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Final Assessments

Six months after I first arrived at Red Point, the woman I’d talked to on the train to get here returned. It was time for my performance review. While I knew Reese was going to come, I’d been explicitly told not to talk to her until she came to meet me in my office. It could be seem as trying to tamper with the results anyway.

So I simply tried to go about my day as normal, stewing in anxiety the whole time. I’d gotten around to lunch when Jethro evidently noticed my stress levels, and beckoned me to come sit down across from him at one of the staff tables.

As I set down my steaming hot plate of mashed potatoes, caramelized onions and sauteed chicken chunks, I asked,

“So… why did you wave me over?”

As Jethro answered, I noticed Franz sitting down to my left.

“You seem really stressed out today, Adrian. Want to talk about it?”

Briefly meeting Franz’ gaze, I answered,

“It’s my six month performance review as headmaster, and I’m worried that I haven’t done a good enough job.”

Jethro shook his head and smiled.

“Adrian, six months ago this school was a dump. Worse than that, it was rapidly falling apart and teetering on the edge of a magical gang war between the students. Yeah it’s been bumpy and I lost some very good friends, but in half a year you’ve completely turned the school around.”

Franz also reassured me.

“Injury rates are roughly a twentieth what they were before you got here. Even factoring in the new security system, the way you’ve shaken up Red Point has made it a much healthier environment for the students. Thank you.”

I couldn’t help but tear up a bit, even as I ate a spoonful of my lunch.

“That helps a lot, thank you both.”

I felt Franz’ hand on my shoulder.

“You’re welcome, Adrian.”

Shortly after eating, I made my way back to my office. Despite the reassurances of Jethro and Franz, I was still incredibly nervous about whether I would pass review.

Eventually, Reese arrived in the office, her fluffy tail swishing behind her as she entered.

“So… am I keeping my job?”

As she sat down, she replied

“That remains to be seen. I am required to interview you, and there are a few questionable matters I wish to inquire about.”

My thoughts whirled with what exactly those “questionable matters” might be.

“For the recording, please state your name, age, and current occupation.”

“Adrian Adley, thirty seven, headmaster of Red Point Magic Academy.”

Reese wrote that down in her clipboard.

“Do you consent to Mancia truthfulness verification for the remainder of this interview?”

“Yes.”

She turned a dial on a device clipped to her belt, before continuing.

“Have you ever at any time had inappropriate contact with the children?”

“No.”

The device on Reese’s hip blinked a green light and flashed once.

“Student testimony indicates that prior to your arrival there was a significant bullying problem at this school. How did you address it?”

“The pre-existing security team was fired and replaced with personnel willing to sign a magically binding contract. Said contract includes clauses requiring the serious investigation of bullying incidents. In addition, confirmed bullies were put through mandatory counseling. The addition of the security system was also a major factor in nearly eliminating bullying.”

Reese took a moment to write that down. Then she continued,

“Educational attainment requirements for schools such as this are that ninety percent of graduating students must be capable of acting in a civically responsible manner without excessive supervision. As of the last graduation period, only sixty seven percent met that requirement. How do you account for the shortfall?”

Ah. This one was going to be quite tricky to answer.

“I’ve only had six months to turn this school around; most of the students currently hitting graduation age have been here for years and thus were undermined by years of neglect. In addition, many of the needed staffing changes were heavily delayed by the security upgrades required to deal with the terrorist attacking the school. This is the best I could have reasonably done with the hand I was dealt.”

Green light, one beep.

Reese noted that down as the interview continued. That said, her expression clearly communicated that she was required to ask this next question, but didn’t fully agree with it.

“With regards to the security upgrades, how necessary were they exactly? By all accounts the most recent intrusion was being handled reasonably well prior to its reactivation.”

Fortunately, I had an answer for this all ready to go.

“The most recent intruders weren’t a supersonic vampire that a maniac fed sixty people to. In addition, there was significant risk of students being injured or kidnapped even with the actions of the security team. Now that guards have been posted in the boiler room, that sort of risk has been greatly reduced. Even aside from hostile intruders, the security system has dramatically cut down on the student injury rate and aided enforcement of anti-bullying measures.”

The lie detector sent its truth signal again.

Reese hummed for a bit, clicking her pen a few times as she thought.

“The most recent review of the cafeteria shows significant use of produce grown on-site. Have they been properly tested for nutritional content and food safety?”

I quickly retrieved the records from the filing cabinet, and showed the forms for the test results of the fruits and vegetables to Reese.

“All produce varieties have been tested; they’re clean of pathogens and highly nutritious.”

Reese looked through the documentation for a few minutes. Eventually she nodded in approval, apparently satisfied.

The questions continued for about an hour. Then Reese put away her folder full of newly-written documents and got out a second one.

“That concludes part one of the interview. That said, the entity known as the Budget must be discussed. The fact of the matter is you have a dangerous magical entity in the basement handling finance.”

Ah. Them.

“The Budget is an employee of the school; they have performed their role with impeccable professionalism, and saved my life during the vampire attack.”

Reese hummed

“Be that as it may, the fact is it still killed two innocent people.”

“That was before the Budget gained consciousness, they can’t be held responsible for things that happened before they fully existed as a person.”

By Reese’s expression, she seemed unconvinced.

“Well then, if you’re so adamant the Budget is a person, it would only be fair for it to self-advocate.”

With that she clapped her folder shut and filed her paperwork away in the briefcase, standing up as she did so.

“Headmaster Adley, please escort me to the accounting office. I do believe that is where the entity resides, correct?”

“Correct.”

A few minutes later, we were at the Budget’s office.

Hello misters Adley, miss Scarlet.

Looking at Reese staring across the threshold, I could tell she was struggling to remain professional.

“I take it you are the Budget?”

Correct. I handle the school’s finances. Would you like to peruse the financial records?

“That is not why I’m here. I am here because there are concerns about the safety of having you in the same building as children.”

I have no interest in killing people. Replacing them is too expensive. The costs involved in medical oversight of pregnancy, childbirth, childcare and education mean that it outweighs any possible gain from killing.

Reese stood silently for a moment as she tried to digest that. Evidently it wasn’t the answer she had expected. Eventually, she followed it up with another question.

“Budget, is there any significant risk of you accidentally subsuming someone?”

I am a sessile organism; I am therefore unlikely to round the corner and bump into someone without warning. My position and hazard are known to all relevant personnel, as are the appropriate safety protocols for working with me. The students are the only group not thoroughly briefed on how to safely interact with me, and they are not permitted to enter the basement.

In summary, the probability of accidents is extremely low.

That said, entering my office without a hazardous magic suit is still ill-advised. Psychological damage is likely even with me actively suppressing my functionality.

Reese stood absolutely still for a good three seconds, the Budget’s straightforward factual bluntness apparently catching her off-guard.

“Budget, are you being absolutely truthful there? I warn you, if you aren’t it could carry severe consequences.”

I have no reason or motivation to lie. It is true that I am dangerous as a consequence of my nature. Despite that, I have been scrupulously law-abiding since attaining consciousness.

Reese sighed, the disgust evident on her face. “The education department wants you destroyed, claiming that you’re a threat to the students and staff of the school. Give me a reason I shouldn’t let them do it.”

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The education department has no legal avenues to pursue this course of action.

Reese and I both blinked.

“What.”

I filed my citizenship paperwork four months ago. It was approved on the winter solstice. Attacking me in any context other than self-defense would be a crime, and I would immediately contact the school’s on-site officers. In addition, forcing termination of my employment would be in violation of fourteen separate anti-discrimination laws.

Before anyone else could speak, several documents floated to the desk the Budget used to work with other people.

These are notarized copies of the relevant forms and certificates. I will retain the originals for as long as I exist.

Your move.

Reese spent approximately twenty minutes reading the Budget’s citizenship documentation, and I couldn’t help but be curious myself. Looking over it, everything seemed to be fully legitimate. Reese still didn’t seem quite convinced, however.

“This has to be some sort of trick. How could you even contact the relevant offices?”

I have a fax machine.

Indeed, there was a fax machine in the accounting office. It was even hooked up to the outside world with its own extension number and everything. As we spoke an invoice for something or other printed out of it and was swiftly examined.

Funding shortfall of three Ren for cafeteria ingredients. Allocating from the discretionary fund.

Reese’s jaw dropped in flabbergasted anger.

“You… you really don’t care about what I’m asking do you?”

I do not. I live for finance, and have taken action to ensure I can keep doing it. Now please leave; you are most annoying.

Reese huffed “This is ridiculous, I’m going to ask the NMCU officers on site to come down here and look into this.”

They already know. Feel free to talk to them; they will corroborate my account.

As Reese stormed off in a huff, I stayed by the Budget’s office for a little bit longer. Once she was gone, I asked “Just checking, that wasn’t a bluff?”

It was not. I am now legally a citizen of the Union; I intend to vote in next year’s elections among other things.

“Got it. Thanks for all the help, Budget.”

You’re welcome, misters Adley.

Later I saw Reese in the cafeteria around suppertime. I didn’t talk with her, but she seemed slightly annoyed. Still, I wasn’t worried.

Jethro on the other hand was kind of worried.

“Adrian, Reese has been kind of annoyed since she went and talked to the Budget. Are you sure she won’t deliberately mess up her report?”

I shook my head.

“The Education Department started using magically binding contracts for their auditors since the scandal with Humbernot hit the news. She’s got no choice but to be totally honest and accurate about things. Can’t try distorting things with some kind of technicality either; that contract is ironclad.”

Jethro nodded slowly.

“I hope you’re right Adrian, I really really do.”

The conversation continued for a few more minutes, then gradually trailed off as we all turned our attention to eating supper.

We didn’t hear back about the results of the performance review for a bit more than a week, and it was really hard not to spend the entire time stewing in anxiety. Still, eventually the fax machine in my office started printing out the official verdict on my performance.

Once it was done printing, I collected the document and got to reading.

Department of Education

Form 2024-B: Performance Review Return

To Adrian Adley

Preface

This document contains the results of your six month performance review. Each category has both a numerical score and a section for commentary.

Category 1: Educational Attainment

Numerical Score: 7/10

Commentary: Interviews with teaching staff indicate that all current personnel are highly competent and effective teachers of their subjects.

However, the student body is still reluctant to open up to said teachers and make effective use of their services. Compounding this, the grades from the winter exams were notably below average.

While the department understands that there is much lost ground to cover from the damage your predecessor did, procedure requires such deficiencies to be accounted for in the score.

Good to know that the person who evaluated that report was actually capable of understanding context. That said, they were right about the low performance of the students in an academic sense. I’d have to work on that more over the coming years.

Category 2: Student Discipline

Numerical Score: 8/10

Examinations of disciplinary records indicate that the rate of bullying incidents has significantly decreased since you began your duties. That said, they still have not been fully eliminated.

Aside from bullying concerns, students have been regularly documented performing magic without direct adult supervision, which is not approved of by the department due to accident risk. Extensive safety instruction reduces this risk significantly, but does not eliminate it.

In summary the discipline of the student body is rated as sub-optimal, but satisfactory.

Well that was a rather blunt assessment of the student body’s situation. I couldn’t really disagree with it, especially the note about unsupervised magic use. That said the fact of the matter was the students were going to use magic unsupervised unless we brainwashed the lot of them, and that was illegal. Best we could do was harm reduction.

Category 3: School Security

Numerical Score: 10/10

In less than six months, the school has been the direct target of attacks by terrorists twice. The vampire attack alone would have normally taken no less than thirty highly trained vampire hunters to reliably defend against.

Given the extreme danger the school was subjected to, the total lack of student fatalities from both attacks is nothing short of a miracle.

Your other actions to ensure the security of the school have been deemed effective; both the replacement of the existing security team, and the addition of the security system has dramatically improved the safety of the school.

Addendum: That said running off after terrorists isn’t part of your duties, and is not encouraged.

I couldn’t help but shudder at the mention of the vampire attack. That day was utterly terrifying, and we came way too close to everyone dying. If not for the Budget, we would have absolutely been slaughtered. Worse, it was pure luck that I saw the vampire coming in time to stall it with that force field.

...That said, the bit about my near-death experience from Vallium’s bomb was definitely deserved. Seriously, what was I thinking? Ah yes, I wanted to make sure Demouls didn’t get themselves killed. Thanks for the commentary, other me.

Category 4: Facilities Upkeep

Numerical Score: 10/10

While there are still some maintenance issues needing to be addressed, the fact is that Red Point Magic Academy would not have passed a building inspection when you began your duties. Under your leadership the state of the building has undergone drastic improvement. As of this assessment, Red Point is in the upper two thirds of schools in terms of physical condition.

As such, your performance in this category is nothing short of exemplary.

Nice to get some genuine well-deserved praise that wasn’t tied to a traumatic event. Seriously, the state of the school when I first got here was utterly horrific. That wasn’t even considering the utterly disgusting disaster area that was Humbernot’s office. Even now I didn’t want students in there; it had ended up as a storeroom for cleaning supplies.

Category 5: Working Environment

Numerical Score: 9/10

Employment conditions are more than satisfactory. All staff have reasonable working hours, and working conditions are as safe as circumstances permit. All staff interviewed spoke highly of your management skills, especially when subject to truthfulness verification.

There is only one issue, namely that pay is slightly lower than department regulation. As this discrepancy is due to loan payments for the installation of the security system, it has been determined that disciplinary action is not required. Loan payments will henceforth be handled by the Education Department, rather than the funding of Red Point Magic Academy itself.

Huh, well that was quite nice of them. After all that wrangling to get the security system in the first place, it was nice that the department was footing the rest of the bill for it. Really hoped there wasn’t some sort of catch attached.

Overall Score: 8.8/10

Being entirely blunt, it’s amazing just how thoroughly you’ve turned this school around in only six months. Your expected level of performance was far below what you’ve proven capable of. In addition, you went far beyond what any reasonable person would have asked of you during the vampire attack. We eagerly await seeing what you do in subsequent years.

Signed: Assessor Reinstar

Having finished reading the document, I sat back in my office chair and thought for a bit. I was going to keep my job. While it had been hard at several points, I rather liked working here. It was certainly a lot more engaging than my previous job, and I’d become very good friends with several of the staff members here.

Speaking of them, I should probably go tell them about the results of the performance review.

I made my way to the break room. When I got there, Jethro and Franz were both present along with Tim. Sitting down on one of the couches I announced,

“So, good news. I’m keeping my job.”

Franz smiled.

“That’s wonderful! You’ve done so much to turn this school around it would be a massive shame if they replaced you.”

Jethro nodded in agreement.

“Yes, the last six months really haven’t gone how I wanted… but you can’t really be blamed for that. If it weren’t for you, it would have been so much worse.”

I nodded sadly. We’d all lost friends in the vampire attack. All except Tim Rust, apparently.

“Was it the-”

Jethro, Franz and I answered simultaneously

“Yes.”

Jethro noted,

“I’d really rather not be reminded of that day. I lost several good friends then.”

I nodded solemnly, as Tim looked mortified.

“Sorry for bringing that up.”

Jethro sighed.

“Don’t mention it. No really, don’t.”

Franz opted to speak up, in an attempt to lighten the mood.

“In other news, another student came to me for help transitioning. Had her done up no problem in fairly short order.”

I couldn’t help but smile.

“That’s great to hear, Franz.”

I got up and retrieved a drink from the break room’s refrigerator. Checking the label, it looked to be a carbonated Date-flavored milk drink. Neat. Unsealing the bottle and taking a sip, the wonderful creamy texture and flavor really helped take a load of stress off.

Once I was done with my drink, I noticed Tim and Franz had left the break room. Jethro asked,

“What next?”

I just sighed in contentment and flopped further back into the couch.

“Two hours of just sitting here and relaxing. After everything I’ve been through these last six months I deserve it.”

“You know, I think I understand that. Was that drink any good? I’ve never had it before.”

“It was excellent, you should try it.”

The head custodian got himself a bottle of it from the fridge, sat back down, and took a sip. After a few moments to savor the taste, he remarked

“This is definitely good, but not really my favorite. I like my drinks more tart than this.”

I shrugged “No accounting for taste I suppose.”

“Bowling this weekend?”

“Sure thing Jethro. I’ll see if Demouls and Rou are interested in going too.”

There were a solid two minutes of companionable silence as we both took an opportunity to simply rest. Still, eventually I had to get up and go to the bathroom. When I got back, Jethro broke the silence with a simple question.

“So, think you’re ready for next year?”

Mulling it over with my other self a bit, we eventually answered,

“You know, I think I am.”

– FIN –

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