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The Mortal Ingredients
Chapter 97: The Wrong Side of the Bed

Chapter 97: The Wrong Side of the Bed

The alarm went off as planned, instantly waking me from my sleep. I yawned and stretched, but it was more due to routine than actual effects of sleep. How long was I out for? I can’t imagine that no one came to get me after the way our meeting ended.

“... Starlords it feels weird to be in the driver’s seat.” I jarred in my movement for a moment as Three’s voice resounded in my head instead of X’s. I lay back in bed and tried to sort out my thoughts before saying or doing anything.

‘Three,’ I started, ‘why are you talking to me right now? What happened to X? I heard the program sigh in my head, before she responded.

“It might be easier for you to see it with your own eyes than to explain it myself.” Suddenly, a bright red arrow appeared in my vision, leading me out of the room.

I raised my brow, but got up skeptically. Considering I was still in control of my body, I had to assume there had been no attack and that X had left of her own free will, but why?

Was it something I had done in the past? Perhaps she had a grudge over my mismanagement and mistreatment of her when I first came to the world of Ethia?

Whatever it was, I guess time would tell. I made sure I looked fine in the mirror of the room, before making my way to and opening the door. There was a discarded box by the entrance to the room, and a quick search of my memory indicated that it hadn’t been there when I walked in.

“Does this have something to do with it then?” I asked Three, but she didn’t so much as mumble in response.

Taking the silence in stride, I followed the AR arrow down the hall and to the left, which took me to the entrance to Lucina’s room.

“Ok, did she hitch a ride with Lucina then? Is it a permanent thing she wants to change?” I asked Three again, but again, there was no response.

I tried not to curse at the A.I. as I knocked on the large metal door. “Lucina, it’s me. Is X with you? She was gone when I got up, and-”

The door slid open with an audible hiss from the mechanisms that moved it automatically. What greeted me was the sight of a tall, dark-skinned woman with hourglass proportions, and silver hair. Her amber eyes danced playfully up and down my body, and a sultry smile greeted me from just below her angular nose.

She wore a white dress that had a mesh panel, making her cleavage available for anyone interested. While the dress stopped just above her knees, she wore a pair of leggings that squeezed the flesh of her calves, ending in a pair of blue heels.

“Welcome, Master. I was afraid that you wouldn’t make it out of bed without my assistance.”

I did a double take as I realized that the woman in front of me was speaking in X’s deep voice, and I lamely expressed as much with a shakily voiced, “X?”

“At your service, Master!” The woman bowed, a large smile on her perfectly proportioned face.

I looked behind her, only to see an extremely tired looking Princess Lucina. When our eyes met, she gave me a tired smile and walked over to stand behind X.

“I forgot how much of a pain in the ass it is to have a little sister, so thank you for the reminder.” She said, wrapping her arms around X’s neck.

“Let me remind you that I’m the bigger sister.” X said with a pout, while striking a pose that emphasized her proportions.

Lucina rolled her eyes and then looked at me. “So, are you ready to talk now?”

I was still reeling from the revelation that X had finished her physical body and was now a living being, by most definitions of the concept, but I hadn’t forgotten the conversation between Lucina and I in the throne room. It was time to come clean, about everything.

---

Lucina sat on the floor of her room, looking over at X and Joshua interacting with each other. The latter sat on the lap of the former, and although she felt a flare of jealousy pass over her, she squashed it down, reminding herself that in the beginning of Joshua’s stay in Ethia, it was not the royalty who kept him sane, but the sentient program known as Judgment.

An unsettling realization came over her as she became aware that it was also not the Judgment who warped his original personality, but the whims of the crown who believed they could bend this man to their whims.

Lucina then turned to her right and saw her sister, Reya, pouting while looking at the two. Akahime sat next to her with Lilian close by, a confused looking Winter and a stoic-faced Viina Secela to boot.

His entire harem is here. Lucina mused to herself, but she turned back as soon as she noticed that the room had gone quiet. Joshua was about to speak.

“Where to start…” Joshua mused out loud.

X smirked and said, “How about the reason I came to be in my current form? That should take us right from the beginning.”

Joshua sighed, but acquiesced to the robot’s suggestion.

---

“Fine. Back in my world, on earth, I fell in love with a woman who I had been friends with for quite a while, and just when we had agreed to a proper relationship, I was dragged into Ethia without my consent.”

Reya opened her mouth, but I interrupted. “Yes, I know the proper terminology is that I “Fell” into Ethia, but that one word doesn’t do the emotion behind it justice.”

Reya closed her mouth and seemed to pout. “My repressed desires for that woman are what ended up giving X the original shape she had, but as I continued to be a resident in this world, that shape gave way and changed into a version of Lucina with some of that girl’s defining traits.”

Winter looked at the robotic body of X and muttered, “Not enough defining traits.” Which actually got a chuckle from the people not named Lucina.

I shook my head and continued. “Regardless, that is how X came to be, and the reason she has the body you see before you. Next, I suppose I’ll explain what X is. Several of you are former owners, and the rest of you are aware of the existence of the Judgment Programs.”

There were a smattering of nods from the people in the room, and no looks of confusion anywhere, so I continued. “Everyone who has been a Judgment user gets a message warning them about other Judgment users, and a vague message about the “Trials of Damocles.” Would those who have owned Judgments say this is true?”

This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.

Once again there were more nods, and Reya impatiently said, “Joshua, can you maybe skip to the new information? I’m sure you could supplement those who aren’t as knowledgeable, right?”

I sighed, and contemplated whether or not to tell her this was being recorded, but ultimately decided against it. In turn, I ended up ignoring her, which seemed like the right move given there was no verbal rebuttal afterwards. “X, are we completely protected from any wiretapping at the moment?”

The A.I. looked around the room, and then snapped her fingers. “We are now, Master.” She replied.

I nodded, and finally bore the information I had received from Starlord Alexstasia Bloodcrown. “The Trials of Damocles are actually a test designed to select the most capable person on the planet, and have them challenge the hierarchy of the universe.”

The people around me just stared at my face, as if I had sprouted a third eye. “I realize it’s hard to believe, but its information I got from-”

Out of nowhere, a fiery hot pain erupted on my temple. I groaned in agony, causing the people around me to instantly come to my side and check if I was OK. “Tsk, tsk.” Starlord Bloodcrown’s voice echoed in my head. “You should know that such information is classified, Paladin Cole. Think carefully about what you can and can’t share.”

Just as it had come, the pain vanished without warning, leaving me feeling a phantom pain on my forehead. Once I regained control of my senses, i realized that people were talking to me.

“Are you alright?”

“What happened?”

“Is everything OK?”

Sentiments along those lines registered in my head, but who said them was something my brain couldn’t process at that moment.

“I’m fine.” I said to no one in particular. “I just overstepped the bounds of what I was allowed to say. Let me try once more.”

I got everyone to sit back down how they were before, and collected myself in order to speak. “Ok. Let’s just say that I got that information from a very reliable source. Now, the reason they’re so vague about it in the beginning is that you’re meant to go against these other Judgment users, and in turn, learn more about the goal of these trials by absorbing more programs into your own.”

There were nods from the previous Judgment users who had their programs taken by me to corroborate that statement. Meanwhile, those who hadn’t had any contact with the programs found themselves having a better understanding of our circumstances.

“Honestly, I don’t know how anyone outside of royalty is supposed to be able to participate in this trial. There’s an incredible amount of wealth needed in order to travel the globe to search for these users, not to mention accommodations and living expenses. I got incredibly lucky receiving the title I did, but thanks to that I am now one of the semifinalists in the Trial.”

“Wait, you collected five Judgments?” Winter asked, stunned. I nodded, and called out the projected forms of the Judgments I had collected so far.

“We have X, first off.” I said, pointing to the busty woman that my A.I. had chosen to inhabit. She smiled and waved back. “I’m sure all of you have had an encounter with her at one point or another.”

Again, a collection of nods from the audience reinforced my point. “She was my first Judgment, the one I received when I fell into Ethia. As for how she came to possess a body… even I don’t know. I do have my suspicions, although we’ll have a chat about it in the near future.”

X gave me a winning smile but I scoffed, and snapped my fingers, causing Three to appear. The Judgment was wearing baggy clothes, as usual, but her usual mask was pulled down, revealing a perfect copy of Lilian’s face. “Next would be Three. She’s originally the Judgment of Lilian over there, and I acquired her alongside Lilian and Akahime during my trip to the Luong Empire’s capital, Asahi.”

“Don’t make me sound like a prize that you won!” Lilain complained while Akahime only showed a demure smile in response.

“Why is she Three?” Lucina asked in confusion. “And why is X named that? Surely she could have had a proper name, right?”

“There is a reason for that.” I explained. “Each Judgment program comes with an included serial number to indicate the order in which they were created. Our planet of Ethia has ten of these programs, and I chose to name them accordingly. For example, X is the last of the ten, so I named her after the roman numeral for 10.”

“What’s a roman numeral?” Lilian asked.

Akahime opened her mouth and responded, “It’s a metric of counting from the ancient world, about two thousand years ago.”

“Three is the third in the series, so Three.” I continued. Seeing the look that Lilian gave me, I felt the need to include, “Well, I could have put more effort into it, but the name was meant to be a punishment for something that Lilian and Three attempted to do to me.”

The former gang leader rolled her eyes, as did Three. I snapped my fingers again, and this time, the tall, dark, and handsome Un appeared, wearing combat fatigues.” Next is Un. He is actually someone who came to my side without any violent battle, and joined at the same time that his granddaughter, Winter did.”

Winter nodded in affirmation, as Un flashed her a smile. “What he forgot to mention,” Un spoke in his deep, baritone voice, “is that I am both number one in the Judgment series, and a fragment of the personality of the original founder of the Strafe family. I’ve been passed down as a program from generation to generation of Strafe family leaders, which, due to our penchant for getting ourselves into trouble, has left me with ten owners in seventy-ish years.”

Winter looked down at all the attention she was receiving, an act which grew even more uncomfortable once Un uttered the following: She is legitimately my precious granddaughter, so I would appreciate it if you could all continue taking care of her. Especially you, Paladin.”

Winter’s dark skin blushed furiously and Un winked out of existence with a cackle. “Now you see what kind of relationship they have.” I said with a slight smirk, enjoying the embarrassment of my head of security.

“Next, Cin.” I snapped once more, and a blue orb with wings appeared in front of us all. “Forgive me for only showing this form to my Master and his party.”

My jaw dropped as I hadn’t heard Cin utter anything more than a few strung together thoughts since his inception as one of my programs. Meanwhile, he continued, “My true form is that of an angel, however, it’s massive size would dwarf everything in this room. Thus, I am now this adorable looking ball you see before you.”

I opened my mouth once, closed it, and opened it again to speak. “Cin is number five in the series, and his original owner is no longer with us, as any of you who watched the war game may know.”

The orb disappeared, leaving Viina Secela, former princess and daughter of the prior People’s King to stare at the space it occupied, obviously waiting for her father. Unfortunately for her, he was still an egg, but I would explain it anyway. I snapped again and opened my mouth to speak when a shrill voice that vaguely reminded me of Dax from Jak and Daxter spoke up.

“Good Starlords above! You say one wrong thing to one broad and you…” The red cherub trailed off after realizing he had an audience, and by the way X’s gaze turned venomous, it turned out that the ‘broad’ in question was present too.

“Dad?” Viina spoke quietly. She reached a hand out, but was quickly pulled in by X, who hugged her from behind.

“I’m sorry Viina, but your father’s data was corrupted, almost beyond recognition. I did manage to salvage some of his files, but I’ll show them to you at a later time.”

Viina’s lip began to quiver, but she nodded reluctantly. Meanwhile, I gave X the kind of look she had given the red Judgment, and she smiled at me unfalteringly. “Well, I honestly have no idea what his number or name is, so I guess we’ll just do this now.”

“Ooh, It’s like a gender reveal, I’m so excited!” The cherub smiled. The rest of the room seemed off put, and I nodded meaninglessly.

“Ok, so what is your number?” The cherub clapped twice, and red trumpets appeared above him, playing a sort of medieval tune.

“I am the eighth in the Judgment series, at your service.” I nodded and tried to think of a name for the number eight, but Akahime beat me to it.

“How about Hachi?” she said. “It’s old Japanese for the number eight, but also for the word bee, which he kind of looks like.”

“Hey!” The cherub interrupted. “I take offense to that! Would a bee have wings this gorgeous?” The baby flexed it’s scarlet wings in triumph.

Unfortunately, that quickly turned into a sad wilt as I said, “Hachi it is then. With that, we have five of the ten Judgments, and have moved onto the next part of the Trials. I’ll be waiting to hear back from my source as soon as another person has collected five Judgments.”

The rest of the room nodded, and Lilian quickly excused himself, leaving the rest of us in a room with an abundance of tension. Finally, I broke the silence and said, “Ok, here it is. If you have any questions, concerns, or comments, let me hear them now, or forever hold your peace.”