I didn't see my mother again for a few hours. We went back to the Necromedes and retired to our own rooms in the building Killian had lent us. It had been a long...however long it had been. I honestly didn't know, with the time distortion we'd felt like we'd spent weeks, but as far as I could tell it had only been a day since we were transported, at least based on my wish ability.
Despite that, I decided to meet with her alone, and everyone else had gone to sleep by the time she showed up. Her knock on my door was tentative, like she was scared of my reaction, but when I opened it I couldn't tell if she'd been more scared I'd open it or that I wouldn't.
My room was pretty spacious, and I even had my own little side kitchen. I'd been nervous and couldn't sleep so I'd made cookies, and I made us both some tea to go with them before we sat down to talk.
"So..." I said, taking a long, slow sip. "Explain." I didn't stammer, or make nice, or try to distract. I wasn't going to make this easy for her. As much as part of me felt bad about how miserable she clearly was, part of me was just pissed off. Why did Chelsea get a real parent while I got dad? Why did she leave me and never reach out. Why had dad all but told me she was fucking dead and made Zeke imply the same?
She let out a shuddering breath. "Alright. Explain. That's going to be tough, but I can do it. I'm just trying to figure out where to start. I suppose at the beginning. Do you remember I told you that the Red Revenant and Black Sorrow used to be married?"
That seemed like a bit of a non sequitur, but I wasn't going to interrupt. I just nodded, hoping I was giving her serious 'get on with it' vibes.
"Well, they also had a daughter. Her name was...well, most people called her Drowning Shade. She wasn't always exactly a nice person, though stories of her nature were somewhat exaggerated. Regardless, she was their only child, and they both loved her. She spent most of her time with her mother, but she would visit Holy Dominion, and while things between them had long since devolved into aggression, she was allowed to come and go as she pleased from a young age."
I frowned. "That...doesn't match what I was told. I thought your dad killed her. In fact, legend has it he wiped out a whole planet doing it."
She nodded. "That's the story. But it isn't what happened. The Red Revenant had one daughter, and seven disciples. His most trusted students. Drowning Shade grew up in and out of the Holy Dominion and she spent time with all of them at one point or another. But she was especially close to the man who would eventually become the Radiant Pope. My father, Nicholas Anders."
"So they were an item?" I asked in surprise. "And grandpa killed her? That's...cold." And honestly fucking disgusting to me. Imagining having to kill Callie, for any reason, made me ill. My mom seemed to notice, because she shook her head.
"Shane, Drowning Shade isn't DEAD." She said emphatically. "She never was. The planet my father 'destroyed' was a false flag operation. He evacuated all the inhabitants before he wiped it out. He and Drowning Shade had been secretly together for years at that point. Something her mother didn't know about or she'd have killed them both. Despite loving her daughter, recursion had long since eroded most of Black Sorrow's humanity. Especially in regards to her husband."
"Alright." I said slowly, still not seeing the relevance. Still, it was interesting history, so I wouldn't derail her. "So why then? From what you said this was ages after they first became a couple. Why did they suddenly need to fake her death after presumably centuries together?"
"Because she got pregnant." Said my mother. "With me. Ascendants, particularly high level Ascendants, aren't the most fertile people. It's rare for high rankers to have children, at least comparatively speaking. Your father and I having twins was...a shock. Twins are fairly common in lower ranking Ascendant couples, for obvious reasons. But you two were a surprise. It's not time for that yet though, I'll get to it."
I was still processing. "So my grandma, who I've never met was...what? A demigod? Except both her parents were gods. What does that even make her? Was she born a god?"
Mom shook her head. "That doesn't happen. The Impact would be unsurvivable. As far as I know she was born with a divine soul. Specifically a Mirror Soul. Past black, which is what you hit at S rank naturally, is the Obsidian Soul Body, which becomes a Mercury and then a Mirror Soul respectively. I'm sure you're well aware of the benefits of having a powerful soul."
I tried not to shudder at what someone could do with a divine soul from birth. Hell, the things I could do for my level with my Azure Soul Body were already absurd. I had more flexibility and raw control over my Skills and abilities than anyone my rank with a normal soul could match.
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"So grandma was...scary. Ok." I forced my brain to move past that admittedly huge revelation. "Grandma was born terrifying. Good to know I guess, though I don't seem to have inherited any of that. Did you? Or did Chelsea? Is that why you had to take her away?"
Her face twisted in pain. "Sort of. You know Chelsea was born with two abilities, yes? One my father's Flames of Purification. The other was her grandmother's Enshrining Darkness. The power she got from her own mother. If anyone had found out...Black Sorrow would have killed you. Your sister. Your father. Me. My mother. MY father. Probably the guy who sold us breakfast the day before."
Ok, angry god I could understand. That was a rough thing to deal with. But it wasn't like she was the only one. "But what about your grandfather. The Red Revenant would protect his daughter right? You said he loved her. He must have known about all this."
"You have to understand that my grandparents relationship isn't a healthy one." She said, possibly attempting to attain some sort of universal record for understatement. "My grandfather hates my grandmother. But he also loves her. They've been locked in constant battle for millennia. I don't think he's even capable of killing her at this point. Not just because their powers are at a similar level, but because he couldn't bring himself to do it."
"I don't suppose Black Sorrow SHARES these deeply hidden feelings?" I said, pinching my nose as I started getting a headache.
My mother laughed. "The Red Revenant is a different kind of god than Black Sorrow. Emotion and passion are part of his nature. They aren't part of hers. If she found out about us, she would kill us, all of us, and he wouldn't stop her. At least that's what my father says. He wouldn't tell her, of course. But we wouldn't get any help from him."
"Ok, but what does that have to do with leaving me?" I asked. I could see the problem, obviously, I just didn't get why the solution they'd come to was necessary.
She swallowed hard. "Because Chelsea was born with the REAL Enshrining Darkness ability. The one you see Black Sorrow passing out like candy is a modified version mixed with other Skills to make it more easily teachable. Something like the Fist of the Red Revenant my grandfather made for his disciples. Very few beings have that ability, and that in itself would imply her father was a high up in the cult."
My eyes widened in realization. "Except I have the Wish power, and we're twins. Which means dad was her father and there's no place the ability could have come from except you or him. Considering grandpa is an S-ranker with the WCP I imagine dad's lineage is well established. If your daughter suddenly developed the Enshrining Darkness ability at birth, Black Sorrow would put two and two together easily."
"Despite being a sociopathic lunatic, my grandmother is quite bright." Mom said miserably. "The truly absurd amount of Focus she's got probably helps. So, yes. I had to leave. I had to take Chelsea. Because leaving her and taking you wouldn't have solved anything. I had to abandon my baby." Her eyes were welling up with tears, and it hurt to look at, so I kept following the threads.
"My ability." I said after thinking it through. "You traded it to dad for the first eighteen years of my life. You wanted to make me irrelevant to anyone paying attention for long enough that when I did develop powers they wouldn't associate me with Chelsea. Hell leaving me with Zeke probably helped even more. Most people don't know Elijah Wyndham even HAS a son. Is that why dad left?"
She nodded. "Eli...Eli isn't the same man I fell in love with. He hasn't been in a long time. He reminded me a lot of you at your age actually. But he didn't have the Conglomerate to soften him. The Empire is a harsher place. Eli's response to the difficulties most candidates face was to codify relationships. Make contracts. The stronger he got the more he detached. But he ALWAYS loved you. Chelsea too. His method of keeping you safe wasn't the one I'd have chosen. But it was effective."
I couldn't argue that. Even I hadn't known I had a sister. I was, for all intents and purposes, completely uninteresting. Dad had made me basically invisible. Or at least I had been. I'd been doing a lot to demolish that particular defense. He HAD warned me. If I wasn't ready to risk my life I should just stay home and fade into obscurity. I'd made my choice. But that left one thing I was curious about. "What about the Wishmaster? The original one I mean. Dad's...great great grandfather or whatever. Couldn't he have protected us?"
"The Wishmaster's nature is...mercenary." She said with a grimace. "If we wanted protection we'd have needed to pay. We didn't have enough. Even my father can't throw around the kind of resources you'd need to pay to get him to go to war with another god. I promise you Shane. We couldn't see any other way. I'd have done ANYTHING. Given anything, to stay with you."
Her eyes burned with sincerity, tears still streaming down her face. I had to look away. "I believe you." I said hollowly. "I believe that it wasn't a matter of choosing. That it would have killed all of us, including me." Her face was starting to brighten, become hopeful, and I felt like an asshole crushing that hope. "But I don't know if it matters." She flinched like I'd hit her. But I kept going.
"I don't hate you." I said gently. "Not now. I don't think ever. But I can't just...forget. Maybe I can get past it. Eventually. I'm not making any promises other than to try. But as of this moment I just can't let it go. The years of abandonment, the pain. The damage you and dad caused. I can't just wave my hand and say bygones. I get why you did it. But you still did it."
She nodded slowly, almost like it hurt. "I know." She whispered. "I knew it would be like that. And I did it anyway. I knew it would hurt you. I don't deserve your forgiveness. I told you that. But you were right. You deserved to know."
I stood up, walked around the table, and opened my arms. She fell into them, her tears finally breaking into open sobs. I might not forgive her, but I didn't hate her. She was my mom, and the very least I could give her was a hug. We had a long way to go. I had a long way. But despite the pain I was in...part of me was happy. Some wounds need to be reopened so you can clean them. I was pretty sure we were all going to be ok.