The giggles of an insane god reached my ears, as a sixth Blackstone Fortress covered in etheric lightning joined the party and dropped hundreds of armored suits to fight the emerging Lords of Change, who came out from the mouth-gates of the Impossible_Fortress .
Trazyn managed to twist his metal face into a scowl, just as my anger began to raise as well. For inside those light armor suits made of adamantium and Wraithbone, there weren't Eldar harlequins but Blank humans, with features resembling those in my clan, even one looking exactly as my dead brother Veryon. Their pauldrons held sigils and runes of both Imperial and Eldar types, while a bleeding heart was painted on their chests. Lancefires, every one of them. But no sisters, and I suspected I knew who absconded with the females of my bloodline.
'Do you like the new Immortals, Warmaster Lancefire?' the Laughing God asked in my mind, as a blue beam of Immaterium struck the nearest spire of the Impossible Fortress and melted a hole large enough to fit a Titan.
"He who fights at my side shall be my Brother." I answered out loud, setting the anger away for a later date. Revenge could wait, even if someone abused my mother to create these new kind of Solitaires.
Canis growled in shared pain as well, just as Trazyn released his flying Anime-mecha Titan modified from an old Psi-Titan recovered from the days of the Horus Heresy. Gauss Flayers and Psi-cannons fired from the Necron Titan carved a Lord of Change into shreds of false meat and burning feathers. "I called it Shiva, Destroyer of Worlds." Trazyn revealed in a proud voice, which brought a flicker of smile on my face.
My Necron friend was also the dramatic type, it seemed.
"Shiva needs a cape, but otherwise it looks great." I quipped in a joking voice, just as a Goddess made of lightning and righteous fury emerged from the Cegorach's Fortress and burned a dozen Great Daemons to ash with a single Antipathic Tempest spell.
The Demonifuge was back, and seemed even stronger.
'You stick your impregnation gland into that abomination, Lancefire?' Zath asked with mild horror.
'Ephrael has amazing bed skills, my C'tan friend. But if she's here...that idiot Harlequin is not far.' I realized a bit late, just as a water balloon struck me in the face.
Mnemorach appeared beside Canis and hugged his neck, and even scratched my wolf behind his ears. Canis was obviously confused between pleasure and the need to rip the harlequin's hands off, so he just growled in a low bass tone.
"The band is back, Captain Lancefire. Not exactly a proper theater troupe, but amusing even so." Mnemorach explained in his annoying high pitch voice, just I began setting my troops and armor for a proper siege.
Billions of daemons crawled out from the mouths of the Tzeentch fortress, and were met with Volcano Lances from my Knights, and then Neutron Lasers and Magma Cannons from the Baneblade tanks.
"I have an army of Immortals as well!" Trazyn the Infinite disclosed in a secretive tone, as the metal bodies of his Necron race descended in a shield-wall formation, using the stolen shields from my tesseract, and an array of Necron weapons so advanced that their portable arsenal matched my tanks with ease.
"Meet Olivia, and her Castigator 'Blinding Hot' Titan." I countered, producing the third Castigator Titan towering above all the armies present, and blinding everyone with a salvo of Volcano Cannons and even larger Plasma Annihilator gun.
Taking huge strides, the Castigator breached the Impossible Fortress first, and swatted aside several Great Daemons who tried to block her way, with a single slap of the giant Power Fist. Perhaps I wasn't wrong to give a giant Titan a large melee weapon. It sure seemed useful.
"I want one of those, please..." Trazyn pleaded in an impressed voice, and two more Castigators appeared and began punching at the Chaos fortress from different angles.
Damn my bleeding heart. He also said the magic word.
"Only if you give yours a cape." I decided, with a mocking voice, mostly to annoy the Blade if and when she recovered.
Trazyn nodded seriously and tugged at his own metallic cape. "It would look awesome, I admit. Not some useless human fabric though. Maybe a hyperweave cowl or a Shadow Shroud?" the Necron Overlord mused in a thoughtful voice, while Mnemorach stared at both of us in obvious outrage.
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"Pay attention, damn human! The battle to end the Great Enemy is taking place right now, an epic saga of galactic..." he yelled with passion, but I ignored the Pariah Solitaire as the Lorica Thalax cohorts and my Primaris Astartes joined the battle as well.
'Breach the Fortress and loot any books, before our allies get too many' I sent as a standing order, as more units rushed into the Impossible Fortress, followed by Sisters of Silence for extra support.
The cyborgs and the Space Marines had their own brains, after all, and enough training and doctrine practice to manage the fight by themselves by now.
Feeling a bit peevish, I began displacing billions of Orks and feral Tyranids at different mouth entrances, making the whole thing a race for the center. There would be no controlling the Tyranid Auxilia like this, when a thousand Norn Queens have died and broke the Crystal Labyrinth in half.
I took stock of my companions, finding the Sisters of Battle and the Custodes barely bleeding from their noses a little, while Lady Valyene shivered inside my tesseract and mumbled prayers. Her pretty eyes were gone again, exploded at the same time as the Norn event took place.
Psykers were so fragile, the poor things. My Blank children and grandchildren were all fine, as were the Necrons and the C'tan.
I was feeling pretty good about this battle, when the ugly reality of 40k showed its face.
Falling through the Warp cracks above, Space Hulks and Void Whales distorted by Tyranid fleshcrafting bomb-dived the Impossible Fortress, crashing though the pretty colors and bird-spires. The Hive Mind arrived for the feast as well, and millions of Tyranid Tyrants and other bio-titans ran into the depths of the Impossible Fortress, while billions of genestealers and hormagaunts formed a blade blender to massacre lesser daemons, and even struck at nearby Orks and Necron Immortals.
The Tyranid organisms were not immune to magic spells though, and they died in droves as the blue and pink horrors answered with warp fire.
My tesseract vision also caught several Norn Emissaries vanishing into the Chaos Fortress, invisible to any human or daemon eyes.
I needed to hurry, or risk losing the race.
"Primarchs, prepare for deep strike! Custodes as well!" I ordered before turning to my left and stealing a kiss from pretty Sister Morvenn. For luck.
"We're going to die in so much pain." the joking harlequin added for no reason as I urged the Singularity to plow though the broken wall of the Chaos Fortress and create a breaching ramp.
"I would prefer to..." I began to say when a loud howl covered the battlefield noise, and raised the hairs on my arms.
"Those idiot Orks...they released the big bad wolf way too soon." Mnemorach spoke in a worried voice,
"Leman Russ?" Trazyn asked with a curious voice.
The five Primarchs present turned towards me with worried eyes, even Angron who normally didn't care about any danger. That was the power in a name, that and the loud howl that shook the Warp itself.
"I'll deal with the Wolf Primarch. You guys just kill any daemons that bar my way." I ordered in a confident voice, and even Canis tilted his head at me in doubt.
"So much pain..." the Eldar Solitaire added for no reason. Didn't he say that before already?
'Turtle formation! Castigators in front.' I ordered as my Imperial Knights and the armored units formed a protective shell around the Sisters of Battle and the Blank Sentinel Auxilia.
The Chaos Fortress shook as the howls of the big bad wolf got closer, the deeper we went inside.
"Rejoice, brave humans and allies! For we all walk in the Shadow of the Immortal Emperor!" Sister Stern chanted as she dropped beside me and reduced her lightning aura to a skin-tight field.
I grabbed her ass and lifted my faceplate to taste her immortal lips once more. "You look so hot today!" I whispered for her ears only, which blushed to their tips from my words.
"Idiot...now it's not the time." Ephrael muttered annoyed, and she pushed me aside with enough force to send me flying a dozen meters. I loved strong women!
A giant wolf paw shattered the blue floor where I had been a second ago. Damn my luck!