Maya Starborn, harpy trickster, followed Sevard through the broad plains of Zone Five.

Her luck was currently -24, having rolled poorly upon logging in. At least it was slightly better than her first roll, (a -26.) -14, plus the -10 penalty for rolling twice, meant she’d have a moderately bad day, but still could gain some benefit from the local creatures.

But since Sevard had rolled even worse (-55, before penalties) she was the designated looter for anything they managed to kill. At least the zone was within Sevard’s level range, even if Maya could never have survived more than a few minutes here on her own. Their combined misfortune made for several less than pleasant encounters. They wiped four times, forced to respawn back at the leypillar, before finally making their way to the eastern ocean.

Here, Maya hesitated for a long, long moment. She’d been making good headway facing her fear of heights, but that was a long quiet phobia. Drowning, that was a harsher, more visceral panic that she’d yet to overcome.

The ocean rolled against the beach in steady rhythms, and Sevard waded out toward the submerged rocky outcrop that contained his tier trial. He paused to wait for her, treading water just beyond the dropoff.

"It’s not real," Maya said. "It doesn’t matter."

Sevard nodded.

"It doesn’t matter if I drown, I’ll just respawn." She felt the tightness in her voice, could barely force the words out. Even though she knew it was true, part of her rebelled. Instinct screamed for her to back off, to run away, to hide.

Maya flicked her palm. It didn’t help. This wasn’t a simple meandering mental spiral she could snap herself out of, it was a direct response to the stressor staring her in the face.

She paced the edge of the water, wondering how things had come to this. She hadn’t been this afraid before. What had changed?

"You coming?" Sevard called.

Maya grabbed onto that, focused on his voice, his presence. This was why they’d come. She was here for him.

What she wanted didn’t matter. This was her chance to do something worthwhile. To be of help to someone besides herself.

Helping Sevard was more important than her comfort.

She closed her eyes and dove forward, feathers dragging awkwardly through the water until she streamlined her body. Something brushed her hand and she blinked, startled, but it was only Sevard. She nodded and swam after him, letting him tug her the right direction.

She needn’t have worried. He’d lent her his best control-statted items for the trip - well, the best items she could equip at her level - which helped her hold her breath far longer than usual.

They reached the underwater door, which Sevard opened, and stepped through into the trial rooms beyond. Letting out her breath, Maya stood for a long moment, just breathing and trying to calm her racing heartbeat. It felt ridiculous that so much of her physical reaction to panic had been programmed in to such a realistic extent, but three hundred plus years of development could do amazing things. Even if some nuances of physical reality had yet to be fully realized.

Sevard waited patiently without trying to rush her, though she knew he had a busy schedule.

The beautiful room helped steady her, as she lost herself in tracing the subtle patterns in the marbled crystal. Or was it salt? She couldn’t tell.

"I’m ready," Maya said at last once she’d regained a semblance of calm.

She followed Sevard through the half-remembered rooms of previous tests he’d already overcome, then to the riddle door. He started to set out his collection of tiles, but Maya held up a hand to stop him. "I’ve got my own."

"Will they work in my trial?"

Maya shrugged. "Won’t know until we try."

She stepped up to the door and noticed at a glance that the middle tile indentation was different than the others. Deeper. Darker. That was the right spot. She withdrew her black star tile - the special trickster tile that, as far as she knew, only one other player had access to - and pressed it into the door.

Override accepted. Continue with unlock?

Maya grinned. Yes.

The door hummed loudly, vibrating and hissing, then shattered into splinters. Maya’s black star riddle stone fell to the ground in the midst of a cloud of dust and stone fragments. Blueish mist drifted out in lazy curls.

Sevard stared at her.

Maya self-consciously retrieved the stone and put it back in her inventory.

"You did it," he said, unnecessarily.

Maya nodded. She swept one arm out in a dramatic gesture, feathers trailing. "After you."

Sevard started forward, then paused. "Maybe you should wait here."

"Probably," Maya agreed. The tier trial was intended for characters about to reach level 40. She wouldn’t last long at all. "Good luck!"

Sevard nodded, then hesitated.

"I’m going to try rerolling."

"Again?"

"I can’t go at this at -60."

Maya shrugged. "Okay. But I reserve the right to mock you if it ends up being worse."

Sevard rolled his die, and groaned.

"What is it?" Maya asked.

"… -79. Before penalties."

She burst out laughing. "Hah!"

Sevard rolled again. "Hmm."

"Now what."

"Plus two, so … minus eighteen."

She shrugged. "Could be worse."

"Not good enough."

"Wait, wait—"

He didn’t wait. "There’s no way I’ll roll badly six times in a row." He tossed the die. Then groaned, and immediately rolled it again.

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Maya grabbed at his hand to stop him. "Don’t!"

He laughed. "Hah! 41. Now I’m going in."

"That’s—"

He grinned, saluted, and then advanced through the drifting haze to the next room.

Maya waited. Whatever lay beyond, she knew she couldn’t help any further. Her stone only worked on riddle doors, and with her luck in the negative today it would only make his task harder if she tried to help.

She wandered about, examining the architecture of the trial room previous to the puzzle door. Depictions of landscapes ran along the wall, engraved in exacting detail. She ran a hand across the leaves of a carved tree, feeling the texture of each vein. There was probably a way to solve the door properly with the clues provided, but she couldn’t think how.

In fact, now she paid attention, she felt a bit … off. As though her mind were fuzzier, her thoughts less clear. She’d been so immersed in the chaos the first time around, she hadn’t realized the tangible impact of luck. Now, after having spent a few weeks as the absolutely stable Mayon, it showed in sharp distinction.

She wasn’t sure she liked it. She knew the vivid clarity of thought and sharpness of intuition that came with high luck, but she had never really considered its inverse. Last time she’d had extremely low luck for any length of time, she’d spent most of it as a prisoner. She hadn’t really had anything to think about.

CONGRATULATIONS! ERROR! Levels 40-49 unlocked. ERROR! Secondary class unlocked. Physical Augmentation unlocked. Resistance unlocked. ERROR! Innate bonuses have increased.

Maya blinked in surprise at the window hovering in front of her.

"It’s safe, you can come in now!" Sevard shouted, sounding gleeful.

Maya hurried forward, checking her character sheet as she did. Innate bonuses increased was right. All her modifiers were huge! Every stat had a bonus of at least +5, int was +10, and momentum +23?! Granted, that was nothing compared to high-level equipment bonuses, but it was still enough to significantly increase her health, energy, and stamina. From [280 to 320]! That would add some survivability.

"You did it?" Maya asked, dismissing the windows to return to the cloud of similar windows that waited barely visible at the edge her peripheral vision.

"Level 40!"

"Congrats."

"It’s all thanks to you!" He picked her up, spun her around, and grinned widely enough that his fangs showed to their full extent.

She often managed to ignore his glowing eyes and pretend that her friend and ally wasn’t a vampire, but right now his fangs were very visible and very close to her neck.

Stupid prejudice. But she still felt the briefest flicker of concern before she managed to shove it away, her heart still beating just a little too fast.

Then Sevard set her down, grinned, and passed her a Dust of Recall.

"So, now you’ll come to the crystal desert?" Sevard asked, grinning.

"No. Level 40 isn’t even close to good enough."

"Domitius would be happy to take me."

"Then go. You’re not required to follow me around, watching out for me."

Sevard shook his head. "Domitius isn’t fun to work with. Except when I really need the money, I’d rather lem with you."

"Lem?"

"You know, lem. What we’ve been doing. Work together. Talking. Remain in company."

"Like lemmings?"

"Naa… no, I don’t believe it has anything to do with lemmings. It’s more…" he tapped his hand rapidly, staring off. "Tack. Hold together." He shook his head. "That’s not the point."

"Right. I don’t disagree with your assessment of Domitius, but you shouldn’t feel obligated—"

"What’s it going to take to stop you talking down about yourself so much?" Sevard interrupted before she could finish. "You’re no worse than anyone else. Beating yourself up over every little mistake will only make you miserable."

"If I let myself not care, then nothing will ever change."

"And is that so bad?"

Maya stomped one clawed foot irritably. "Yes! I can barely stay focused long enough to finish a quest, and I hate it! I have all this to explore, and instead I’m stuck being useless by my own stupid brain. And it’s not even my real brain any more!"

"Is there any reason not to simply explore as you wish?"

Maya frowned uncertainly.

"Is there really anything wrong with starting a quest only to abandon it when something more interesting comes along? This isn’t your job; it’s just a game. Why shouldn’t you play it the way that brings you most enjoyment?"

"Because I can’t. Not for long. I have lists in my mind, obligations I’ve promised myself, and if I leave them for too long they build up and weigh on me."

"Why?"

"Well, how else would I get anything finished? If I didn’t care about what I’m doing, why bother?"

"Exactly."

Maya shook her head. "I … what?"

"You don’t have to do what anyone wants. You don’t have to feel committed to anything. You can just be free. Wander the world. Explore what you want. Do quests, don’t do quests; it doesn’t matter. It’s your life."

"But I’m a trickster. That kind of power comes with obligations. Responsibilities to use it meaningfully."

"Does it? Or does it just give you the option to have fun in a different way?" Sevard held his hands out to either side. "I’m a trickster. You don’t see me running myself to insanity fulfilling obligations to anyone. Domitius tried to recruit me for his new project a dozen times so far and isn’t likely to stop anytime soon. But am I off with him? No, I’m here with you. Because we aren’t slaves, we aren’t zealots, and we can make up our own minds."

"It’s different for you. You have obligations and jobs on other worlds. This is your place to come relax. To you, World 9352 is a real game. But me, I live here."

"Then go somewhere else. If you can’t see the game for the quests, then maybe it’s time to cut your losses and pick a different world. Do you like the fantasy genre, or would something else suit you better?"

Maya shook her head and threw the Dust of Recall into the air before her, stalling by stepping into its glittering field. She’d be immobile for 30 seconds until the transit activated and returned her to the zone’s leypillar.

She didn’t want to leave. She’d only just arrived. World 9352 had so much left to explore. She had barely scratched the surface of its potential. It had been barely a month since she first appeared here, confused and lost. But she’d survived. She’d made friends, enemies, alliances. And she didn’t truly want to walk away from it all. She still felt obligated to carry through.

Her halted step completed on the leypillar’s arrival platform, and Sevard appeared a few seconds after.

"I’m going back to the academy," Maya said. "I’ve been away for too long."

Sevard smiled. "Good. I’ll let Lucy know where to meet you. She’s been helping me with a side project, but I think she’d enjoy the chance to relax a bit now that I have a whole new tier of levels to grind."

Maya felt an irrational twinge of envy. She knew she couldn’t expect to monopolize all of Sevard’s free time, but she’d gotten used to feeling like she was something special. Apparently she was merely one of his side projects.

With a forced smile she nodded in farewell, then Sevard logged off and she tapped the leypillar to transit back to Kalyx city.

She’d gotten used to Mayon’s shorter stature and it felt strangely empowering to stride through the city gates at her normal, average height. She glanced at the leaderboard and quest board out of habit, but nothing stood out to her. Shardlord remained at his second-place position, between Domitius at level 53 and Cydrin at level 51. He hadn’t logged out again, then.

Maya wasn’t sure how to feel about that. He’d always acted oddly demanding toward her, as though expecting her to be someone she wasn’t. He’d implied she was a spy for Domitius, and come close to banning her completely. That ban had ended up being revoked or overlooked in the chaos surrounding the unlock of the new zone, and the factions’ near-simultaneous Conquest of each other’s bases - which Maya still didn’t understand the reasoning for.

But now her feet had carried her unerringly to the mage academy entry arch, and the time to reconsider had passed her by.

For a moment she simply stared, feeling oddly nostalgic and possessive as she gazed at the familiar courtyard. Straight ahead, in the center of the academy grounds, stood Shardlord’s crystal tower. Arrayed around it were the other buildings - five-story Diamond and Sapphire halls for student lodging; the low dining hall with its attached kitchen; two- and three-story Opal and Ruby and Emerald, where classes took place. A few others whose use she didn’t know.

Stepping inside felt like coming home after a long trip. Which, she supposed, it was.

No guard stepped forward to forbid her, releasing a tension she hadn’t recognized until it vanished. She had been gone for a long time. It would have been within Shardlord’s rights to send her packing.

"Maya?" an unfamiliar voice called.

Maya turned. A garden area had been set up beside the outer wall, with walking paths and benches. A tall harpy man with turquoise feathers stood up, folding a book closed as he did so. He set it down, then strode toward Maya with an eager smile. She’d been around enough harpies not to be too confused by the way their beaks could distort almost cartoonishly to form common expressions - she knew her own did the same - but it still took a moment to mentally adjust.

She didn’t recognize him, which meant he was probably new.

"Yes, I’m Maya," she admitted. "Do you have a spell for me to look over? Today isn’t a good day, but I’ll file it for—"

He grabbed her in a strong, unhesitating embrace, wrapping his feathered wing-like arms around her.

Maya tensed. "Um, excuse me— uh, have we met?"

He released her and stepped back at once. "Oh, I’m so sorry. Of course. It’s me, Darrow! I’m sorry I made you wait so long to come."

Darrow advanced as though to resume hugging her, and Maya stepped backward hastily. "Ah, please slow down a bit. I don’t remember anyone named Darrow."

He stopped dead, looking as though she’d just broken his heart. "You— you don’t remember me?"

"Um, should I?"

"Darrow Miskell. Your husband."

Wait …

...

what?!

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