“Did anybody get the name of the bus that ran me over?”

I blinked in the bright light.

“Easy, mate. You’ve been out cold for a few minutes. I didn’t know zombies could be knocked out.”

I chuckled dryly. “Neither did I. Second time it’s happened, though.”

I closed my eyes and thought about my stats. The window popped up a moment later.

Name: Alabaster Blackwood

Race: Zombie Human

Faction: Blackwood Company

Age: 20

Level: 4

XP: 2/120

HP: 206/500

HP regen per second: 0.21

MP: 0/40

MP regen per second: 0.00

Stamina: 66/240

Stamina regen: 0.11

Strength: 29*

Agility: 12*

Constitution: 25*

Wisdom: 2*

Intelligence: 2*

Charisma: 2*

Luck: 12*

Titles: Primordial Undead, Prime Undead, Star-born: Dragon, Noble, Royalty

Skills: Unarmed Combat

Abilities: None

Spells: None

Notes: English, Zombie Common

Condition: Concussion, internal bleeding

Obviously, being knocked unconscious did not confer the same benefits as meditation. I had been out for almost exactly ten minutes. There was a little wiggle room in there, since I knew the system could, but didn’t show additional decimal points.

“Well, what did you get? That was quite the fight, should be some good loot.”

I jerked, having forgotten Basil was there. He made a point, though, and I needed to find out myself. I rubbed my hands in anticipation, then nudged the dead giant with my foot. I was not disappointed in the loot.

Looted!

+10 silver, +1 ‘Warren and Lefty’, +1 ability sphere

Curious, I looked at the newly looted ‘Warren and Lefty’, a matched pair of brass knuckles. The description popped up and I read in wonder.

Warren and Lefty

Brass Knuckles

+1 to strength

A mismatched pair, like any buddy-cop movie, makes for a more interesting story. Warren lost his brother, just like Lefty. They’re out to find their missing pieces and have joined forces to kick bubblegum and take tea.

“What the hell kind of description is that?”

Basil held his hand out, so I gave him the knuckles. He read it over and chuckled.

“Looks like you got lucky. This might be a ‘matched’ pair, but they’re not the intended match. If you’re lucky enough to run across the missing pieces, this might just turn into a more powerful item.”

“I didn’t get a quest, though.”

He shook his head and handed them back. “You won’t. Think of it as a hidden quest.”

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I nodded, putting the knuckles on. I did feel a little stronger with them on, though. “Well, let’s give these babies a whirl.”

“What about the ability sphere?”

I shook my head and opened the quest.

Feral Annihilation

The feral zombies are a threat to your region. As a Count, it is your responsibility to keep it safe. Find and kill all feral zombies.

Rewards: 200xp, 10 silver

Progress: 51/117

“Still got people out there turning. And the quest says there are another sixty-some zombies to kill.”

I charged to the next hallway, shocked no zombies had stumbled back to the foyer. I started clearing room-by-room. Half a dozen, then a dozen zombies went down under my furious blows. The knuckles made my hits stronger, and I had gained a level after defeating the berzerker. The gap between us was only widening. The lower hallway was totally clear after a few minutes. Again, I could hear music on the upper floor, and not much else. I figured the zombies were once more raving out.

“Lower level clear,” I said as I jogged past Basil.

“Not much going on here, boss.”

I nodded, then put some thought into what I could do to help Basil. He needed to level up to keep up with me. And as my right hand man, or zombie, I needed him to have power, too.

“Come with me. We haven’t seen anything down here since the berzerker.”

He hesitated, then nodded and caught up.

“I’ll hold them while you clobber them, okay?”

Basil nodded again, cracking his knuckles. “Got it, boss.”

With the plan in place, I led the way. The upper hallway was packed. I lunged in, heedless of the wild swings of the weak zombies. In enough numbers, I could potentially be hurt. They just couldn’t get enough of a grip on me, and I was starting to understand why Basil had said jumping level gaps was so unusual.

I held the first two out for him to clobber. It took a few hits, but he got into a rhythm. I would hold two up by the neck, acting as a barrier for the weaker ferals, and he would hit them in the face until they went limp. Interestingly, I still got one xp for each feral killed this way.

“Hey Basil, how much xp are you gaining for these guys?”

“Just one, but with enough, I’ll level up again. Then I can probably handle them on my own.”

I recalled his stat sheet. With only 66 zombies left to kill, he would level up with a little wiggle room. That was, unless we found another mini-boss. Or a full-scale boss. Thinking back, I wondered why the Necromancer hadn’t provided a boss or mini-boss bonus.

“Basil,” I started.

He huffed, again weirding me out. Zombies shouldn’t get winded. “Yeah, boss?”

“Why didn’t I get a bonus for killing the Necromancer?”

He paused, one target dead and the other nearly so. He scrunched his brow, threw another punch, then let his arms fall.

“That… that is a very good question. I was just assuming you had, since he was, you know, dead and all.”

I nodded. “Broken neck. I made it quick, at least.”

Basil shook his head. “Being a human, he would have died right there. Fragile, you lot.”

I chuckled. “I’m not human anymore. Well, I guess I kind of am, but I’m a Zombie Human, not a regular one.”

Basil shrugged. “Whatever, boss. I guess we’ll never know.”

I echoed his shrug and presented two more zombies. Ten down, another…

Feral Annihilation

Progress: 62/124

Sixty-two to go. And their numbers were still climbing, though slower than before. But he only needed forty-six zombies to level up. I shoved the ferals back. They had been crowding me and chewing on my arms non-stop. It was annoying. More so because it felt weird, rather than actually hurting much. I mean, yeah, they did damage. My health was around half-way, but it wasn’t a disaster or anything. With how uncoordinated they were, it was actually pretty easy to just shrug them back every so often. They usually just fell backwards, then took their time getting back up.

“I can’t believe we’re related to these chumps,” I said as I grabbed yet another pair. The growing piles of bodies had forced us further into the hallway. I had lost count of just how many he had killed.

Basil had run out of stamina multiple times, forcing us to wait while he got enough to continue the endless dance. He nodded, and I braced. Two more goons were knocked dead, I tossed them aside, and grabbed for more. When nothing came to hand, I looked back.

“Oh.”

“Yeah, boss. We got ‘em.”

I wanted to check my status, but I was more curious how Basil had grown.

Name: Basil

Race: Zombie Human

Faction: Blackwood Company

Age: 138

Level: 2

XP: 108/110

HP: 140/140

HP regen per second: 0.07

MP: 0/0

MP regen per second: 0.00

Stamina: 0/140

Strength: 8

Agility: 7

Constitution: 7

Wisdom: 1

Intelligence: 1

Charisma: 1

Luck: 1

“Oh, buddy. You are so, so close. We need to get a few more and you’re going to hit level three.”

Basil looked at me in shock. I saw his eyes go unfocused, and realized that was what it looked like to him when I checked a window.

“Nearly a hundred years to get to level two, and level three in an afternoon. You are something else.”

I winked and shot him with a finger gun, saying “Stick with me, bud, and we’ll be champions in no time.”

“What the actual hell was that?”

I shook my head. “I don’t know. Just seemed right. C’mon, let’s go kill some more feral dummies.”

He followed me back to the foyer, and we stepped into the third hallway. It was immediately obvious this one was different from the first two. It was only one level, but with vaulted ceilings. Fancy chandeliers hung every fifty feet, covering the massive hall in glittering light. It had to be three-hundred feet long, fifty feet wide, and forty high. As fancy as the other wings were, it was clear this room was the point. Statues were stationed between the gargantuan windows. They looked like knights, each with armor, and even weapons. It looked like a fancy ball-room in a castle.

“I swear, I saw this same room in Resident Evil 4.”

“I don’t know what that is.”

I wave him off. “Video game. Really awesome one. Come to think of it, that was all about zombies, too.”

“More nonsense coming out of your mouth.”

A rumble stopped our conversation. I held a hand up, and only somewhat to my shock, Basil stopped next to me.

“What is it?”

I shook my head. I couldn’t see anything. I checked the quest to see what it said.

Feral Annihilation

Progress: 99/100

“I… I have no idea what this means.”

“What?”

I flicked the window over to him, and it worked. He ‘hmmd’ for a moment.

“That is puzzling.”

“You know, I’ve been thinking about it.”

Basil turned and looked at me. This close, I finally noticed he had mismatched eyes. Did he naturally have heterochromia, or was that because he had gained a new eye somewhere along the way?

“Please, please don’t say something to jinx us.”

“You believe in jinxes? I guess some things are universal. No, I don’t think I’m gonna jinx us. Just, there was something niggling at the back of my mind.”

Basil shook his head. I plowed on.

“I killed that mini-boss, and the system called it out.”

Basil hung his head. “I knew it.”

The rumble came again, followed by a roar.

“I mean, I killed the necromancer, right? Looted his body and everything.”

The roar grew louder, and I looked at the far wall across the ball room.

I grinned. “I never got a notification for killing a boss.”