Something is pressing down on me, like a soft thing. Soft and kind of scratchy. I reach out my tongue and taste it and it’s rough and bumpy and doesn’t taste like anything really. I push my tongue up harder, and this thing has a give to it. I realize I can move my arms and whatever is on me isn’t too heavy. Light and cottony. I try to raise my arms up and they go up easy and I’m not covered in dirt because I know what dirt tastes like. I raise up my knees and they go up easy too and now my arms and legs are both up and I’m kicking and floundering and panicked because I don’t want to meet that man, that man with a pink hole in his face.

I kick out all the way and jackhammer everywhere and I fall off of something. At first I think it’s going to be a cliff and that man did something to me, maybe put me at the edge of a cliff to watch me fall off or something. Something wicked and sneaky to make him laugh, but I fall only a few feet down and hit something soft.

I roll all around and what’s on me is a blanket and what I fell onto was the floor and I’m inside my place again and in my bedroom.

When did I get in here? I thought I was in tire, taking a good ‘ol snooze. I thought I was hiding inside a trap door inside a sneaky shed in the middle of an empty lot with a monster just above me, getting ready to sniff me out. Getting ready to sniff me on out and reach in after me to grab me for something. I guess I wandered in my house and fell asleep after all. That’s what I wanted anyway and I guess this is okay enough.

I shake my head to get the sleep gel out of my head and I pick up the blanket and shuffle it back onto the bed. So it’ll look nice. I like things to look nice. I walk into my living room and the curtains are close now. Should I look? Is that the best thing for me to do right now? I pace the living room. Maybe I should have a snack. maybe I should have a drink of water. Should I take those pills? Probably not. They’ll make me all drowsy again and I’m not too comfortable with the thought of waking up in all sorts of places, covered in things which may or may not be dirt, or trap doors, or blankets. I don’t want to have to taste things with my tongue to tell where I am in the world.

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I walk to the window and grab ahold of one of the curtains with my pinching fingers. A little look wouldn’t hurt, would it? I put my hand back down and pace some more. Then I get a spicy feeling and run to the door. It’s unlocked. I double lock it. I triple lock it. I put a stool in front of it and put an empty can on the stool so I can hear if someone comes in. They’ll knock the can over and I’ll hear it. Like in those secret agent movies. Can’t catch me unawares.

I stare at the window curtains, slyly though. They don’t need to know what I’m thinking. From across the room I put my fingers up to my eye and pretend to pinch the edge of the curtain. Maybe I can open it from here, just in case someone has their big head right up against the window, waiting for those curtains to open up. Nobody watches me.

I need to take my mind off this. I walk over and switch on the TV. It’s on the channel I always have it on, only I haven’t watched this channel at this time. I think. I look over and the clock on my microwave says 9:42. I think that means 9:42 in the morning since I can see some light coming from outside, but that could just be some bright lights and it could be all the way back into the night time and maybe I slept for a whole turn of the sun instead of just a half of our, or however that works.

I don’t trust it.

I have to look out that window. I shouldn’t though. I turn back to the TV and there’s a show on about turtles and how they’re pretty fast in the water, but are God awful slow on the ground and this guy was making them little cars so they could escape predators faster on the land. I peer at the curtain from the side of my eye. The show goes to commercial and I stand up and pretend that I’m going to go to the kitchen to get a snack. For the curtain’s benefit.

”Boy oh boy, I could sure use a snack.” I say, loudly “I’m just going to go over here to the kitchen and open up the fridge and see what’s inside here. MAYBE I”LL HAVE SOME CHEESE TO GO WITH WATCHING THIS SHOW ON THE TV.” I shout. The curtain twitches. That can’t happen. Curtains don’t twitch by themselves, do they? I haven’t see it happen yet, but I guess that doesn’t mean they can’t... does it?

I wipe my hand on my face and I look at my hand and it’s sweaty. When did I start sweating? There’s music blaring now from the TV and the show is back on. I sidle back over to watch, keeping my eye close on the curtain.