I don't know how long I've been staring blankly at the ceiling of my bedroom, hugging my pillows in the fetal position.

My tears have long dried, but my eyes are still burning. The day started with a bright sun, but now it has become cloudy and prone to rain, not unlike my day itself.

I suddenly feel like taking a walk. My parents weren't there as I crossed the kitchen and the living room, which is good.

As I set myself to wander aimlessly, a fine rain started to fall. I simply pull up my hoodie and ignore it as I move forward. I could use the refreshments actually.

I allow the rain to wash away my anger and sadness, as I roam the streets in search of meaning, in search of comfort.

I pass by crazy-eyed Bob, but he is turned to the corner, babbling some crazy shit. I pay him no mind. I don't have the disposition to be kind to beggars right now.

I sit down by a bench in the park as the rain subdues a bit. I proceed to lie and sit miserably until a voice brings me up.

- Sarah? What are you, like, doing here by yourself? - Says Samuel's voice.

No fucking way. It's almost like he's always been conveniently there for me when things have been going to shit lately. It's almost too good to believe.

I stood my head up slowly, scared I was just imagining things. But no, he was in fact there, atop a bicycle, his typical crooked smile on his face.

- Hi... - I say, resigned - Just had a huge fight with my parents. I told them some heavy shit I thought I wanted to say, but it didn't feel that good in the end.

His smile falls into shock for a moment.

- Oh. - he says, then proceeds to sit beside me - that kind of sucks.

- It was long due, to be honest.

He wraps one arm around me and brings me closer. I rest my head on his chest in silence. This already makes me feel better by itself.

I raise my head, and turn to him:

- Can I ask you something? - I say, and he nods - why do you think that we must suffer so much? Why must everything always be so hard to deal with when humans are involved? Why would god allow it?

He reflects for a second, trying to connect his two remaining brain cells.

- Uh... I guess we are meant to suffer, you know? Or something.

I spent some time reflecting on his unexpectedly witty answer.

- Yeah... that sucks. - I say after a pause - I kind of wish we didn't.

- Uhm. Grandma says nothing good ever comes without suffering. And maybe that's true. I mean, working out is painful as shit, but look - he pulls back his sleeves to show an ever so slightly muscular biceps - it pays off.

I just can't help but stare blankly, holding up a laugh. Well, at least he is trying to make me feel better.

- Thank you for coping with my crazy shit. - I tell him - You could do much better than picking up girls like me.

- No, don't say that. You're my girlfriend, and I'm glad for that.

I lean backward from him in shock:

- Hold up, your what now?

- My girlfriend? You know? - he says, confused.

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- You never said anything about wanting me as your girlfriend.

- Oh crap, I had to say it?! - he says, desperation on his face - Shit, I thought we already were. I'm glad you told me!

I stare blankly at his stupid face.

- Dude, of course, you have to say it! How was I supposed to know?! - I say, genuinely angry now.

- Well, I don't know, I just... I don't know. You know?

Jesus, I just can't get angry at this dude. It's physically impossible, he is too pure. I burst into laughter, burying my face in his chest while I do so.

- You're an idiot. - I say with tears of joy rolling down my cheeks.

- Uh... Yeah, fair enough. - he answers, not a shame in the world - wait... does that mean you accept me as your girlfriend? OH NO, - he wrinkles his face as if doing mental calculations - your boyfriend I meant! You being my girlfriend, that's what I mean. You know?

Whoa. How could I possibly deny such an eloquent proposal?

- You really know how to pave your way through a girl's heart. I mean, the way you talk just... blows my mind.

He gives me this dead serious expression as if taking what I just said literally. He is not aware of his own greatness:

- Are you serious? - he says.

- Sure... - I say sarcastically. And he just starts smiling proudly. How not to love him?

- Wait... is that a yes them?

I smile at him suspensefully, then kiss him passionately:

- Yes, dummy. I only needed to know you wanted to.

We hold hands and make out a little, and then just lay there in each other's embrace for some time.

- You know what we should do? - he says, breaking the silence suddenly - let's just, like, vanish for some time, you know?

- What? Vanish? No!

- No, no, hear me out! My brother has this cabin back in the country, you know? We can take the car and just spend some days there, just you and me.

I entertain the thought for a moment. What if?

- I... I don't know, Sam. That's... kinda crazy. Fleeing home?

- Yeah, so what? We just leave for a while, away from everything, parents, school, all the crap, you know? Just you and me for some time, and then we get back, refreshed and stuff. You know?

A little out-of-season vacation? Not gonna lie, that's not too bad of an idea. And my parents will be so pissed...

... which is great!

- Hmm. Just you and me for several days, uh? - I stare at him teasingly - you definitely don't have second intentions in mind, do you?

He immediately blushes and goes all embarrassed:

- Well, uh, I mean... you know?

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I just lose the sense of time as we hang out by the park when all of a sudden a man approaches us. It scares me a bit, but I immediately see it is crazy-eyed Bob. But... something is off.

He always has this wide grin on his face, but today his face was completely somber as if he was mourning or something.

- Hey Bob, sorry, I don't have bread today, but here is a bit of money for your breakfast - I say, as I reach into my pockets for some money, but he doesn't react to it, in fact, he doesn't even look at it - ... is everything alright, Bob?

He stares blankly right past us as if gazing into something unseen, which really starts to freak us out.

- Why you, Sarah? I don't get it. - he says in an atypical serious and dark tone, very different from his usual joyful way of talking. He leans down and looks me dead in the eyes - You will need to be strong, Sarah. He loves you too much. - he says, then starts crying.

I'm really freaking out right now. What the fuck is this old braggart talking about?!

I was starting to lose my shit when a car honk scares me out of the moment, sending Crazy-eyed Bob walking away to his own business. You gotta be kidding me.

My mother and father were inside our car, and they signaled me to come inside. We look at each other distraught, but I give Samuel a last kiss and make my way inside without a word.

We exchange looks until we are out of sight. We have been separated for now, but we both know we'll be together soon.

Didn't exchange a single word with my parents from the moment I got in, to the moment I locked myself in my bedroom.

Between my malefic plans with Samuel, my problem with Dad and mom, and that weird-ass interaction with Bob, I have a lot in my mind to deal with right now. Honestly, so much weird shit happening around lately, it doesn't even look like the same old, boring city anymore.

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I start to write down my plans and pack up my stuff as I discuss the details with Sam by texting. This is gonna be huge!

Let's see: let's grab my best clothes, then there are my shoes, my makeup... I'd have gone to buy new underwear if I knew this would happen, but anyway. I dress up a bit in front of the mirror, trying costumes I think Samuel would like. I got my corset, my garter belt, leggings, and my best necklaces. Not bad, Sarah, I think to myself.

Then, I'd pack up some books in case I felt like reading, and my sketchbook in case I started to feel artistic. Who knows what the natural environment might inspire me to do. Perhaps I even get wild and start singing again a little.

With my luggage ready, I go to bed anxious for tomorrow, texting Samuel until I fall asleep right there in the spot.