The Lich And The Devil

Part 1

“Pffft.”

I snickered silently, thinking about something hilarious.

“-That guy will get real~ pissed right about… Now!”

In front of me, a man who was walking idly past the cafe I worked at looked down and realised the pants he wore were the wrong way around and also inside out.

I undid the illusion magic for him to notice right in front of me.

Ah… These emotions of utter inconvenience and frustration… How delicious.

“Muahahahaha! I think I’ve had my fill for today.”

Recently, I’ve been rationing out my daily intake of dark emotions.

Why?

Because of that stupid perverted old man Arch-Priest! Ugh, I can’t believe I made a promise not to hurt him and feast on the people of that settlement!

Devils take contracts seriously.

I swear if I didn't make that promise, I’d make him pay dearly for humiliating me like that!

I have to keep my head down in this town and keep my pranks to a minimum… Or I’ll be targeted by him.

I got too bold in the last settlement, and they called for that disgusting Arch-Priest…

After being kicked out of that settlement, I made my way to the Town of Ally and got a part-time job at a Cafe, where I’m standing right now with a work apron on.

I was a stray devil, I was rejected by the underworld for my poor tastes in dark emotions. And of course, the living beings in the upper world disliked the presence of a devil. So, as a stray High-Class devil with my peculiarity, my only choice was to hide amongst the people and work a normal job.

Though typically, a normal stray Devil would hide in the shadows in the upper world and feed off of the dark emotions of torment, despair and such and wreak havoc amongst the people, making enemies of adventurers and nations as they feasted on their meals.

But with my tastes, there was no need to go to such lengths.

I just needed to play annoying pranks on people, and my stomach is sated!

I worked at a cafe, there were no customers, so I stood there boredly.

“Hey! This table needs cleaning up!”

My manager called for me.

“Coming!”

This job paid well, was inconspicuous and fine. I can have my fill of dark emotions, and live perfectly fine here.

I got too greedy with the human settlement before, but I was completely fine with small bits in this town, much like if a normal devil got too greedy by committing mass genocide, that normal devil would feel completely fine with torturing a single individual.

But I’m not a good person though, if my tastes were normal, I’d do exactly like what my fellow devils would do.

I’m a devil, after all.

As I finished cleaning up the table, I noticed a pale man in a suit walk in.

“Welcome! A table for one?”

I welcomed the man with a cheery smile.

“Ah, no, I’m here to speak with your manager today. Is he here?”

“Of course!”

I went to call for my manager to meet this mysterious man.

I listened in to their conversation:

“-Ah, so you’re Mortimer Raven. Thank you for buying this business, I leave it in your care.”

Ah right, the manager did say he was selling the business.

“No, thank you for allowing me to buy it.”

The pale man smiled professionally.

If you spot this tale on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation.

This guy will be my new boss?

He smells… Like an undead.

Isn’t anyone smelling that?

Oh well.

…

“Who… Who keeps doing this?!”

It’s been a few days since Mortimer inherited this small cafe restaurant.

Of course, I’ve been making his life a living hell.

Ah… These dark emotions taste so good! He’s perfect! He’s the perfect dish!

“This mix of human annoyance with the sour taste of an undead… Ah~ So good…”

It was sweet and sour.

“Did you say something, Seraphine?”

“Nothing, boss.”

After inheriting the small cafe, Mortimer put his head down to understand the business, make connections with suppliers and begin improvements to this desolate cafe.

As a result of his efforts, things have been getting better.

He did say he was a sucessful merchant before buying this cafe .

“By the way, Seraphine, when something a little bad happens, you seem happy. Is that my imagination?”

“It’s just your imagination, boss.”

I cleared up such foolish misunderstandings immediately.

Maybe I should tone it down a bit.

“Anyways, boss. Why did you buy this small cafe?”

I was curious.

Mortimer looked up into the ceiling while seated, and replied:

“Well… I’ve retired as a merchant, and living alone far away in my estate seems to be a bore. I don’t want to stand out, and this cafe seems desolate enough. I’ve never tried my hands in an owned cafe business so I decided why not. And I owe a favour to a certain person in this town.”

Ugh, I owe someone in this town a favour too.

A certain helmeted crusader.

“Yeah, but you’re an undead, right? Shouldn’t a lich like yourself prefer to be alone?”

“Eh?”

Mortimer looked at me with widened eyes as I exposed his true identity.

“What, you thought you could trick me? Seraphine, the High-Class devil?! I’ve known since the moment you walked in that you were an undead middle lich. I could smell you from a mile away! So, tell me, what are your true intentions in this town?!”

I crossed my arms, looking down at the shocked Mortimer with a wicked expression on my digital face.

“Y-You knew I was an undead? Hah… Wait, you’re a High-Class Devil?!”

Mortimer quickly stood up defensively.

“That’s right, I’m a devil!”

I puffed out my chest in pride.

“What’s a devil like you working part-time in a place like this? Shouldn’t I be asking you what your plans are in this town?”

Mortimer and I matched gazes.

Luckily, there wasn’t anyone in the cafe during this time to witness these events.

“Well… Uh, the nearest town with a decent enough population was this town.”

It would take forever to travel to another town.

“I mean, you’re not gonna hurt me, are you?”

Mortimer fearfully asked.

“Well, I have no reason to.”

I replied.

My boss knowing I was a devil would be a great convenience. Even better if he was a heteromorphic race himself.

So this was very favourable for me–

“-Eh? I smell it too, Young Priestess! An undead and a devil’s scent somewhere around here!”

Suddenly, a deep voice echoed from outside the cafe, getting closer.

It was a disgusting familiar voice.

“Eek!”

I knew that voice!

Just hearing it sent shivers down my spine.

“-Mortimer! Hide, quickly!”

“What-”

Before Mortimer could comprehend anything, I grabbed him and escaped through the backdoor of the cafe.

“-What’s going on!”

“There’s… There’s a dangerous piece of perverted trash lurking outside, if he catches you, we’re done for.”

I peeked inside, and saw the Arch-Priest Father Stan and his Priestess snooping around.

“-I don’t see anything, Father Stan.”

“-Perhaps the devil and undead made a quick stop here. Let’s move on then.”

The two extremely evil beings decided to go away for now.

“Phew, that was dangerous, we were almost killed there’

“Killed? What do you mean? Seraphine?!”

“That was an evil monster that lurks around this town, if you ever see him, hide immediately.”

I lectured the ignorant Mortimer.

It seems like he was a newbie lich and couldn’t sense people with strong Holy Attributes properly.

“Aren’t we supposed to be the evil monsters?”

I ignored Mortimer’s comment and dragged him back into the cafe.

“He was an Arch-Priest! Our main enemy! Look, I can tell that you became a lich very recently, so your senses are a little dull. But eventually, you’ll start to feel an imminent sense of dread and danger, that means a perverted Arch-Priest is near. Be sure to hide when that happens.”

“I-I don’t get it, but I understand.”

Beings like us who had a natural dislike for Holy Attributes had that sense, likewise, people with higher Holy Attributes could smell us too.

With that, we decided to keep working.

[End Interlude]