me!”
Heron froze in place for several moments as she pieced together the implications of all this, “That’s why you Archmages keep it such a secret, isn’t it? You don’t want evil wizards going around and stealing people’s souls for more power.”
“Correct; it wouldn’t even work very well unless they found someone willing to help in their plans, but the damage done would be far too great. There’s already that ‘Lord Valiant the Dreaded’ character trying to capture an Archmage and coerce the secret out of them. Though with how it’s been going for him he’s really more ‘Lord Vallium the Defenestrated’.”
Heron thought for a moment, “Er, I have a question. If all Archmages are actually multiple people, then who’s your… partner for lack of a better term?”
I answered, “Also Adrian, though from a world where I’d been born Sharp instead of Ductile. Anyway, I think it’s time for the school tour.”
I got up from my chair, noting, “If you two haven’t had breakfast yet, I recommend the cafeteria as our first stop. The food there is decent, and it’s covered by the guest expenses section of the budget.”
Geoffrey agreed, “Yeah I’m hungry.”
So off to breakfast we went. Oatmeal day today, so not my favorite if I was being perfectly honest. Still, it was filling and warm; which had helped a lot earlier when I was waiting for the train in the cold and dark.
I let Heron and Geoffrey sit at one of the staff tables today, though with the understanding that once Heron left Geoffrey would have to be seated with the other students. After a few minutes of quiet eating, we got on with the tour.
I pointedly didn’t show them anything in the basement. Not only was that not a place Geoffrey was supposed to go, but despite being reasonably professional the Budget was still an incredibly dangerous magical phenomenon. Letting children anywhere near it would be courting disaster. Also I didn’t want to risk the boiler getting damaged; winter was rapidly approaching and I wanted the heating system in full operating condition.
Anyway, I quickly finished up the tour. Heron agreed that this was probably the best place for Geoffrey, since he legally couldn’t be any place with a population over a thousand until he turned eighteen. And I quickly got them through Geoffrey’s enrollment paperwork.
After that, Heron left them on the train, and I had one of the dormitory managers find the new student a room. It’s only then that I made the chilling realization: I now had an underage Archmage at my school. If ever there was someone Lord Vallium would try to kidnap, it was Geoffrey Blue.
Don’t panic, don’t panic, panicking will only make things worse. Practically speaking that terrorist was going to find out about Geoffrey sooner or later, so that meant I needed to make sure the school could handle an attack. The children under my care were in more danger than usual.
Right, so let’s think clearly about what I can do to mitigate this. My other side noted that he couldn’t just write a rule requiring that all hostiles go annoy the budget; his abilities needed at least some level of legitimacy with the other party to kick in. However he could help make it so the security and custodial staff could simply show up where and when they were needed. Along with ensuring that children were shuffled out of dangerous areas.
Still… I glanced at the clock. Ah, lunch time.
As I left my office, I spotted the same trio of students who’d opted to spy on me earlier. They looked rather annoyed.
So I asked, “What is it you three want to talk about?”
“Who are you a spy for? You’ve been changing staff around like crazy and it’s really suspicious.”
I looked down at them, my expression distinctly unimpressed.
“I’m an insurance investigator who was promoted to an administrative position. I then got a court summons requiring me to be headmaster of this school.”
Ford asked, “And the constant staff changes?”
“The people I replaced were bad at their jobs, and in the case of Professor Arrence were tormenting the students. They had to go.”
I didn’t deign to entertain this any further, and started walking away. I didn’t get very far before Sarah asked, “What did you do to Humbernot?”
I couldn’t help it, I laughed. “Oh, that’s the wrong question entirely. You should be asking what he did to himself.”
So off to the cafeteria I went. As I was standing in line I happened to spot my head of security at the staff table. Since I needed to talk to them anyway, I sat across from them after collecting my macaroni, peas, and sausage.
He greeted me, “Hello Headmaster.”
“Please, call me Adrian. Anyway, I need your advice on a sensitive manner. Would you please come talk to me in my office at your earliest convenience?”
Mark looked rather puzzled, “Sure? But why not the security department?”
I answered, “Because I know for a fact my office has very good privacy wards. I’m not so sure about the security department.”
Mark nodded once, and we both set about eating our lunch while it was still hot. A few minutes later, we returned our trays and started on our way back to my office.
The three from earlier were currently absent, since presumably they were still eating. However I had no doubt that they’d be around again to spy on me some more. Seriously, did they have nothing better to do with their time?
All that aside, I sat down across my desk from Mark and started explaining, “So, the issue is that we now have an eight year old Archmage enrolled at Red Point. I’m worried that a certain would-be Lord will try to kidnap him. Do you have any recommendations for dealing with this?
Mark put his hand to his chin and thought for a moment, “The obvious answer is perimeter wards, panic buttons in all the rooms, and giving the kid in question something that can get him away from trouble in a great hurry. Shame teleportation needs a prohibitive amount of power; it would be perfect for getting him to safety in an emergency.”
My other side grinned using our shared face, “Ah, teleportation is only prohibitively expensive for Ductile magic. For those who are Sharp or Archmages, it’s just a bit restrictive as to when and where it can be done. I can handle Geoffrey’s emergency escape button.”
The conversation carried on for about two hours as we hashed out the details of a security system, much of which would need to be made in-house on account of requiring Archmagery. Still, there were needed supplies and equipment, and those would cost money. And thus I found myself in front of the Budget once more.
“At our current funding level, it would take two years to afford all of these materials without unacceptable budget cuts to other areas.”
I sighed. So much for that idea, at least on any reasonable time scale.
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After some more discussion about what should be prioritized, I asked, “Could you possibly start getting the highest priority materials at affordable levels? In the meantime, I’m going to pen a request for additional funding.”
“Certainly. However there won’t be any results for at least a month.”
And with that it was off to my office, where I would be very carefully choosing my words. The fact of the matter is that the more people knew about why I wanted the security system upgrades, the more likely the funding was to get approved. On the other hand that also raised the likelihood of a move by Lord Vallium before we were ready. I was certain that man had moles in the Education Department for just this sort of occasion.
My other side chimed in that with a bit of adjustment, he could at least ensure the moles couldn’t directly use the information on the funding request. It would be fairly simple to make it so anyone in Lord Vallium’s employ would simply not be able to read the sections explaining the presence of an Archmage on campus, even after the message was faxed.
And so we got to work, typing up the request in approximately an hour before faxing it off to the educational department.
I slumped in my chair. That had been mentally exhausting, and the day still wasn’t over. Still… looking through my paperwork, I’d gotten enough of it done that there wouldn’t be a major backlog if I put it all off until tomorrow. So I told Lucy I’d be taking the rest of the day off, and went to sit out in the courtyard.
I wasn’t exactly expecting the gaggle of students who showed up, but in retrospect I really really should have. Staring at the crowd of assorted children and teenagers, I simply sat and rested.
Eventually one of the older students asked, “What are you doing here, headmaster?”
I sighed, “Taking a break. I’ve had a very exhausting morning, and barring a major annoyance I need some time to rest.”
Another student, “Is it true that Humbernot drank himself to death?”
I shook my head, “No, he lived. From what I heard he’s set to stand trial for embezzlement and a few other things when he can get out of the hospital.”
“Are you a mob boss?”
I stared at him. Of course that rumor had spread around; Ford wouldn’t have kept his mouth shut about that unless actively threatened.
Still, I answered honestly, “No, I’m not a mob boss. I worked for an insurance company before I got this job. Professor Demouls used to be a mob boss, but isn’t any more. That said, I don’t think asking him about it is a good idea.”
The questions continued for about an hour, getting more and more outlandish as time went on. Eventually I got tired of them.
“Right, the questions are starting to get quite annoying. If you don’t give me some peace and quiet I’m going to the staff room for the rest of my afternoon. It’s quiet there.”
The questions didn’t cease, and true to my word I picked up my chair and left. When I got to the staff lounge, Jethro also happened to be present.
As I sat down on one of the sofas I asked, “Jethro, is there anything fun to do around the school? I’m taking the afternoon off, and it would be nice to have some activities available.”
Jethro thought for a moment, “Well, aside from the student clubs there’s really not all that much to do around here. That said you’re not legally required to be here every hour of every day. It’s only an hour or so each way on the train, and there’s plenty to do in Skanaport. You could easily take a short trip there every once in a while.”
I smiled, the idea did sound quite appealing. The next train wasn’t for about forty minutes, so there was plenty of time to look up interesting venues in the directory. I quickly noticed that there were quite a lot of bowling alleys there; I’d never bowled before, but it seemed interesting.
Jethro looked over my shoulder at the directory of bowling places. After a moment he noted, “I recommend Helen’s place. I go there all the time, and she keeps it very clean. Plus there’s interesting challenge lanes for magically inclined bowlers.”
“I think I’ll take you at your word. Would you like to come with me, or is this just a short break?”
Jethro quickly checked his schedule, “Yes I think I’ll come along. Someone’s got to show you how it’s done after all.”
And so we both got on one of the short trains headed back to Skanaport. It had brought the daily food and writing supplies on the way here, and on the way back it was carrying an awful lot of trash.
The train ride was uneventful, and we transferred to one of Skanaport’s local trams as soon as we disembarked. From there it took about ten minutes to reach Helen’s Bowlorama.
I simultaneously found the sign technically impressive and incredibly tacky. True, showing a looping animation of a ball slamming into bowling pins was a non-trivial piece of Mancia. But the color scheme was incredibly garish and the glow was bright enough to cause notable light pollution.
Anyway, we went inside. One of the young women at the desk greeted us, “Hello Jethro, who’s your friend?”
Jethro gestured for me to introduce myself, “I’m Adrian Adley, and I’ve never actually bowled before. Jethro agreed to show me how it worked.”
I caught a glimpse of Shauna’s nametag as she noted, “Right. A string of bowling is sixty per lane rented. Ball and shoe rentals are forty per person per night.”
Very reasonable prices. I quickly dug out the money for the lane and my equipment rentals, while Jethro insisted on paying for his own gear. A couple minutes of changing shoes later, we were staring at one of the lanes.
Jethro noted, “I’ll go first so as to show you how it works. You get two throws to try and knock down all the pins, then it’s the next person’s turn. And you have to keep your feet behind the foul line.” before throwing one of the heavy bowling balls underhand down the lane. It curved slightly to the left, impacting just to the right of the head pin.
All but one pin went flying, and Jethro quickly knocked that one down too. Then he noted, “Anyway, if you take two throws to get them all down that’s called a spare. And that adds ten to the value of your next frame. Your turn Adrian.”
So I grabbed a ball, stepped up to the foul line… and quickly pitched it directly into the gutter. I did try to correct its course using telekinesis, but the lane was warded. My second throw at least knocked down a pin, but that wasn’t really much consolation.
Over the next thirty minutes or so, I learned something about myself: namely that I was absolutely horrible at bowling. At the end of the ‘string’, Jethro had gotten a roughly even mix of spares and strikes. Meanwhile I’d got a total score of about thirty.
Still, Jethro smiled, “Cheer up, no-one’s good at bowling when they just start. It takes a while to get used to how it throws. Plus the lane’s actually oiled, and it’s less slippery at different parts. So the ball tends to hook in a way that’s not obvious if you don’t know about it. Want to go again?”
Looking at the scorecard, I remarked, “You know what? We’ve got another couple hours before we need to head back to Red Point and I’ve got the spare cash for another few strings. Let’s do it.”
I only improved a little bit over the next few strings, but at least I stopped throwing gutter balls by the end of it. Still, eventually our time and disposable income ran short and we had to go back to Red Point.
The train ride was uneventful once again, though the conversation was nice. Then we got closer, and I noticed a plume of smoke rising from the courtyard. I immediately reached for my radio, only to realize that I’d left it in my office when I clocked out for the day.
So as soon as the train came to a stop, I immediately got out and dashed for the nearest member of the security staff. “Gloria, what happened?”
The security guard turned to me, “Some kid got the bright idea to bring one of his drawings to life. End result was a literal paper tiger mauling people until someone set it on fire. Only one fatality, thankfully, but the rest of the victims are in really bad shape.”
Well shit. I’d always suspected there would be a nasty magical accident at some point, but I hadn’t thought one of the students under my care would actually die. Right, it was time for damage control.
“I’ll have to write to the dead student’s family about this soon. They need to know. Can I see the infirmary?”
Jethro hummed, “You may want to wait on that a little. Anne can be a bit scary when she’s putting people back together.”
I blinked, “Anne? The school’s doctor?”
Jethro hummed, “Yes, and she’s very Sharp about it if you catch my drift.”
Oh. “Now this I have to see.”
“Well she’ll be in the infirmary if you really want to watch.”
I knew where that was thankfully; Jethro had shown me the first day. Still, I’d somehow managed to not meet Anne up to this point.
So I walked over to the infirmary, opened the door, and was immediately confronted with a three armed woman singing opera through her surgical mask as she busily sutured up a little girl’s chest cavity.
“Right, the replacement organs should serve you well for about a century. No major exercise for the next two days!”
I watched and waited with a mix of disgust and amazement as Anne moved to the next patient. She practically whirled through diagnosis, treatment options, and major reconstructive spinal surgery in the span of about five minutes. Even a Bionce master would be hard-pressed to keep up with Anne’s pace, and most would be making critical mistakes in such a rush. But as far as I could tell, every kid Anne worked on was leaving with a clean bill of health.
There was definitely a transcendent skill at work here.
It took about twenty minutes for Anne to finish up with the last patient, at which point she took off her surgical gear and turned to greet me. “Oh, hello! You must be Adrian, the new headmaster. Sorry I hadn’t come to meet you yet, but it’s check-up season and I needed to make sure none of the kids had any lingering health conditions.”
I briefly reviewed what I’d read of her on the staff roster, which wasn’t much.
“Nice to meet you Anne, I’m indeed Adrian. Er, I don’t believe I ever learned your surname?”
Anne’s expression soured “I don’t have one. Not anymore.”
“Er. Do you want to talk about it?”
“No.”
Immediately, Anne perked back up. “Anyway, if you want to talk about anything else I’m open for discussion. Shame I couldn’t save little Reese, but her brain had been smashed all over a wall and that’s one of the only things I can’t fix.”
I nodded sadly, “Yes. I do have to notify her parents about this, and I’m not looking forward to it.”
Anne thought for a moment, “Actually, you might not have to. I think we have everything needed to revive her. I piece her body back together, you retrieve her mind from the past with Mancia, just need to get an unused brain from somewhere.”
What.
I turned to Anne, “I… I can’t do that. Yes I’m skilled at Mancia, but I never specialized in its more necromantic side. And we don’t have any way to source a brain.”
Anne thought for a moment, “If you can’t, there might be another option. I’ll keep looking into it.”
I felt sick as I walked away. What in the world was going on with Anne!? Who thinks that you can just find an ‘unused’ brain around!? Right, I definitely needed to look into her past more.
...Still, she seemed to mean it in earnest. Not sure if that made it better or worse. Thoughts whirled through my head as I kept moving down the hallway.
I happened to bump into Jethro on the way, as he was busily helping with the cleanup from the paper tiger’s rampage. After a brief conversation, he reassured me that my day was going to get better soon.
My day did not, in fact, get better.
When I finally got back to my office, there was a faxed reply from the education department waiting for me. As I read it, I felt dread overtake me from one very simple fact. My request for additional funding had been denied. I wouldn’t be able to upgrade the school’s security system.
Geoffrey Blue was still at risk of getting kidnapped by Lord Vallium.
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