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The Friends of Giichi Hasegawa
#21 - We Are So Done, Boys!

#21 - We Are So Done, Boys!

Before Quade went on to save Giichi and drive to the gangster warehouse - the Slaughterhouse, as Odette called it - a phone call happens between the Blackbird Syndicate Boss and BB, the boss of the Big Bad Boys (BB Boys) branch. Their hospital plan went off with a bang, and they were on their way to this warehouse, but the phone call... makes them have other plans.

"... boys, we are screwed."

BB continues to sit in the back as his gangster companions look at him. A tense look on his face, morbid tension as he stares out the window in absolute concern.

"... what do you mean, boss?" the driver asks, too focused on driving to look back at his superior. "We're invincible, the police are absolutely no match for your BB shot... what's the problem, sir?"

BB takes a deep, deep breath. "... listen. I think we may have shot the Boss's wife..."

"Huh?"

"The Boss's wife!" BB incorrectly deduces. "That receptionist lady we shot on the way out, see?! W-We might have badly messed up, and the boss is going to kill me!"

"N-No, BB, sir, you didn't shoot her, I did-" the gangster in the passenger seat responds. "I can take the fall for it, sir!"

"It's the Boss's wife, you really think one man's enough?!" BB asks, staring at his foolish underling. "He'll go to the ends of the Earth to torture you, me, and anyone else his wife rats out! We are S-C-R-E-W-D, SCREWED!"

"... t-there's another E in screwed, Boss..."

"Right, screewd," BB contently tells his underling.

"No, it- never mind."

"... anyway! We gots to come up with a plan, see?!" BB exclaims, pointing a finger to the side of his head. "The boss'll be expecting us back at the warehouse... maybe he'd send a guy to come check on us and teach us a lesson for hurting his wife! So- c'mon, boys, let's think! Think up a plan, got it?!"

"W-Well, uhm... hmmm..."

"Uhmmm... maybe- no..."

"What if... huh... no, no, it... uhm..."

The car is left in a thinking state as the car drives along, BB continuing to hold a gun out the window and aiming at any potential police car that may spot them next. Their thoughts accompanied by the lack of sirens, as the exploding police cars sent a sufficient enough message to not pursue this car.

"... oh, boss, I got it!" a gangster exclaims. "Before the Boss kills us, boss, what if we- what if we, like, hid the girl somewhere that ISN'T our warehouse?"

"That's genius! Brandy, you're getting a promotion to our thinker, our Big Brain Boy!" BB shouts, a silly cadence to his voice. Absolutely relieved that "Brandy" came up with that big brain boy plan. "Now, the only question is- where is the most secure place we could take this girl without anyone noticing? We need somewhere secret that not even the Boss knows about, see...?"

More thinking as the car drives along, and BB - hearing a siren - shoots at it, accordingly. A police car sent flying through the air, ending up on top of a roof as the gangsters drive past.

"... w... what about my apartment?" a different gangster asks. "I could probably hide all of us there, once we ditch the car. It's nearby!"

"Oh! Brilliant, Bonbon!" BB exclaims, clapping his hands together. "Let's dump these wheels and get to your apartment!"

Thus, the gangsters drive the car somewhere secluded, leaving the car and getting ready for their walk. Opening the trunk of the car to retrieve the girl they just kidnapped, looking at her in her unconscious glory...

... and, after the gangsters took her from the hospital, Giichi is looking noticeably pale. Her eyes faintly open with an empty gaze behind them, blankly staring off and in the midst of suffering from her poisoning.

"R-Right, she tangled with the bartender, poisoning and all..." BB mumbles. "Of course she's on the verge of death already..."

"Do we leave her here, then, boss?"

"No, no, the Boss will want her, she's our little bargaining chip. Our 'Bargaining Broad', see?" BB tells the other gangsters. "C'mon. Let's get her outta the trunk and get her to our hiding spot!"

With BB holding Blaze in his arms, that left the four gangsters to carry Giichi. Four being necessary, as she... weighed a lot, despite her average physique. The gangsters begin their march to Bonbon's apartment, taking some time to head to this discreet apartment that no one would think to look at.

Apartment 103 of Sunshine Apartments.

"Excellent! This place is brilliant, Bonbon! Why have we never come here before?!" BB exclaims, looking around the small living space. Modest living room, modest kitchen, modest bathroom and modest bedroom.

"Well, I didn't want to embarrass myself, it's- not really that good, boss..."

"Embarrass? More like, 'barrass', Bonbon! This is the best apartment I've ever seen, see?!" BB exclaims, putting Blaze on the couch and sitting on it. Kicking back and relaxing, grinning at his gangster underling with pride. "You got a classic pad here! I'm making you the, uh... the... hm."

Scratching his chin, BB thinks to himself for a moment. Synonyms for house designer... synonyms... synonyms... really wrapping his head around this. There has to be good enough words to convey that Bonbon is the best at designing hangout spots with his interior skills and expertise. There's just a style in this apartment that really matches what he's going for, some- rustic, simple stuff, maybe...

... bed.

"Bed Blueprinter!" BB exclaims, snapping his fingers in this brilliant show of names. "There we go! You're the Bed Blueprint Boy now, Bonbon!"

"Uh- t-thank you, boss!" the gangster exclaims, visibly honored by this.

With the Big Brain Boy and the Bed Blueprint Boy in his ranks, BB is very enthusiastic about his chances of survival. No one can top the Big Bad Boys and their excellent BB powers!

...

Except the Boss, who is going to kill them for shooting his wife.

"Okay, okay, so, we now have a hiding spot, let's get to brainstorming what best to do now," BB tells the gangsters, leaning forward. Resting his hands on his thighs, staring down at Bonbon's coffee table. "We need a-"

"A beef bringer?" a gangster asks, titling his head. "Someone to bring food here, discreetly, so that the Boss doesn't notice us, boss?"

"..." BB stares deeply at this gangster's suggestion, an uncomfortably silent 30 seconds passing of just two gangsters locked in an intense stare off. Absolute utter silence, the atmosphere of the room giving off signs that this gangster just deeply offended BB.

"... uhm- I, uh, boss, I-" the gangster begins to stutter-

"I freaking LOVE it!" BB exclaims, interrupting this gangster with a (forced) proud grin. His face absolutely beaming with (fake) brightness at this. "Taking initiative, I see! Good on you, Beef Bringer! We need to get enough beef for six people, with drinks and stuff! Here, take my pouch full of big bucks and buy the most discreet stuff you can get, see?!"

The new Beef Bringer gangster gasps, covering his mouth for a moment as BB hands him his wallet. "Y... You got it, boss! I'll get right on it!" Running out of the apartment to go buy some supplies and such.

BB widely smiles and chuckles, sitting back and... sighing, once the Beef Bringer is gone. His false happiness fading as he's back to seriousness. "... alright, boys, if our Beef Bringer doesn't come back, we'll safely know the Boss is out for our blood. Let's get back on track."

In that moment, BB basically revealed that - for this gangster trying to give himself the absolute waste of a title, "Beef Bringer", he used Beef Bringer as cannon fodder to decide their safety, to decide if they were good to live. If this gangster doesn't come back, the Boss is out for blood. If he does, then they have food and can probably, probably leave this very apartment.

A rather cruel thing to do to an underling.

But BB is a cruel person.

BB leans back into the couch, letting out a gentle hmm. "C'mon, let's get to thinking. Any plans, any plans for our survival, anything that will somehow guarantee all of us- all of us in this apartment here, we get to live."

With Beef Bringer potentially sent off to his death, that leaves BB, the original getaway driver named Blaze, her replacement that drove after she got knocked out, Big Brain Brandy, and Bed Blueprinter Bonbon. All of these gangsters are now very, very deep in thought, with BB sitting on the couch, lounging and thinking heavily. Brandy pacing back and forth in the apartment. Bonbon walking into the kitchen to retrieve some drinks. Blaze, still passed out on the couch after her ambulance accident, and the replacement driver who has yet to be named...

"..." The replacement driver is slowly looking to the hostage they have, his eyes glancing at the unconscious Giichi that they just left on the floor. Staring at her for quite a long time, really thinking about it, before coming up with something. "... boss, I got a plan. What if we trick this girl's companions into helping us?"

"Trick the-" BB begins to ask, staring at the replacement driver. "Are you mad?! That's a death sentence, a burial for us- not even a burial, do you know what these people did to the bartender?!"

"I mean, if she-"

"She PUNCHED a bartender into SPACE, Brandy!" BB shouts. "She literally flew INTO the air and punched a fully grown man into space! There is no telling what's going to happen next if-"

Brandy clears his throat, covering for this driver with his big brain moment. "We treat her good, boss! We treat the girl here good! We become the GG Guys, 'Gangster Gentlemen' Guys!"

If you spot this tale on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation.

...

A simple five second pause before BB claps his hands together, genuinely astonished by this. Contrasting how he treated Beef Bringer, BB seemed absolutely proud by this, and is completely on board with the proposed plan. "Brilliant! So we'll make the girl believe we're friends and strike up an alliance?"

"Y-Yes, boss!" Brandy exclaims. "We'll team up with the girl and her friends to protect ourselves from the Boss, boss! Y'know?"

"Ooooh, you are EXACTLY the thinker I took you for!" BB exclaims, getting up and pressing his hands against the man's cheeks. Almost buttering up his best boy, dare he say 'bestest' boy, with a strange show of praise and respect. An inappropriately awkward show of respect as his greatest gangster underling is being pet like a bulldog. "Brandy! You have singlehandedly saved the BB Boys from total devastation!"

... Brandy and the other gangsters are too afraid to upset his boss, and just goes along with this for the entire time. The driver watching firsthand two men engaged in an awkwardly unprofessional moment.

"Alright, now-" BB begins to speak and explain, pulling his hands away from Big Brain Brandy's face. "In order for this girl to form an alliance with us, we need to figure out what to do to get her in fit condition, to show that we're good guys to her and her friends now. Now, what exactly could we do to do this...?"

"Hmm- maybe we could put her on the couch?"

"Maybe. Couches are cozy. Bonbon's couch is great."

"We could make her some dinner, encourage her to join our side with grub?"

"Hmm! Yes, that's good, that's good! What else, boys?"

"... well, you could cure her of her poison."

"Right, cure her of her-"

Immediately, the gangsters look in the direction of the unconscious girl, staring at a red cloud. The words escaping the mist's mouth, Rosemary giving herself away the very moment she spoke.

"Yeah... you could totally cure her of her poison, Boss!" Rosemary exclaims, trying to mimic the sound of a gangster speaking. "Curing her of the poison will make her completely fit to-"

"Y-You're trying to trick us!" Bonbon shouts, pointing at the cloud. "That's the gas cloud, boss! The voice that arrested, like, a lot of us!"

"Right!" BB's eyes widen as he looks to the cloud of gas floating over the girl. "You cannot fool us, I know that the Big Bad Boys only has one woman amidst its ranks, and your dry voice ain't nothing compared to the sweet melody of our beautiful Blaze!"

Blaze is still too unconscious to respond to this, but would probably be very flattered by this.

"S-Should we do something about it, boss?! Maybe one of your BB shots?!" Brandy shouts, drawing his gun and taking aim at Rosemary. "T-This thing ain't gonna trust us now, it's overheard our entire plan!"

"N-No, Big Brain Brandy, we can't risk ruining Bed Blueprinter Bonbon's lovely, lovely apartment!" BB shouts, frantically exclaiming as he speaks for the entire group of gangsters in this apartment at this very moment. "If I fire a BB Shot in here, it's going to destroy his fine curtains and probably everything else in his apartment! Plus, it's a literal cloud of gas, my shot ain't gonna physically do anything to it!"

"You never know... maybe it would work... we should totally try it, Boss..." Rosemary mumbles, attempting to instigate this guy to shoot the bullet for fun. Knowing full well she and Giichi were pretty much bulletproof, unaware of the power his BB shot came with.

"Can you stop pretending to be my boys?!" BB angrily shouts at the cloud. "It ain't working, I ain't gonna do it, see?! ... so let's move on! What the hell do you want?!"

Rosemary stops her attempt, just noting the gangster's voice and panic, and very much thriving off of this. "... simple, to cure my poison. Your poison's definitely taking a toll on me, and I really- really- do not particularly enjoy it... so I want to be not poisoned. Maybe, even know what can cure it."

BB crosses his arms. "Not doing that, cloudy... no way in hell are we sacrificing our chances to get you."

"You said it yourself, right...? You shot the Boss's wife," Rosemary almost repeats and recites the gangster's exact words. "He's totally going to mess you all up, do some heinous and unspeakable actions to each and every one of you. I know I'd do it if my partner, oh, I dunno, got poisoned and kidnapped by some imbeciles alone..."

"Tch- this thing has us figured out..." the currently unnamed replacement driver of the group mumbles, arms crossed.

"Right... right," BB sighs, before answering the gas. "... look, even if we knew how to cure your poison, it isn't like we could just- do it, see? The guy you punched into space, his specific brew of poison is unknown to us. He doesn't work for me, I don't work with him- that's the problem in its wholeness, see? Can't help you."

"So both of our parties lose and we're both dead. Sounds about right," Rosemary bluntly tells the gangster. "Really pathetic of you. I can't help you if me and the brown haired girl here die from your gang poison... so..."

"..."

BB holds the palm of his hand against his face, a deep sigh escaping his lips. "Damned red clouds trying to rile me up. Fine! Boys, we're getting a cure for this girl's poison or whatever. What do we do to cure poison?"

A shrug from everyone present, as no one here knew how to cure poison.

"... blast..." BB mumbles in defeat.

"Well... do we know anything about the bartender? Anywhere he got the poison, where the antidote could be?" Rosemary asks, remembering that the bartender mentioned knowing about an antidote. "Knowing about him helps all of us."

"Well, we probably could have learned about him, if the brown haired girl here didn't punch him into space!" Brandy exclaims, staring at the unconscious Giichi that they personally saw roaring and punching the gangster bartender into space.

"I see. Well, what if he survives?" Rosemary asks, suggesting something absolutely ridiculous.

"H-How the hell does a man survive being punched into space?!" Brandy shouts.

Rosemary, if she had a face right now, would be smirking. "Happened before. Could happen again."

"NOT WITH A NORMAL MAN!" Brandy shouts loudly, falling for the bait.

"... boss, my apartment is a simple sacrifice!" Bonbon exclaims angrily, almost pleading with BB to shoot Rosemary at how much disrespect the cloud is showing to the now deceased bartender. "I'm open to finding a new place to live!"

"Easy- easy, you two, it's trying to get us riled up," BB tells the two gangsters, before looking back to the cloud. "Now, listen up, only the bartender knew about how to actually- cure poisons, see? He's done it plenty of times, and all of our guys never had to deal with accidental poison. No way in hell are we getting caught looking this information up, so - on our own - we are all out of luck," BB tells the cloud.

The gangsters collectively nod, agreeing with BB's statement.

BB finally follows it up with a finishing statement, a bold and confident one to really- assert dominance, to try and make clear who is running the show in this apartment. "But then again, y'know, you're the only one of us that's poisoned. However long you get to live, we got enough time to find our new bargaining chip. So you're in our care, and it's in your best interest to do what we say with what time you have left."

"Right, suuuure. I'm in the care of dead men responsible for shooting your superior's wife, the head of this entire mafia you run," Rosemary idly tells BB, completely unintimidated by what BB suggested. Deciding to one up him on this, even if she can't do anything against him in her poisoned condition. "I'm willing to take bets on who will die more painfully, me or you unlucky meat sacks practically begging to simultaneously become Starveil City's newest fossil exhibit, volunteer organ donors, and maybe pet food."

An uncomfortable silence as Rosemary just tells these gangsters something absolutely bloody and gruesome the more one thinks about it. Absolutely unsettling.

And BB, appropriately, processes all of this with a visibly... unsettled look of respect for this thing. "... god damn, Cloudy, who the hell pissed in your cereal...?"

"Your boss, pretty much," Rosemary answers, completely unbothered and absolutely thriving off of the uncomfortable energy she's creating in this apartment.

"Right... right. Fine. Whatever. Let's move on. We'll figure out your poison, and you protect us from the Boss," BB tells Rosemary, conceding defeat in this conversation.

"Sure, sure, let's see if it gets that far," Rosemary responds. "Now, come on, let's use our heads more. Did your bartender have a poison guy? Like, a guy who provided him poison to do that ice cube trick?"

"Did it all himself," BB answers, shaking his head. "Guy works as a bartender for his day job, but he's actually a professional mixologist and chemist. Dude knew what to get himself, lived all by himself, and made sure to keep his secrets in check."

"Huh... and... we're sure that he's-?"

"People can't breathe in space, so... yes, he's dead as a doorstep, cloudy."

"Right... hm." Rosemary is regretting her actions against the one person able to save her right now, but - in her defense - she is literally thinking about why she should have spared the one person that is the most successful at trying to kill Giichi and her friends.

But it's whatever. Back to thinking. "Alright. How about taking me to- I dunno, one of your doctors? Your black market doctors, whatever guys you go to whenever you dead guys get shot?"

"All of them are under the Boss's control," BB responds, shaking his head.

"And?" Rosemary asks.

"And the Boss will kill us if we go to them," BB continues.

"Yes?" Rosemary continues.

"... so... we can't- go there, or we're going to die," BB further explains.

"Mhmm... and?" Rosemary asks again. "It's a sacrifice I am willing to make, on your behalf."

"... you're one hell of a bitch, you know that?" BB remarks.

"So are you," Rosemary bluntly tells him. "One guy gets sent into space and suddenly all of you are imbecilic boneheads. Big Bad Boys, more like Big Buffoon Boys. Subjecting me to your pathetic little 'B' theme. How about growing some B's before deciding you wanted to live?"

"Not like you know anyone..." Bonbon mumbles.

"Right, I don't. So anyway, here's a suggestion," Rosemary begins to tell these gangsters, having only- one more idea in the chamber that is her head. "Take me back to the hospital. Let the doctors find out for us."

"..." Tch. BB grits his teeth and shakes his head. "No way are we going back. They know our faces. We're arrested on sight if we go back, see? Then we're not much help to you."

"Hmm," Rosemary noises, her gaseous form doing some semblance of a nod. "... well, then, I got nothing. I'm awake now, and you all are tooooootally free to try and come up with a better idea to save all of our skins."

BB just... nods slowly. "Right. Right... let's get to thinking, boys."

"Should we do what we already just now came up with, boss?" Bonbon immediately asks, tilting his head.

"... yes," BB tells Bonbon, smiling.

With that, Giichi's body is lifted up by the gangsters to sit on the couch with BB. Bonbon moves into the kitchen to prepare some dinner, and the rest of the awake gangsters are now in even more intensive thought.

"... does the TV work?" Rosemary asks, glancing to the gangsters.

"Oh, yeah, it should," Bonbon tells them. "Why? Is there something good on?"

"It's something to have in the background while I have to stand you idiots," Rosemary bluntly tells them. "Mind turning it on for me, gangster?"

"..." BB's eyes remain narrowed at Rosemary, and just... nods. "You know what? Fine. I wanted to watch TV anyway, see?" Reaching for the remote and turning on the TV, the apartment now subjected to the very first thing that shows up when the screen is on...

... a blue screen with text on it.

"...?" BB stares at this screen for a moment, reading the text. "What does this say...?"

"... s-shit-! Wait, is this a TV with internet connection?!" Brandy shouts, staring at Bonbon with wide eyes.

"Huh? Oh- yeah, why do you-" Bonbon begins to speak, staring forward and...

... realizing along with the others what this means, as the message displays on the TV.

"... FOUND YOU, BB."

"S... Shit! Oh, shit, boss!" Brandy exclaims, looking to BB. "T-The TV's serving as a beacon to the entire syndicate! T-They know we're here!"

"W-WHAT?!" Rosemary shouts loudly. "WAIT, YOUR BOSS HAS ACCESS TO INTERNET TVS?!"

"I- I didn't know that! I thought he only had access to the phone lines if we call!" Bonbon shouts, looking to the others, panicked. "Oh, god, oh no-! The Boss is going to get us, boss...! W-What do we do?!"

BB leans forward... a horrified look on his face. "... damn it-! We need to defend ourselves! Get your guns loaded and prepare for the worst, now!"

"Y-Yes, sir!" The gangsters begin to load their weapons, and - collectively - begin scrambling to barricade this apartment.

BB then turns to Rosemary, staring at her intensely. "W-We need you on board as well, Cloudy! Can you move at all?!"

"N-NO!" Rosemary shouts. "I- I can't do anything with the poison in me. Talking alone is a struggle on its own! Shit-!"

"Tch...!" BB takes his gun and begins loading bullets into it, taking deep breaths. "... then I guess it's on me, boys! Starting from this moment, we are now branded traitors to the Boss's syndicate! Will you stand with me, gangsters, to the very end?!"

"Y-Yes, sir!" Bonbon exclaims.

"I'll follow you to the ends of the earth, boss...!" Brandy exclaims.

"No other choice...!" the still unnamed, replacement driver exclaims.

The actual driver, Blaze, remains unconscious.

BB smiles at this, a cocky grin on his face, knowing that he has the best boys in the world backing him up. "... then- let's do this, BB Boys!"