One time, I got so drunk that I forged a wine bottle into a blade. I had no idea what I did or why, but it became a god grade item. Life is messy. Sometimes you’re the wine bottle, and sometimes you’re a godly blade. Just don’t be the god damned drunk that has no idea what’s going on, bahahaha!
~Goibniu, The God of the Forge and Brew
Crow wasn’t sure how long he was in that world of dark flames, but he felt as if he’d been burning in it for centuries. The unending pain. The visions of those he loved dying because he lacked the strength to save them. Seeing people taunt him who he had never even seen before. It did not relent for a moment.
“Shhh shhh, li’l brother. C’mon wake up for this mommy, please.” Mara was holding on to him when his eyes opened. His head rested in her lap, and she was wiping his face with a damp cloth. “He’s awake!”
Lonny and Ryan came running over, and Crow tried to move away from all of them. His Source ignited, and he stumbled back while quenching the power in him. He scuttled until his back hit a wall.
“S-stay. The. Fuck. Away from me.” He finally gasped out.
“What the hell?” Mara asked. “What happened to you?”
“As if you all don’t know. How much did they offer? How much was my life?”
“Get a hold of yourself,” Mara yelled back. “What the hell happened to you?”
“HOW FUCKING MUCH?” Crow screamed out his bottled rage, his eyes shifted to Lonny. “Tell me, was it worth it?”
“What is he talking about?” Mara looked alarmed, but Crow didn’t know if she was acting innocent, crazy, or really didn’t know.
“So it was you they wanted?” Lonny frowned and shook his head. “I doubt you’d believe me, but I didn’t have a choice. I did not know who they were after and hoped it was Aleg.”
“How about you two?” Crow’s eyes shifted to Mara and Ryan. “Which one was it?”
“Crow, it was just me,” Lonny said. “Don’t blame them.”
“Shut the fuck up,” Crow snapped and held up the half pendant the red-robed man gave him.
Mara’s face sank, and her trembling hand reached into her pocket. She pulled out her half pendant and knew it would match perfectly with the one Crow held. An unintelligible exclamation escaped her mouth.
“I-I-I didn’t—they-they told me it was so they could find me if something happened. Crow, it wasn’t—” Mara growled, and her rage surfaced. “This mommy is going to kill someone!”
Mara dropped her half of the pendant and ran off, but Crow saw tears in her eyes and felt guilty about accusing her—at least until his chest flared in pain. He coughed and tasted the coppery flavor of blood. Darkness struggled to retake him, but he stayed conscious.
“Damn, this is all fucked,” Ryan said. “Crow, what happened to you? How can I help? I don’t know what those two sons of bitches did, but I’ll help if I can.”
“Cursed,” Crow’s hoarse voice was sounding weaker to his own ears. “My Source is on fire. I can’t use it. It has crippled me. Token. In the tunnel. Send me back.”
“Fuck, man,” Ryan whispered and stood up, using his own Source and surprise momentum to strike Lonny across the jaw. The taller kid spun as he fell and then rolled a few times. “I hope you’re fucking dead.”
Lonny was still breathing. He knew his jaw broke and possibly had a concussion as his focus wavered. All he could see was Ryan standing over him, shaking with rage, and a finger pointed at his face.
“A curse?” Ryan growled. “Mara at least wasn’t aware of her actions, but you actually knew you were setting someone up. Why? Don’t fucking say your elders made you do it. Why the hell would you agree to this? Look at him? Look at what you did.”
“You wouldn’t understand,” Lonny said and sat up. He pushed his jaw into place and let his Source seal it enough that it would heal naturally. Then stood and walked back to his tent on wobbly legs.
“I am a fool to ever have looked up to you,” Ryan spat on the ground in front of Lonny before walking back to assist Crow. “Hey man, can you walk?”
Crow looked up with bloodshot eyes.
“Y-yes. Walk, but no Source. Can’t carry my pack,” Crow’s voice grew weaker. It wasn’t a guarantee that Ryan was an ally either, but he wouldn’t make it back on his own. Ryan at least hadn’t betrayed him yet, and if it came down to it, his movement ability didn’t require the Source, so he felt as long as they rested, he could escape.
Ryan nodded and went to pack up Crow’s stuff but left his weapons. After that, he went to pack his things while Crow undid the grill and wrapped it back up before stashing it away once more.
Moving took all his concentration. Only now he realized the Source existed in him all his life, but it required more mana to condense. In a way, that is what the White Lady did to him, infused his Source with an abundance of pure energy. The effortless way he drew on it for daily tasks was instinctual, ingrained, and undoing that habit was like breathing manually. It could be done, but the amount of effort was outrageous.
Even though he was sealing his Source as much as possible, it provided an endless amount of energy to that black fire burning inside him. Breathing alone brought mana into contact with his Source, so it was impossible to quench the fire. He couldn’t tell any of them that, tell them he was weak.
First, he grabbed up his weapons, the bow in hand, which he used as a walking staff, and the falcata strapped across his lower back so he could quickly draw it. All the while, he forcibly bore the pain, knowing it would exhaust him faster—he had little choice. Instincts screamed at him to escape. That danger was still present. He closed his eyes and tried to develop a breathing rhythm that minimized the pain as much as possible.
“What are you doing?” Lonny asked, standing outside his tent. Crow ignored him. “Are you two really leaving? Not talking to me?”
“I have nothing to say to a ghost,” Crow said with little emotion. It was the first time that Lonny felt a chill in his heart, but before he could respond, Crow left.
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Step after step, he walked up the steep incline, not waiting for Lonny to act. Ryan could catch up. Once he reached the valley’s exit, he stopped for a few minutes to catch his breath. It was there. He could sense the token lying on the ground at the bottom of the dip. It was impossible to see, but since they linked it to him, he could feel it.
Coughing once more, Crow bent over with his hands on the wall, trying to catch his breath. It was then that he saw the misting of blood on the stone and back of his hands. The problem was that most beasts could smell blood from a long way off, and it was still night for roughly another hour.
“Are you seriously okay with all this? And are you sure you want to leave?” Ryan asked after catching up.
“No, but I don’t have any choice. I’m too weak to be out here now, and I might invite disaster upon you. Help me find my token.”
“Why is your token here?”
“The man that cursed me said he’d leave it here. Death really might be a mercy, but as long as I have a breath in my lungs, I’ll fight.”
“Yeah, I know. Don’t worry, I won’t leave you until the end.”
Crow felt a piece of the ice in his heart melt a bit. He took out a bandage from his meager supplies and wrapped it around his mouth and face before pulling the hood up over his head.
“What are you doing?”
“Hopefully, containing the smell. I’m coughing up blood.”
“Seven hells, what kind of curse did they use on you?”
“No idea, but he begged me to choose death several times.”
“Wait, he gave you a choice? Why would you choose this?”
“Life gives opportunity. Opportunity will allow me to repay this enmity one day.”
“Heh, I don’t doubt that,” Ryan said. A dagger flashed in his hand as it stabbed right at Crow’s heart. “I really do like you, but I can’t let you leave here alive. It’ll be quick, I promise that.”
Crow drew the falcata in a flash and deflected the blade. Rather than stabbing his heart, it left a shallow cut on his arm. Without his Source, the movement only worked because of the hours of practice he put in to master this blade. His body reacted faster than his mind, and two more deflects later, he dropped the falcata, lacking the strength to hold it anymore. He could only watch as the dagger went for his heart once more.
“You fooled us all. Your skill with a blade is nearly that of your bow.” Ryan chuckled. “In the end, the result was the same—”
Ryan’s body jerked and spasmed as electricity coursed through him.
Crow spent a decade learning to fight, and this was an opening only a fool would miss. An arrow appeared in his hand, drawn so quickly from his quiver that even expert archers would feel shame at their lack of ability. His arm shot forward, ramming the arrow into that son of a bitch’s eye. Exerting all his strength and anger into that one strike until he felt the tip of the arrow strike against the back of Ryan’s skull.
He’d killed things in the past, but never a human. It was different and made all the more real when he felt Ryan’s hand trying to grip his shirt. It was only when the bastard’s body went limp, and the light faded from his remaining eye that Crow knew he’d killed someone.
“Oh…” It was the only thing he could say before stumbling back against the cave wall. His hands and body started shaking with an overwhelming intensity that induced nausea. Fire erupted within his Source. Darkness wanted to take him, but he could feel the bile rising. Hands franticly tore at his face, trying to remove the bandages before he drowned in his own vomit, but that attack took everything from him. Stumbling to his knees, his arms went limp.
Pain brought delirium and the smell of berries. His eyes moved upward, and he saw—
“Stop staring at this mommy’s chest, pervert,” Mara said in a quiet voice, her soft hands removing the bandages from Crow’s face.
He’d forgot about the electricity and knew she saved his life. Panicking, he pulled out of her grasp and turned to the side. The bile rose until he spewed the contents of his stomach onto the cave floor. After he stopped heaving, she held him once more, gently wiping his face clean.
“I didn’t know, please believe me,” her words entered his consciousness.
Crow handed her the half pendent the red-robed man gave him and kept the one Mara had.
“Wha-what is this?”
“My half… So. Always find. You.” Talking hurt.
Mara’s tears fell from her face, and she hugged Crow to her bosom. Her sobs echoed in the passageway.
“Y-your going. S-s-squeeze me to death,” Crow mumbled and realized the berry smell came from her soft silky flesh. With her breasts smashed against his face, he smiled and felt relaxed. “But… smothering me with your breasts is the best way to kill this daddy.”
Mara sputtered and then laughed. “You are still a pervert.”
“Pfft, who stripped naked to take a bath with me?” He coughed, laughed, and cried at the same time.
“You believe me?”
He nodded, his face still smashed between her breasts.
“Some things can’t be faked, like this wonderful softness that is threatening to smother—” Mara’s hand had reached down and grabbed his third leg, and her grip was as firm as it was domineering. “Eeeeee, yes. Yes, I believe you, let go!”
Crow felt a cold sweat on his brow as her hand moved away from a place it should never have been. She was as bold now as ever, this more than anything, is why he believed her.
“Now, find your token, and send you back.” Mara helped him search, and Crow found it sitting on a flat rock out in the open.
“W-what do we do about him?” Crow pointed at Ryan, who still had Crow’s arrow sticking out of his eye hole.
“Let him rot here for the beasts,” Mara spit on his corpse. “I-I’ve never seen a person killed before, and I’m freaking out a little. Will we get in trouble?”
“I killed him. Not you. Remember that.” Crow coughed a few times. “Mugna is on my side. But… could you drag him out into the forest? It’d be best if no one could recover his corpse. And I’d prefer to keep this valley safe for future generations.”
“How did it feel? To kill?”
“Awful,” Crow said with tears stinging his eyes. “I keep remembering all the jokes and pranks and laughter from the last month and just don’t understand. I thought we were friends.”
Mara said nothing more and decisively dragged the corpse out of the cave tunnel. While she did that, Crow laid back and blacked out for a time. He woke with his head cradled in her lap again.
“Can I ask something before you go back?” Mara questioned softly.
“Sure.”
“Why? Why are people trying to kill you?”
“I… am not sure about the clans. The Rulaney woman that forced my Source to awaken claimed they saw a calamity, and I was the cause. In truth, I think it’s all related to Gideon, my maternal grandfather. And I’m sure all my enemies know I’m unfated. As I told you, the heavens won’t allow me to exist. It is why they used both you and Lonny to find me, and Ryan to make sure I was dead.”
“Why a curse, though? And what does that even feel like?” Crow felt hot tears on his face again and looked up to see Mara visibly upset. “I-you-you cried out in your sleep.”
“The red-robed man that cursed me found out that Gideon was my grandfather, and I don’t know. Maybe it was out of guilt he let me live. He gave me a choice, death or a fate worse than death.”
“Why are you so damned stubborn?”
Crow smiled up at her. “I wanted a chance to live. I took it. Imagine how devastated you’d have been if I died. This daddy can’t allow that.”
“Pfft.” She leaned down, strands of her hair brushed his cheek, and then her warm lips pressed against his. For a moment, Crow forgot all about his pain. “I’ve wanted to do that for a while now. I felt obligated to refrain because of my sister and clan. But fuck them. This mommy is going to pummel all those old monsters for making me part of their plot.”
“This curse is a black fire that devours mana. It surrounds my Source and roasts my soul. You do not know how much our Source leaks energy. Those leaks feed the flames. I’ve tried to seal it as much as I can, but it invades my body and mind, and as you saw, my dreams.”
Crow stopped talking and reached up to wipe Mara’s tears away.
“Why don’t you hate me?” She said through her soft sobs, and her fists beat down on his chest.
“This daddy trusts his woman.”
“Pff, whose your woman, you little pervert!”
“Says the one that grabbed my—mmmffmm.” Crow’s voice was cut off as her hand covered his mouth. Crow smiled at her tear-streaked face as she tried to assert her dominance. It was a tune they’d both danced to for the past month. Even with how it ended, he was glad most of his memories were with this woman who obviously cared about him. The excursion wasn’t a total waste.
Mara reached down and squeezed Crow’s hand. Inside of it, the token snapped. Surprised, he looked up to see she was still crying. As he faded away, he could hear her speak one last time.
“We might not see each other again. My clan will most likely lock me away. I’ll miss you.”
Crow couldn’t stop it, and the space tunnel took him away before he could reply.