Chapter Six: Every Puzzle Has an Answer.
As soon as they passed through the entrance, it was clear what type of establishment this was.
Two young women immediately greeted them as soon as they entered, bowing deeply. They were both dressed in maid outfits.
The room itself was rather unremarkable. It looked like some old office that had been converted into a cafe, which in fact, it was. The boring, plain walls were offset with cheap patio furniture. Frilly tablecloths and fake flowers attempted to create an ambiance, but it was clear that the highlights of the establishment were meant to be the staff.
As they entered, the two maids addressed them both in Japanese in unison.
「Welcome back, Dear Customer,」 Trash cringed at the trite greeting. He hated coming to these types of places, but it was often a necessity considering his regular clientele.
Unlike many of the typical customers who frequented maid cafes, Trash had no nostalgic fetish for bourgeois customs. The standard greeting of all Akihabara maid cafes was meant to give the socially awkward target customers a feeling of a warm home, perhaps mimicking an adoring family. Trash had no such memories, even from his earliest childhood. To him, family had always been a burden, a sentiment that was shared by every blood relation he had ever met. The ubiquitous greeting, “Welcome back,” carried no more authenticity to him than the assignment of the title “Dear Customer.”
He knew these girls did not consider themselves servants any more than they saw him as anything more than a cheap mark. Some pathetic loser who came to these places to pay someone just to treat him with anything other than disgust and disdain. Trash knew that under their fake manners and hollow words, these were the type who would move across the carriage if he sat next to them on the train. But here, where they were paid to do so, they called him “Dear Customer” and pretended he was anything but the loser they saw him as.
“So, finally a maid cafe, huh?” Danny asked Trash.
“Not just any maid cafe. This is The maid cafe. The Cure Maid Cafe. The one that started it all,” Trash explained.
One of the maids smiled at his words, surprising Trash. She must have understood his English. That was not something he would have expected from these girls, but giving it some consideration, they might be getting more foreign customers these days. Maybe she was the one tasked with serving non-Japanese guests.
She addressed Trash and asked if they were there to eat, or just have a drink. He indicated that they were just there for a coffee. She smiled and led them to a table by one of the few windows at the end of the room.
She brought over two more chairs and some baskets to put Trash’s backpack and the shopping bags into. As they sat down, she produced two single-page menus. Trash noticed that the one she handed to Danny was written in English.
She gave them both an appraising look, then spoke to them in clear and unaccented English.
“Thank you for visiting the Cure Maid Cafe. I hope you will have a pleasant visit. This is the cafe menu, but if you would like to order a meal, I can bring the restaurant menu. I apologize for the impertinence, but as we can be busy, we ask that you limit your visit to one hour so that other customers may have a turn. I will be back in a moment to take your orders.”
Bowing deeply to them, she backed away from the table several steps before turning around and walking back to the entrance of the cafe.
“So, this is what all the fuss is about? I dunno, it’s not quite what I was expecting. It feels more laid back? Less J-Pop anime crazy than the rumors,” Danny mused.
“Oh, they have those too. I just can’t stand them. Also, they have a seating charge. This is the famous one, though. The original Akiba maid cafe. Mostly, people like it because of the uniforms.”
Danny raised his eyebrow at that explanation.
“The long skirt traditional maid costume. Some guys go nuts over them. Those new trendy places are like hostess clubs. Lacy mini-skirts and pre-school games with the customers. Cure Cafe at least has some sense of professionalism and pride. Well, they still do Moe-Moe-Kyun, but they don’t send the girls out to draw in customers off the street.”
The menu was simple, with coffee, tea, and some simple cakes. When they had decided on what to order, the waitress appeared before they even turned to look for the staff.
“Have you decided on your order?”
“Yes, I’ll have a coffee set with the cheesecake, and he will get the coffee set with…” Danny tried to remember what Trash had picked.
“Mont Blanc, with iced coffee.”
She nodded, then repeated back their order.
“One coffee set with cheesecake. Hot coffee. One set with Mont Blanc and iced coffee.”
After receiving their confirmation, she backed away from the table again before turning and walking into the kitchen.
Letting out a deep breath, Danny slumped a bit in his chair.
“Thanks, Trash. This has been fun, but I’m wiped out. Probably the jet lag.”
Trash nodded but didn’t know what else to say. Then Danny sat back up and leaned over the table.
“So, you think you can save this deal?”
With a furrowed brow, Trash thought over his plan again.
“I don’t know. I’ll try. I know someone, well, I know someone who knows someone. Maybe they can arrange the cash. I’ll talk to my contact today and see if I can arrange a meeting.”
Frowning, Danny considered this for a moment.
“How much more is this going to cost?”
“I don’t know. This is new for me,” Trash explained. He didn’t like admitting that he was clueless here. It felt unprofessional. Still, he was already well outside of his comfort zone. If he weren’t so desperate now, he would just as soon walk away from the whole deal.
Danny looked thoughtful, then glanced at the bag holding the white boxes in the basket beside the table.
“Alright. I’m bumping your commission up to 15%. But any other costs come out of your cut. Good?”
1.5 million yen; Trash was stunned. Still, he had to bear all the expenses. Who knows how much it would cost to get someone to front the cash? Maybe 200 thousand? No, 300 thousand seemed reasonable. He was just guessing. There was a real risk, and he didn’t know what he was getting into.
“I don’t have the money to pay upfront.”
“That’s fine. If it comes to it, I can get some cash, at least. Here.”
Pulling wallet from his jacket, Danny counted out twenty-five of the 10,000 yen traveler’s checks.
“Here, you can use these to cover your expenses for now. I’ve got more back at the hotel, so you can take all these. I won’t even include it in your 15%.”
The offer made it hard to focus. Trash couldn’t believe what he was hearing. An extra 250,000 yen. That’s 1.75 million yen minus whatever it costs to get the cash. His hands were sweating, and his head was spinning. He could feel the greed inside him aching to reach out and grab the pile of paper on the table.
“I’m terribly sorry, Dear Customer. The Cure Maid Cafe is unable to take payment in the form of traveler’s checks or credit cards. Please forgive us for our inability to offer this service, Dear Customer. I beg your understanding in requesting payment in cash or JCB shopping vouchers.”
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Both men were surprised to see the waitress carrying a tray containing their orders in both hands. Danny quickly grabbed the bills and guiltily shoved them back into the wallet.
Trash nearly had a heart attack. He had not seen her until she had spoken. How much of their conversation had she heard?
With practiced ease, the waitress deftly shifted the tray to hold it entirely with one hand, then proceeded to serve them, first by placing the cakes in front of them, then a glass containing iced coffee in front of Trash and a fragile-looking porcelain cup full of black coffee in front of Danny. Finally, she placed a small pot full of cream and another glass with small tubs of syrup sweetener in the center of the table.
Holding the now empty tray against her chest, she bowed deeply again and took one step back. Then she stopped.
Trash turned to look at her. The first time he had dared to make eye contact.
She spoke again. In English to both of them.
“Forgive me for saying something unnecessary. If you need, the post office bank should be able to assist you with cashing those traveler’s checks.”
The two men looked at each other. Still processing the situation and the information shared by the girl wearing a stuffy British maid costume, Trash nodded and thanked the girl in English.
“Thank you.”
Before she could back away, Danny spoke to her.
“Sorry. Do you think I could borrow a pen?” He asked sheepishly.
“Certainly, please wait a moment,” she said as she backed away and disappeared.
“Damn, is she some kind of maid ninja?” Danny asked half-joking.
“I didn’t even notice her sneaking up on us, did you?”
Trash shook his head.
After a moment, she returned and placed a pen in front of Danny with the same care she had shown with the tray full of cups and plates.
Quickly getting to work, Danny started scribbling on the backs of each of the slips of paper. Then he shoved them all back into the wallet and handed it over to Trash.
“Here.”
Carefully accepted the wallet, Trash took it gingerly in his hands. He examined the bundle like it was a fragile, hand-built model kit. The wallet was actually a small, bill-sized envelope, large enough to fit currency bills without folding them. It was made of a thin leather and there was a small magnetic flap that closed to seal them in. It appeared brand new, so it was something likely purchased just to hold these checks, but it was much fancier than something the bank would give you to hold money when you withdraw it. Holding it in his hands, he thought the wallet alone probably cost more than 10,000 yen. He wondered if Danny would want it back.
“Now that you’ve taken all my money, you’re going to have to pick up the check for this, though,” Danny said, motioning to the food and drink spread across the table.
“Oh, and I’m going to need some help getting back to the hotel, too,” Danny said with a mischievous grin.
Anxiety returned as Trash instinctively started to add up the costs in his head.
As if reading his mind, Danny smiled, then let slip a horrifying grunt-like giggle. This time, Trash couldn’t help but visibly wince, but Danny didn’t seem to notice.
Taking a bite of the cake, Danny washed it down with a sip of coffee. Then he immediately opened up two tubs of clear liquid sweetener and filled the cup to the brim with creme.
“Cake’s not bad, but the coffee…”
Trash took a sip of his iced coffee through a straw, then just as quickly added sweetener and creme to his own glass.
As they ate, they talked about the different things they had done that day. Danny asked more questions about how the box stores worked and what other kinds of stores they had in Akihabara. Trash did his best to explain what he could, though he admitted that he wasn’t much of a tour guide.
After they had finished eating and resting, they grabbed their things and walked over to the register where the waitress was waiting for them. Trash fished his wallet from his backpack and slowly counted out the bills to pay for their food. It wasn’t that much, but he was loathe to part with any cash these days. She counted out the coins for his change and placed them into a small tray that she pushed forward.
“You should give her a good tip!” Danny advised.
He understood the concept, but no one tipped in a cafe in Japan. That was a thing they do in other countries. He was about to protest, but then he remembered the leather wallet full of checks in his backpack. He decided to suck it up, and from the coins he had received back, he selected the largest one. A 500 yen coin. It represented almost a quarter of their entire bill! It nearly caused him physical pain, but he placed the coin on the tray and then pushed it back to the waitress.
He half expected her to protest and refuse the money, but instead, she just smiled and bowed deeply. As her head lowered, Trash was sure he caught her giving him a wink, but he was probably imagining it.
“Alright. Stop flirting with the maids,” Danny scolded playfully while pushing him out the door.
They stepped into the elevator and the waitress stood in the doorway. As the doors closed, she bowed deeply once more.
「We eagerly await your next visit.」
Maybe this cafe wasn’t so bad, Trash thought to himself as the elevator slowly crawled down to the ground floor. Then again, 1,150 yen for a drink and cake set was extortionist pricing. That was almost enough to get three beef bowls at Yoshinoya. Well, if he had to pick a place for a business meeting in the future, maybe this wasn’t such a bad place.
As they exited the gatchapon maze, Danny spoke.
“Alright, I’m done. I gotta get some sleep.”
Trash nodded.
“What hotel are you staying at?”
“The Victoria. Near Tokyo Station.”
“You want a taxi?”
“Actually, do you think I can get there by train? I’ve always wanted to ride the famous Tokyo trains. Do they really have guys who shove you into the cars?”
Trash smiled and chuckled.
“Yeah, but not here, and not now. It’s a morning rush hour thing, and only at the outer stations. All the worker ants trying to get to the office at the same time. At this time of day, it’s not that crowded. Besides, Tokyo station is just a few stops away.”
Pulling out his phone, Trash checked the map application and looked up the hotel.
“Oh, it’s right next to Yurakucho station. You can just take the Yamanote line four stops,” he explained.
“I’ll show you how to get to the station.”
They walked back down the main street, then into the station. Trash realized that he would also need to help him with the train, so he went over to the ticket machine.
He pondered buying a one-use ticket but decided a more robust solution was warranted. Digging through his bag, he found his wallet again and, flipping through a thick stack of cards inside, pulled out a green and grey card.
Shoving it into one of the ticket machines, he checked the value remaining on the card. The display read 920.
That should be enough. Thankfully, he wouldn’t need to recharge it, and the balance was enough for four to five local rides. Luckily, he always carried a few of these cards around. He found them a convenient way to carry cash and over time, had collected half a dozen extra, unlinked cards. More than once, he had resorted to taking payment via a credit card charge directly to one of these prepaid train passes. While it was easy to charge them up with a credit card using a ticket machine, it was a pain to get the money out in cash, so he had vowed only to use this method in case of emergency.
Retrieving the card from the ticket machine, he handed it to Danny. Pulling out another card, he walked to the ticket gate and swiped his card over the reader. He walked through, then motioned for Danny to follow.
Danny swiped his own card, then came through the gate.
“Not bad. Good, efficient system,” he said with admiration.
“You just swipe again when you exit. It will automatically calculate the fare. There should be enough money in it for at least four rides within Tokyo. If you need to, you can even top it up with a credit card at one of those machines. There is a limit though, I think you can only put in up to ten or twenty thousand yen at a time.”
“Damn, handy little things,” Danny turned the card around in his hands.
“You can also use them to buy drinks from the vending machines in stations,” Trash said, pointing to one of the many machines scattered throughout the building.
“Really?”
Before Trash could respond, Danny ran over to a nearby vending machine. After studying the offerings for a minute, Danny hit the button below a bottle of Pocari Sweat. There was a beep, but nothing happened.
Trash pointed to the sensor below the coin slot. Danny swiped the card, and the machine made a whirring sound followed by the thunk of a bottle landing in the receiving tray.
Grinning like a schoolboy, Danny reached down into the machine and pulled out the bottle.
“Awesome. I see the ads all over and was wondering what this was,” he exclaimed as he twisted off the cap and took a swig of the cloudy white liquid.
With a slightly confused look, Danny swished the drink around and then swallowed.
“Not sure if I am tasting the Pocari or the sweat.”
Trash rolled his eyes at the old joke. He pointed out the escalator to the southbound Yamanote line platform.
“Let’s go.”
Moments later, they were standing on the busy platform.
“You want to get off in four stops. At Yurakucho station, the one right after Tokyo Station. It’s right next to your hotel. Remember, four stops. Yurakucho.”
“Yes, Mom,” Danny said, rolling his eyes.
“This is a loop line. If you miss your stop, you have to wait for it to circle Tokyo. It’s an hour per loop.”
“Wouldn’t it be faster to get on the opposite train?”
Surprised, He realized that Danny was reading the train signs that were all written in both Japanese and English. He had never noticed that the signs were all in English. When did they do that, he wondered.
As the train approached, Trash handed over the shopping bags. Danny took them and then smiled.
“Thanks, man. Good luck with Sakamoto. Drop me an email after you do. Let me know what the plan is. I should be up at one in the morning, thanks to this damned jetlag.”
Trash nodded as Danny stepped on the train.
Just before the doors closed trash heard the American yell, “If you don’t fix this, You’re fucked. Got it?”
As the train pulled away, Trash felt a giant weight fall off his shoulders. He hadn’t realized how stressful it had been to guide Danny around Akihabara. Nor had he anticipated how different he would be from the geeky game collector he knew as Lancelet. That final warning gave him chills.
For now, he needed a plan. If he could convince Sakamoto to go back to the original deal, he could double his commission. Maybe he could build this into a new business, one that could actually get him somewhere.
But he needed a backup in case Sakamoto wouldn’t budge. That was the most likely scenario considering how intransigent the man had been the last time they spoke.
Trash pulled out his phone and sent a quick text to Pazu.
「On my way to your place. Need to talk.」
He checked the time. It was still 3:30. He had just half an hour before the post office closed.
Pulling off his bag, he checked the pocket containing the bulging leather wallet. Holding it like a treasure in his hands, he quickly made for the train station exit.