18. The People Who're a Bit Unsure About Me

The Kraken, much like the Dragon, doesn’t disappear after its death. Neither does it go back to being a BBG. Instead, it just takes up a lot of real estate with its bulky humidifier trunk and now lifeless tentacles.

Does this thing count as a ‘Novellen’, then, according to the Malik-Issen’s system of categorizing monsters and other strange phenomena?

I look to Feverfew and ask as much. He hears the word, understands what I’m asking, then… shakes his head. No elaboration.

I can’t tell if it’s a “no” shake of the head or an “I don’t know” shake of the head. And I have no way to ask for clarification. I shrug and decide to put a pin on this mystery too. I’m starting to run out of pins, while there seems to be an endless supply of mysteries.

Now that the boss is dealt with, it’s time to figure out the next steps. Going back to the start of the corridor isn’t really an option, because these Portal Realms seem to work on a one-way traffic. That hopefully means an ‘exit’ can be found right inside this boss arena.

Sure enough, we soon find a second (third for me, actually) Portal, one that sits on the far side of the arena from where we entered. And upon this discovery, we once again exchange a look, because we’re cautious boys, and this Portal definitely wasn’t here before we fought the Kraken.

A BBG that waits for the challengers to show up before it differentiates itself. A Portal that materializes after said BBG is defeated. This is really starting to have the fingerprints of ‘higher intelligence’ all over it, but at the same time, there’s not a whole lot of clues to go on. Speaking of clues…

I signal for Feverfew to give me a second as I run back to the Kraken. My thinking is that I could bring a piece of the alien robot scrap back with me to Altikor, where I’m sure someone a lot smarter than me could learn something from it. A segment from one of the chopped-up tentacles should do.

I think it’s a good idea, but when Feverfew sees what I’m doing, he shakes his head again. This time, I know it’s a “no” shake of the head, but I can’t tell if it’s a “don’t” no or a “can’t” no.

It doesn’t take long for me to find out, though. As I walk into the Portal as I normally would, except with a robot tentacle in hand, I bounce painfully against the screen, like in one of those home videos where some dumbass runs head-first into a clear screen door.

In this case, the dumbass is me. I also learn that Feverfew’s shake of the head was a “can’t” no.

So, let me get this straight. The Portal Realm won’t let me carry any of its components back to the ‘real world’. And the fact that Feverfew knew this means he or at least some other Portallen have had prior experience with this ‘glitch’. Which also means I’m not the only variable that can cause this glitch, but it’s also rare enough for someone like Feverfew to act all alarmed and suspicious and—

I stop my clueless mystery-solving before my head explodes. Things are getting curiouser and curiouser, but I feel like I’m further than ever from actual answers.

After I give up on the tentacle bits, the Portal lets me through normally. There’s no multiple choice this time, and I also don’t get that ‘funny feeling’ I had before the previous one.

Which is why I’m not too surprised when this latest bit of teleportation spits me out inside a dimly lit room of brick construction. The ‘real world’—presumably our originally intended destination before my party and I set off on our quest. And sure enough…

I’m not alone in the room, and that’s before Feverfew catches up to me. Belpha the Tiefling Knight is here, leaning against a wall and facing the Portal screen—clearly waiting for our arrival.

And as soon as she sees me, she widens her eyes, flares her nostrils, and dives toward me.

Before I know it, I’m on the ground, having suffered the hardest football tackle known to man. From a large, horned, demi-fiend woman in shining armor, no less. And yeah, it hurts about as much as you’d imagine.

In fact, I’m in so much pain that I barely have the bandwidth to perceive the ensuing commotion. Oh, and it doesn’t help that I can barely breathe with a Tiefling Knight’s full weight pressing down on me.

Belpha yells at me in this sonorous and dignified contralto that would honestly be a treat to listen to in any other situation (she could be an NFL linebacker or a Broadway actress if this Portallen thing doesn’t work out). Feverfew’s slightly agitated voice joins the fray, presumably to talk Belpha down, but it’s easily drowned out by all the other noise. The ‘other noise’ includes footsteps rushing down a staircase, followed by—

“Protasi!”

A familiar voice. Belonging to the very first person I met in this increasingly hostile world.

At Leto Iriden’s incantation, [Barrier] springs up around me, which is sturdy enough to push off even an NFL linebacker. I can finally breathe again, which doesn’t help with the pain one bit, but it does help with the whole staying alive thing. It also helps me free up some bandwidth with which to process what the fuck is going on.

I groan pitifully and check myself all over for injuries (nothing new, as far as I can tell; as painful a tackle as hers was, Belpha even has the technique of a seasoned pro). Meanwhile, Mom and Dad—I mean, Leto and Belpha—are going at each other with raised voices and frantic gestures. Cat Bro has shrunk into a corner, watching the whole shitshow with narrowed eyes.

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I’m still useless with Malik-Ennar at the best of times, and that goes double during a shouting match. I don’t understand a single word that passes between my Knight and Mage party-mates, but the argument itself is surprisingly brief.

By the time I manage to sit up on my own, it appears that my fate has been decided. Belpha grabs me by the armpit and lifts me to my feet. I’d say her manners are firm, but not necessarily rough. She then turns me around and cuffs me.

It goes without saying that this the first time I’ve ever been handcuffed—with magical handcuffs, no less, ones that materialized at an incantation spoken by Belpha. The Tiefling spins me back around, which is how I finally come face to face with Leto—the person I most needed to see.

But the look on her face almost makes me regret seeing her. She looks to be on the verge of tears, like she’s trying to hold it together at a loved one’s funeral.

No. Please. Don’t look like that on my account. Surely, it can’t be that bad? This can’t be how my Isekai adventure ends—roughed up and arrested by my own party member?

But as Belpha leads me by the armpit and out of the Portal room, she says something in a low voice that’s clearly meant for my ears. I don’t catch or understand most of it, except for three familiar words:

“Reliken Nadira Apados.”

***

As I rot away in a dingy jail cell in a town called ‘Rugok’, I manage to pick up a few clues here and there. I do so thanks in large part to Leto, who tries her best to keep me company even as she’s busy dealing with the fallout of the latest Portal fuckery.

Maybe the most interesting thing I learn is that several days had already passed by the time Feverfew and I made it out of the Portal Realm. In that time, Leto and Belpha had already gone and finished the original quest on their own, then proceeded to wait for us—mainly me, the Person of Interest—to pop out of the Portal.

This means that the ‘glitch’ operates on a separate timeline from the outside world. Maybe my ‘hyperbolic time chamber’ analogy wasn’t far off.

It also means that Feverfew got sucked into the same glitch while the other two passed through unaffected. And I can’t shake the feeling that I somehow had a hand in it.

Remember that fork in the first corridor? Piano teacher on one side and family cat on the other? This might sound crazy, but I’m almost certain: if I’d chosen the ‘piano teacher route’ back then, it would’ve been Belpha waiting for me on the other side of the Portal.

Curiouser and curiouser. Which still leaves the question: where’s Leto in all this? Why didn’t I have a third choice that would’ve led me to her?

And what might’ve been the ‘feeling’ I’d get from Leto Iriden’s Portal?

A familiar chill runs through me as I ponder the answerless question. Because… it’s not quite answerless, is it? Somehow, I can picture it. The image that would’ve marked a glitched Portal as belonging to Elf Girl.

The image of a gun in my face.

After a few days of this pointless pondering, even Leto leaves my side. From what I can gather, there’s urgent business she has to attend to back in Altikor.

I’m disappointed, but I’m not surprised. I mean, she’s the Malika, after all. I’m sure she’s got a lot on her plate.

Right before she leaves, she gets that same look on her face. The one like she’s at my funeral. I’m already feeling like shit, and this makes me feel even worse.

Despite my low mood, I manage to put on something that might resemble a carefree smile. In response, Leto manages to smile back, if only weakly. I’ll take it. I just don’t want that funeral face to be my lasting image of Leto Iriden in case, you know…

In the end, I’m left all alone in my jail cell.

Leto’s gone. Feverfew’s gone. The only party member that remains in Rugok is Belpha, who’s apparently on duty to keep an eye on me while the powers that be decide what to do with me.

I can understand the delay and the need to keep me here, even though our business in Rugok is finished. No way they’d be comfortable letting me try a Portal again anytime soon. Heck, even I won’t complain if I never have to get near one of those things ever again.

I’d prefer not to rot in jail for the rest of my life though. It’s as lonely, boring, and maddening an experience as you’d expect, and for me, it’s made especially harrowing by the absense of the STSG.

Yes. They’ve confiscated my weapon. Of course they have, and I don’t blame them for it. But that STSG was the only thing that made me feel like I’m someone in this strange, strange world, and without it, I’m getting separation anxiety coupled with impostor syndrome like crazy.

As pretentious and unearned as this may sound, I just want my agency back, you know? If this should be the way my life ends, I’d want at least to have my sword in my hand. A way for me to fight back. A way for me to at least try and defy fate.

So, as I fall into an uneasy sleep on my third night in prison, I hold in my heart a fevered wish. Isekai gods? If you’re out there listening, will you please let me have my sword back?

Well, you know what they say. Be careful what you wish for.