Chapter Nine: Are You A Professional Moron Or Just A Gifted Amateur?

「I think the HDMI splitter is fried.」

Trash had already tried everything. Then he had pulled out all the connections and reset everything again. Camera three would just not come online.

The camera and cables all checked out, so that left only the splitter.

「Sorry, I got a cheap crapgadget one from that Chinese no-brand discount shop. I should have known it would die. I’ll replace it with something better.」

「Seriously, Trash. Man, don’t worry about it. We’ll take care of it later. I’m still not sure I’m ready to livestream. It’s a lot more pressure, and I’m doing fine with YouTube for now.」

For now, Trash reconnected everything. He would check at home to see if he had anything that might work temporarily until he could replace the switch.

「Anyway, thanks. I’m sure we’ll get it running soon. In the meantime, I need to think about how to livestream. It’s a lot more pressure, and you need to plan more, and there’s the marketing-」

「Stupid owner! I told you I’ll take care of the marketing」

Both Trash and Pazu cringed, then looked at each other. Saki was standing in the doorway with a scowl on her face.

Trash tried to identify her current appearance, but this one totally escaped him.

She was in all black today. Some kind of gothic look, with white powder makeup contrasting with her black lipstick and some weird eye shadow. There was also a black tear-like shape painted by her left eye.

Her hair was long and straight, but she did something to make it super glossy, and he could see each strand move separately whenever she moved. Her outfit was, if anything, understated, all things considered.

She had on dark, skin-tight jeans and a thick black belt with a giant silver buckle. On top, she only had a plain black tank top with spaghetti straps, then a black leather jacket over it. The most eye-catching part was a necklace with a large, silver cross pendant. Well, it looked like a cross at first, but the top part was a loop, making it look more like a stick figure of an angel or something like that. From the way it gleamed, Trash could tell that it was handmade. Either she had fashioned it herself, or she had one of her

‘people’ do it.

「What are you staring at, freeloader? Gross.」

「Saki, lay off Trash. He’s got some stuff going on now it seems.」 Pazu tried to intervene.

「What? Did they lose his order of perverted Samus Aran figures? Did the market fall out on Bayonetta boobie mousepads?」

Each blow struck Trash hard, if only because the accusations were not far off the mark, but he didn’t show any reaction. This kind of thing was normal and could hardly rise to the level of abuse after all he had been through.

「Saki! Really. That’s enough! Trash is trying to help me fix the setup.」

「Fix it? He’s the idiot who built this mess in the first place. It’s a crap setup, with crap parts. I told you that I know a guy who can build out a professional rig. The kind the top streamers use.」

「That costs a fortune. You know I can’t afford that. Besides, I’m just starting, so there’s no problem if I keep it simple for now.」

「You gotta go big from the start. If you don’t, no one will take you seriously. The freeloader is just throwing cheap parts together and praying it works, AND IT DOESN’T!」

「Enough! Saki! Hana-」

Her eyes bulged, then she spun around and disappeared out the door. It was a soft-close door, the type that gently closed by themselves that you sometimes see in restaurants, but somehow, Trash could hear it slam shut.

If there were anyone in the world who hated their real name more than Trash, Saki would take that position easily.

「Man, you really need to get a new waitress.」

「For reals.」

「You’re going to pay for that, you know?」 Trash said sympathetically.

「Yeah.」 Pazu agreed, a fatalistic expression on his face.

「Still sleeping with her.」

「Yup.」

「Fuckin normie.」

「Shut your mouth.」

They shared a grin, then Trash covered up the equipment box.

「She has a point, though. You really should get a pro to do this. Someone who can make your videos look more… professional.」

「What are you saying? I made the top 1,000 last month. I think I’m doing pretty well already.」

「Really? No way. That’s awesome! Congratulations! Why didn’t you say something?」

Pazu had been working hard on his channel. Trash knew it was getting more traction, but making the top one thousand vloggers in the country was a very big deal.

Trash was reminded of something one of his home-room teachers told his class back in high school.

「There are three ways to find your path in life.」

「The first is to do what other people tell you. That’s what nearly everyone does. It’s easy, and you don’t have to be responsible for the outcome. If you are unhappy later, you can always blame someone else. Your parents, your friends, or your homeroom teacher.」

「The second way is to find out what you love. Work your ass until you are good enough that people will pay you for it. They say if you do what you love, you’ll never work a day in your life.」

「The third is just the opposite. First, find out what you are good at. Work at it until you are the best, the best in the world. Then, charge a ton and make it rich. Retire to some island and die in a bed with a prostitute. I call that the ‘Duke Togo’ path.」

It was not that surprising that this teacher was fired later for dating one of his students. Still, that might have been the only lesson that stuck with Trash from his entire time at that school.

Pazu was on the second path. Not just on it, he was killing it. He searched for what he wanted to do. He was smart and good at lots of things, but when he found the path he wanted to pursue, he poured everything he had into it until there was no way he was not going to be a huge success.

Things were different for Trash. Nobody told him what to do. No one seemed to care as long as he did it away from them. He had no idea what he wanted to do. He didn’t even like what he did now, to tell the truth. Especially right at this moment.

If there was something that he was good at, it was a mystery. Maybe English, but he hated being around people. He couldn’t see a career built on language that didn’t force him to work with people.

「That’s amazing! How did you get there so fast? I thought you said it would take a while.」

「Well, you get a lot of the credit. Despite what Saki said, the videos we make now look great. The big thing was your idea, though.」

Trash tilted his head to the side.

You might be reading a stolen copy. Visit Royal Road for the authentic version.

「Huh?」

「English! You told me to add subtitles in English. Eighty percent of my views come from America alone. Then there is traffic from Europe and Southeast Asia.」

「Yeah, I thought you didn’t want to do that.」 Trash recalled the suggestion he had made. Pazu was certainly unenthusiastic at the time.

「Well, to be honest, I just didn’t want you to do it.」

「What do you mean? I can do it. My English is way better than yours, at least.」

「I know!」 Pazu stepped back defensively.「It’s just, you know. Embarrassing… to have you reading everything I say.」

Trash stared at Pazu for a moment. Then started to laugh.

「You’re an idiot.」

He pushed Trash away from the counter.

「Move over. Let me check the lighting. I bet you messed it up.」

「So, who is doing the translating? No way it’s her.」

「Hey! Watch your mouth, freeloader.」

How did she move around so quietly? He wanted to say something about putting a bell around her neck, but realized that would be cause for his instant death.

「Stop thinking rude things.」 Saki growled with a murderous look in her eyes.

「Oh, it’s a friend of Saki’s who is doing it. The translation. She’s a returnee. You met her, I think.」

「Huh?」

「At Comiket last summer. She’s a cosplayer.」

「Actually, you met her more recently, you pig!」

「Huh?」 Trash was completely confused now.

Saki pulled out her phone and scrolled through some messages.

「Your boy here was playing down in Akiba, hitting up maid cafes with some hot foreigner.」

「Huh? You traitor! Why didn’t you bring her here?」

「Not her, him. Check it out.」

Saki passed the phone to Pazu, looked at the picture, then up at Trash.

「Hmmm. Okay. That’s new. Anything you want to talk about, man? I mean, we’re all adults here, right?」

Trash snatched the phone, and in the split second he held it before Saki grabbed it back, he saw the photo of himself, sitting with Danny, eating cake.

「What the hell? How did you get this?」

「Hey! Don’t worry. We won’t judge.」

「Screw that. I am your judge, jury, and executioner. Confess!」

Saki mimed checking the sharpness of a swordblade with her finger.

Trash reached out to take the phone back again.

「Where was that taken? How did you get that?」

Pazu grabbed it first.

「Seriously? I mean, I know things have been tight lately, but I didn’t think you would have to resort to… I told you I could lend you some money if you need it.」

「N-no! It’s not! I mean… d-dammit!」

「Satsuki sent me that pic. She said you were playing around with some American guy. Flashing around piles of cash.」

「Huh? What are you up to? I was just kidding. Are you really doing something… weird?」 Pazu looked actually concerned.

「N-no! Who’s Satsuki? How did you get that picture」

「She’s the translator. For the videos. Saki’s friend. I told you, we saw her at Summer Comiket. She was the one dressed as Saber. You remember? The one with the big-」

Saki smacked Pazu on the arm Hard.

「Ow! …sword! Big sword!」

Trash tried to recall the event. On the second day, Pazu wanted to meet up with Saki in the cosplayer section. She was there with a group of other cosplayers, and there was a girl dressed as Saber. He couldn’t really remember her much.

Then it clicked. That maid. The one at Cure. The one who spoke English. She was a returnee… and a friend of Saki’s and must have recognized him from Comiket… Crap.

Defeated, Trash looked at the ground.

「Fine!」

「What? It’s true?」

「No! I mean, Fine, I’ll tell you. I was going to tell you anyway. But now the story is all…」

「Just start from the beginning. Saki, can you make tea?」

「Screw that, make your own tea.」 she retorted, then walked through the door back into the dining room.

「She really is the worst waitress.」

「Yes, yes, she is.」 Pazu agreed, admiring her jeans as she left the kitchen.

----------------------------------------

「When did you even get involved in this kind of crap?」 Pazu looked stern.

Trash had just explained the deal, and what was going on, but as he said it out loud, he realized how stupid he had been.

「It just kinda happened. I don’t know. It’s the first time anything like this came up.」

「Messing around with Hansa? Are you nuts? Those big corpos are nasty. They do not mess around. Why would you even think this is a good idea? If they catch you.」

He had never actually seen Pazu this upset. Trash knew that part of it was that he had kept it a secret. He knew Pazu might feel betrayed, but this reaction was stronger than he was expecting.

「I never thought it was a good idea. I just… I didn’t have a choice. I needed the money, and I don’t have time.」

「What do you mean? Just ask me. I told you. What do you mean you don’t have the time? Do you owe someone money?」

「Not much… I mean, that’s not the problem.」

「Yup, that’s what all those old guys parked on the benches over by JRA say.」 Saki threw in from her perch at the counter bar.

「I’m not gambling. Or drinking, or any of that kind of stuff. Yeah, I owe Takei for some figures he spotted me from the limited release… But it’s not much, and he said I can pay it off anytime.」

「Gross. Bet they are perverted figures. Creep!」

「Look who’s talking.」

Trash regretted the words as soon as they escaped his lips. No, even before then. He could feel them coming up his throat and tried desperately to prevent them from reaching the air where they would spread and cause his inevitable doom, but he was too late, slapping his hand over his mouth a fraction of a second after his fate was set.

「Fucker! What did you say!?」

「All right. Everyone, take it easy.」 Pazu rose from the table and stood between Saki and Trash, trying to calm everyone down.

「If that’s it. Then that should be fine. What are you in for with Takei?」

「About 30,000.」

「Seriously? That’s nothing then. Why on earth would you try something this risky?」

Trash stared down into his teacup.

「Because that’s not all, is it, freeloader?」 Saki predicted.

Trash close his eyes. This was it. His humiliation. He had lost everything. Telling his only friend made it real. It was now an indisputable fact.

「I’m getting kicked out. I’m losing the factory.」

「Huh?」

「End of the month. I have to get out.」

「What?! Your uncle?」

「And my aunt. Both of them. I’m totally screwed.」

「Why?」

「You know why, I mean, I know they hate me. What other reason do they need?」 Trash kept staring into the cup. It was a nice one. An expensive-looking one you get to use in trendy cafes. Well, that made sense after all.

「Those fuckers!」 Pazu slammed his fist on the table.

「Can’t you delay it? Why now?」

Trash shook his head. There was no point in hiding it anymore.

「It’s too late. They have been pushing me since the beginning of the year. I just kept… I don’t know, trying to wish it away.」

「Since you became a legal adult. What a bunch of unimaginative bastards. What about your grandfather’s will? Didn’t he leave you anything?」

「No. Nothing. You know. There’s no way he would.」

「That’s not right. It can’t be legal. I’ll ask my dad. Maybe we can get a lawyer.」

「Forget it. I fucked up. I just hid my head and tried to pretend it away.」

Now that his secret was out, he felt an amazing calm. Maybe this was how it was supposed to end. He had pushed it up to the wire. Then his time ran out. The wire snapped.

Game Over.

「Hey, Freeloader. Why did you come here?」

Trash looked up. Saki looked different from her usual self. She wasn’t asking him in an accusing manner. She actually appeared to be curious.

Pazu turned and scowled at her though.

「Saki, can’t you be a tiny bit compassionate?」

「No, I get it. I did come here with a reason. I wanted to ask for your help.」

「Yeah, sure, whatever you need. You can stay at my place while we-」

「Screw that. He stays at your place, I’ll sleep somewhere else. I’m not sleeping next to some creepy geek… well, not a different one, at least. He can sleep at a netcafe.」

The new calm that had come to his mind, changed how he heard her words. Somehow, he could tell there was no malice behind it. It was almost like she was trying to help.

「She’s right. I need to… I want to solve this myself… If I can. But it’s true. I wanted to ask for a favor.」

Pazu seemed confused. A moment ago, he expected the two people here to pull out knives, but the mood seemed completely different. He knew that if Saki didn’t care about what happened to Trash, she wouldn’t still be here in the room at all. Her presence here meant that she was invested. Maybe she just wanted to protect him, but she seemed almost curious. He sat down and let Trash continue.

「There might be a way to save the deal. Sakamoto is being a total dick about the money. I can’t think of any normal way that Danny can get that much cash, that quickly.」

「Don’t look at me. No way I can’t get that amount of cash right now. Maybe in a year or two, if my income from the channel keeps going up.」

「No, I’d never ask you for money. I told you that years ago, and I’ve never gone back on it. I’d rather die on the street.」

「Doesn’t stop you from eating his food, though.」

Pazu turned again and shushed her.

「It’s not like Danny doesn’t have the money. He has plenty. He’s a millionaire. Sold his dot com for tons and is now a big venture capitalist or whatever. He has the money in Singapore. I just need to find someone willing to make a swap or something like that. Someone who has cash, and might be happy to get a bank account in Singapore.」

Trash stalled. Maybe it was a stupid idea. He was making a lot of strange assumptions now, and he knew it.

「I’m not sure what you are talking about. Sounds pretty sketchy, probably illegal. Who would want to get involved in something like that?」

「What about the ‘old goat’?」

「Huh?」

「You remember? The old man. You said he called himself the ‘old goat’?」

「Him? Takeshita Street? Are you serious?」

Trash nodded.

Pazu bit his thumb. An old nervous tick.

「Who’s that?」 Saki hopped off the counter stool and sat next to Pazu.

「I mean… I suppose it’s not impossible. But…」

「You said the old man liked you. I mean, it might not hurt just to ask… It’s not like it’s really that illegal; more like ethically questionable. If he says no, then I give up. Okay? I’ll scrap the deal and try something else.」

「Who are you talking about?」 Saki demanded and pulled on Pazu’s sleeve.

「The ‘Old Goat’ of Takeshita Street… I don’t know. That’s a very heavy gate to open, and once you do…」

「I know. It’s… it’s just the only thing I could think of.」

「I’m going to make one last attempt to convince Sakamoto. But if it doesn’t work, and I’m not optimistic. I tried for hours last night. If he won’t change his mind, do you think you can introduce me? That’s all. Just an introduction. I’m serious. I don’t want you pulled into this any more than that.」

「Who are you talking about? Tell me!」 Saki was pulling and pushing Pazu back and forth like a metronome.

Finally, he shrugged her off his arm.

「He’s an old boss of mine. Sort of. I just worked for him for a couple of weeks.」

「Who is he? Some scary guy or something」

Pazu turned to look her in the eyes.

「Honestly, I don’t know.」 Pazu explained.「I didn’t work there long, as I said. But Trash and I, we used to call him ‘The Harajuku Godfather’.」

Saki burst out laughing. Then she noticed that neither Pazu nor Trash were laughing.

「Seriously?」