Chapter 11 Supply and Demand

Autumnus and Hafoc headed out to visit the butcher first. They followed Underground Lou's directions to the butcher, which was written on yet another napkin. The town was peaceful and quiet. They were the only two walking outside for most of the time they searched for the shop.

After taking a few winding turns down various streets in Svlandir's business district, they came upon a storefront with a sign that had a painting of a large pig on a spit. Blood poured from its side into a bucket that read, "It's that fresh!" Strangely, the skewered pig depicted in the scene smiled in endorsement. Autumnus’ stomach turned at the sight. This must be the place. He nodded to Hafoc and they strode in.

For a man surrounded by chopped up animal body parts, Autumnus found the butcher was oddly cheerful. He greeted them when they came in with a "Ho there! What can I do you for today?"

Autumnus decided to get straight to the point. The sooner we can leave this…establishment, the better, he figured. ”We’re here for two reasons. Firstly, I’m looking for a barrel of blood.” He pulled out a small notepad and consulted it. “Ah, yes. A barrel of blood—no garlic, please.” He then nodded in Hafoc’s direction. “And we are also here about the boars that have been causing trouble outside of the town."

Hafoc cleared his throat and met the butcher’s chipper greeting with an equal measure of unenthusiasm.. “Yes,…Boars. We heard it is something that needs handling. We can we sell you the meat afterwords.”

“—Or humanely relocate them, of course.” Autumnus interjected. He shot a glance at Hafoc.

The butcher looked at the floor, grimaced and rubbed his chin, frowning. After a moment, he looked up and glared at Autumnus. "No garlic, eh? Who would ask for that? It’s not usually flavored, you know. This blood is for a vampire, isn't it? I only put it in there to give them lot trouble." He spat on the floor in disgust. "Phah!"

He turned away from Autumnus and faced Hafoc. To him, the butcher nodded, "Yes, please, do what you will with those boars. I will make it worth your time. I can pay you in meat and jerky and buy some of your catch if you don't want to live off of boar flesh the rest of your days," he laughed.

Autumnus held up a long, gloved finger and attempted to regain the butcher’s attention. ”I am just making a request, for the blood no garlic.” He crossed his arms. “If that is a trouble, then that's fine. I will get the blood from the boars we hunt for you and cut out the middle man.” Autumnus hadn’t recalled ever trying to bluff before. He hoped the negotiation tactic worked and the butcher would be loathe to lose the business, vampire order, or no.

The butcher crossed his arms as well. "Hmph. I don't know how I feel about working with a vampire lover. Where do you suppose you'll get a barrel for all that blood then?"

Out of the corner of his eye, Autumnus saw Hafoc drag one hand down his face. He thought he heard a muffled groan as well.

The butcher rubbed his chin again, considering. “We-ell, you all are obviously not from here. And you want to fix the boar problem, so I reckon you aren’t all bad.” He nodded to Hafoc. “I’ll tell you what—you get rid of those pests first, and we can talk blood later.”

Next, Autumnus and Hafoc headed to the green grocer next door, and stuck up a conversation with her, hoping to make a good impression.

When they opened the shop door, a bell tinkled to announce their arrival. A plump, rosy-faced woman in a white bonnet greeted Hafoc and Autumnus with open arms. "Welcome, my boys! What can I do you for?” Her smile was wide, but Autumnus noticed she kept her distance from him and stood closer to Hafoc, who bowed and brought up the topic of troublesome boars.

When Hafoc finished, she shook her head, tsk-ing. "Oh, yes, dearies," she said, and wiped her hands on her white apron. “They ARE a menace. But I hate to think of the poor things being hurt...after all, they've just been displaced from their home, I suppose.” She sighed, and foisted a fat peach into Hafoc’s hand. "What did you have in mind, love?”

Autumnus brightened. ”I so agree! No need to harm the poor beasts! If we can find out what is causing them to come to the city, we can get them to move somewhere else."

Hafoc, mouth full of peach, nodded and shrugged as he finished the peach. Juice dribbled down his chin.

The grocer put her hands in her hips. She continued talking to Hafoc. “Well, if you can manage to move them without hurting them, I'd be willing to give you something for your trouble. I can give you 20 gold with some fruit, I suppose. You have to ask the other locals to chip in, if you want more."

Autumnus left the store and waited outside as Hafoc continued to eat fruit, flatter the grocer and haggle. Up the street, he saw an angry-looking Kylia stomping in his direction. A few paces back, Lou strode behind her, strumming his lute as he walked.

Ensure your favorite authors get the support they deserve. Read this novel on Royal Road.

As they could get closer, heard Kylia yell over her shoulder at Lou. “Get lost!”

Lou winked and bowed gracefully. "Is that really your wish, m'lady? I'd hate to let such a lovely vision escape my sight…"

Kylia stopped, clenched her fists and turned around to face Lou. “Will you give it a rest, you—“ She tilted her head, eyes fixed on Lou’s chest, and pointed at the folded handkerchief in his pocket. “Hey, is that…?”

Autumnus recognized it now; the pocket square was the same pattern as the underwear Lou had stolen at breakfast. Maybe it would be better to wait inside the store after all, he thought.

Kylia lunged for Lou, “Give that back, you pig!”

Lou ducked out of the way. “I will if you let me swine you and dine you, my battalion of beauty!”

Lou dodged her grasp, ran from Kylia and ducked behind Autumnus.

“Lou,” Kylia reached for her dagger. “If you really love me, you’ll let me kill you.”

Lou peeked around Autumnus’ arm. “Oh, come on, you wouldn’t risk hurting our big, cuddly demon friend, would you?” He poked Autumnus in the ribs. “Smile for the lady, would you?”

Autumnus smiled, and lit a flame in his hand.

Lou slapped the Aamonwelp’s shoulder and cheered. “Thank you, buddy—I just knew I could count on you!” Still behind Autumnus, he pointed at Kylia. “Looks like we’ll have to set a date for you to kill me another day, my sweet.”

Autumnus turned to face Lou and stepped back next to Kylia, palm still ablaze. “Ok, if she agrees, of course,” he said. “But today, please hand over the—ahem—handkerchief.”

Lou looked at Autumnus and Kylia with wide eyes and put a hand to his chest over his pocket. “And part with this treasure? That would be like relinquishing a reliquary that bears traces of a goddess!” He held the other hand out, palm up.

Autumnus stepped back as Kylia, forgetting her dagger, dropped it and tackled Lou instead. She knocked him down and sat on top of him, hands around this throat. The lute jangled as it hit the ground with them.

Lou lugging at her wrists, loosened her grip and smiled. “Oh, good idea. I like this way better than me just holding on to your underwear.”

Kylia hit him and grabbed her underwear from his pocket. “Shut up! I can’t enjoy killing you if you enjoy it, too!” She scrambled up and put distance between them again.

The small bell on the shop door rang and Hafoc stepped out onto the street beside them. He looked uncharacteristically full, happy and a bit sticky.

Lou looked up from onto of the cobblestones where he lay and smiled even more broadly. “How did you get so…juicy? I’m jealous!”

[https://i.imgur.com/U3nbJh5.jpg]

Once they began to walk down the street again, Kylia joined them and walked between Autumnus and Hafoc. Now that she had her underwear back and was able to pummel the offending bard, she seemed content to ignore Lou for now.

Lou stayed close behind the other three, serenading them with songs of financial urgency as they walked. He played a lively tune as he ushered them along in the direction of the next store, singing,

Remember now, my precious, odd and unsavory three…

We won’t want to go boar hunting in the woods at night, will we?

Autumnus shook his head. ”No, that we won't, I’m sure we have other plans once night falls, but for now I can smell bread…How about we talk to the baker next?”

Hafoc shrugged.”Yes, sure. But, let’s hurry along now before it starts getting dark.”

Autumnus led the way into the bakery. Inside, what they saw could only be described as a lamb cake apocalypse. Scores of broken lamb shaped cakes with red jelly filling that oozed out of their crumbled forms were scattered on the countertops everywhere they could see.

The baker wore a traditional chef’s toque and sported a long, yellow mustache. As they entered the storefront, they came upon him mixing a large bowl of batter as if he were battling the dough. When he saw them, he yelled, “Get out! Can't you see I'm busy here?"

Autumnus explained their mission. The baker barely seemed to listen. When Autumnus finished, there was an awkward pause as the baker continued to stir frenetically as if nothing had been said. Autumnus took a step closer and tilted his head to see if he could catch the man’s eye.

Still stirring, the baker responded, "Fine, fine! Just take one gold from my cash register—you there! "He looked at Lou. "You look responsible enough. Just take a one gold, mind you, and leave—I'll pay you to leave! So just leave me alone, thank you very much. Goodbye.” And, with that, he continued baking and turned his back to them, obviously done with the conversation.

Side-eyeing the baker, Autumnus whispered to Kylia, “Is he possessed? Surely no one town needs that many lamb cakes!”

Kylia nodded. “When talking about lamb cakes, I think that ‘need’ is too strong a word.” She rolled her eyes as Hafoc poked at one of the bloody-looking, but otherwise cute, cakes. “I’d be surprised if anyone wanted that many of them, either, though.”

Lou flipped the gold coin from the register. "Haha...No matter...no one in their right mind will want those." He ducked as the baker hurled a rolling pin at his head. He dashed out the door as the baker began yelling at them again. The others were close behind as the door slammed behind them. ”Um...on to the tailor's then?"

Outside, Lou bit the gold coin before putting it in his shirt pocket where Kylia’s underwear used to be. "I say we head to the problem, relocate the boars and then come back to collect from the merchants.”

Autumnus tapped a finger to his chin and looked up as he hought. “I am fine with either way. We do need to take care of these boars before it gets late, however. Unless time is against us, we should head to the boars—but if it's too far to travel now, I’d say we should head to the tailor’s and go back in the morning.”

Hafoc crossed his arms and stopped walking. ”We should at least scout these beasts. Y’know, see the situation for ourselves,” he said.

Autumnus nodded. ”You are most right. Let us go ahead and see these boars for ourselves.”

“Yes,” Lou shrugged. “I’d say we can make it. It’s only midday and the edge of town isn’t that far from here.” He pulled on his goatee. “Come to think of it, the tailor’s a miser, anyway.”

Bolstered by the promise of gold and trade, they headed to the east edge of the town, where a bridge crossed a creek and a road curved into the forest. The road was empty of travelers. They also couldn’t see any boars yet. The forest was fairly dense, and quiet. Oppressively so.

The sky was clear. Autumnus couldn’t feel a storm coming. So why was there no bird song, or any noise from the woods, for that matter? It was unusual. No, unheard of. Autumnus thought to wonder now why the townspeople would but up with animals blocking their trade route, Maybe there was a reason no one else had gotten rid of the boars, he thought. Maybe that’s not the only problem here.