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59. Goblin Lair (oom)

Chapter 59. Goblin Lair

The first problem we encountered on Floor 2 was one of currency. Neither our shop nor our Floor 1 guild transferred onto the next floor. That wasn’t completely the end of the world or anything, but it prevented us from pooling all of our points from the get-go. The 5 000 point price wasn’t worth it, either, for a single mad dash across the floor. True, we would need to form a guild eventually if we wanted to set up more permanently, but there wasn’t any point in wasting currency in the current situation.

We charged through goblin spearmen, decimating them with ease. Slimey crashed into waves upon waves of enemies, rolling over them and ignoring the many stabs from hundreds of spears, putting his increased physical defenses to the test. Thwain took to the skies, performing his usual distractionary tactics and causing more and more infighting within goblin ranks. Pyro, meanwhile, manipulated the earth underneath our feet, sending a long platform of dirt hurtling forwards, displacing any trees in our way. It was a surreal experience, and quite disorienting for the first minute or so. We were running on a moving slab that continuously stretched out in front of us and crumbled apart behind us. As a result, we were able to double down on our speed, hurtling across the floor faster than ever.

We moved so fast that Slimey barely had time to digest any of the goblin corpses. Instead, he started using suspended goblin bodies as makeshift shields to block attacks and to regain lost mass. All too soon, we came upon goblin swordsmen, who could effortlessly cleave through both Slimey and his goblin meat shields. Still, Pyro kept us shooting forward. I frowned as goblin swordsmen gave up on attacking us head on and instead resorted to simply sticking their swords out towards us and letting our momentum rip their swords through Slimey’s sides.

“Enchanted plates!” I yelled to my summon. Instantly, ten sheets of ultra-enhanced metal appeared within Slimey’s body, moving towards his sides. The metal screeched as swords scraped them, but they held up against the attacks. They had held their own throughout most of the raid on the church, and had been forged, enchanted and enhanced by the best of our craftsmen, after all. With a little time to breathe, I quickly paid the 100 points to gain access to the shop, confirming that prices looked generally the same.

I tumbled to the ground, ripped out of my perusal, as our platform took a hard left turn. Slorp followed suit, hitting the ground hard with their shoulder. I struggled to catch my breath and had to force myself not to panic. After a moment, air crept back into my lungs and I slowly relaxed.

“Hey, what gives?” I asked Pyro while stumbling back to my feet and running to catch up.

“Thwain signaled danger ahead. Prob one of them shaman shits you was talkin’ ‘bout. Goin’ the long way ‘round to not need to deal with ‘em.”

I nodded, though Pyro didn’t see. He was laser focused and directing all of his attention on keeping us moving while he, himself, was also running. The mad dash lasted only a few more minutes before I had reached enough points for the next part of the plan. It was just in time, too. Slorp was gasping for breath and Pyro was starting to sweat. Slimey, too, wasn’t doing too hot, despite his enhanced plates holding up marvelously. I signaled Pyro and waited for his orders.

“Now!” Pyro yelled, and our mobile dirt platform screeched to a halt. We all took a few more running steps before our momentum vented out, then I opened my Festival shop. I ignored the feeling of the ground rising beneath me as I selected the newly-available option that I had been saving up for: safe zone. I quickly placed the zone beneath us, unable to widen the zone due to lack of funds, and accepted the prompt. It was as if we had turned quasi-invisible. The sea of goblins parted around us, for the most part, instead of converging on us. Goblin spearmen and swordsmen alike flew past us, weapons raised to fight whatever adversary awaited them in the dark forest.

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They didn’t all leave us alone, however. Some goblins were pushed into Slimey by their brethren, prompting them to flail about and swing at my slime. Others seemed to ignore the safe zone, pushing and slashing their way through the crowd to get to us, though they were few and far between. Slorp waited until the aggroed goblins got within Slimey’s range and pierced their heads with a water bolt through the use of their water manipulation. I flinched a bit every time. Even bullets didn’t leave holes that clean through skulls. Their control over water droplets was truly terrifying. To make water harder than iron and to move so fast that goblins died without even seeing it coming… I shuddered as I realized that Slorp could probably take us all out and make it across the floor, and there probably wasn’t anything any of us could do about it.

Pyro raised thick walls of stone around us in case the goblins got frisky, then created surprisingly soft depressions in the ground for us to sleep in. Slimey slowly digested the overwhelming mass of accumulated bodies he had picked up on the way while the rest of us rested. Thwain even came back, napping with his back to one of the walls and closing his eyes for a bit. He looked a little rough, with cuts and dried blood all across his body, but he didn’t seem to have any major wounds. His agility and ability to self heal were clearly enough to keep him alive, though not unharmed.

After dozing for a bit, I browsed the Festival shop, finding it almost identical to the previous floor’s options, like I had previously noted. I glanced up at my points: 382FP and slowly rising as stray goblins were disposed of by Slimey. Feeling secure in knowing that a minimum of two other team members would be purchasing safe zones before it was my turn again, if we hadn’t already crossed the floor yet, I selected Mundane armor - good quality, purchasing it for 300FP.

A pair of metal bracers coalesced in front of me. They were sturdier than the other good quality armor pieces that had been bought on Floor 1, but they weren’t anything special. A quick test ended with the bracers disintegrating within Slimey’s goop. With only 82 FP remaining, I did the only natural thing to do: I spent 50FP on good quality food and savored the tangy yellow custard until Pyro struck up a conversation with Slorp.

“Hey, Tentacles. If you can get super scuba class powers from our Tower, can we get whooshy elemental shit from yours?” Pyro asked, wiggling his fingers in the air.

Slorp teetered their head from side to side a bit before answering. “Poshibly. Elemental Coaleshensh getsh dangeroush after your fifteenth birthday. Or what you might call name day or the shelebration of another Shummer older. Fatality ratesh shpike harshly after fifteen.”

“How bad are our odds?”

“Shomewhere around fifty pershent.”

“Hm,” Pyro grunted. “I’d almost take that bet.”

Slorp’s eyes widened. “You have an abundansh of monshters to grind in your Tower. Many in my clan would kill for shuch an opportunity. Plush, your Tower ish far fairer than the catfolk Tower. Far fewer shcams.”

Pyro shook his head. “We only got to climb this far because of the Festival an’ all this bullshit. It’s kinda been hell gettin’ to this point. An’ we’re riskin’ it quite a bit by goin’ across that portal. Without a safe zone, even a temp one like this, we might jus’ walk into some boar tusks and die on the spot. And plus, with -- Wait, catfolk?”

“Hmm?’

“Like, honest to goodness chicks that have tails an’ furry ears and shit?”

“Yesh…”

“Alright boys, enough dilly dallyin’!” Pyro yelled, slapping his knees with both hands and springing up to his feet. “Get the fuck up and get the fuck out, we bouncin’, now!”