Novels2Search
the hero, the villain,and the profiteer
Chapter: 1a: two smart idiots

Chapter: 1a: two smart idiots

( a hooded figure lays unconscious on a 12 x 12 foot dimly-lit carved Stone room)

...*nnnrr*...

( he shakily gets up)

....*eerrf*.

(He begins rubbing his head)

Feels like my head was shoved in a wood chipper....

( looks around)

... Where the fuck am I?.....

( a small winged female in a one piece floats in)

... A tiny winged humanoid.... I wonder what it tastes like.

[ the fariy] what?

[the guy] nothing, I think I'm hungry.

[ the fairy]oh, allow me to get you something master.

[ the guy]...master?... I just met her- I mean you,.. It's hard to think on an empty stomach, and a headache.... The point was don't immediately call someone that;... After being beaten down and or having your Wings ripped off, that's another story.

[ the fairy]excuse-me?

[The guy] never you mind,

( he lays back down)

I'm pretty much useless until.........UNtil food is in my stomach.

[ the fairy]...

( turns back the way she came)

ysh,inewthtnewburndngnmstrswerswerstrng,btthsgusjstbizr.{yeesh, i knew that dungeon masters were strange, but this guy's just bizzare.}

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(15 minutes later)

[the man laying on the ground].........*mmmmmmrrrrrrrrrrg*........

(he Chomps on a passing cricket)

[theman]...... Tastes like pus....

( fairy floats in somehow holding a rabbit just off the ground)

[the fairy]here is some food Master!

( she drops it in front of him)

( he just eats it like a f****** snake, starting with the head)

...*mmmmh*..

hello, you might be confused by the fact that you're position has changed immediately, now here's the deal: stir up things in this world and you can stay there,.. Or not I don't judge. I have given you the ability to see others status screens, as well as empowering or depowering others, have fun!

[the man].mh?.... What the bitch is this?........... That explains where I am... It also reveals I can do somthing.

 name: unknown

species: dungeon Lord

job: doctor, torturer, macinist, Alchemist, researcher

level: 1

attack:67

defence:17

intelligence:173

agility:17

Mana:1278

abilities: dungeon control , analysis: visible, illusion, regenerate: others , bestow ability, take ability

This tale has been pilfered from Royal Road. If found on Amazon, kindly file a report.

passive abilities: chemical knowledge: novice, machine knowledge: novice, medical knowledge: novice

titles: sadist, curious, heartless, iron stomach, dungeon heart,Literate

equipment: Hood robe 

[the man]........... I don't know what bothers me more, the fact that im a glass Cannon in a way,... or that I'm naked underneath this thing.

( he touched "dungeon control" on the screen)

dungeon control

dig, fill, dominate, mold, assimilate object, assimilate animal skill, skill bestow, drop set, item recreate, soul sight, decorate , floor adding, floor rearrangement

[the man] so if a text is red that means it's an umbrella term.

( Taps the two blue texts)

assimilate object assimilate animal skill

objects assimilated by the natural process being abandoned within your zone of influence which can be recreated by you indefinitely given sufficient mana

Assimilated items can also be set as" drops" for when your creatures are killed

skills obtained from dead animals being assimilated by the natural process in your zone of influence, or from being dominated

can be used by you or bestowed upon creatures you have dominated,, limited only by the creature itself

objects: coins{ gold, silver, copper} medical herbs{ cuts and bruises, Minor poison,} skills: enhanced jumping, minor presence detect, brood

[ the man]...... Did I just eat a live rabbit.

[ the fairy] yes..... I wasn't expecting you to eat it whole..... Or even without skinning it.

[  the man]...... Remind me later to cut my stomach open, don't want Rapunzel syndrome...... I forgot to ask, who the hell are you?

[ the fairy] Santa Maria Liana Mavis Esquire, your newly appointed dungeon Fairy

( she bows in mid-air)

[ the man]... YYeah,... I'm not calling you that.... Now your name is tink.

[ Tink]WHAT,WHAT?!NONONONO!

Name: Tink

species: dungeon fairy

stats too low to number

passive abilities: dungeon knowledgelage: sage

[tink]NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

(she curls up almost crying)

[tink] my beautiful name.

[ the man]..... Your name isn't the only thing to worry about... You seem to be almost useless for anything besides a living encyclopedia about Dungeons....

( stifled laughter)....

[tink]IT'S NOT FUNNY!

[ the man]... Yes it is, I have that much power over you,

( laughs until the sobbing dies down)

[the man]....................... I wonder..    

( activates: bestow skill{ Target: tink})

[the man].......... No,..... no,..... no,....... It seems like I can only bestow skills I already have............

[ Tink] wha?( she looks at her status screen again)

Name: Tink

species: dungeon fairy

stats too low to number

abilities: analysis: visual, illusion

passive abilities: dungeon knowledge: Sage, medical knowledge: novice

[tink] whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?

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[ tink].......

( she gets up all in his face, literally her whole body an inch away from his face)

quick-tell-me-your-skills!

[ the man] abilities: dungeon control , analysis: visible, illusion, regenerate: others , bestow skill

passive abilities: chemical knowledge: novice, machine knowledge: novice, medical knowledge: novice

[ Tink] how is this possible dungeon Lords are born with only one ability!..... Wait,... What were you trying to give me?

[ the man] just ones that would make you cry harder: whoring: adept, regurgitate, massage: therro, then I tried the ones I already had and that is why you have useful ones.

[ tink]( only being able to make this face in response) [http://31.media.tumblr.com/392974d14015230bb8e2acc02ce3a6d8/tumblr_mtajbm3tkZ1rts3jio1_500.gif](her jaw droped and started twitching in disbelef and descust)

[ the man] ( laughs similar to how you'd expect a large rodent to laugh)

[the man]that is a beautiful face of disgust.

[tink].............................................................. You are SO lucky my only meaning of existence is to Aid you!

[ the man]......( calmly) Could you give good comparison of our intended relationship?

[tink] ( still a little perturbed)

like gut Flora, but instead of aiding digestion, I was supposed to tell you what the rules were and how to do the things you're supposed to do.

[theman]...mmhh,hmm,.. And after that?

[tink] an extra pair of eyes in the ears, an alarm for intruders, and somebody to talk to.

[ the man].... That's stupid,.... That is really stupid,... Your job could have been filled in by a book with a crude smiley face drawn on it.... Now after I gave you those skills you can actually help,.. hell, you  already did

[tink].( a little confused).. How so?

[tm] by demonstrating that the acquiring of a knowledge-based ability is enough to gain the knowledge. Which leads me to believe that gaining the ability adds the knowledge on how to use it. Which means I can put information in people's heads,. oh this is going to be fun,.. But I digress,.. Would you kindly use illusion to turn yourself into a mirror,.. And before you ask the reasoning is one: I want to see, the extent of the skill, and two:..... I just want to see what I look like,... Ever since waking up here my body has not felt... Correct.

[tink]....okaaaay....

(she uses illusion to make herself look like a mirror)

( the guy takes off his robe in one fluid motion, revealing a thin body with a slight pudge, long legs, slender strong-looking arms ending with long fingers, and a thin face with darkbags under the eyes, all completely hairless except for the top of his head sporting disheveled looking short hair that seems to constantly be changing color)

[tm]..... This is not me.