Rami sat at the edge of his chair terrified of what was to follow. His heels were plastered together and his hands clasped tightly making the sweat beading his palms pool at his fingertips. A sudden noise in the outside corridor startled his quiet soul as he turned to check on it. It was nothing, perhaps the office workers shuffling around doing their job.

The barely there air conditioning was white noise to the awfully quiet office of his supervisor he was in this morning. Large stacks of paper towered the walls as if there was a shortage of cabinets in the current economy. “The company likes to skimp on every dollar,” his stumpy supervisor had once said when one of Rami’s unnecessarily loud coworkers had attempted to make a joke out of it during one of the company dinners not too long ago.

But Rami knew better. He knew his difficult boss was only mad enough to refuse the offer for cabinets every year just to flaunt how very devout he was to his work, as if stacking papers and files proved that. Rami had been in the company long enough to witness it five times already. It had been that long. It had already been five years since he first stepped foot in the building. Five years that had gone by excruciatingly fast.

The door to the office thrashed open sending a light shock wave through Rami’s spine. Rami immediately bolted to his feet, greeting his supervisor. Rami’s boss, wearing a tight shirt about to burst through if it wasn’t for that last brown button holding on to dear life, threw a glare across Rami’s way.

“Um...the meeting. You–you scheduled a meeting.” Rami blurted out hoping that slight crack in his voice went unheard.

His supervisor took a moment then nodded before pushing the door close and heading to his unusually large chair enveloping the small desk.

“Glad to have you here, Rami. Glad to have you here,” he said, taking a heavy seat and immediately beginning to clear his desk while letting words that meant nothing fill the silence. Rami pursed his lips attempting the ‘corporate smile’ hoping it would be an excellent mask covering for his awful conversational skills.

“Thank you, Derek,” Rami said, giving a quick wipe over his forehead already beading with sweat.

Once Derek was done clearing his desk, he started clunking on his keyboard with his stubby fingers while squinting his eyes trying to pull something up on his bright monitor.

“So tell me, Rami, how has everything been so far this year? I hear you are doing excellent with the new project,” Derek only kept his eyes glued to the screen at his side.

Rami, slightly shaken, breathed deeply before answering, “Yes, of course. It has been great.”

“You do know that corporate’s got their eyes on it, don’t you? Ever since I pitched that project, they have been over the moon about it, waiting for us to show what we’ve got.” Rami felt a pang in his heart. It was his idea, he was the one that pitched it to Derek, and for all he knew Derek was taking all the credit for it.

“Yes, of course. I am aware of it…” Rami paused for a moment clutching onto his fingers in desperate help. He was here today for a reason, to accomplish a task that needed to be done a few weeks ago. It was time. He needed to ask the question without putting it off any longer. “...I–I was actually wanting to–” Rami started in a small voice but Derek only interjected loudly.

“You are doing great, Rami. I do not have any notes for you, not one. Unlike Stacy, she has been slacking off too many times. I heard she slept at her desk the other day. That girl is bound to get fired by the end of this month…”

Rami knew Derek’s play. Derek was too good at it. He would let his mouth run when it was time for one of his subordinates to speak their mind.

“...I must say, Rami, I knew we made a great decision hiring you. Even though you had no prior work experience and only two years of higher education, you picked up everything in a matter of days. Great job, my boy,” Derek smiled widely, letting all his adult teeth show through as if to scare Rami rather than show genuine happiness.

A beat of silence passed as Rami smiled and nodded in acceptance. Not wanting to let the chance go he jumped to it.

“I was actually wanting to remind you, Derek. You–you asked me to remind you actually, about the–the promotion,” his words barely sounded out.

“The what?”

“The promotion. You said you would speak with the director about my promotion,” Rami spoke louder hoping he wouldn’t shatter to pieces letting his voice go above his usual threshold.

It was just last year during the same meeting to speak about growth that Rami innocently mentioned wanting to go for a promotion. Derek had clapped his hands and rubbed Rami’s shoulders to say it was absolutely possible and that he had been an excellent candidate for the past four years. Ever since then Rami had taken on more, worked late, and had exceeded everyone’s expectations. Derek even raised Rami’s hopes six months ago when he promised he would push for a promotion for all the excellent work he was doing.

Rami felt the adrenaline pounding against his being. And the more he looked at Derek the more the inevitable answer was dawning upon him. His supervisor’s face, glued back to the excruciatingly bright monitor, only soured as time passed and the obvious silence grew. The excited nervousness in Rami grew smaller and a pain started to manifest itself in his guts. It was not like he had asked for this out of nowhere. Derek knew this was coming. Heck, Derek even promised Rami he would get prompted instantly. It fueled him ever since. All those promises asking him to hold on for one more year were due today.

Derek cleared his throat and scratched his neck still invested in the screen in front of him. “Well, I did speak with the director, Rami, about your progress…” his usually loud voice only made a squeak.

Rami beamed hoping his instincts were wrong. “...Let me make it clear that we are all very very impressed by your work, truly…” But Rami wanted to hear him talk about the promotion. He could no longer be earning the same salary he made five years ago for the large amount of work he was doing now. He could no longer do it for another year.

“...Unfortunately, the company has no room to promote you at this time…”

Rami’s heart dropped. His round dark brown eyes only widened while staring at Derek. The initial shock only grew worse as he kept listening to Derek’s excuses on behalf of the company.

“...As you know, the company is barely scraping by. We had to prioritize the people who had been in line before you. I assure you though, you are in there, my boy. You’ll have your chance soon.”

Rami only swallowed his pain and smiled awkwardly. It wasn’t as if he wasn’t fed into the delusion that his hard work would get paid off soon. It was blatantly obvious he was outperforming everyone. And yet he sat there and took it with pursed lips and an approving head nod.

Rami kept smiling even after he left Derek’s office and walked his way, almost stumbling on his own feet, to his little corner cubicle by the restrooms that usually had the restroom doors bang on the walls each time someone walked through them.

His eyes darted to his monitor showing the same picture of the blue skies with green mountains and the large font of numbers showing the time ticking away. As an accounts analyst in the Midwestern utility company, one of the largest corporations in the entire State, he was too used to staring into the massive company logo of a cog plastered in the middle of his home screen as if to remind him where he worked every day, every moment. By the time he fully realized he was back at his desk, his pain had divulged into anger. Sure, he was the least credentialed person on his team but he worked the hardest, the longest. He took on so much he thought it would pay off in the end. Each year he was sure he was getting closer to his goal. And now he was slowly beginning to realize the bitter truth. He was stuck in a hamster wheel. A hamster wheel he had somehow meticulously crammed himself into willingly.

A knuckle tapped the side of his cubicle instantly releasing him from his thoughts. Rami’s neck twisted to greet the person at his desk.

“How’d it go?”

It was Sam, the only one at the office who cared to speak with quiet and recluse Rami. Rami always thought it was simply because Sam had his nose up everyone’s business and regularly gossiped around the office lazily walking through the corridors with nothing of value to add.

Rami pursed his lips giving that corporate smile again and said, “It went well.”

“Oh great! So I take it you are getting the promotion then, huh?” Sam smiled, pulling out a bag of fresh grapes from his pocket and tossing one in his mouth.

Rami grimaced before following it up with another corporate smile.

“Not this time. Next time.”

Sam immediately wrinkled his nose. “Next time? That’s odd.”

Rami stared at Sam waiting for Sam’s explanation of why he found it so odd, for Sam’s conclusions typically contained a detailed explanation of how all the big companies were taking advantage of their workforce and then immediately follow it up with suggestions on how Rami could dismantle the entire organization at once.

But Sam only remained silent this time tossing another green grape in his mouth before smiling wide to say, “Oh well, next time it is, then.”

Rami wanted to spit back a perfect comeback but eventually, he resorted to rolling his eyes and mouthing ‘Weirdo’ so Sam would not see his lips.

“You going to join us for lunch?”

Rami shook his head to turn back to his screen, “I’ve got some documentation to finish up.”

He expected Sam to poke fun at him for being antisocial like he always did, but Sam only nodded and skipped to the break room around the corner just in time to not hear Rami’s stomach growl loudly.

That afternoon Rami ate his lunch at his desk while clicking away with his free hand. His anger that had built up had cooled leaving a trail of sourness engulfing his mind. He had settled it, however, even before thinking it through, that his best course of action was to work even harder, show that he truly deserved it, and maybe next time, which was a year from now, he would finally be promoted.

He slurped the last few drops of water in his tumbler before his feet automatically found themselves walking to the break room to fill it up. He was almost around the corner when he picked up on Sam’s voice, loud and clear.

This tale has been unlawfully obtained from Royal Road. If you discover it on Amazon, kindly report it.

“Well, I’m glad Tammy got promoted. I heard they promoted twice as much as last year. But poor Rami did not get his. Who could blame corporate, he does not know how to push for it.”

A few snickers and giggles from ladies gathered around Sam bubbled up. Rami’s feet came to an instant stop right behind the wall of the break room. His eyes rounded in shock and his cheeks began to burn in embarrassment.

“Poor Rami, I wonder how long he would last, honestly,” one of the ladies chimed in.

“Well, you cannot really blame him for it though, Sam. I heard Christopher got the promotion instead of Rami this time,” an older woman spoke, erupting a slew of gasps.

“Christopher? You mean Christopher, who joined Derek’s team barely six months ago?” Sam asked enthusiastically. His voice dripped with happiness listening to gossip.

“Yes! Christopher, Derek’s nephew, Christopher.”

The tumbler between Rami’s fingers almost dropped to the floor. He had no idea Christopher, who Rami was training all this time, got promoted over him. The very Christopher who kicked his feet up on his desk and munched away on snacks all day while doing absolutely nothing. That anger that had subsided before came rushing in. Fury erupted in Rami’s heart making him begin to breathe louder by the minute. He immediately turned on his heels.

His nephew? Christopher is his nephew?!

Rami’s mind was racing with insults he wanted so desperately to spit out. His feet picked up pace and he was soon stomping to the very office he was in, hunched over and meek, only an hour ago. His shoulders were out and his fingers gripped his empty tumbler tightly as if he was ready to thrash it across the office in anger. He was ready, his mind was ready with demands and questions as to why he was denied the promotion over Derek’s own nephew. He turned the corner and marched to Derek’s office. He raised his hand about to thrash his knuckles on Derek’s door when it suddenly propped open startling Rami.

Derek appeared looking up in question. His knit eyebrows and overall smug face stared back at his employee in distaste. “What?” Derek asked, eyeing Rami’s fist that was held up.

Rami immediately hid his hand behind his back in embarrassment. His fury had vanished. His previously determined mind was instantly filled with doubt and fear, a much familiar feeling. Those pursed lips were once again etched on Rami’s face in a desperate attempt to hide his previous intentions.

Derek only eyed Rami up and down once more before going about his way and leaving Rami standing there alone and disappointed.

Typical…

Rami thought, dropping his shoulders, as familiar disappointment clung to his being. He had gotten worked up for nothing. It was just as all the previous times, the times when he was so determined to stand up for himself and finally question authority. But every time he was left standing alone, by himself, blaming himself for not having the courage or the skill to speak up. He turned as his footsteps fell into the sad rhythm of walking back to his desk while loathing his tolerable self, ruminating on his embarrassingly pitiful life.

#

Rami’s eyes caught the evening rolling in. The setting sun colored the sky a bright orange then dimmed into a dull blue. He finally stood from his office chair to start packing his backpack to head out for the day.

The office was empty. The mundane cubicles separated by gray partitions looked like a boring puzzle from Rami’s corner view. It felt so bare with no one around but peaceful that Rami was not anxious to take in the view with no one to judge him.

He took his leave through the dingy elevator that used to jump-scare him for almost a month when he first joined the company. He remembered his excitement then, to be finally working in a firm making a living like he hoped he would. But tonight he felt that excitement nowhere to be seen. He felt trapped, a trap he had meticulously got himself into that seemingly had no plans of letting him go for years to come.

The air outside was dense as he walked out of the office building and stood at the pedestrian crossing waiting for the little red man in the walk-sign to turn green. He wondered if this was it. If he would just be stuck in life like the little red man, in anger and constantly tired at the end of day for the rest of his life. He wondered if it would ever turn green for him and if it would ever work out for him.

Without realizing he had stepped onto the crossing having his eyes glued to the red man that was supposed to have stopped him. A loud honk startled his being, throwing Rami into an instant shock and immediately pulling back onto the sidewalk. The taxi that had honked whipped past him making him breathe deeply shaking his head trying to pull himself out of it. It was not typical for Rami to act so carelessly, almost walking onto the busy road without realizing it. And typically Rami would beat himself up for being so careless the very next second. But today he felt too tired to even worry about how he could have gotten run over a second ago. Today he felt so empty, so aimless to be worrying about something so trivial.

Thankfully Rami’s little apartment was only a few blocks away. Strangely, it was the only affordable place he could find that happened to be fairly close to work. He often thought it was a curse in disguise for he could tempt himself to work longer for he had such a short commute.

He opened the door to his cramped apartment that looked barely lived in. His couch was rigid and unwelcoming. His bed was on the floor in a corner. And his kitchen was stocked with instant ramen, the only food he ever needed. Without a second thought, he slipped into some home clothes and started to make his usual dinner. He was just done pouring some steaming water into the cup when a phone call from his mother made him widen his eyes in surprise. He bit his lips, rethinking if he should answer it.

“Hi, Ma!”

“Rami! How are you, my son? Am I disturbing you?” she asked softly, melting Rami’s heart.

“Not at all. I was just um– having some noodles.”

“Oh! Did you cook?” his mother’s question made him crinkle his eyes. He hated lying to her.

“Ye–Yes, I did.”

“Oh! Wonderful! I’m glad you are finally cooking your meals. But before I ask more about your dinner, tell me, Rami, did you ask him? Did you ask for the promotion? What did they say?”

It took a while for Rami to gather his thoughts. He had forgotten that he had mentioned the promotion to his mother, his sweet mother, who always cheered him on.

“I uh– well, you see. I–,” he started, hoping not to sound so suspicious. He grabbed his ramen cup to open it and let the dense hot vapor engulf his face partially hoping he would disappear then and there.

A moment of silence passed before Rami started stuttering again but his mother only stopped him halfway through this time to say softly, “It’s alright if it did not go well, dear. You can always try again later.”

Maybe it was because he did not expect her to figure it out as soon as she had heard his voice, the tears he was holding rolled down his face as he sat there silently staring into his ramen that was going cold. He wanted to complain. He wanted to tell her how unfairly he was being treated and how much he desired to quit and start over. He wanted to rant about his boss, his boss’s nephew, and everyone else who had somehow made it over the hill leaving him behind. He wanted so desperately to cry out in frustration and blame the world. But he only remained silent listening to his mother.

“It will be alright, dear,” his mother repeated, “Sometimes the things we want the most won’t catch up to us until we are truly ready for them.”

Rami grew up in a small hometown sheltered and surrounded by people like him, people who despite not being his family, were mostly immigrants sharing an unspoken bond. The day he left his small suburban town everyone made sure to tell him how lucky he was to be supported by his widowed mother through school and community college and that now it was his turn to support her back. Ever since that last car ride to the airport, he had been nothing but itching to quickly power through, climb the ladder, and make his mother proud. But now after five grueling years, he was still where he started. Nothing had changed, not even Rami himself.

“I wish you would come visit me this summer, Rami. If you have time that is. I wish to see you like how you were back then. When you were so happy growing up playing in the little treehouse in the backyard with your friend so full of energy,” his mother reminisced as Rami’s mind traveled back to a time when he wasn’t so crippled with anxiety every day. He remembered himself as being cheery and witty. He remembered being free. But now he felt his own personality vanish day by day as the weight of the world crushed him inch by inch as years passed on.

He exchanged goodnights with his mother to finally rest his head on his flat pillow. The sudden resurgence of memories of his childhood had him staring at the neatly placed collection of worn-in books. Amongst them was a classic, ‘Peter Pan’. He remembered reading it cover to cover with his friend when he was only six as they pretended to fly around the backyard hoping to one day leap from the tree house and be airborne. They were his most cherished memories of his childhood. And with time his life somehow turned into a lifetime of crippling pain that he could never seem to escape.

He let his eyes grace past the window looking out into the moonlight shining down on the empty street. Insomnia was a friend to Rami when he was younger but now it was becoming a hassle. Tonight of all the nights he wished so desperately that he would fall asleep and never wake up.

#

To Rami’s dismay, he was up before six the next morning and was staring at his broken coffee machine dripping coffee so painfully slowly. His joints ached and his neck was stiff. For a moment, he contemplated taking a sick day.

Damn them!

He thought, wanting to take the day off and rest despite Derek warning everyone to put in a day off at least a month ahead. But the white digital clock he stuck to his kitchen wall ticked away making him anxious by the second. And before he knew it he was chugging the coffee down his throat and running to get his work clothes on to dash out of his apartment.

It was a gloomy morning with the sun barely out. Rami’s brain was already running with all the to-do’s while he tucked his shirt once more and let his hand run through his dark hair hoping he looked presentable enough. A slight crowd surrounded him. It was the early morning crew getting to work just like him. They all came to a stop at the crossing. The red man at the end held them in anticipation.

Rami watched as a few folks started jaywalking despite the cars speeding through. He didn’t mind anyone breaking rules, but he made sure he was not one to break them. That was Rami, the meek rule-follower that nobody took notice of.

Soon the red man turned green. Rami’s face lifted and he sprung onto the crossing without a second to lose. He was about halfway through when suddenly he felt a shift in the air about him. A loud screeching noise took over the street. Rami snapped his head to find the source when he spotted headlights speeding toward him like a bull that had found its target.

In a second, he felt himself crash against something hard, as hard as a concrete wall. A loud ring rang across from ear to ear muffling the surrounding sound. His head lifted to the sky as his body ejected off the ground freeing him from gravity. It was as if he was a bird flying through the early morning fog. Maybe this was what it felt like to be free of the artificial shackles he held himself in. Maybe this was what it felt for Rami to finally be released of the nauseating burden he carried on his shoulders day after day.

And just as he was beginning to enjoy it, his body came crashing onto the ground. Rami watched the blue sky start bursting to life as static filled it like stars.

Stars…in the morning…

A thought passed before pain erupted and his vision died out.

#

“Wake up,” a faint voice spoke. “Wake up, you imbecile!”

Ice-cold water hit his face at once. Rami flashed his eyes open in shock. Loud heaving took over as water streamed down his face while his eyes blinked vigorously trying to form a vision of whatever that had shocked him awake.

Darkness was all Rami saw at first. His nose, however, instantly picked up the smell of piss and blood, making him doubt whether he truly wanted to see his surroundings at all. He stayed still till his eyes adjusted to the darkness and finally began to make out that he was in a dark room with moonlight seeping in through a tiny window at the very edge of a wall.

A second wave of the smell of piss suddenly caught up to him making him gag before he realized his entire body felt immobile. He tried moving his neck but failed, which he then quickly gathered was because his arms were chained to two opposite walls as if to tear his body in half. He looked below to see himself fully naked, his feet barely reaching the ground beneath. He was hanging by his wrists. His limbs had fully given up on him.

The pain suddenly caught up and pulsated throughout his body making him groan loudly. It was the most excruciating pain he had ever felt. His muscles felt as though they were about to fall off, piece by piece. His breath was barely present, making him wonder if he was dreaming, stuck in a nightmare.

Whip!

Rami felt something sleek and weightless touch his back. For a moment he felt nothing. But soon the searing pain began to travel through his body as he shrieked in pain, sending his cries echoing between the walls. His eyes swelled in tears, his body shuddered in pain as a second whip came down on his back.

What is this? This is not a dream! Where am I?!

He wanted to shout. He wanted to scream to stop this agony yet all he could do was subside to groaning in pain. He couldn’t even form a proper word. His throat was dry and his lips were cracked and bloodied.

A hand grabbed his chin making him let out a weak yell in pain. But he stopped as his vision formed and he was looking into two piercing dark eyes.

“Thought we had killed you earlier. Glad to see you hanging on, you bastard.”