“What happened?” Ginzari asked.

Somewhere in the mess of the dead body, we had been able to find Wellath’s heart. Hess had taken it and brought it back with her. Now, it was sitting on top of the table in Ginzari’s tent, covered with a cloth. On one side was the mercenary leader, and on the other side were us, the three people who had come back.

Nobody spoke up for a long time. Ginzari asked the question once more, with a bit more aggression in his voice.

“Both of you, leave.” Hess did not even look at us.

I stood there for a second, but without any hesitation, Typhen turned around and walked out of the tent. After taking a quick look at Hess and Ginzari, I also followed him out.

When I got out, Typhen had already vanished. I did not wish to talk to him right now, so I sat down right there, a little bit away from the tent. At that distance, I could not hear the conversation inside, but was still close enough to the tent to be able to go in immediately if called. Although I doubted that would ever happen.

It was slowly becoming difficult to remember what exactly the corpse had looked like. The only image that came to mind was a broken, blurry mess. I was forgetting it already, after not having given a single look of sadness throughout the entire trip. Hess and Typhen hadn’t looked at me much on the way back, but whenever they did, all I maintained was an expressionless face. Sometimes the focus on it was so high that it almost made me laugh. But my conscience stopped me for once. There was no way I could do something like that.

And yet, perhaps it would be a bit more acceptable if I did.

Wellath was dead.

I knew it was going to happen, but I still hadn’t tried to stop him from doing whatever he wanted. Firstly, I hadn’t even tried to stop him properly. Just a small, inaudible ‘no’ was never going to cut it. Secondly, I had started to think that he would never die to the flowerling, based on how well he had been fighting against it. Singlehandedly, he had allowed us to defeat the monster. I had started to consider that it could be something else that killed him.

But now he was gone, and there was nothing I could do about it. The two who had been with me were probably already suspicious of my behavior, and their stories would soon spread. Maybe Ginzari could help me out, since he knew of my situation. That was the one hope that I could hold on to right now.

After some time, the flaps of the tent opened and Hess stepped out.

She looked at me for a few seconds before walking away. I stayed on the ground, thinking of what I could do next.

“Get in here, Ryworn.” Ginzari’s voice boomed from the tent.

I shot up to my feet and walked over to the tent’s entrance. He gestured for me to come inside, so I did. Then, he asked me to close the flaps, which I also did.

“Did you know?” He asked.

“What?”

“Did you know that Wellath was going to die today?”

“Y…yes.”

“Then you tell us!” He shouted, and banged his hand on the table, “We wouldn’t have sent him to the hunt. All you needed to do was tell Hess or me that what was going to happen!”

“I-” My voice trailed off. I couldn’t bring myself to justify my actions.

“Finish the sentence.”

I gulped, “I…thought that telling him might lead to his death indirectly. I thought it could be one of those types, so I decided not to.”

“So, you decided not to tell him because then it would be your fault that he died?” Ginzari roared, “Who cares if he gets a chance to live or not? All that matters to you is that your hands should stay clean, yes?”

“I’m sorry.”

“Stop apologizing about everything!” He shouted, “If something like this happens, then you tell us. Don’t think for a single second that you’re important to any of us. Especially more than someone as accomplished as Wellath! And you killed him.”

I kept quiet.

“You killed him, because you decided that you were smart enough to interpret those stage directions.” He said, “You tried not to put that blame on yourself, but guess what? You are still to blame.”

I waited for something to happen…but it didn’t.

He had just mentioned stage directions out of the unmonitored time, and nothing had happened to him. Was it because the context in which they were mentioned were leading to him being sadder? Was it fine to acknowledge the theatre if something like that was the case? It didn’t fall under the case of a fallacy, but it was still very interesting information nonetheless. I tried to think of situations where it could be used in the future.

“Get out of here before I end up saying something worse.” He said and looked down at the heart on his table.

Without a word, I left the tent. Once I did, I remembered why exactly I had been there.

It had taken a single line out of Ginzari’s mouth to shift my focus from the main matter right now. It was pathetic.

I started to walk back to my tent.

I felt like I needed to talk to someone. A few minutes ago, that someone would have been Ginzari, but he had made his position clear pretty quickly. I couldn’t blame him, though, since he had lost a pretty valuable member of his band. Judging by his question, Hess had probably been the one to alert him to a situation like this. She must have guessed that I knew of this already, and pointed it out to Ginzari. The only one who couldn’t understand the magnitude of what had happened seemed to be me.

The tale has been illicitly lifted; should you spot it on Amazon, report the violation.

Maybe someone like Kaisel or Sylvia would help. Well, I could factor Sylvia out, since she would probably be angry too. But Kaisel might still maintain his calm like always and hear me out. That could happen. But I didn’t want to do it. Something about talking to the teacher who taught me magic about the teacher who taught be sword fighting did not seem right. Especially considering the context of the situation.

Prince was the last remaining person that I knew in the camp. He might be the best bet that I could actually talk to without feeling bad, but even then, he probably didn’t want to hear about it. I was just some rookie that he had been stuck with serving for a day or two. In reality, he would probably forget me as just another mercenary in a year or two. We would lose all contact, especially since he was just an assistant cook.

“He had no expression?” I heard a voice nearby, and quickly ran behind a tent. The voice was Sylvia’s.

The one who replied to her was Typhen, “His face was blank. His eyes still seemed like they carried some sense of what was happening, but not the rest of him. He did not even cry or frown about it.”

“That’s…I hadn’t expected something like that out of him. I mean, Wellath taught him for so long, and he reacts like that?” Sylvia was annoyed.

“Yeah, but you can’t blame him.”

“What do you mean?” Sylvia asked, “He saw his teacher get killed right in front of him, and feels nothing about it. The only one to blame for such heartlessness is him.”

Typhen sighed, “But I heard from Master Hess, a few years ago. She said that sometimes people just lose sight of what is going on when under shock. Maybe he just wasn’t able to respond or react to anything because of that. Wellath’s body, it just looked, horrific.”

“Hey, it’s not like I don’t want to believe in it.” She said, “But it makes very little sense to me. I’ve never seen someone react like that to something so gruesome. Even in the hospital, he was like that, but he at least seemed a bit disturbed by the things going on. What was so different about Wellath?”

She wasn’t wrong. I ignored the two of them and continued to slowly make my way to my tent.

The difference between the two could have been myself. Recently, I hadn’t been thinking about the whole situation with me not reacting to people’s sadness at all. In fact, even after knowing the directions this morning, I had been way too focused on thinking about other things, like saving myself from the fallout of it. I had started to accept all of it as normal, as something that I would live with forever.

Even now, I didn’t feel like thinking about it. I didn’t feel like worrying about it too much. It would just make me feel worse. I gave a short laugh at the paradox of it all. I’d probably be taken to Ginzari once more if someone saw me like this, so I took quick steps and reached my tent.

I entered it and closed the flaps.

The tent was dark, but that made it better. I went and lied down on the bed, and laughed.

Nobody came to my tent to give me dinner that night.

I didn’t mind.

For a few minutes, the stage directions had been ringing in my head –

Step up after Wellath’s death

What was that even supposed to mean?

I hadn’t done anything after Wellath died. Would I die before the day ended, for not being able to ‘step up’ in any possible way? I did not feel like getting out of the tent, so I wasn’t going to be able to interact with anyone. There was no way I could assert myself as being right for my actions. Ginzari had been quick to send me away too. Nobody else would listen or understand.

Usually, the stage directions were pretty clear. They would give you the chance to carry them out sometime in the day, and you just had to do them. This was the first time that I had received such a puzzle in terms of directions. Or maybe something would happen right now, which would allow me to satisfy it.

Almost as soon as I thought that, someone shook my tent.

I went and opened it to see Hess standing in front of me.

“Hess.” I managed to whisper.

“Follow me.” She said, and started walking away.

I did as she asked.

Through the different tents, we passed through multiple different mercenaries. I caught a glimpse of Typhen and Sylvia sitting together and talking. They saw us too, but acted as if they didn’t. In fact, almost the entire camp was acting like I didn’t exist. Had I made such a bad mistake by doing what I did? In the end, all I had done was try to protect my own mindset. I had no idea that this is how it would turn out.

Hess led me to the training grounds, and right to the place where Wellath had taught me all these days.

A few people who were loitering around saw us and left the place.

She walked to the weapons rack that Wellath always used, and took out one of the swords. An extra one that the blacksmith had made for me to practice with. She threw it towards me, and I picked it up from the ground.

“I won’t kill you. But it’s a duel until it becomes obvious that I would be able to.” She said, and pulled out her own sword from her waist.

I didn’t even try to question it. This could totally lead to her killing me, couldn’t it? This must be a clever way to make me agree to a duel, and then reveal that a duel must always end in a death or something. Anyways, I nodded and got into fighting position.

It didn’t even take ten seconds.

I got into a defensive position and tried to move forward. That was my only mistake. Hess rushed forward and hit the palm of my hand with the flat side of her sword. A little part of the edge cut through the back of my hand and the sword dropped. She kicked me the stomach and threw me to the ground, before putting her blade right next to my neck.

“You’re embarrassing.” She put her sword back in the sheath and sat down beside me.

I pushed myself up, and looked at her.

“I thought I must have been stupid to underestimate you. That Wellath would never let someone weak get into a hunt like this, which is why I told him to stay with me during the fight. But he was wrong. You’re not even close to good, after all.” She said, “I guess he was just blinded by the fact that you were able to swing a sword, considering your original performance.”

I kept quiet now too. There was nothing to answer here.

“So, we can’t really blame you for not telling us anything. You’re stupid, and that’s what we should expect from you. Stand up, go back to your room, and go to sleep. Give us a few days and we will find someone else to train you. I am not going to do it.”

I stayed on the ground.

What she was trying to say was obvious. It had been their fault for thinking highly of me. I was never anything good anyways. In fact, they were right. I had always known that I would be no good at fighting. I had also known that I wasn’t even mentally strong like Sylvia. But instead of taking any help, I had decided that it would all be fine. Right now, I could talk my way out of it. I could somehow convince her that I had thought that this was the best option. But when I opened my mouth,

“I could have tried harder.” I whispered.

“What was that?” Hess was already on her feet again.

“If I had tried to be stronger, smarter, then it wouldn’t have happened.” I said, “But I was too caught up in other things.”

“Like how to hide your weakness?” She asked.

I nodded.

“Stand up, go back to your room and go to sleep.” She repeated herself, her voice vengeful, “And always remember what you did today. The next time something like this happens, and you still remain who you were, then I will kill you myself.”

She left me in the training grounds.

I stood up too. Since I got those directions, I had been thinking about how weak I was to go against them. About all the handicaps that I had. Not even once, did I consider actively combating it. Because I knew I wouldn’t be able to. But it didn’t work like that. I would never be able to do anything if I did not try. Who cared if I knew Wellath we'll enough or not? I could have tried to help him out anyways, and worried about the consequences later.

I went back to my tent, and went to sleep.