“This is ridiculous, my lady.”
“Don’t call me that, Talin.”
“Forgive me, my la–Commander Dolovan, but this is not acceptable. I cannot answer any questions raised about having prisoners in my quarters.”
“Oh relax, Talin. The only person who would dare to question you is the King. And if he does, I will be answering him for you. Are we settled then?”
It was a muffled conversation on the other side of the small wooden door to the room. And even though everyone in the room, including her own men who were accompanying Rami, Yulhan, and Noor, pretended no one was hearing a word of the conversation she was having with the resident of the very quarters, it was quite clear that they were barging into a place they had no business being in at such an ungodly hour.
Rami had been staring at the half eaten porridge on a small table shoved to the corner of a wall as if it was meticulously placed there to remind him of the constant hunger clawing its way up his throat, ever since he was forced to enter the place. He averted his gaze looking around the small place catching books, practically falling apart, towering one wall floor to ceiling as if they were bricks holding the place from falling apart. Another end of a wall was entirely occupied by a set up of ornate glass bulbs and jars, haphazardly placed on a large table, cooking something. The wall to his left looked to have been charred black leaving behind an outline of what seemed like the previous location of the experiment table. The entire place was chaos, strangely organized chaos.
The smell of something burning caught his attention. He looked behind to find a small glass jar sitting on a flame beginning to sear with whatever was inside it. It wasn’t just him, everyone else noticed it as well.
It was then that he finally got the chance to get a proper look at Commander Dolovan’s men surrounding him. He quickly noticed that they weren’t all men. Half of them were women twice the size of him that could easily snap his twig body in half. One of the women, her hair braided and her muscles twitching every now and then, stared back at Rami with her evergreen eyes as if her only duty in life was to have her eyes glued to him. He smiled but got nothing back in return.
The door thrashed open and Talin, an elderly man with a white fluffy beard, appeared disheveled in his dull baby blue night coat buttoned to the top. Everyone in the room, a dozen or so people crammed into his tiny quarters, looked at him at once. He took a step back, still baffled finding so many uninvited guests disturbing his sleep.
“The Smorthwater…the Smorthwater,” he mumbled as he shuffled to the glass jar that was beginning to change its color from green to black while being engulfed in flames. He put out the fire and began fanning the area making the burning smell dissipate about.
“Talin, I need your word,” Commander Dolovan was back in the room leaning against the closed door. Her black locks were pinned up and her armor removed revealing the awfully tight garments in stealth black she had been wearing underneath.
Talin whipped his head around in distaste. His eyes found Rami’s and a sigh came through as he stared back at him. “I cannot have a criminal in my quarters.”
A criminal…so that’s what I am now…
Rami thought to himself as he started piecing together the remnants of Azul’s identity he had been grasping onto.
“Well, I need a spy chamber–” Dolovan began, only to get cut off the very next moment.
“My quarters are not a spy chamber, my lady. You must request such things with the appropriate authorities. I am simply the royal physician. I need space, that I am clearly running out of, to do my research, advance in my craft, and most importantly take care of our King’s health. I’m not your–”
“Fine. I’ll request a chamber for myself but until then you will help me,” she demanded, “Five nights and I’ll be out of here.”
“Four! And I will need two of your people watching him,” he eyed Rami and continued, “at all times.”
Commander Dolovan smiled in agreement as if she won an argument she was bound to have lost if it wasn’t for the person she was arguing with. Talin knew so as well for his sigh that followed simply meant that she was sure to have won for he had a soft spot for his lady turned Commander demanding him of things only she could get away with.
Talin went back to clearing the awfully smelly jar and Dolovan advised some of her people to take leave. Rami looked to Yulhan and Noor, who had been silent all this while almost as if they had disappeared entirely from existence. Noor’s face was chalk white, as if he was about to pass out. He remained with his head lowered and staring intensely at his feet. Yulhan, however, was looking around, fascinated by the old man’s place. He seemed to be enjoying this terrible turn of events more than the rest of them.
Once the rest of the guards shuffled away leaving the necessary few, Talin forcefully bid goodnight holding onto a small plant as if it was some sort of emotional support animal and went off into an even smaller room the size of a closet and locked himself in it.
The guard who Rami attempted to smile with earlier walked past him and grabbed him by his shoulders, lifting him and seating him closer to the charred wall. “Remain calm, will you?” She spoke for the first time as Rami squirmed in her tight grasp.
All three of them stayed with their backs to the blackened wall as Dolovan pulled out a chair and sat herself in front of them.
She casually pulled an orange out of her pocket and started peeling it making the citrus spray mask the lingering burning smell. The fresh smell of fruit made Rami’s stomach grumble. They hadn’t had any food except for the bland breakfast stew that morning. He was gulping away looking at her, peeling her orange and tossing one of the wedges in her mouth.
“Before we get you something to eat,” she eyed Rami, whose stomach-grumbles were clearly audible, “I need you three to understand something.”
She munched on the next wedge intentionally before looking at Yulhan and Noor. Her finger pointed to Rami before continuing, “If this toad-head of a man has truly lost his mind, you two better pray and come up with a stellar plan to get what I need. For if not, I will make sure you and your families will never see the light of day. Are we understood?”
Her eyes glared. Noor and Yulhan exchanged troubled looks. It wasn’t like they were actual spies, they did not know the first thing about being a spy. And now they must pretend to be good at their fake-job and hope their necks continue to remain attached to their bodies.
Yulhan dared to look back at her and ask, “So you believe us, then? When we say he’s lost his mind?” He was curious. He wanted to know where she truly stood although she did not look to be someone to give it away that easily.
And yet she tilted her head and smirked, “To tell you the truth, I do. I do believe that more than anything else that came out of your mouth. Only because I know my enemy,” her eyes found Rami in his corner wilting away, “and I know for a fact he is not the Ascari everybody despises. He’s not the Ravenous everyone fears. He’s only…” she paused for a moment looking for the word, “...weak.”
#
Rami was in flames. Ever since Dolovan’s pointed answer to what she really thought of him the night before he had been fuming in anger. It started slowly as he began to accept that Azul was probably a prominent figure in a powerful position. But as he realized that the only thing that might be truly different between him and Azul were their souls, the intangible and unseen part of him, he began to feel bitter at Dolovan’s words.
Weak? She thinks I’m weak?…
He began to fester in his feelings trying to come up with an excuse thinking she only said so because Azul’s body was tortured and under-fed all this time and perhaps that made him look frail and weak. But distaste lingered on as her words repeated over and over in Rami’s head all night long making him believe that it was truly his soul radiating his meek personality through dominating Azul making him appear weak and frail in front of someone so authoritative like Commander Dolovan. He was beginning to think that something was indeed wrong with him, that his meekness was leaking out like a pipe about to burst. Despite the sour taste, these thoughts weren’t entirely unfamiliar to Rami for they were an almost daily occurrence from when he was back in his reality.
I must find a way to get back home…
He kept thinking as he tried his best to ward off the unwanted feelings of his capabilities and personality from muddying his one true wish of going back to where he came from even though he was not in a position to even begin thinking of such luxuries.
That morning, Talin reluctantly handed some breakfast to the three of them while Dolovan’s people watched over them waiting for their Commander to make an appearance any moment now. Rami was digging into the fresh bread as if it was the sweetest food he had been begging to eat his entire life, when Yulhan, seated in the middle, nudged him lightly, finding an opening where the guards were distracted speaking with each other.
“How are you feeling?” Yulhan whispered. Rami nodded mildly in return.
“I’m sorry about earlier…you know, ratting you out last night…to the enemy,” Yulhan’s apologetic face made Rami smile. As much as he was baffled that Yulhan revealed Rami’s weakness so blatantly to the one person who was hunting him all this time, he was thankful Yulhan was still on his side.
“It’s alright. Everything sort of worked out, didn’t it?” Rami replied and waited watching Yulhan’s face wither away as if Rami was completely clueless of what was to follow.
“Drink,” Talin, still in his dull blue night coat with disheveled white plumes of hair decorating him, forced silver cups with water to the three of them, wanting them to stop conversing with each other. He was still refusing to look directly at Rami. He was avoiding him in every way possible.
“You must be quite busy being the royal physician,” to everyone’s surprise Yulhan spoke up.
Both Rami and Noor looked at each other in surprise. Heck even the guards quietened themselves seeing Yulhan make a risky move.
Talin remained quiet for a moment before straightening his back to reply, “Of course, I am. The position of a royal physician isn’t anything easy by any means, boy. It is also the precise reason for the lack of hair on my head.”
Yulhan smiled eagerly in surprise. It was as if, despite his will, Talin was hoping to ease the pressure that was having the room in a chokehold this morning.
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Yulhan edged his seat and whispered back, “I have always dreamt of being a physician.”
Talin’s brow raised in question at the unexpected comment. Noor, who was closer to blending in with the furniture, suddenly nudged Yulhan to stop whatever he was doing. A quick silent bicker passed between the two before Talin broke the inaudible fight.
“Well, I hope one day you will. Although it might be a bit difficult for someone of your background…at least in the Southern Kingdom.” Silence followed Talin’s comment.
Rami thought Talin was referring to Yulhan, maybe being from a poor family, a boy from a distant village perhaps, or someone with a criminal background for they were pretending to be aiding a criminal on the run. But something made him notice that that wasn’t the case. Yulhan’s soft and slender facial features were a contrast to everyone surrounding him. And for the first time in Rami’s life, everyone in his midst looked like him in different shades of tan skin carrying similar features of big round eyes and prominent noses as he did. It came as a shocking realization that he was probably a part of the majority in Keimitaan. Azul was not a part of the minority like Rami was back in his world.
Rami’s eyes moved to Yulhan sitting there silently with shattered dreams which strangely did not appear to be a rather new experience for Yulhan judging by how he wore a scarred smile. Rami felt for his companion. A dream labeled unachievable because of how one looked seemed strangely familiar.
But Yulhan’s face lifted as he looked back at Talin, who parted lips about to say something, when the door to Talin’s small quarters burst open.
“Alright, you idiots! Enough eating. Time to get to work,” Dolovan’s voice ringed through activating her dormant guards as stress suddenly spiked in Rami’s brain.
Soon, Rami found himself back at the blackened wall. A tired Talin bid farewell and warned everyone not to burn his place down while he was out for work. While Dolovan’s people moved chairs and tables around, Yulhan managed to whisper a comment to Rami, “They must have run out of space in the dungeons for us, you know, having us in the royal physician’s chambers.”
Yulhan was itching to get those words out in private but unbeknownst to him, Dolovan had already picked up on it. She glared back at Yulhan and smirked.
“Oh, you are mistaken. The dungeons have plenty of room for the three of you and more. But we are not going to the dungeons this time simply because the dungeons mean I need to get paperwork done. And paperwork means I won’t have the free will to do whatever I want with you three.
You promised me, didn’t you? That you will help me infiltrate the Circle in return for your heads? How can you fulfill that promise if you are stuck in the dungeons?”
Her wicked smile irked Rami. And the longer he stared at it the harder that smile evoked absolute terror in him. He wasn’t sure what she had planned for him. He wasn’t sure if he would make it out alive.
#
“Coinmaster? Coin? Like money? I’m sorry but you have the wrong guy. I am not a coin master, I have little to no knowledge of coins or having collected coins and…,” Rami exhaled looking around with his eyes bulging as he explained his position again, “...I was more of a stamps guy, you know. I have experience collecting stamps since I was five…five! But I think I gave up on it when I turned twelve.”
He paused, finding Dolovan’s sharp eyes. To his surprise she remained silent with her gaze tightly wrapped around him making him realize his sudden outburst and infodump did not really help make his situation any better. In fact, it may have made it worse since Dolovan and company had been trying so desperately since the morning to assess the gravity of his memory loss as Azul. They even tried to make him come to his senses by reminding him of Azul’s way of life, showing him parts of the city that Azul would have frequented, and feeding him Azul’s rumored favorite food, steam buns from old Helena. All that effort was spent so diligently only to end up fruitless with a well-fed blabbing buffoon who kept forgetting that he could have his head nicked straight off for suddenly bursting in energy and going off on his fossilized hobby of stamp-collecting.
“Maybe we punch him in the face? Or perhaps a hit to the side of his head with a hard rock. A proper knock should set him straight,” the annoyed words of one of Dolovan’s guard’s reached his ears. Rami found that it was the same guard who stared him down last night that had given the new idea.
A whisper of giggles ran through only to get hushed as Dolovan raised her arm silencing them.
She sighed a couple of times while brushing her hair away from her face before she stood up and pushed Rami back into his seat.
“We can’t have him injured and we don’t have enough time to try more elaborate and interesting ideas to get him to remember his old ways. For now, we keep at this,” Dolovan said, making Yulhan, seated next to Rami, perk up and nudge Noor, who seemed to have dozed off.
The three of them sat in an orderly manner facing a wall with a chalkboard hung up there with words scribbled on it. They had been staring at the board for two hours ever since the sun peaked in the sky and they had lunch and Rami was escorted back and forth from the toilets which he referred to as restrooms earlier and had Dolovan going, “This is your rest room. This is where you rest although you should be shaking in your boots in my presence.” It took her and everybody else a while to realize Rami wanted to take a piss before he folded in half trying to control the urge while explaining himself.
Dolovan brought the thin piece of chalk up once more. For two hours she had been explaining to Rami all the background needed for him to understand and survive this new world he was to embark and complete the mission she needed done in exchange for their lives. And for two hours he had retained nothing. In fact, he simply stared at the words on the board, unable to quite pinpoint if he was truly seeing the words written down in English or not, for as far as he knew the letters on the board were much curvier in style and looked oddly spaced, but his brain had somehow understood them perfectly well, as if he had known an entire language he had never studied or seen all along. He wondered then, if he was even speaking in his familiar language anymore.
The piece of chalk snapped in half as her rage peeked and she whispered harshly trying to contain the anger bubbling up inside her, “You fucking idiot!”
Rami froze in his chair. So did Yulhan and Noor, who had contributed minimally to anything the entire day. Dolovan’s flaming eyes fell on Rami as she crushed the piece of chalk in her hand in anger.
“Please, let’s all just calm down–” Yulhan only tried before watching Dolovan’s hand go up to silence him.
“Fine,” she capitulated and breathed in deeply before calming herself and looking at Rami once more, “If we are not going to have you remember your past, we are going to have you memorize it. I’m going to only repeat this once. You can stop me if you have a question but you must have this memorized by the end of this hour.”
Rami nodded. To him all the questions and tantrums he had thrown thus far were fair. He himself found it odd that he was capable of throwing a tantrum seeing how his usual response would have been a firm nod with a pursed lip smile back in his reality. But today, he was up on his heels and arguing back at the woman who held the authority to let him drop dead or walk alive. It begged the question, does having nothing lose push you to act as your true self, speak your mind freely? The inevitability of death was present in both realities for Rami, but here as Azul, he had nothing but his beating heart to lose. He was strangely free from his worldly shackles.
But it had to all end now, he had to concentrate, for she seemed to be done playing games.
Dolovan pointed to the chalkboard once more, taking a deep breath hoping Rami would not interrupt or burst out again. She started speaking loudly and clearly pointing to the words written at the very top.
“The Circle of Daggers, established only a mere twenty years ago, went from an unknown group of thieves to the most dangerous crime syndicate in all of Keimitaan. I noticed you smiled at the name earlier,” she glared at Rami for Rami found the name quite cute, “You must have found it funny, so did everyone twenty years ago. But no one seems to be laughing any more.”
Rami gulped glancing over at Yulhan and Noor who seemed to be too engrossed in Dolovan’s presentation. She tapped her finger at the first most name written on the board.
“Nanji Kaalu, overlord of the Circle of Daggers, the guild master. He started as a thief essentially from birth. His birth mother was a beggar before he found himself a part of the outlaws and soon made it to the world of crime in big cities. The Circle of Daggers has been his most successful establishment yet. They say he is one of the few men to ever reach such success for so long practically untouched by the King’s guards and expanding his territory within the city with almost a quarter of Keimitaan under his finger. He has committed so much crime that he's known by a different name in the streets altogether. Anyone care to contribute what that is?”
Dolovan waited for some audience interaction although she had given the answer to her question in the previous runs. Soon, one of her guards chimed in, “Black Heart.”
“Black heart, he is,” Dolovan looked to Rami and continued, “If there’s one thing you take away from this is to never trust Black Heart. His heart is stone cold and withered, it warms for no one. There’s a reason why he was given such a name well before he ever appeared in Keimitaan.”
Dolovan waited watching Rami’s lips part to finally spit out his question. “If Black Heart and his organization is so…threatening, why doesn’t the King just take him out?”
Dolovan paused for a moment thinking of the right words, “The Circle of Daggers was considered the lesser evil for the past two decades by the rulers of the Southern Kingdom. And by being left alone by the Kingdom for so long they grew significantly every passing year. With the never ending war in the South West and the lack of resources the King had to make a decision and pick the battle he wanted to fight.”
“Then why now? Why infiltrate the Circle now?” Yulhan asked almost immediately.
“Perhaps the King changed his mind,” Dolovan only avoided answering it directly and quickly turned back to the board.
“Next, the Circle of Daggers most valued members directly under Black Heart. First up, the Counselor, Kamaru Azil, an old pig greedy for money. He used to be a nobleman by birth but ended up committing crime in his young age carving out a different path for himself. He was far too obsessed with his killings that he got a special nickname for the type of method he specialized in, the Choker. He essentially came out of retirement for Black Heart. Now he simply advises the Circle.”
“Advises?” Rami asked, innocently.
“Let’s say he uses his connections already established through his noble upbringing to cover up and tip off the Circle on how exactly to maneuver elaborate crimes and hide in plain sight,” Dolovan answered.
“Next, we move on to the Vizier, the administrator for all of the Circles operations. The Vizier of the Circle was a well known businessman in the early days. He’s mostly known as Butcher in the streets, not only because he butchered livestock during the day but also because he butchered humans for coins during the night. Butcher’s real name is still unknown to this day. Maybe that’s something you will find out and let me know. And something good will actually come out of this.”
Dolovan’s wicked smile fell on Rami. He couldn’t help but gulp. The previous versions of Dolovan’s explanations were pretty general as if she was dipping his toes into the cesspool of madness. But this time around she was pointed and revealing it in all its glory.
The chalk tapped on the board once more, “Next, my favorite, Elyan Vaheez, better known as Venom. The rumor has it that Azul and Elyan started with the Circle around the same time at the humble age of twelve. It even goes as far as stating they were friends at first and slowly came to the realization how good the other was at the trade and started their life long rivalry and competition of who could impress Black heart the most. It just goes to show how far determination to see the other fall can get you, doesn’t it? He is now the Spymaster of the Circle of daggers, essentially the head of intelligence and espionage. Nothing ever goes under his nose. I’m surprised I found you three before he did.”
Rami watched as she pointed to the last name up on the board. His eye twitched as the letters read the name of who he should be in this reality.
“Lastly, one of the most celebrated members of the Circle, Azul Ascari. A runaway and an orphan that made his way up the chain and finally established himself as the coin-master of the most valuable organization in all of Keimitaan. There are many stories on how the high rankers of the Circle clawed their way through to the top but Ascari’s story is arguably the most famous of them all…” Dolovan grabbed an empty chair and turned it around to sit resting her chin on the edge taking a deeper look into Rami’s widened eyes, “...Ascari’s known to have started at the Circle as a humble worker, a smuggler boy, while under his then master until he would one day outsmart his very master and ruthlessly replace him. He’s known to have done it a few times over before he garnered the attention of Black Heart ultimately leading him to be appointed the coin master, the head of treasury and finances in the Circle.
He’s known to be quick on his feet and predicting the turn of events better than anyone else. If Venom knew everything that was happening in Keimitaan, Ascari knew it before it even happened. He’s known to be a master manipulator, getting what he needed from the unaware, nudging them little by little then gobbling them all at once leaving nothing but a trail of dust after him.
Because of his ruthlessness and his hunger for money and status he is known by a name given to him since the early days in the Circle. No one ever utters his real name anymore, no one dares to.”
She stopped, staring at Rami seeing him fidget in his seat and try avoiding her gaze. He couldn’t help it. She was describing a person he never was and could never be. He dared to look back at her and ask her, “So, what is it? What do they call him?”
She smirked seeing through his shell trying to contain his fear from oozing out. She tilted her chin to ask back, “Did you mean to say what do they call you? Because you are Azul Ascari even if you claim that you’ve lost your mind, not remembering who you are or have been. And even if you argue that you are not, I need you to be Azul Ascari from here on. I need you to embody him. I need you to convince me that you are Azul, that you are the ruthless coinmaster of the Circle of Daggers. And to answer your question, they call you Ravenous, voracious in nature and hungry for all that glory.”