Wen Reian

An unknown number of years after The Long Night

Wen Reian's Dream

This dream was different from his others. Not only was Wen Reian unable to decide his own actions in the dream, but his mentor and friend; Jin Songcai, was nowhere to be seen...

Feeling a little like he was watching the scene before him happen from outside his body, the boy couldn't shake the swirling sense of dread in his gut, nor the strange coldness of his hands and feet as he watched himself take a seat on the edge of The Wishing Well.

For a while he stared down into it, vaguely recalling all the wishes he'd made here over the years; some alone and some with company. Never before had the well itself seemed so huge and gaping. Reian was quite sure that either it had grown, or he had shrunk.

Despite his useless attempts to redirect the dream, to take control, he ended up peering down into the blackness, the bottom of the well seeming to call out his name.

Like it was inevitable, like his own thoughts straying had caused it, Reian suddenly was tumbling head over heels, down and down and down, feeling the wind whip past him, the coldness in his extremities spiraling inward to nip and pierce at his heart.

He felt as if he fell for ages, and when he finally stopped, he tried to stand and look around, but it was as if he was in a dark room inside his mind. A secret, locked place where he had never ventured before.

The boy knew that it was useless to wish to be somewhere else. He could barely find the strength now to urge his voice to call Songcai, or Yi-jun's names...

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This dream had a mind of its own, and when he tried to speak all that came out was water. Dripping down his chin, his throat. It spilled and spilled and didn't choke him, but definitely didn't feel good either-

Reian wished there was some light down here, any light, but the well was too deep, or the room was too dark, and there was nothing he could do about either of those things except wrap his arms around himself and try to keep warm.

As he felt the freezing cold water still dribbling from his parted lips, the boy felt himself go to wipe it away. Reian brushed the back of his hand across his chin and then a shiver began at the base of his neck-

Despite feeling and tasting like water, when Reian held his hand up he realised with horror that the liquid was in fact blood.

It's blood that's coming out of me! Pouring, deep into the well where all my unanswered wishes lay dead-

Reian was a stone. Tossed into the empty pit. No voice, no light, no life. And he knew somewhere in the back of his mind, that this pointless emptiness was his heart missing Xie Yi-jun. And Jin Songcai...

How could they just disappear? Even in my dreams, they're just gone now?

Multiplying in his head like so many evil thoughts was the same idea, growing in volume until he pressed his hands to his ears, rocking back and forth in agony and despair.

You made this happen! You made them leave! Unworthy, unlovable, untrue! Evil, evil, evil! Wen Reian, you were not and never will be good enough. You belong here, at the bottom, with the things discarded, the hated things, the things we regret! You are not enough-

The boy sobbed, his whole body shaking, feeling as if it wasn't the walls closing in on him but his very form itself. His being was suffocating from the inside out, and with no air, and all the warmth and blood pouring from his mouth, his eyes and ears... there was nothing to do but hug himself hopelessly, wishing beyond any other wish he'd ever made, that his screams were real and that maybe someone would hear him and wake him up.

I would give anything to be asleep beside Xie Yi-jun right now... I'd give it all if he could just wake me, hold me and maybe tell me that everything was a nightmare. It was all a dream and he does love me, I am enough!

Wen Reian was a fool for even wishing it, he knew...

How could I be so horrible?! To wish for his love when his heart itself is a stone by my own doing?

Reian, Wen Reian... learn your place! It is here; at the bottom of the well, where the selfish wishes go.