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VRMMO: Nerf The Archer!
Chapter 26: Bizarre Event

Chapter 26: Bizarre Event

A man with red hair and a man with no hair strolled down a wide cobblestone road, bordered on both sides by vibrant market stalls. The scene buzzed with activity; an effervescent orchestra of footsteps, chatter and laughter, while merchants yelled passionately over the din to advertise their wares to the passing crowds.

The two men spoke loudly in order to hear each other over the tumult.

“I wasn’t invited though. I know since I was watching your stream; that ‘Parker’ girl only invited you to meet the prince, not me. What if I try to enter and they behead me or something?”

“Do you think they’re barbarians? They’re not going to behead you for trying to enter a building. Anyways, I got a huge gold bonus from that mission you helped me with, which is why we’re at the market.”

“Bazaar.”

“What?”

“It’s a bazaar, not a market. It says right there.” Lemonade pointed to a nearby sign.

“...Never mind, I’ll just spend the gold on myself.”

“Wait, wait!” Lemonade hurriedly chased up to him. “What are we buying, anyways?”

“A lot of things actually.” Max counted with his hands. “Most importantly, we need nice clothes before meeting the crown prince. We also need supplies and new equipment; I’m still using the starter gear, so I need a better bow and some armour, or at the very least some bracers and gloves. Shooting without gloves is really uncomfortable.”

“I see...”

“We can also just get a bunch of stuff that grabs your eye. I think gold coins are of similar value to U.S. dollars, so that would mean I have around $50,000 on me right now.”

Lemonade choked. ‘Th-that much?’

—This is where the sugar in Lemonade comes from

—FULL PLATE LEMON! FULL PLATE LEMON!

—This makes no sense. Gold is supposed to be a rare and valuable metal. If you have this much of it circulating around, it’s just devalued completely; why didn’t the devs use copper, nickel or silver for low value coinage? Not to mention, gold is way too heavy to carry around in bulk. Realistically, nobody would be able to walk while holding that much of it.

—The previous commenter is a nerd

Max stopped at a booth with an orange awning, drawing Lemonade’s attention away from his chat.

“Hm? Did you find something good?”

“Hehehe.” Max did not elaborate and just showed him an item description.

Item: AP Arrow

Grade: Common

Weight: 50g (~770 grains)

Effects: +100% Penetration, +15% range, -50% damage, -50% bleed chance,

Description: A standard-issue armour-piercing arrow, fitted with a bodkin point arrowhead.

“Ooooo.” Lemonade was intrigued. “Are you going to use these against orcs?”

“For sure. If I had these when fighting that quasi-boss, he would’ve become Swiss cheese.”

“Nice. Are there more arrows for you to look through? Because if so, I might take a quick bathroom break.”

“Yeah, go for it.” Max replied nonchalantly.

Lemonade was about to log out but hesitated for a moment. “Don’t wander too far while I’m gone, or it will be hard for me to find you... and don’t start any wars, either.” He eyed Max suspiciously.

Max looked at him blankly. “How am I going to start wars in a market?”

“Bazaar.”

“...Just leave.”

Lemonade disappeared on the spot, causing a little boy who was watching to inadvertently tilt his ice cream in shock. Tragically, the top vanilla globule fell to the ground.

Feeling somehow responsible, Max approached to reimburse the damages, only for his attention to be jolted away by a piercing scream.

Alarmed, Max looked up to find the crowd quickly parting to either side of the bazaar. The street’s centre was quickly cleared out, giving him a clear view of the situation.

“HELP! PLEASE-SOMEBODY!!”

A small girl with pointy ears was running along the cobblestone while screaming hysterically. Two hooded figures chased her from behind with daggers, quickly closing the distance.

Attempting to stop them, one person with neon green hair, clearly a player, leapt in front of the pursuers while brandishing a sword. “Halt! Stop right there!”

The author's narrative has been misappropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon.

Ignoring his words, the robed figures ran either side of the player with their daggers. One deftly parried his sword, while the other sliced his neck open with a single clean strike. Defeated in an instant, the player exploded into particles.

‘!!!’

[ Proximity Mission: Save th-

Max quickly moved to act while ignoring his system interface, pulling out a vendor’s table and climbing atop to give himself a clear shot.

Squinting, he took aim at the assassins. Since they were about to run past him, their flank was exposed; he could try to disarm them.

Fwoosh!

An arrow accurately struck one of the daggers, knocking it out of the assassin’s grip and sending it flying off to one side. The blade span and slashed the adjacent wrist as it flew.

“EUH!” The assassin dropped his other dagger as he let out a high-pitched noise and stopped chasing the child, clutching his injured wrist in pain. Witnessing this, the fleeing child noticed Max and quickly ran over to him for protection.

Max nocked another arrow and switched his attention to the second assassin, who, upon seeing Max, immediately pulled a bystander into their embrace and charged at him, using the civilian as a human shield. Despite the added weight, they moved with incredible agility, likely to reach him in only a matter of seconds.

Gritting his teeth, Max also noticed the first assassin was now holding a strange flask.

‘It might be an explosive...’

Quickly weighing his options, Max decisively shifted his aim and shot the flask, making its contents splash out onto the street.

Just as he reached for another arrow, the charging assassin grabbed their shield with both hands. Eyes widening, Max threw himself to the side, while the human projectile shot past him into a stall’s awning.

Sliding along the ground, Max loosed an arrow at the assassin’s head. They instantly raised a metal vambrace on their arm to block it, undeterred as they continued sprinting his direction.

‘F-fast!’ Max was shocked at the sheer speed of the opponent.

As the assassin closed the distance, Max prepared to block their daggers but was vastly outpaced and met with a boot instead. Taking the full force of a heavy kick, he was launched into a wall on a diagonal, slamming against it and leaving a dent in the stone, before tumbling down and landing ungracefully on his side.

‘Ugh, f*ck that hurt. High level...’

[ Human: ‘????’, Level: 56 ]

Max managed to hold onto his bow during the impact. Drawing an arrow, he saw that the assassin was not coming to finish him off.

‘??’

Hearing a childlike scream, he quickly turned and aimed the other direction.

Fwoosh!

An arrow shot out to where the assassin was stabbing down at the child only a few metres away.

“AHH?!”

The arrow shredded into the assassin’s forearm, causing her to let out a pained female shriek, while the arrow’s momentum also threw off her aim, causing her dagger to sail past the child’s head harmlessly. The child took the opportunity to quickly run back to Max.

“FUCK!” The assassin turned and glared at Max murderously. Not giving him time to shoot again, she dashed over and brought her heel down at his head.

Barely blocking with his bow, Max twisted his head away as the assassin’s boot snapped the bow in half and smashed into the stone underneath, forming a small depression.

Wielding halves of a broken bow in each hand, Max dropped one and instead used the arm as a springboard. Pushing off the ground, he clobbered the assassin in the face, sending her reeling away to the side.

Picking himself up and taking a sword from his inventory, Max pulled the kid behind him and took a guard stance, ignoring his injuries.

“...” The assassin saw the sword and her eyes flitted to Max with a livid expression.

“Oy, everyone make way! The guard is here!”

“!!” Snapping back to focus, the assassin’s eyes cleared at the mention of guards, and she hurriedly distanced herself from Max, looking for an escape route.

“Over here!” Max called out. Grabbing a spear from his inventory, he threw it at the fleeing assassin’s back. Only piercing lightly, the spear did little to stop her as she ducked into an alley.

‘Armour? Damn...’

Max exhaled. That was a tough fight. The enemy had been several times faster and stronger than him due to her level. She was also highly skilled.

Casting his head back to the road, Max found that the other assassin was still there, lying on the ground motionlessly.

‘...Dead?!’

Rone had told him that NPCs did not turn to particles after death, so he had no way of knowing if the assassin was alive.

‘Did another player kill him?’

Max had only disarmed the guy, which meant that another player likely stepped in to finish the fight. Though, they didn’t seem to be there anymore, as the street was basically empty.

Hearing the sound of clattering metal, he turned to find a group of guards approaching, fully equipped with plate armour and polearms. First noticing the body, then spotting Max, the guards quickly approached and pointed their blades toward him.

“Drop the weapon!” The frontmost guard shouted.

“Oh.” Max realised he was still holding a sword and dropped it.

“Put your hands above your head!” The lead guard yelled. “Fighting in a civilian area is strictly prohibited. You will be taken in for questioning; do not resist.”

Max raised his hands while pointing. “Sir, the criminal is getting away! They ran down there.”

“We’ll deal with that later. For now...” the guard leader looked around, “did you kill that man?” He pointed to the fallen assassin, where a teal-coloured liquid was flowing along the ground.

“No, sir. I only disarmed him.”

“Hmm.” The guard grunted with uncertainty. “Regardless, we’ll find out later.” He signalled to one of his subordinates. “Cuff him.”

Watching the guard take a chained item out of his pocket, Max spoke with dismay, “Sir, with all due respect, there is an assassin running loose in the streets. Surely that’s a more pressing concern than questioning me?”

“Shut it!” He snapped hoarsely. “You accursed ‘heroes’ have caused me enough trouble today. You’re coming with me back to the station. Jerome, Quinn, you two bring the body. The rest of you, stay here and cordon off the area. I’ll be back soon.”

Sighing, Max looked around but found no sign of the little girl; she’d apparently run away.

“...Well this is annoying.” Max complained as he was led off the scene in shackles.

...

...

A minute later...

“Du du-du doo~” Lemonade mumbled some random song tune from his childhood as he logged back into the game, resuming his livestream.

‘What should I wear to the meeting? A dress shirt? A tunic?’ He pondered. ‘No, that’s too bland... I should wear a medieval jacket like a doublet or something. Ah, but I can’t take it too far or they might think I’m mocking their fashion sense...’

He loaded in.

“Well, I’ll just decide once I’m... there...”

The bazaar was empty. The hundreds of people who’d filled the area had all disappeared, instead replaced by a lone tumbleweed, which skittered slowly down the street in the whistling breeze.

“Eh, what...?”