I have severely underestimated his determination. It was going on month six of him aggressively caring for me. Except he was a lot less aggressive about it now.

Now instead of forcing me into the bath every day and forcing me to eat, he used gentle encouragements. Like promising lots of hugs, and giving me pieces of my favorite food. Or that after playing in the snow with the monkeys we could have a nap. Or telling me he’d help me brush my fur out after bathing.

I’d never seen snow before. The area I lived in my old world was just too warm for it, and what areas did get snow, it vanished quickly under the burning sun. It was interesting.

There were also creatures called butterflies that landed on the island as a part of a yearly migration. They blanketed the trees, and all the monkeys played with them.

Wukong eventually moved into my room, after he realized I had nightmares. He would wake me up whenever I had one. It helped me get more sleep, and I was no longer constantly reminded of everything I lost. Eventually, I just decided to use his bed instead of mine. His snoring and warmth comforted me, reminding me I wasn’t alone. It helped prevent the nightmares altogether.

It was all little things. But they added up.

I was staring out the window. It was rainy outside today. Wukong was still asleep, snoring beside me.

Why? I did my best to ignore him. Well, I had days where the warm sun managed to tempt me out of bed to play, and he didn’t have to push me to eat and drink. Days where I could appreciate the warm sun, and his jokes brought a smile to my face.

But I had more days where all I did was lie around. Where the weight of everything crushed me and I felt like I’d never be able to rise again.

He stuck by me on those days too. He just laid with me, and occasionally tried to give me water and food.

Today didn’t feel like either of those days. Today, I felt caught in the middle. I wanted to get up, to see everyone and play some games.

But the grief crushed me. And something else too.

I was so scared. I was starting to care. For this world. For this kingdom.

For him.

And that terrified me.

Wukong was waking up. He shifted and sleepily looked at me and sighed. “It’s going to be a bad day isn’t it? That’s okay. We can just lay here for a while.”

He pulled me onto his chest and started purring. Why did I tell him I liked his purring?

Well, because I did. It’s thick rumbling vibrated throughout the room. It was like a massage chair I could lay on.

I was liking more and more things.

“Wukong, stop.”

The purring came to an end. “Not in the mood for some purring? What would you like then?”

“Leave me alone.”

He sighed. “No. I’m not going to do that.”

“I can’t do this Wukong. It hurts too much. I’ll just lose it all again.”

He was quiet, but continued playing with my fur. It was a few minutes before he spoke again. “I can’t even fathom what you’ve been through Yue. Losing not just your family, but your entire world. Everything. But I know you can be happy. I’ve seen it when the butterflies came through, and how you first smiled when you saw snow. You can be happy here, despite your past.”

“I can’t do this Wukong. I can’t care again. I’ll just lose everything. It hurts too much.”

He continued petting me. He didn’t say anything. He just held me as the tears began slipping down my face.

“I don’t want to try. Just let me go. It’s too scary.”

“I can’t make you want to live again Yue. All I can do is try to make your life worth living. All I know is I can’t let you go. I’ll never be able to let you go. So I’m sorry, but no.”

“What do you want from me? I don’t have anything left to give.”

He sighed. “Well, this right now is nice. Just keep talking to me. You can tell me about your homeworld, about the end, about your nightmares, about the snow, or anything else you want to talk about. Just don’t shut everything out. Don’t shut me out.”

We stayed quiet for a while again. After the death of my world, and being trapped in the in-between by Lady Ethereal, I thought I only had one option. Then Wukong came along, and despite his mistakes and crude methods, it felt like he gave me another.

A hard choice. The difficult one. One where I’d struggle, and get hurt, and keep carrying the memory of what I lost, knowing I could never have it again.

But I could have new things. Snow. Butterflies. Monkeys who always told me how happy they were to see me.

And Wukong.

I sniffed, and wiped my eyes. I made the hard decision. “Okay Wukong. I’ll try.”

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He stared at me, dumbfounded before he stood up and twirled me in the air, the biggest smile I’ve ever seen on his face. “You will? That’s incredible! We have to tell everyone! Wait, let’s throw a party to celebrate! I’ll get Beng and—”

“Whoa! Wukong!” I snapped him out of it.

He set me down. “Sorry, did I scare you? Are you alright?”

I smiled despite myself. “I’m fine. I just don’t want a party or anything. Can we just stay here for a little longer? I want to take it easy today.”

He nodded. “Of course! Anything you want. Do you want to listen to my purring more?”

“Yeah, that sounds nice.”

We laid back down, and I cuddled up to his chest as he started purring again. Yes, this was nice. Just me and him.

As long as I had him, I knew I’d be okay

I didn’t get better right away. I still had bad days. Days when I felt too heavy to get out of bed. But once I started putting the effort in again, the good days began to outnumber the bad.

Wukong stayed with me the whole time. I encouraged him to start doing his own thing and visit his friends, but he still spent most days right by my side.

Winter came to an end, and spring arrived, and with it, babies. Monkeys of all kinds had lots of children. I frequently went out and about the island and helped heal babies that had fallen ill, or were born unhealthy.

Word spread fast, and soon sick monkeys of all kinds were coming to see me. While I had their attention, I usually gave them a basic lesson on chi manipulation. Some even had a talent for it.

Early summer was quick to arrive too, and with it, the end of my first year on Shijie.

“No, not over there, over there by the other door.” Wukong suggested we throw a party to celebrate, and I agreed on the stipulation that I planned it.

I recruited some monkeys to make some floral decorations and potted some small flowering trees that I recruited General Ma to move.

He heaved up the flower pot and set it beside the door. Perfect. There were strings of flowers, flower crowns, flower rings, and floral centerpieces. I didn’t have a lot of options for decorations on this island. Wukong volunteered to steal some party supplies, but I told him he had no eye for décor and to handle collecting the food.

“That’s perfect Ma. Thank you. Tell Wukong I’m ready for him to bring the food in. He promised to get something good while hunting.”

Ma grunted. He wasn’t the most vocal of monkeys. He trotted out the door.

I fussed with the centerpieces, nervous. I wanted everything to be perfect. It was the first time I’ve ever planned a party. I wanted everyone to have fun.

I had room for games, some musical instruments Wukong stole for me, a place to dance. And wine. It wouldn’t be a party without wine.

There was a large crash outside. I ran over to the door, terrified one of my potted trees had fallen over.

No, but a bit of the ceiling did. Wukong was cursing as he tried to drag a giant boar that could barely fit down the hallway.

I smacked my face. Was he really going to try and drag that whole thing into the banquet hall? Sometimes he had more strength than sense.

“Wukong!” I waved to get his attention. He noticed and hopped down off the boar.

“Well? Pretty impressive right? This should be enough to feed everyone for the night.”

I gave him a smile. “Yes, you did a very good job. But, um, I don’t think it will fit very well through the doors. Right?”

“Ah.” He looked at the much smaller doors. “I suppose not. Oh! I’ll just make them bigger!”

He pulled his staff out of his ear. I jumped in front of him, hands held wide. “No! No, instead, what if we dismantled the boar here, and bring the meat we’ll eat through to the kitchen. That way we don’t have to break more of the palace.”

“Oh! Good idea! Monkeys!” Wukong began organizing the monkeys to skin and butcher the boar. I’d have to organize them later to clean up all the blood and guts that were going to be all over the floor.

Later. I walked back into the palace to the kitchens. Some simple fruit dishes lined the counters, and the monkeys occasionally popped one into their mouths as they created more. I left General Liu in charge of the kitchens, and he kept the monkeys on task.

“Liu, Wukong caught a big boar. The meat will be coming in soon.”

He nodded. “You heard her, start the fires in the ovens! Get the honey glaze warmed up! We’ll be roasting soon!”

All the monkey’s cheered and started the preparations. Everything seemed well in hand in here at least.

Just one last thing to check. I went back to the banquet hall, where Beng was trying to corral the musicians.

“Now remember. You all play together! It’s not a competition!”

The monkeys all nodded and began playing. It was rough. Really rough. But I could somewhat pick out a melody among the madness. I could hardly expect them to be experts when they only started practicing a week and a half ago. It would do for now. Hopefully they’d be better for the next banquet.

“Beng! The meat will be ready soon! That means the guests can start coming in!”

He nodded and shouted at some monkeys playing off to the side. “You two! Go tell everyone outside they can start coming in!”

They ran off towards the entrance of the cave and I followed them. Ah, it looked like Wukong had gotten the guts and the carcass out. I grabbed the attention of a few monkeys by waving at them.

“Go grab a few jars and fill them with water. Then spill the water on the floor to wash away the blood.”

They nodded and ran off.

Finally, everything was ready.

I headed into the banquet hall, and sat down. The first few monkeys were coming in and oohing at the decorations. Meat and the fruit dishes began coming out of the kitchen too. And the musicians started again.

It was rough. Very rough. But it was better. Much like my first year here.

Wukong came out of the kitchen and saw me sitting next to his throne. He smiled then bounded over.

“Hello princess. Are we ready to get this party started?”

“Almost. Let’s get a few more guests in and I’ll make a toast.”

“I can see why you wanted to plan. Everything looks great. But you realize these decorations are going to get absolutely wrecked when the monkeys start drinking right?”

I shrugged. “Yeah. They’re just flowers. The important thing is to try and cover up the smell of wine, because it’s also going to get everywhere tonight.”

He laughed, and I smiled and looked back over the crowd. It was about time, before the monkeys got too distracted by food.

I poured wine from my cup, and lifted it up and shouted out to the crowd.

“Everyone! I’d like to make a toast!”

The monkeys paused in their merrymaking to listen to me. The band abruptly stopped and the monkey’s in the kitchen poked their heads out.

“This celebration marks the end of my first year here with you all. It may have had a rough start, and I mean a really rough start, but now as I look back, I smile. Spending time with everyone here has helped me rebuild my life, and I finally feel like I’m moving forward again. So raise your cups! To a better year than the one before! And let’s PARTY!”

I threw my wine back and drank it all down in one gulp. The monkeys went wild and most of them did the same.

Then the monkey’s did what they do best. They descended into absolute madness. Dishes were devoured, flowers were strewn about, and more wine was spilled than drank. I sat back down, happily watching it all as I poured another cup.

Wukong had an entire jug of wine for my toast, and was just now polishing it off.

“Ah! That was good. Did I miss anything?”

I gestured at the chaos. “Just the usual.”

“Heh, I think I’m going to join in. It looks like they’re playing a drinking game over in the corner. What about you?”

“I’m going to sit here another second. Save me a spot though.”

“Always!”

He ran off to join in and I enjoyed the sight of partying monkeys for another minute or two.

If the me who first arrived in this world saw me now, she might not believe it. But this world, and these people had a way of growing on you. I pushed up out of the chair. Time for that drinking game.