After almost an entire year obsessing over the same visualization, it had expanded to truly ridiculous proportions, yet he still found all kinds of things, both big and small, to rectify or improve upon.
He would never be satisfied with his work, and despite having a literal eternity in front of him, he doubted he would ever come to a point where he would be proud of his creation. He was too focused on the myriad of flaws that still had to be addressed.
He just couldn’t appreciate how far he had gone, only how far he still had to go. He had spent so long, he needed to validate his work and confirm that his toils and tribulations were meaningful and had a use in reality.
He felt very anxious as he finally completed the rune, as his work of more than nine months was being evaluated and judged by an unfeeling system.
As soon as his brush caressed the chasm walls, Avery felt a rush of mana, emerging from wherever it dwelled to race through his body, forcing itself through his stylus, flowing to complete the glyph in record time.
As usual, he was going to try and follow the path of mana, but he was distracted as he received enigmatic feedback from the rune, causing him to experience a brief enlightenment.
He sensed the rune was calling to him, eager to share some of its profound truths. He realized inputting all those emotions and concepts into the rune served a deeper purpose other than simply occupying his mind or making him slightly faster.
Perhaps engraving served as a sacrificial ceremony, where his intent was somehow given significance and projected into the void to elicit a response. He would make an offering of his deepest feelings, and the rune would awaken and answer his call, bestowing knowledge in exchange.
Unfortunately, the tribute had to meet a minimum requirement, and he was just shy of it. It was enough to start a conversation, but not enough to gain anything from it, like when you can hear voices in the distance, but cannot tell what they say.
Avery had fallen deep into this enlightenment. It was a special state bestowed by the heavens, where his comprehension was elevated to a completely different level. He felt that he could see through everything, and that the entire world had become clear. Just by looking at something, he could see through it right down to its fundamental principles, learning everything about the how and what of the universe.
Every cultivator yearned for such an experience, but instead of being pleased, Avery felt miserable. He was eager and ready to learn, and to make the most of his opportunity, but he had nothing to understand. The rune had deemed his offering unsatisfactory, and was therefore withholding all of its knowledge.
Avery was left alone at the bottom of the dimly lit crevasse, with nothing to study, nothing to understand, nothing to learn and nothing to gain. The rune gave nothing away, jealousy hoarding the knowledge from any unqualified viewers.
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He was given nothing to contemplate, and when he turned his attention to other things like the cycle of the sun and moon or his body in an attempt to find something to understand, those thoughts would be chased away. His epiphany was labeling such thoughts as distractions and was helping him concentrate by forcibly refocusing his attention on the unintelligible rune.
Holding back a wail of despair, he frantically tried to focus on the rune, itching to reach out and grab at it’s knowledge, desperate to glean anything useful that would fuel his enlightenment.
Ding, congratulations, you have crafted a perfect rune. +10 Points.
In the end, the system ring woke Avery up, and he could only watch as his enlightenment ended without gains, growing even more frustrated at having squandered such a legendary state.
Unable to bear it any longer, Avery screamed out in frustration, flailing wildly in the air, gesticulating to evacuate his impotent rage. He shouted and cried and howled, when his throat was raw or his fists got bloody from punching the ground, a time warp would fix it, keeping him trapped in his helpless tantrum.
He was consumed by his fury, his rationality exiled from his brain. He knew what he was doing wasn’t constructive, and that every second he spent tending to the flame of resentment in his heart, his carefully constructed visualization was fading away and getting more and more blurry.
He knew he had to control himself, but was incapable of doing it. Finally releasing all of his frustration on the world felt so right, so liberating, he just couldn't help it.
It was empowering, he was imagining he was punching so hard it would break the dragon scales he was trapped on and kill the evil serpent.
He needed to show the world that he existed, that he had power, and that his feelings mattered. He needed to prove that his actions had consequences, that he was more than an unnoticeable speck in the universe, that he had personal agency and free will, one of the last freedoms nobody could take away from him.
He needed to remind himself that he was not alone in the world, and that sunlight existed. His memories of friends and family, of beautiful beaches or imposing mountains weren’t just a dream, and he was not going insane.
Life wasn’t supposed to be bleak and hopeless, he had something to look forward to. Happiness was waiting for him somewhere, and he just had to get there.
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And still, the dark abyss remained unchanging, enduring his violent outburst with no reaction, the dim atmosphere even suppressing the savage howls and blows.
He had let out his hopes and feelings into the world, and they had been mercilessly shattered and crushed.
He had tried to battle the uncaring void, and had lost miserably.
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Avery’s fighting spirit was ready for war, but had nothing to fight. His frustration burned hot, erupting in volcanic fury, but in the end it had all been for nothing. Nothing happened, nothing changed, and nothing ever would.
He had called for a companion, a savior or even an enemy, but only emptiness had responded. Unfeeling darkness had drowned his fury, until even the flame of resentment smoldering in his heart dimed and died out.
His body was constantly healed, able to fuel his wrath for eternity, but in the end his mind couldn't hold on anymore, and he had to surrender. His struggles slowly weakened, until he was trembling limply on the ground, almost welcoming the encroaching darkness, hoping it would swallow him up and end his misery once and for all.
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Finally, for the first time in three years, Avery fell asleep.