I lay on my side in the corner of the cage, idly scratching a finger along the steel bars beside me. The metal underneath is as uncomfortable as ever. I try to angle myself to lie between two of the bars, but it just makes it feel like it’s digging into my body.

It’s hard to distract myself from my circumstances. I’ve been trying to remind myself of good memories, usually falling back to the days with my tribe, with Leal, and I am surprised to note that even thoughts of the five from Kelton have wormed their way in. But every time I think about the times I miss, I’m forced to realise that those times are over. I’m never going to see any of them again.

The capsule weapon sitting innocuously beside my cage is a constant reminder of my pending death. My attention can’t help but drag back to the machine any time my thoughts wander. The amount of time I’ve spent just inspecting the capsule and train it sits on, you would think I’d have it memorised. But any time I look away, my thoughts twist the visage of the machine into something far more terrifying. I have to keep looking at it now. If I don’t, I’m sure my fears will overwhelm me.

Hunger pangs within my chest, but I refuse to beg them for something to eat. It’s not much of a resistance, heck it’s less self-preserving than anything, but I don’t want to give them the satisfaction.

A whistle sounds through the camp, and in an instant, the area is bustling. Albanics surround the capsule train and many run back and forth, all the while everyone is yelling.

A massive cylinder of metal on a rail-car rolls down the tracks before it clanks against the capsule rail-car, albanics connecting them together. The simplicity of its shape belies its immense size. The long metal barrel suspended far in front of the train carriage it is mounted.

A crew of six albanic with reflective metal armour circle my cage before one of them addresses me. “Finally, we get to see all our efforts pay off.” I recognise the giddy voice as Heisenberg. I’ve never heard him sound so happy. “Remember, enact the process at the sound of the buzzer. Any delay will result in continual punishment until you do as instructed.”

Before I can prepare myself, they move my cage right up to the capsule and have their sticks pushing at my back. I put as much effort as I can to stay away from the machine, but the curved heads of their poles lift me from underneath my arms and legs and shove me in despite my struggles.

My feet stumble and I try to throw myself out, but the door is already sealed behind me. Fists slamming into the door and walls achieve nothing.

I slump, my back sliding down the curved wall. The ball in the centre of this capsule looks different. The platform holding it up is nowhere near as thick, more like a thin pole now.

I’d hoped beyond hope they would decide against sending me out. I don’t want to die, especially not for the Henosis.

Suddenly, a terrible idea hit me; if I am going to die anyway, then why not take out these bastards while I can? I don’t want to die, but I have to be real for a moment. There is no good luck coming my way, no miracle coming to save me. I am going to die. And if I have to die, I want it to be on my own terms.

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My body jerks to one side and I realise they must have started the train. With not much time to waste, I throw as much energy into the ball in front of me, following the guidance I’d been led through in the prior weeks to enable whatever is in this sphere before me. I can feel a massive difference to before, I have no idea what it is, but it reacts to the energy I’m pumping into it. I throw as much energy as I can spare before reaching to the power sources lining the walls of the capsule. My flames reach into the inscriptions to find that energy I know is always there… and find nothing.

They’ve blocked off my connection to the fire source, so I can’t get enough strength to finish the process. I lift my hands to my head and slam it into the wall behind me. Of course I won’t be given the opportunity to start the weapon just like that. It would be far too easy if I could just end things like that.

The heat in the orb before me cools and whatever is contained within returns to a stabilised state. I’m drained. I can’t do that again if I try. Not without the energy sources powering the process.

The palms of my hands push into my face as I wallow in dismay. I’d been determined to die, but even though I resolved myself, it meant nothing in the end. Nobody will be avenged by my actions. I won’t be able to give a proper funeral to Teine’s family, nor will anyone perform one for me.

I’ll die achieving nothing.

Within the spherical capsule, I roll around with each motion of the train. I don’t care anymore to resist what happens to my body with each curve in the rails.

My mind remains blank, unthinking for the hours of travel. Time just passes, and I couldn’t be more glad. Unthinking of those I’ve loved and lost. Unthinking of those I hate. And unthinking of the future before me. Everything that happens just passes my consciousness like wisps of smoke. I could grab at them if I wanted, but I don’t. I leave them to blow away in the wind.

The hammering sound of a bang snaps me back to consciousness. The capsule lurches and shudders from what can only be an explosion. I struggle to breathe as I realise the train isn’t moving. All goes quiet for a minute before another thundering bang slams me into the wall as the train pitches.

The buzzing noise I have been dreading blares in my ears as the train returns to a stop. The pod shudders as another, more subdued bang resounds, dissimilar to the previous two.

I ignore the buzzing. There is no chance I’m just throwing away my life. Try as I might to keep that thought at the forefront of my mind, the moment the water sprays down on me from above, I can’t help but break down. I let out a scream, but can only hold on for a moment before the pain has me going through the process once again. Reaching into the walls, I find the energy sources are once again available to me.

I twist and weave the flames powered by the walls into the orb before me, relieved only momentarily that the water stops before the situation kicks in. I’m going to die. Either painfully by the spray of water or the unknown of the weapon I’m about to set off.

I don’t understand what is happening within the orb, but whatever is in there is becoming unstable. It feels like I’m edging ever closer to a cliff, but not quite tipping.

More and more energy is pumped into the ball, and I can feel the moment it reaches the tipping point. I keep throwing more energy at it like the Henosis want. The moment I stop, I know will be the moment everything will end.

The capsule jumps and I struggle to keep in control of the flames pouring over the orb as an impact knocks the train on its side. Each second, it gets harder to supply the orb with enough energy to keep it from escalating out of control, but I still want to believe I have a chance. I don’t want to give up, no matter how slim my chances of survival are. If I can do anything to survive, I’ll do it.

The train tilts once again and before I know what is going on, the thick metal of the capsule above me tears open. Beside the light of day, above me looms an enormous giant of an ursu. The fear overwhelms me, and I finally cannot support the energy needs of the orb.

Everything burns white, then black.