Adapted from a transmission by Captain StonerSteve
[Beginning of transmission]
Hello! If you’re just stumbling across this data log, you might be confused. Allow me to explain, my name is StonerSteve, and I’ve been traversing the timelines in my trusty starship with a few crew mates on board. I’m recording our adventures in my captain’s log using a smartwatch — a rather rudimentary piece of technology according to the standards of some realities I have visited. I continue to use it, however, because it reminds me of home and keeps me grounded.
Cartoon of a wizard with white beard floating in a large bubble. [https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fit:4800/format:webp/1*z_OHsSbt2yM82f6sJQRc3Q.jpeg]
Today, I am traversing the surface of Conneticus Branchicus 34, which bears a striking resemblance to your homeworld of Earth. Some key differences could prove deadly to me, so I will remain in this AtmosBubble. It is a 360-degree protective shield that makes me invisible by creating a reflective surface on the outside. Sealed up inside, I can move about freely, and the shield conforms to my movements.
I need to be conscious of the energy drain. The force bubble is directly connected to my SolCharge, a crystalline vial embedded in my chest. It was installed for me during one of my travels some years ago by the gem-based culture of Glintara on the planet of Lumicryst. I still do not quite understand how it works. The crystal of the vial can harness and store energy. I usually just charge with the sun because it’s so quick. A full moon or a bright moon works, as well, although it takes a bit longer.
I don’t know if everybody’s SolCharge looks the same. The liquid in mine is a sort of amber color. The consistency is viscous, almost like honey. As I use the energy, the liquid depletes, and I can see the level reduced in the vial.
I was taught a meditation practice to receive the charge directly from the Universe. It comes down in the form of a sparking sphere of energy which turns into an amber liquid when it reaches the crystal vial.
[Transmission interrupted]
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[Transmission resumes]
Sorry, about that. Sometimes I get interference on this contraption. It interacts weirdly with local radio waves. Actually, is it radio waves? Now that I think about it, how do they broadcast in this dimension?
I’ve sent out a few audio broadcasts before this, but I’m not sure if any made it through the dilation inhibitors. This time, I’m sending a transcript of my captain’s log along with the audio. With any luck, a younger version of myself will be able to post this on the World Wide Web.
Maybe we should take a walk while I talk. It has started raining, and the water does appear to be acid here. Thankfully, the protective bubble accommodates that, and I am feeling quite cozy on this trek.
There is a vicious barking in the distance. This planet is primarily inhabited by a species of sentient fungi, the members of which are known for their propensity for long naps. Hopefully, whatever alien is making such an aggressive noise, has a bark that is worse than their bite.
It will be some time before I reach my destination, so if you don’t mind, I would like to continue my diatribe on time. The way I was taught, time is based on perspective. How one understands time is how one can travel through time. For example, I understand time as a flat disk. Like a dinner plate full of food at the beginning of a meal. Cheese triangles, potato fingers, elixir of dill — all of the food is on the plate together, regardless of what order it is consumed. Everything that has ever existed, including every action, is on the plate at the same time. It all exists at once. That means every moment I have been alive exists now and forever. It existed then, it exists now, and it will exist tomorrow.
You could be reading stolen content. Head to the original site for the genuine story.
It is possible to travel in time to any of those moments on the plate. One way to accomplish this is to take on the perspective of myself at the moment I want to visit. There’s Steve the younger, Steve the Elder (which is my perspective now as I talk to you), and Steve the Ancient is somewhere in the future. The concepts of future and past are also subject to perspective. I just use the word “future” to refer to anything that will happen after the current moment I am existing in. Similarly, “past” refers to anything that happened before this moment. Although time exists all at once, it is experienced linearly, at least by many species in the multiverse.
There is a funny thing about time’s tendency to splinter. For each decision that you or I make, a thousand versions of existence branch out in different timelines. Think of all the countless decisions you make daily. They may not all seem like a big deal, but all of those decisions add up to the timeline you are experiencing right now. What’s incredible is the way everyone’s timelines intersect, weaving together the meal on the dinner plate of time.
Would you like to visit other versions of yourself in those other timelines? Well, who wouldn’t? Thinking about the decisions we could have made differently will drive a person to the realm of sorrow. However, the desire to see what our lifetime “could have been” is irresistible. It’s a bit tricky, but visiting your variants can be done using something called chronomancy. There are as many disciplines of practicing chronomancy as there are species in the multiverse, and some of these practices are quite intricate.
As a young wizard, I was taught the binary code of existence. At some point as an adult, I was introduced to the sacred herb which boosts my time hopping abilities. My hybrid discipline is something like a magic spell and a technological code rolled into a delicious burrito. That is my last food reference for this broadcast. All this philosophy has made me hungry.
So, why did we come to this timeline? That is a great question, as good as any. I can tell you’ve been traveling as long as I have.
One does kind of need a reason to visit another time, otherwise, what’s the point? The answer is in the question. The point of existence is to make decisions and experience things. For some, I think, not knowing about the multiverse is their comfort. I like to know, however. I want to know the possibilities. I want to see the options.
I want to know.
[Transmission interrupted]
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[Transmission resumes]
The weather has gotten a bit treacherous. The acid rain is falling faster now and hotter. It has become more difficult for the AtmosBubble to deflect, which is a drain on the SolCharge. But, we persevere!
There’s a sheltered strip ahead. It should be a bit easier going soon. This stretch of trees reminds me of neighborhood streets in my youth.
Memories are important. They help to keep us grounded while we’re exploring the outer realms of the imagination. They tether us so we don’t go beyond the possibilities of reality in the quest to experience a different time in a different place.
It occurs to me, I have neglected to provide you with the mission briefing. Here I am mumbling away to myself, forgetting the quest at hand. I am on Conneticus Branchicus 34 in search of the treasure some call the Legend Beyond Imagining.
This treasure is rumored to be beyond description, but I’m stubborn enough to try. It was described in the Galactic Treasure Hunter’s Guide, Second Editionas a solid gold bone. According to legend, it once belonged to the philosopher king Horace Barknst.
One of his ancestors still sits on the throne of Crun-chel. It was from this royal court I received a request to locate the Legend Beyond Imagining. This artifact was stolen some years before. During my investigation I crossed two time streams, visited three star systems, and traversed a black hole tracking the various owners who had possessed the gold bone. It now seems to be in the paws of …
[Transmission interrupted]
The following is a transcription of the conversation between the captain and his chief engineer.
Captain StonerSteve: “Yes, what can I do you for?”
Muffled reply.
Steve: “Hey there, Lugsy!”
Indistinct answer.
Steve: “Okay, perfect!”
Faint response.
Steve: “Thank you, I’ll be right there.”
[End of recording]
Sorry about that interruption. It was my chief engineer Lugsy the Penguin. You may know his sister Hugsy. She was an actress in the twentieth century AD your time (according to the Gregorian Mandate calendar). The two are more different than a pair of snowflakes. Lugsy loves conversation whereas Hugsy is known for playing strong silent types.
Friends aside, I know nothing about engineering. Which is why I leave it to the experts. And one of those experts just informed me that a big section of our starship has sustained damage. Unfortunately, the captain’s log must end early so I can help with repairs.
The Quest for the Golden Bone will continue in the future.
[End of transmission]
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Thank you for reading this story! I am building a sci-fi/fantasy universe with humorous adventures and cozy vibes. Comments are appreciated!
🪄 FIND more adventures at linktr.ee/StonerSteve