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Nothingness

I feel so empty inside. My days are dull, and my nights are filled with nothingness. All I do is stare at my laptop screen, browsing, wasting away precious hours that could be used to better myself. There is no motivation, there is nothing inside my soul. Emotions are sparse, the only joy, sadness, and anger I feel is surface level. It’s as though I am a shell, a husk of a being and nothing more. Even at this moment, as I look at my screen, I am completely empty of thought.

As I continue to stare, the screen blackens, and then reawakens with nothing but static imagery. Confusion enters my mind as I press several buttons on the keyboard. Even as I attempt to power it off, it remains in a static state, black and white rapidly flashing across the screen. I slam the device shut and put my hands on my face.

An intense headache rolls over my head, so painful that I am forced to drop to the ground. Nausea invades my sense of being, the urge to vomit is extreme. I am unable to make it to the toilet as I hurl liquid out of my mouth. However, instead of receiving the awful, metallically sick taste of semi-digested food, I am left with a different flavor, a different texture. A deep, black, oil-like substance begins to pour from my mouth uncontrollably. It’s as if my entire body is compressing within itself to release all the crude fuel found deep in the Earth.

After several minutes, I am able to catch my breath as I collapse in the pool of dreadful oil. I lift my head slowly and stare at the filth beneath me. Strangely enough, it does not stick to me, or stay on my clothes. It’s as if it’s an entirely separate entity not of this world. As I focus on the mess, a figure slowly rises from the oil in my room, completely black. Terrified, I back away to the corner, trying to create as much space as possible, yet there is no where to go.

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The figure reaches its full height, resembling a human form completely covered in the oil-like substance. No discernible features can be seen. The figure slowly approaches my position, the remaining black liquid following behind, as if attracted like a magnet. As the humanoid object stands only a few feet from me, it lowers its empty face to mine.

Eyes emerge from the oil, overly large and utterly terrifying. A wide grin with jagged, decaying teeth is formed as well, stretching across its entire face to impossible proportions. As the mouth opens, a loud, unholy sound is produced. Laughter. Both ear piercing and so low in frequency that I could feel the floor vibrate. I cover my ears with my hands and close my eyes, praying for the nightmare to end.

The figure grabs my hands with its own and forces me to look, as my eyes are mysteriously opened for me. The figure places its own face inches from mine and stares into my soul. Its eyes are blacker than the deepest of voids. I hear a low bellow come from the creature, “Do not fear, for you know me just as much as you know yourself, you are me, and I am you.”

The wide grin returns, the eyes piercing my soul. The entity uses its hands to grasp my jaw, one hand on the roof of my mouth, the other on the bottom. I feel my mouth stretch and stretch, until it is impossibly wide. I am paralyzed, I can do nothing but remain as I always am, still.

The terrible sickness I felt before returned as I felt a plethora of the oil enter my mouth, it slowly sliding down my throat. I feel my eyes roll into the back of my head as my mind retreats from thought. My suffering continues till there is none of the oily liquid remaining.

I cough, but it feels as though the liquid was never there. As the sick feeling disappears, my emptiness returns. My fear of the monster, my feelings of relief, my confusion, all evaporate.

I return to my bed and open my laptop, the screen normal once more. I lay back down in my bed and continue to scroll, feeding the nothingness within my soul, for he is me, and I am him.