My legs blur over the laptop keys as I type my newest chapter furiously.

(WARNING! Your writing has become highly toxic to read. Invest in Quality NOW.)

You can't tell me what to do!

My newest chapter drops and I eagerly flick to the link, button-mashing F5 so I can see everyone who's reading it.

If you stumble upon this narrative on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen from Royal Road. Please report it.

'And another 0 (0 invisible) member(s) and 0 guest(s)'

I wait an amazing five seconds before hitting refresh again.

It hasn't changed.

Four minutes and two hundred twenty six refreshes later, no one has read my new chapter, and it falls off the Recently Updated list.

I bang my head on the laptop in irritation.

(NOTICE: Your writing has literally and literarily murdered someone. Your account has been suspended until further notice.)

...Oh, that's what that's for!

Can I have my account back yet?

*F5*

*F5*

*F5*

Do what I want you to do!

*F5*...