Helplessness is a feeling I’m all too familiar with. The overwhelming difficulty of simply trying to live is something that never seems to ease.
Maybe I’ve become arrogant in my strength. I mean, I can even compete with Viisin now, so I thought it would be no issue to just burn my way to my goals. Burn the mermineae. Incinerate any who threaten me. Violence and murder have become such an easy solution to my problems, but no matter how much power I gather, the world is determined to make me struggle.
Kalma isn’t someone I can fight.
Not only would I have no chance against her in a fight, she has gone and severed my ties to the nations that protect my friends. The centzon weren’t even an obstacle for her, so I don’t understand why she felt it so important to punish me personally.
Does she know Grímr was with me? Has she taken her anger out on him too? If I knew where he was, I would be on my way to find him immediately. Unfortunately, I don’t. I can only hope that wherever he was sent for his recovery is out of her reach.
Not that anything could stop her.
Is there anything I can actually do now? Kalma has such a stranglehold on this war that every side will wipe themselves out unless something changes. Drastically. Without being part of the Mercenary Order, I can’t try to convince them to switch their priorities. I’m sure nothing could change, even if they know of Kalma’s true influence. They still need to fight off each of their invaders.
Can we convince any of the invaders to back down? Both New Vetus and the Theocracy are opportunistic, so it will be difficult. It’s the mermineae that have the most chance to back down, but for that to happen, I would have to reveal Kalma’s plot to both their clergy and the traitors. That will be incredibly hard considering the immense number of their kind I’ve personally ended.
Even if I can convince them that Kalma has not only known of their plans to escape from the start, but actually incited that idea within their numbers, would they stop invading? They are terrified of her, and rightfully so. I can’t imagine they would go against her wishes for fear of the consequences. Not while they know she’s aware of their actions.
It is hopeless.
I have no better idea, so I fly to Meja. I want to see my friends again and make sure they’re safe before I meet with Remus at the team’s cabin. Hopefully, we’ll be able to think of some way out of this together.
My last option is to take those I care for and run. I would lead them to the wasteland and eventually the Agglomerate, if I didn’t know for sure that some would refuse to leave.
My flight through the pact nations is not undisturbed, but I shake off each of the volans that try to intercept me. Only the mages amongst them can reach the same pace Jav could after being flung by Remus, and therefor able to keep up with me. Those that command me, I ignore. The ones that attack, I threaten with flames of my own.
It’s not an optimal solution. It will hardly make me look any less guilty in the eyes of the pact nations, but I can’t stop. Not now.
When the volan interceptions stop, I know I’ve entered the mermineae controlled land. Unfortunately, that happens far earlier than I expected.
Half of Meja has already been overtaken. I don’t know why I thought the city I’d left my friends would have remained untouched, but I had. Assuming they’ve been evacuated, how will I find them? There’s so many places they could have gone.
It also means the meeting point Remus set for us is far behind mermineae lines. Far from where the Mercenary Order can reach me.
I’m not worried about what the Order might send after me. With how hesitant they’ve been to utilise their Beiths, I can’t imagine they would have one chase me down unless I’m actively attacking them. What I am worried about is that they might punish my friends because of what they think I’ve done.
Many mermineae pass below. I could spend some time clearing through them, to make it easier on the pact nations’ defence, but I don’t see the point anymore. No matter how many I clear out, it won’t make a difference. They aren’t the true threat. They never were.
I arrive at Baansguard. I’d been far too petrified of the city’s enclosed nature the last time I was here to truly appreciate its scale. Unfortunately, the large carved living platforms have seen better days. Many have crumbled. There are clear signs that Viisin went unopposed within the city’s confines.
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The sight of dried blood leaves a sick feeling in my chest. My friends were evacuated, right? They couldn’t have just left all the citizens to die here. They pulled the citizens away from the cities bordering the conflict zone down south, so it’s only reasonable that they did the same here, right?
I have no way to find them, either. The pact nations are likely going to treat me as an enemy of the state like Joiak did before the ursu destroyed it, so it isn’t like I can just go searching for them.
All I can do now is hope they are safe. Wherever they might have gone.
With how much land the pact nations have lost, I can’t imagine the safer cities doing well with the massive influx of refugees. Even if they got away from the battles without issue, what kind of life are they now living?
There is nothing left for me in Baansguard, so I leave for my team’s cabin. Technically, as a part of the team, it is mine too, but I only spent a single night, so it hardly feels like a home. I barely recognise the building when I arrived in the clearing. Like the city, it too is empty. The scratched up wooden deck and door show the mermineae have been here, likely ransacking for anything worthwhile.
I approach the couch I’d slept on when I was last here. A few metres behind it, I dig through the earth and pull up the pouch with my mum’s marble. I’d left it here for safekeeping when we first left on our hunt. At the time, it had seemed safer to hide it rather than keep it on me, and I’m glad I did. If I hadn’t, I probably would have lost it somewhere along the way.
There’s nothing for me to do except wait for Remus, so I jump onto the couch and bring out the small glass orb. The unmoving pink flame still shines with intensity through its black encasing despite all the time that has passed. Like it’s frozen in time.
What would my tribe have done if they were here? Would mum or auntie or uncle find a solution that I’m simply unable to see?
With as much time as I have with my own thoughts, my mind falls back on Kalma’s words. She mentioned some unbelievable things, like the world is ending and the Void regaining sentience. I shouldn’t believe her, but she made her comments with such conviction that I have to at least consider their possibility.
How might the world be ending? Does it relate to the Void Fog gaining awareness? Is the Void Fog going to kill everyone? No, that’s probably jumping to conclusions. She said I smelt of Anatla. What is Anatla? Did she mean the Void Fog when she said that?
Haven’t I heard the term Anatla before? They have something to do with the revontulet, according to the centzon. How is the revontulet related to the Void Fog? I saw one of those foxes within the Fog. Is that important?
If the world truly is going to end, why does Kalma not try to stop it? She has enough power to do anything, so why is it only being used to spread chaos?
Wait, if the world is really ending, then why does she think the curse I’ll experience because of the Void is worse than any torture she can inflict? Could it be that she won’t hurt me directly because I’m Void-Touched?
It’s an incredibly flawed train of logic that I’m sure isn’t even close to the truth, but if there’s the smallest chance that she can’t attack a Void-Touched because she fears the Fog, or Anatla, then I know what I have to do.
I’ve felt both their presences, so I know Hund couldn’t beat Kalma, but if she can’t attack him, then he might just be able to scare her off. He is Void-Touched as well.
The only problem is that he is still bound by his own version of the knot. If I can disentangle him from the control of New Vetus, we might all have a chance.
I’m on my feet and ready to take to the skies in seconds. This can’t wait. The longer I delay, the worse things will get. If Remus gets here within a day, I’d stay, but there is no guarantee he can get here that fast. Every day I wait, the closer the battles get to the heart of the pact nations.
There will be a point that the Mercenary Order is backed into a corner and will unleash every elite they have. If things go how Kalma wants, that will be the day millions will die.
I feel bad for leaving Remus, but this is too important. I burn a message into the outer wall of the cabin, where he couldn’t possibly miss it, and blast south. Time to go to the ursu’s capital.
❖❖❖
“Damn it Solvei.”
Remus stared at the char black message strewn across the front wall of his team’s home. He was glad Ossian wasn’t here to see this. The caretaker would grouch when someone dragged dirt inside, the khirig would faint when he saw this.
Despite his original thoughts upon seeing the city in flames, there had been far too many questionable facts for him to believe it could have been the young áed. Not only was that far too much white flame for him to reasonably assume the girl could have supplied it, but the central crater did not match the damage to the rest of the city. Though, that would be impossible to prove because of the black glass coating that had once been molten rock.
Remus had seen the energy cost between different flames during his time with an áed tribe, so he knew Solvei couldn’t have created that blaze, even with the capacity she’d accumulated for herself.
Once more in his life, guilt riddled him. He’d assume the girl had gone for retribution, and paid little attention to the innocents in her way. It was only when he locked eyes with her he knew she hadn’t done it. At least not intentionally.
Though none of the other mercenaries would believe him. This was as open and shut as it could get to their eyes. It didn’t help that Remus couldn’t answer how this actually happened. Especially considering all the mages pointed out the flames had the same signature of influence as the girl herself.
So, to hear Kalma, the feared god from across the Titan Alps, caused the disaster was concerning.
Remus ran to the abandoned cabin as soon as he could, but he was sure he’d been days late to meet her. She’d run off again without waiting, to convince the greatest threat of New Vetus. Her goal was foolish and unlikely to achieve anything but her death, but he was already too late to stop her.
All he could do would be to gather everyone and be ready to help her when she returned, whether that was with Hund by her side, or chasing with his blade raised.
Fortunately, Remus had a plan of his own.