As the saying goes, “One does not know the extent of one’s fuckery, until he has been fucked in the face.”
Actually, I don’t think that’s how it goes, but when you’ve just been thrust into an ocean teeming with alien life, tasked with surviving as a creature you chose to turn into cause’ it has sperm in its name and the realization that this is all real and that my retardititty might have just spelled my doom right from the get-go? Yeah, you’d start feeling like a drunk philosopher thinking about your life decisions while spouting bullshit to make himself feel better too.
But, oh well, I’m not one to really dwell too much on this kind of stuff. Too sappy for my liking. Since I’m here, I might as well enjoy it, you get me?
Moving around, I realized my spawn point wasn’t so bad, maybe. It looked to be a huge coral reef, a perfect place for hosting all kinds of marine life, the only thing is, it’s in the middle of a fucking trench, which scared the shit out of me the first time I looked down. If anything, my fear of heights is gonna be the one to kill me. The reef formed a plateau on its foundation of ancient corals, which after a few more layers of the material, dropped down straight into the deep blue. Man, this is scary. But if I stayed on this reef, then I might even be able to live until whenever. The only problem would be food, since as a growing sperm whale, I’d need lots of, and I’m not sure if itsy bitsy fishies are gonna cut it.
The topic of food made my stomach grumble, which brought my attention to the fact that I’ve only been mindlessly swimming around for more than half an hour. This also made me question, how am I able to control my body so well? It might seem like a weird thing to ask, but as a human in mind, it really is unusual. The most sane hypothesis I could come up with is that it came with the perks of whatever being a Beta-Tester was, which wasn’t as sane as I’d hoped. did my best in order to try to get a glimpse of my new form, but to no avail. The most I could see was my fluke whenever I exerted myself in swimming a bit too much and trying out some tricks I’ve seen dolphins do in those shows. Of course, I failed miserably at reenacting most of them, but it was still worth a shot. Gotta have fun every once in a while, no?
I continued to observe my surroundings after calming down a bit and moving in a more relaxed manner. I swam to the edge of the reef despite my inital fear in hopes of getting a picturesque view that included the sun, or at least this planet’s counterpart of, before the day ended. Despite being on a probably empty stomach, I found myself just staring at the beautiful scene before me and feeling like a camera man from National Geographic.
The sun dipped at the horizon, signaling the entrance of five moons with colors that ranged from a creamy white to a martian red, motioning for the creatures of the night to come out and play. As sunlight faded, bioluminescence from the alien corals and an arsenal of varying aquatic fauna and flora soon took over with the task of providing light. The entire reef glowed with life, various specimens milling about doing their nightly business. A small group of miniature sharks with glowing eyes, chubby bodies, and oversized dorsal fins went about chasing what looked like glowing drones, although I’m sure those were fish.
A large school of, what looked to be, shiny rainbow sardines shone like an underwater rainbow(no shit) in the distance, providing a colorful backdrop to the vibrant display of corals before me. I spotted a few familiar creatures including a black and white lionfish, a juvenile reef shark, a surgeon fish, and what looks to be a- what the fuck is that.
My act of professional narration and my best impression of David Attenborough got cut short by a massive, glowing, black and orange eel. Its distinct coloration reminding me of koi back on Earth. It’s length at least ten meters long and about as thick Gorlock the Destroyer, and it looks to have a similarly voracious appetite too, cause’ it just swallowed whole a fucking monster of a grouper. DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW BIG GROUPERS ARE? They’re massive gluttons that would eat anything that could fit in their mouths, even infants and smaller sharks. This particular grouper got eaten whole. Gulped. This one got to experience vore. Just shows how big this fucking eel is. And of course, I’m fucking terrified. You can’t blame me though, even if I’m two or three meters longer than it, and probably a lot thicker, I’m still very new to this whole shtick. As mighty as I am, the moment he devoured that poor fucker, I dashed to the nearest coral and hid behind it, which looked like a horizontally inclined guy hiding behind a street light.
The beast of an eel came from a large, inconspicuous hole within the reef, mouth opened wide, kidnapped the unlucky grouper, closed its mouth, then showboatingly swam back to its hole, glowing even brighter which looked like a display of dominance, or whatever. All of that happened within the span of no more than a couple of seconds. The surrounding fauna quickly scattered in fear as it moved with undeniable elegance. Its eyes glowed threateningly white, and I don’t know if it’s seen me, but I sure as hell am lucky it didn’t feel like going for a whale tonight. As it swam back, it stared in my general direction a bit too long for my liking, did what seemed to be an eel’s equivalent of a shrug, and then quickly burrowed back into its hole. During those suffocatingly long seconds of it staring, I made sure I was as still as a fat, fucking rock, or at least moved as slowly as possible. Someone once said that movements so slow can be imperceptible. I’ve never believed in that saying before but I sure as hell do now.
After disappearing into its cavern, I swam as fast as I could to the surface for some air, cause’ I forgot that I didn’t have gills. The ocean breeze blew past my blowhole as I caught my breath. The moons shone on me as I did my best to relax from the not-really-near-death experience. Still, that was terrifying. Too damn terrifying. And I’m hungry as fuck. And my dumbass just realized I wasted all that daylight doing nothing. Well, I did do some exploring, but I would’ve been able to explore anyways if I had gone looking for food. Day wasted? Maybe. Am I to blame for that? Definitely. Do I regret it? A bit. Okay, maybe a bit more than just a bit, but there’s something else I haven’t explored yet, and I think I’d be able to get something to eat pretty quickly if I wanted to since it turns out sperm whales have night vision, which is pretty cool to me. Am I stupid for putting off hunting despite already being hungry? Yup. A procrastinator’s curse. But there’s something a lot cooler than chasing fish that I haven’t looked into yet.
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‘System.’
Nothing happened.
‘Uhm… stats.’
Nothing.
‘Interface? UI? Settings? Help?’
Still nothing. My frustration and panic rose bit-by-bit. If I don’t have the system thing, then how would my story be considered LitRPG?
“Open.”, said a familiar feminine voice in the most I-don’t-give-a-shit manner.
‘Sam? You’re here?’ I thought, since I’m pretty sure she’s in my head, and that whales can’t really speak English, or speak at all for that matter, aside from the usual clicking sounds whatever whales do with their mouths.
“Unfortunately, yes. I’m stuck with you until you die. So, why don’t you go say hi to the nice eel earlier?”
‘Fuck off. Since when were you watching?’
“Ever since you went out exploring and wasting your time.”, she mocked.
‘So, since the start? What happened to being done with little shits like me?’ I asked. I’m pretty sure she mentioned being promoted from being an assistant to whatever she is now
“I- I got demoted. Moving on, to open the interfac-”
‘You got demoted?’, I interjected. ‘Damn, sucks to be you. I hope the pay cut was huge.’
“Fuck you and piss off. You’re the reason I got demoted, so jus-”
“I’m the reason? Sure. Let me guess, you weren’t allowed to meddle with the randomizer, huh? That’s what you get beyotch.’, I said with as much sass I could muster as a whale.
“If you were in my position, you would too. You’re the most irritating beta-tester I’ve ever encountered, and we’ve just met.”, she said in a defeated tone.
‘I’d like to take that as a compliment. Also means I live rent-free in your head.’
“Yeah yeah. Also, you got the reason for my demotion partially wrong. I’m allowed to meddle with the randomizer for the beta-tester’s benefit, but not to hasten their demise. I simply thought that you deserved to die quicker than most.” “ she said in an attempt at apathy for her situation.
‘Power tripping much? Also, I’m still partially correct.’, I said, rolling my eyes at her, or whatever the whale equivalent to that was. ‘Also, since we’re now pretty much on the same boat, why don’t you help me figure out how to get my fucking system to work?’
“I still want you dead. But my boss told me that if you performed well, he’d appoint me back to being a receptionist.” she contemplated.
‘Okaaay, but that information isn’t really helping me out right now. I only know that there’s a chance you might’ve slept with your boss, so if you can, tell me how to open the system, Sam.’, I said with mock importance.
“You’re an asshole, you know that?”
“Take’s one to know one.”
“Whatever. Fuck you. To open the system interface, just say “Open”.”
‘Alright. Thank you for finally being useful. Also, it’s not my fault you’re my assistant, you deserve it. Talk about poetic.’
“Just shut the fuck up and open the damn thing.”
‘Open’
Right then and there, it appeared before me in all its glory. The interface appeared as a translucent holographic display designed with sleek, futuristic elements that could only be described as game-like in nature. It emanated soft blue hues that shimmer softly in the water. It’s divided into sections displaying my current stats and abilities. It’s really here, the dream of all LitRPG enjoyers, my very own system interface. I’m so giddy right now I could die. Maybe not die, but I sure am excited. I could almost forget about my hunger. Almost.
I reviewed my race, stats, and skills; the things I really need to know right now. Although I could only guess at this point, but my stats seem to mirror my physical appearance, unlike some LitRPGs where the main character often leans to being skinny and buff while being an absolute tank. I don’t know as of now on how strong I really am in correlation with the numbers beside my stats, but I guess I could ask Sam more about that later, or I might just learn through experience. Either way is okay. I only have one skill at this point and it’s kind of a no-brainer on why I would have it, but it’s pretty useful so I don’t really care. I’ll get more later, hopefully. After scanning through the interface, I felt my stomach rumble again. Man, I’m hungry.
‘Close.’ The interface disappeared just like that. So it’s just “Open” and “Close”. huh?
“You done, shithead?” Sam said. Her lovely manner of speaking just feels so homely to me. It kind of even helps with my nerves too, if I’m being honest.
‘Yep, and I think it’s about time I stuff my belly.’
“You’re finally doing something smart for once in your life, congrats.” Her sarcasm dripped all over the sea floor.
‘Thanks, Sam.’
I scanned the glowing horizon for any potential prey. The bioluminescence of the creatures milling about is about to become my all-you-can-eat buffet. I wonder if I’ll start glowing too if I eat too much of these colorful bastards? Oh well, we’ll see if I even get to catch that many. All this thinking has taken way too long already.
It’s time to hunt.
Level: 1
Experience Points: 1/10
Race: Sperm Whale
Physeter macrocephalus
Stats:
Strength: 18
Dexterity: 10
Constitution: 14
Intelligence: 8
Wisdom: 9
Charisma: 12
Abilities:
Echolocation: Level 1
Description: Your keen sense of echolocation allows you to navigate through the underwater environment with ease, detect prey, and sense potential threats.
Range: 10 Meters