Willow
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The surrounding darkness was complete and unbroken. It was also unmoving, unchanging, and still. Within the void, the inexorable march of time competed against the endless placidity of eternity. Upon finding herself here, Willow’s mind had been scattered and disoriented, panicked. Eventually, over the course of eons or seconds, her thoughts calmed and her memories settled. She remembered her fight, remembered her loss now. In fact, she’d remembered for what felt like forever, by this point.
Without a body, without light, without motion, the passage of time was a funny thing. While she could count, keeping beat with a steady cadence, eventually that grew tiresome and boring. Once, Willow had managed to count up to ten thousand and some change, before her mind drifted off for a period. Naturally, this broke her attempt to create a psuedo-clock to determine how long she’d languished here. The only company she had in this place were her thoughts and memories.
Besides failing to track the passage of time in some way, Willow spent a lot of time thinking. Reviewing the battle, she decided there was little she could have done differently. Could she have dodged, retreated, when it charged her? She didn’t think so. It had moved too quickly, she’d been taken entirely off guard. That’s something I could have done differently. She mused, feeling a touch of regret. She’d been so certain that the monster couldn’t move while her moment of focus ability was active and focused on the thing. It wasn’t clear whether her ability had been ineffective from the start, and it had simply pretended to lull her into a false sense of security, or whether it somehow grew resistant. The latter seemed more likely, given the ferocity with which it attacked at every opportunity.
Familiar impotent frustration and sorrow welled up, feelings which she might generally push down and avoid. Here, though, what was the point? She was alone with her thoughts and feelings, there was nothing to do to distract herself, no way to put distance between herself and the emotions. The discipline which she so prided herself in was released, letting the roiling feelings rush over her like a drowning tide.
Despite her lack of eyes, or any physical form, she wept. The sobs, wrenching and ragged broke the silence of the void. The build of of pressure fully broke through, tearing and ripping Willow’s psyche as surely as the monster had scrapped and broken her flesh.
Memories of faces from her life on Earth, smiling, frowning, scowling. Angry, happy, worried. Laughter, shouting, tension, soft whispers. Ma’ma, pa-paw, gram-gram, Coach, Vash, Whitney, James, Fenny, Mr. Joseph, and so so many more were gone. Learning, surviving, practicing magic, training, fighting, she’d used it all to distract herself. She didn’t want them to be gone forever. It wasn’t fair.
She’d been so close to her incredible comeback! Moments from victory, from showing the world just how strong she really was! Then she’d been given another chance. It wasn’t the same, she wouldn’t have any of her people to support her. She’d forced herself to take that, too, as a challenge. Despite everything pitted against her, she’d thrive. With a grand heap of delusion, she’d convinced herself everything would be fine. Every danger would be conquered! Every contest would be overcome! New friends would be made, new bonds formed! They wouldn’t replace her family and friends, nothing ever would. Loss wasn’t a new concept, she’d lost people before, she’d known she would again. All she could do was hold those lost near and dear, remembering them. Just like Tauna. Even now, remembering her childhood friend, taken too soon, felt like a surgeon’s knife cutting around numbed flesh. Distant, but there, and despite a lack of direct pain it ached.
The wave of memory and pain receded, for a moment, before crashing back down again. The helplessness of her first death, so fast and sudden that she hadn’t even felt it. Pulses of shame over the arrogance that lead to her last death. Anger at Madrick. At Nuu. At Jonah, Naomi, and the kobolds. Madrick had intentionally put her into a situation with no preparation. Nuu had made those stupid giants and hadn’t told her they’d turn into a compact killing machine upon death. The others had been too weak to even help.
Disgust blossomed within her, more anger. At herself. Her failure wasn’t anyone else’s fault. It was childish, blind, ungrateful, of her to think so badly of them. At least for her friends and the kobolds. They had been trying to help. Madrick was still a jerk who deserved a good kick, and Nuu… She didn’t know. Unnoticed, the tide had lapsed again, giving her room to breathe and reason.
It crashed back into her and she saw herself. Broken body, falling headless onto the battle-scarred earth. Blood pooling in pits formed by her and the monster’s hard landings and missed crashing blows. Unbidden, the footage she’d seen of her fateful injury on the bars. Flying through the air, alignment off just-so, missing. Crashing hard against the unforgiving metal, white bone breaking through her skin and jersey alike. Screaming. Weakness. Snippets of the following months came then, reminding her of her failure to control the anger and hopelessness within, despite knowing how. As a near adult, she had no excuse. Seeing the hurt on her friend’s face. The crushed expression on Jame’s face when she harshly rejected his invitation to a dance at his school, a rejection fueled by her own feeling of inadequacy. Replaying the slammed door as Whitney stormed out of her house, having been insulted by her supposed friend again.
Seeing them all standing around her in Austria, cheering her to victory. Still standing with her, despite everything. Despite her never giving them anything in return. She had been a terrible friend. Behind the images of her loved ones from Earth, Jonah and Naomi stood. Both ready to rush forward and help her as her fight against Jacques in the ring twisted into a bloody brawl with an eight limbed monster. Her friends and family all stood by her side, ready and willing to help. Then they all faded. Gone forever.
Willow’s scream of fury rocked the placid nothingness for but a moment, then she was left panting in silence again, tears and snot rolling down her face. What? Raising her right hand, Willow wiped the clean tears and disgusting mucus off. Moving the hand out, she kept it at eye-level. She squinted and, slowly, oh-so-slowly, her vision resolved smooth unbroken skin cladding fingers she’d always thought were just a bit too short. They were back-lit by an oddly familiar blue light. She looked up and saw the panel before her.
YOU DIED.
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You’ve been slain!
UNIVERSAL ACHIEVEMENT EARNED!
Name Everyone Dies Twice Description Die once to end your tutorial experience, die again for the first time in reality! Effect Ritual Activation Unlocked: Set Spawn Point.
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Respawn/Enter Tutorial(?)
The tale has been taken without authorization; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident.
Note: Respawning will reset you to rank 0. You will need to reform your insights and mana aspects, rebuild your skills, abilities, and techniques.
Staring at the screen for what felt like years, Willow hesitated. If I enter the tutorial… Would I see my family and friends again? The thought brought a small twinge of guilt, nothing compared to the tumult of emotions the reformation of her body and this prompt had pulled her from.
Focusing on the question mark beside “Enter Tutorial”, Willow read the tooltip. “Entering the tutorial will scrub all memories and experiences from your soul before entering it into a forming fetus at random.”
Well, that answers that. Knowing everything that made her who she was would be erased was more than enough. She chose “Respawn” and the darkness began to slowly resolve into a grey room.
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Naomi
Laying on the Ground, Foot of the Mountain, Savriâ
Having awoken to Jonah’s tear-stained face and a handful of annoyed looking kobolds, Naomi’s mind had raced to recall the moments before she’d lost consciousness. As soon as she’d put the pieces back together, she took Jonah’s hand and let him pull her up. Her first question had, logically, been, “Willow saved me?”
Expecting a nod, or even a sudden arm thrown around her shoulder as her gregarious friend appeared seemingly from nowhere, seeing Jonah’s eyes slide down to stare at his feet had been unanticipated. Looking around, she saw blood everywhere, but no bodies. The kobolds that had died were gone. The monster was gone, too.
“So the monster took her somewhere? What’s the plan to rescue?” She asked, concluding the incredibly fast creature had managed to capture Willow for some reason.
Slowly, Jonah’s head shook and he took a deep breath before slowly raising his head to look her directly in the eyes. That was odd, he usually looked at people’s nose, eyebrows, chin, or really anything other than their eyes. He spoke softly, carefully, “No. She… Killed it, but it got her, too.”
Ah, that seems like Willow. Beat the big bad boss, but get badly hurt in the process. She nodded, “So we need to find a healer or something? Her skill isn’t working?”
“No! I mean…” Anxiety was written large on Jonah’s face and he looked torn, before finally finishing lamely, “She’s dead, Naomi…” His voice choked, but he force himself to continue, “It killed her too.”
That… Seemed oddly unlikely. Naomi herself had been fairly certain that mouth-and-teeth faced monster was going to kill her, but once she saw Willow had arrived she knew everything would be fine. With the insane ability to just freeze other people in time that she had, it seemed incomprehensible that she could lose, much less die.
Slowly, she formed a frown on her face, wanting to show her lack of belief. Apparently it worked, since Jonah sighed softly and waved for her to follow. He lead her away from the battle-torn earth and kobolds softly talking, presumably mourning their dead. Plodding slowly as if each step was a made while carrying a mountain, Jonah made his way toward the nearest trap bunker building.
Laid out carefully in front of the building were dozens of bodies. In the middle, was a familiar figure. Usually vibrant amber-brown skin was dull and greyed, her head laid near her neck, but clearly detached. While her eyes were closed, the tension around her mouth and forehead still bore a concerned expression. Without her vibrant personality exuding from it, Willow’s body looked small. Diminutive, almost. Naomi rarely remembered that Willow was several inches shorter than herself, seeing her now though, she seemed so small.
Slowly, she made her way toward the body. Something within her demanded she make sure. After all, this was Willow. The girl who’d swept herself and Jonah out of nothing less of slavery, and by accident at that. The woman who’d destroyed dozens upon dozens of horrifying combined jimble-grimbs. The unbridled force of nature that could make even her smile. The first person in her life that didn’t try to tell her how to ‘fix’ herself, but encouraged her to become who Naomi herself wanted to be.
Standing over her friend’s corpse, she knelt and gently touched her face. This was real. There was no doubt. Turning her head and eyes up, she met Jonah’s dull stare and felt hot wet tears slowly leak from the corners of her eyes. Her soul pulsed in shades of twisted greens, grays, and black-blues.
Letting the tears flow freely, the colors coalesced into a star and she felt sorrow.
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Jonah
Standing Above Willow’s Body, Foot of the Mountain, Savriâ
The tears slowly forming in Naomi’s eyes were enough to break Jonah’s hold on his own shaking heart. He dropped beside her and joined her, they both cried for the loss. At some point, Jonah had pulled Naomi into a hug and they held each other.
Some time later, they broke apart and slowly pulled themselves together. Not sure what to say, but knowing he should say something, Jonah tried to channel some of the nonchalance Willow often wielded like a razor to cut tension. He failed and shut his hanging-open mouth.
Instead, he said what he’d been thinking since he first saw her fall and felt the pain of it. “We’ve hardly even known her for a month.”
“Less than.” Naomi agreed through a sob.
Sitting on the ground, near a bunch of corpses, Jonah cracked a wry smile, “Can’t say I’ve ever met anyone who altered the course of my life quite so directly before. I don’t think I’d have been fighting giants or exploring weird empty worlds without her.”
Nodding, Naomi pulled her legs up, wrapping her arms around her knees and resting her forehead on them.
They let the silence lengthen, both caught in their own thoughts and mourning.
“I don’t think I’ve ever had friends as close as you two.” Jonah said softly. Not thinking too much about his words, he continued, “I know Willow was like a magnet that held us all tight… But… I hope you still want to be my friend, too. I know it’s selfish to think like that, but… I can’t change what happened and I’m afraid to lose you, too.”
He cleared his throat, realizing what he’d said. He shut up. The thoughts had been voiced and he wouldn’t take them back, though he now felt awkward and embarrassed along with miserable. A gentle nudge from his right forced Jonah to look up and he saw Naomi’s shoulder pushed against his. She’d moved nearer to bump into him. Not saying anything, she just nodded into her knees.
Taking that as agreement, he remained silent and relived the adventure Willow had pulled them into.
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Several hours later, Halshath approached them. He turned his head to get a better one-eyed view of their pathetically hunched figures.
Sympathy coloring his voice, he asked, “First times losing someone in the real worlds?”
Neither spoke, but both nodded. He sighed, “It’s always hard to see a friend die, but you’ll see her again. Don’t be so down.”
Their heads both snapped around to look at him and he realized they had no idea. “Ah, no one told you, then? Death’s not permanent, just annoying. She’ll respawn back wherever your initial origin point was after given a week or two. All the progress she made on her path will be lost, but that’s just the price of death.” After a moment’s hesitation, he reluctantly added, “Unless she chooses to reincarnate into the tutorial. The only way someones truly dies for good is by givings up and going back in. Doing that means yous lose all your memories though, so most peoples don’t choose that with their firsts death. Not unless it was a downright torturous experience.”
Eyes full of confusion mixed hope stared up at him. Sighing, Halshath waved for them to get up, “Come ons. We needs to take care of the bodies befores they start stinking. You don’t haves to mourn like backs in your tutorial or anything, she’s fine.”
So, this wasn’t the end. Just yet another beginning.