I glanced up at the clock on the wall above the sink and realized that my friends were a full 40 minutes early. Although I hadn’t heard a car yet, the expression on Caleb’s face told me that he did.
I wiped my hands on the dish rag and rehung it over the oven door handle to dry. I pulled the simmering pot of spaghetti off the open flame and placed it on one of the back burners to cool. He could reheat it later for dinner if he got hungry. He wasn't a big fan of pasta but it was what I had left in the pantry as our supplies dwindled from our last trip into town two weeks ago.
“They’re near here,” Caleb stated, his voice laced with irritation a scowl of disapproval on his angelic face.
“I told you we could work on getting the gate open tomorrow. I promise,” I reassured him, hoping to ease out of the potential argument that was about to erupt. I could feel it brewing in the air around me.
Caleb’s eyes narrowed as he glared at me. “You promised me that yesterday,” he said, his voice was low and menacing and so out of character for him.
Over the weeks that followed our failed attempt at getting him home, he had become more and more short-tempered and sullen with me. Like it was all my fault that I hadn’t figured it out yet. It wasn't like you couldn’t just Google “How to open inter-dimensional doors,” and expect to get a professional scientific answer or even a spiritual one that would actually be helpful. I desperately needed a break
Besides, what would one more day harm at this stage of the game? We were no closer to figuring things out than we had been yesterday. And I needed a mindless night off from all the stress. Maybe it would help me think clearer tomorrow.
As I maneuvered around him, I neared the door that led out from the kitchen to the back deck. I felt a rush of wind ruffle the hairs on my arm as he swiftly intercepted my path, causing me to abruptly halt in my tracks. This display of aggression was so unsettling to me and it was getting old really quick.
I did find it strange how some of his abilities worked here while others did not. Another note to add to the millions of questions that I had about The Veil and why it existed. It deepened my curiosity about how and why it tethered our two worlds and if there was a possibility that there were others like it. But I was happy to leave that mind fuck for another day.
As I reached for the handle, his hand came down hard at the top of the door holding it shut, the sound making me jump a little but I did my best to disguise my surprise that was mixed with a little bit of nervousness.
He stood there, towering over me, like a menacing figure ready to advance. Most people would have retreated in fear, however, I knew him better than he knew himself most of the time and I wasn’t going to be bullied in my own world. I refused to be intimidated. So with a defiant snarl, I crossed my arms over my chest and stared up at him, he had brute strength to stop me if he wanted to, but I knew he didn’t have the balls.
I could feel the tension crackling in the air between us, like a live wire touching metal. All I wanted was to leave, to escape this room and him and have a moment’s peace. I deserved a day to breathe and I refused to allow him to make me feel like a bad person for it.
He withdrew his hand from the door and mirrored my stance. His posture was so irritating, it reminded me of a small child about to stomp his foot and pitch a fit for not getting what he wanted for Christmas. And I hated that it was a reflection of me, again forcing me to shift my weight and placed my hands on my hips instead, not that was any better but at least it showed I was willing to talk instead of blocking him out. And I told myself if he made an elementary school move by copying me again, I’d slap him.
We stood there, locked in a standoff, neither of us willing to back down. The tension in the room was resentful from both ends, and I could feel my frustration mounting with each passing second. But I knew I had to keep my cool if I wanted to resolve this.
Finally, I broke, “I can’t fix this,” I said, trying to bring the situation down a notch. “At least not right now. So let me clear my head, and hopefully, I’ll think of something soon. Tomorrow is a new day.” I said, trying to sound positive hoping to pacify him so I could slip past him and out the door.
“So you care more about a fun night out with your friends than you do about our safety, is that what you’re telling me?” he asked, his voice laced with anger and disappointment.
“I care about both,” I said, trying to keep my voice steady. “Besides, I can’t just not go. That would raise even more suspicion. And Dana would be kicking in my front door and dragging me out by my hair tonight, are you kidding me? I had to do something to appease her.” He shook his head, his eyes narrowing. “You’re putting yourself and everyone else in danger to go out and party. So don’t try and pretend it’s anything more than that.”
“If that is what you want to believe then nothing I say is going to change your mind. So step aside, won’t you?”
As I looked at him, I couldn’t help but feel a pang of hurt in my heart. He had hurt me so deeply, and yet, here I was, still trying to salvage what was left of our friendship, despite his shitty attitude and all the pain he had caused me.
I felt my resolve begin to waver.
It wasn’t easy then and it wasn't easy now, but love was love, and I loved him first as a friend before we were ever lovers and I couldn’t bear the thought of not having him in my life even after our breakup nearly destroyed me. But my heart knew I would keep patching the holes as they arose so we didn't sink.
As I watched him act like a brooding brat for the past several weeks, I couldn’t help but wonder if it was worth it anymore. Because his accusations hurt me down to my core. Didn’t he realize it was only for his health and well-being that I was even willing to jump dimensions again? If only he could understand that my love for him was the only reason I would make such a sacrifice.
So he needed to cut me some slack and give me some time to figure things out. I knew that I couldn’t force him to see things my way, but I hoped that he would be empathetic about it. And until I could get it sorted out, we would have to do our best to try and appear to be inconspicuous to the people in town and my old friends from school. Which justifies my going out tonight at least in my mind.
Unlawfully taken from Royal Road, this story should be reported if seen on Amazon.
With that reminder I could almost taste Caleb’s frustration bubbling up within him, causing him to grumble under his breath. With a dramatic flourish, he threw his hands up in the air, his exasperation evident and yet a tad bit entertaining for a fraction of a second.
But suddenly a surge of anger radiated through me, and I couldn’t help but respond curtly. “You know what? I am tired of this shit,” I retorted, my voice laced with defiance. “You have no clue about what you’re doing no more than I do and you’re the one who should know how it works— you used it all the time, I’ve only used it twice. So why do you expect me to figure it out? Because you think my mother was a witch from Ella. Well, I declare that I am human, I know for a fact my father was human so from now on, I choose to embrace my humanity. And human girls go out with their friends on a Friday night, so that is what I chose to do tonight, so move.” I said grabbing at the handle and he pushed his hand at the door again to re-close it.
“You’re no more human than I am.” The words stung like a whip biting at my skin. I knew he was right, but I didn’t want to give him the satisfaction of knowing it.
“Your father was human, I do not doubt that, but that doesn’t make you human. Deny it all you want but you know your mother was a witch. So that makes you more like me than not. A half-breed that belongs nowhere.”
I felt a lump form in my throat as I tried to swallow down the bitter truth. He was being cruel but he was also right. I was a half-breed, caught between two worlds and belonging to neither. It had already become a lonely existence.
Caleb let go of the door that I was no longer pulling on and added, “But if we were trying to tip a scale to decide where either of us belongs, I promise you we would not be heavy on this side,” he continued. “We must go back.”
“I will get you home,” I said, trying to ease out of the conversation with a little submission, I hated that I was retreating but his words hurt and I had no other rebuttal.
He Looked out the window of the kitchen door, “Your ride is here.”
“It’s safer to pretend and do normal stuff and keep the eyes off of us from the people in town.” I offered.
Caleb retorted, “That is such a shitty excuse to go out and party with your friends that I have ever heard. And you keep insisting that I’m the one full of shit and immature," Caleb scoffed before adding, "you shouldn't be doing this.”
“You’re wrong, Caleb,” I said, my voice filled with frustration. “I should be doing this. I’ve already lost six years of my life, and it’s incredibly unfair of you to keep judging me. If you ever loved me, you would want what is best for me.”
I took a deep breath, gathering my thoughts before continuing not wanting to give him a chance to counter. “Returning to Ella would mean I would have to marry a man three times my age, who already has eleven children and two dead wives, both of whom died while giving birth, I do not wish to be his next brooding mare, that is beyond the call of duty and honor to my host family, don’t you think?” I asked rhetorically, my voice laced with rage the more I expressed my pent-up secrets.
I knew Galvan had only wanted to ensure my well-being as he got older and his own children married and left home to start their own families. Knowing their family values, which was why I hadn’t refused The Promising he had arranged for me. So Caleb had to be out of his mind to think that any part of me wanted to go back and live that horror of life when I could stay here and be free.
“You’re bat shit crazy if you think I’m going to do that,” I said, shaking my head in disbelief when he had nothing to say at my confession as to why I fled Ella to begin with.
“I’ll get you home, don’t worry about that. But I will not be staying if I can help it. So stop calling me selfish, stop telling me what I want doesn’t matter. You’re not facing the same battles as me.”
His words, though well-intentioned, did little to ease the turmoil swirling within me. “All you have to do is reject the offer. The Ella people’s traditions are not so finite. A woman may choose to live independently in The Barrio, you know that.”
I couldn’t help but scoff at his attempt to pacify my troubled mind. How could he possibly understand the weight of my decision? “And you know,” I retorted, my voice tinged with frustration, even if it is “okay,” to do so would be an insult to my host father.”
I took a deep breath and turned the door handle. The wooden frame felt cool against my fingertips as I leaned into it for strength. Surprisingly, he didn’t try to stop me. Perhaps he knew that I needed to get away from him, to escape the suffocating atmosphere of our never-ending war of words.
I stepped outside and the fresh air hit me like a crisp fragrant wave, offering a much-needed respite from the polluted tension of the kitchen. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, letting the cool breeze wash over me and I tried to ground myself though I was several feet away from the dirt of my backyard. My moment of peace and gathering was short-lived.
Caleb's voice sliced through the silence, his words heavy with raw emotion. "Do I mean absolutely nothing to you? Are you willing to live your life here, knowing there's a good chance we'll never cross paths again?" His sudden vulnerability caught me off guard, causing my heart to race as I searched for the right words. Without hesitation, I blurted out the first thing that came to mind. "You mean everything to me. But it breaks my heart to know that I mean so little to you. That you would be fine with me marrying another man just so you can move on with your life. You're returning to Nistra, probably to wed some beautiful princess after completing your Trials and be given a castle to raise your children in, or what dumb bullshit royals do in your world. I'll never see you again anyway, so why does it even matter?" My words hung in the air like a weight on my chest, the weight of baring my heart to him once again. But it was too late to retract them now so I just swallowed hard and straightened my back to appear stronger than I was.
"Happy Birthday, Elizabeth," Caleb whispered, his gaze fixed on the road as a vibrant green jeep came into view. He stepped aside, hiding himself from sight yet close enough for me to still see he was there. The throbbing music drowned out any other words he might have uttered as they drew nearer, I turned my back on him.
All I yearned for was a night of solitary, a moment to reflect on my past and cast off the madness that had consumed my existence for over half a decade. I had to leave now before I laid eyes on Caleb again and remembered how much I was still in love with him, because my old self wanted nothing more than to surrender to him, to make the sadness and disappointment in his eyes fade away.
This was my last chance to break free, once and for all, and I had to seize it.
"I hope it's everything you've ever dreamed of," Caleb added, a tinge of sadness lacing his voice. His words weighed on me like a sinuous serpent slithering across the wooden floor, seeking to constrict my very being.
I ran down the five steps, I intentionally skipped the last one, a fleeting fear lingering in my mind that I might be forcefully pulled back into the house at any moment, trapped once more. It was an irrational thought; Caleb would never stoop to such actions despite his erratic behavior of late. Even in his anger and frustration, he remained my dearest friend and would never hurt me.
No, it was my own lack of trust in my ability to resist the allure of retreating to the safety of the house and reverting back to old habits of submissiveness towards him that I feared most. That part of me longed for nothing more than to have him look at me with the same adoration as before. So, I compelled myself to run as swiftly as possible towards my new future, leaving that naive, young child behind me.
Dana's Jeep screeched to a halt before me, the bumper near checking my hip as I inhaled a breath filled with dusty soil, bracing for the impact that mercifully never came. The sight of my closest girlfriend's radiant smile served as all the reassurance I needed. Leaning out of the window, she exclaimed with exhilaration, "Get in, bitch! It's time to celebrate!"
Eighteen and finally free!