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The Final Desperation
190 – Pain and Numbness

190 – Pain and Numbness

"I choose Water," Ij'gne answered with a firm expression.

Joten nodded internally with approval, but he showed no indication of his thoughts. "Can I ask why?"

"Because I believe water is the foundation for the other styles. It might seem bland compared to the others, but it will prepare me for the other Inspirations."

"Good choice," Joten said with a smile.

And so, Ij'gne began his training in Water Inspiration. He worked harder than ever, pushing his mind and body to their utmost limits, day after day, before doing it all over again. Each day left him sore and stumbling through the settlement, but the struggles only fueled his resolve.

Even when his body was too exhausted to continue, his training didn't stop. Instead, he redirected his focus to reviewing his morning sessions, dissecting them hundreds of times over. Every little mistake was magnified countless times, followed by the necessary corrections for the following morning.

This effort eventually paid off when he achieved high mastery of Water Inspiration in merely six months, a record time among his age group. The only ones who surpassed it were the experienced martial artists who could master the technique within days of learning.

With this result, Joten opened up the other three styles to Ij'gne, allowing him to experience the martial art's true might. Each Inspiration wove into the others, revealing insights that had been overlooked.

Because of this interconnection, advancing in a single art led to a multiplicative increase in his combat power rather than a linear one. This synergy is why the Inspirations are unified under one martial art rather than divided into four separate styles.

Out of the four Inspirations, Ij'gne made the least progress in Fire. For some reason, he just couldn't grasp the mental state that Joten often lectured about.

On the other hand, he showed great potential in Wind due to his abnormally fast reaction speed. Although his precision still needed work, the lack of collisions meant he could practice far more than his peers and better hone his control.

Applying this experience to Earth with Water's force conservation, it didn't take long before Earth also reached high mastery. Joten was surprised by his rate of progress, but he didn't make a fuss about it and encouraged him to work harder.

As a result of this validation, Ij'gne devoted even more time to training, sacrificing every moment of free time. The numerous mental simulations caused his mind to ache, and his memories of this period began to blur.

Ij'gne couldn't recount much about this period, only that he repeated his grueling schedule for what felt like years, devoid of any social interaction. It was inhumane how hard he pushed himself, but he gladly endured everything for revenge.

In the end, he achieved perfection in Water and high mastery in Wind, while Earth and Fire remained unchanged. Ij'gne made significant progress in the first three Inspirations, but Fire stubbornly refused to budge. This frustrated him, but Joten reassured him not to worry about it. His improvement was already remarkable, and he had plenty of time to develop further.

But Ij'gne didn't want to wait. He knew Joten was stronger than him, having achieved perfection in three Inspirations and high mastery in Wind, but even Joten wasn't enough to take on the barbarians alone. If Ij'gne wanted to improve further, he needed real combat experience. Thus, he applied to guard the mountain range that separated their land from the barbarians.

The roots of the World Tree extended even to this area, reinforcing it against any external damage. Here, Ij'gne fought against invaders daily, honing his skills amidst life and death. If there were no invaders on a given day, Ij'gne would descend the mountain and find a foe. During this period, he witnessed many deaths, both of allies and enemies, but he numbly tuned it all out, persisting with a mind of steel.

The invaders used a strange martial art capable of generating power out of seemingly thin air. Furthermore, they had seemingly endless stamina, delivering heavy strikes without any concern for their energy consumption. It felt like Ij'gne was fighting opponents with perfect Water and Earth Inspirations, but their subpar muscle control told him otherwise.

Under this pressure, his Earth Inspiration eventually reached perfection, and his Fire Inspiration finally made some progress. This made the fights much more even, but the arrival of stronger invaders erased any sense of advancement.

With each passing day, the enemies grew stronger, eventually forcing Ij'gne back into the mountains. There were so many barbarians that it became actively dangerous to venture out alone. The guards stationed there noticed the change and called for reinforcements. For the next three days, neither side sent out any parties to attack the opposition. It was the calm before the storm until, finally, war erupted.

People flew through the rugged terrain, utilizing guerrilla tactics and every possible means under the sun. From deadly traps to sabotage, they did it all. Rivers of blood washed away the dirt of the mountain, scaring off all wildlife and creating a red runoff.

Maggot-infested corpses could be seen with every step, permeating the mountain with a revolting smell of decay. Ij'gne thrived in this environment and learned many survival skills crucial to his success.

The conflict raged on for half a month before the barbarians' big shots took action and breached the defense line.

As two barbarians held off the defenders, their leader slipped through and wreaked havoc on the settlement. They killed everyone in their path as they beelined for the World Tree. In the end, Reverend Zarasu had to step in and confront the invader in a devastating battle.

Loud explosions and the rumbling of collapsing houses echoed for kilometers. Hearing this, all the defending martial artists intensified their attacks, striving to end their battles quickly so they could assist the reverend. However, the barbarians were relentless. Many even sacrificed themselves to stall the martial artists, heightening the defenders' urgency.

The battle soon became a bloodbath, a chaotic fray of frenzied combat and slaughter. Ij'gne struggled in this turbulent sea, doing everything he could to keep himself afloat. After what felt like an eternity, the attacks finally ceased, and the barbarians retreated. They had won the battle, but at what cost?

Surveying the aftermath, Ij'gne lamented their losses before dragging his exhausted body back to the stronghold. The person in charge granted half the survivors a day off to recover from the stress before they would be required to replace the other half. Ij'gne was among the second group and apathetically watched the logistics team clean up the battlefield for an entire day.

After that, it was his turn to rest. He didn't know what to feel as he walked through the collapsed settlement or even what he was looking for. All he had in mind right now was to pass the day and return to his post. War had changed him and consumed all traces of naivety, making him more emotionless than ever, despite how impossible that seemed.

'Why are we doing this anymore?' he wondered to himself.

In his lost state, Ij'gne gazed up at the World Tree for direction, only to see a deep gouge on the recently healed scar. The barbarian had added another wound to their lord's trunk, further incapacitating it. Soft creaks of wood could be heard from afar, testifying to the tree's feeble state.

Ij'gne sighed to himself and continued walking, gradually coming upon a somber procession. On closer examination, he realized this was a funeral for the fallen soldiers of yesterday. Ij'gne followed out of obligation, and they soon arrived at a vacant hill. The group parted ways to reveal Reverend Zarasu carrying a stone pillar with the names of the fallen.

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As Zarasu walked up, Ij'gne noticed the thick layer of bandages wrapped around his chest, covering the wounds left by the invader.

"My dear friends and citizens, we have lost many beloved members of our community—friends, family, neighbors. Their absence leaves a void that words can't fill, but we must stay strong. Our lord remains standing and carries the burden of the world on its crown. We mustn't give up hope and abandon it in times of despair. Instead, let this pain fuel us to improve so that a tragedy like this one will never repeat itself. Until then, let us dedicate this monument to the brave fighters who gave up their lives for us."

Once Zarasu finished his rallying speech, he placed the pillar into the ground and gave the audience time to find their acquaintances' names. Ij'gne followed to pass the time when he suddenly saw a familiar name: Joten.

"Teacher?" He mumbled in disbelief. "No, it can't be!"

Unwilling to believe this truth, Ij'gne ran to Joten's accommodation, desperately praying this was someone else with the same name. However, it was rare to find such a coincidence in a small settlement like this, especially when the name was listed in the combatants' section.

Wham

Ij'gne kicked open Joten's door, but his heart sank when he saw the wreath of white marigold flowers on the floor. Among the World Tree's believers, this was the custom used to mourn the death of a close friend. The origin stems from the belief that marigolds purify the soul, allowing them to pass on peacefully.

"Why! Why does it have to be him!?!" he roared uncontrollably and slammed the bottom of his fist against the wall. In an unexpected turn of events, only the area directly beneath his fist collapsed, leaving the surrounding material unharmed.

All the force had been concentrated in this location, pulverizing it. It was only now that Ij'gne understood what it meant to become a destructive inferno, channeling all his wrath and grief to consume his enemies. Fire Inspiration had broken through to high mastery...

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A few hours later, Ij'gne could be seen on top of a hill, blankly staring off at the setting sun. Zarasu approached from behind and patted Ij'gne's shoulder.

"Cheer up. Joten would be proud to know you broke through because of him," Zarasu said, comforting Ij'gne in his own way.

"I would rather not have this strength if it meant he could be brought back," Ij'gne replied.

"Don't drown in your sorrow. Joten died honorably. It was only because he delayed the invader that I managed to stop him in time. I'm sure he had no regrets, so don't wallow over it. He would be sad to see how devastating his death has been for you."

"He was all I had left," Ij'gne said, tilting his head upward. "I thought it was revenge that motivated me to push myself so hard, but now I realize it was because I wanted to be in his presence. He was always there for me, cheering me on and supporting me. Yet now that I've realized this, he's already gone. Truly, we humans don't appreciate what we have until we lose it. It's a shame, really."

Zarasu fell silent for a few moments before suddenly asking, "Do you want to take me as your father?"

"What?" Ij'gne whipped his head towards Zarasu, unable to understand why he brought up this topic.

"I know I can't replace him, but I'll try my best," Zarasu continued with a warm smile. "So please, don't dwell on the past so much. Let me be there for you as well. Ij'gne, you don't have to be alone."

"W-why?" Ij'gne choked out, wanting to cry, but shedding no tears.

"Because I've also lost someone dear to me. I know the pain you're going through, and I want to help you. Let us keep each other company, and maybe we'll find solace one day. So what do you say, son?" Zarasu reached out his hand to Ij'gne.

The canals of Ij'gne's airways constricted as his heart fluttered like a butterfly. He'd never felt so emotional before and didn't know how to respond. In a fit of panic, he fell back into his previous mindset and blurted, "Will I get strong enough to avenge him?"

Ij'gne was embarrassed by his words and was about to apologize when Zarasu said, "Yes. I'll teach you everything I know and nurture you as my successor. We need another high priest among our ranks. So please, join me."

Zarasu extended his hand further, and Ij'gne grabbed it without another moment of hesitation. Thus, Ij'gne began training under Zarasu's guidance. With Zarasu's expertise, Ij'gne made quick progress in his martial arts, reaching perfection in all his Inspirations.

Afterward, Zarasu taught him the various techniques he had created throughout his life, pushing Ij'gne's masteries to new levels. While he might not be as adept as Zarasu, he now knew enough to call himself a powerhouse. By his estimation, he was as strong as the associates who had held off the defenses.

A perfect opportunity to test his strength presented itself a week later. The scouts had found the homes of their previous attackers and reported their locations back to Zarasu. In turn, Zarasu asked if Ij'gne wanted to lead the team.

"I'll do it," Ij'gne accepted without delay. "I've been training for this moment the whole time."

Zarasu smiled fondly at him and handed Ij'gne a wooden token representing his authority. "Then go. Sever all the burdens weighing down your mind. And if you ever are unsure, ask D'wei. He's been my disciple for a long time and knows what to do."

"Thank you, Father." Ij'gne bowed and took off with a small duffle bag containing some spare rations.

Ij'gne soon met up with his team and introduced himself. The leader, who Ij'gne assumed to be D'wei, was a man in his 30s with strips of cloth wrapped tightly around his limbs. He wore a red outfit that was tight enough to hug his body, but loose enough to allow free movement. After they greeted each other, D'wei handed him similar attire and asked him to change.

"This will help you blend in when we're on the other side. We don't want to be caught before completing our revenge," D'wei explained.

Ij'gne nodded, and they soon passed through the mountain using a secret tunnel hidden by overgrown roots. The air was musky, but the team was used to such conditions. They traveled for a few days, stopping occasionally to rest, and arrived at their destination. Then they waited until night before launching their attack.

Screams pierced the silent night air as they ambushed the resting warriors. Many tried to fight back, but they were too overwhelmed to do much. The only thing they achieved was to warn their comrades of the incoming danger, but that hardly made a difference when the martial artists struck like lightning.

D'wei and Ij'gne ran ahead to confront the leaders, leaving the guards to their teammates. They might not look like it, but every person on the team was a formidable martial artist with at least three perfect Inspirations. Otherwise, they wouldn't have been selected for this covert mission behind enemy lines.

As they closed in on their targets, D'wei accelerated and suddenly appeared before one of the leaders. His leg struck upward, launching the man away before he jumped at him. D'wei threw a flurry of punches mid-air, suppressing the opponent before he could regain his bearings.

This left the other leader to Ij'gne, who struck out with vengeance. A barrage of punches was exchanged between them, with Ij'gne rapidly gaining the advantage. His training had finally paid off and granted him the power he sought.

"It's you!" his opponent suddenly cried out. "Why are you doing this? I don't want to fight you!"

"Hmph, rich coming from you. Aren't you the ones that started this conflict? Now you want to back out when you're losing? Think again! This is life, not some game!" Ij'gne angrily rebuked.

The man's eyes widened with shock before he exclaimed, "Have you lost your mind? When did we ever cross you?"

This response only angered Ij'gne further. How dare they talk as if they were the victims. Don't they realize the damage they'd inflicted, the pain they'd caused, and the lives they'd taken? Those were people with unfulfilled dreams! Families were broken apart just because of them. And now they have the audacity to play the victims? Do you know how infuriating it was for Ij'gne to hear that from the perpetrators of that tragedy?

Fueled by his rage, Ij'gne punched harder, faster, and stronger than before. He had never wanted to kill someone so badly, and his strikes showed it.

Every hit was aimed at a fatal spot, forcing the man to defend uncomfortably. His strength began to wane as Ij'gne dished out punches faster than the man could generate power to match. Eventually, after a short skirmish, Ij'gne broke through his defense and punched right through his chest.

The man tried to say something through his blood-stained teeth, but Ij'gne spared him no mercy. With a forceful tug, Ij'gne ripped the person in half, bathing himself in blood. At that moment, D'wei walked into view, holding the twisted-off head of his foe.

"You finished?" D'wei said with an appreciative look. "Then let's burn this place down like they've done to us so many times."

Ij'gne nodded, took a torch, and walked toward the village center. What better place to start the process than the heart of their tormentors?

As he approached the biggest building, a woman holding an infant ran out to stop him. "P-p-please, d-don't do this," she begged, terror creeping onto her face.

Ij'gne paused and gave her a second glance.

"Y-you're not l-like them. Please, you don't h-have to b-become a m-m-monster," she continued. As if sensing the grave atmosphere, the baby in her arms began crying, further emphasizing her vulnerability.

Ij'gne was about to ask them to step aside when D'wei suddenly appeared beside the woman and punched through both the baby and her, scattering them into mists of blood. He then pulled his arm out, sending the frail lady to the ground before turning to Ij'gne.

"Stop dallying! The other places have already sent reinforcements. We need to leave. Now!"

Ij'gne gave the dying woman one final look before tossing the torch with a heavy heart. Then he followed D'wei, leaving the enemy camp with more burdens than he initially entered with.

'Is this really the correct thing to do?' he asked himself after reaching a safe distance. 'Or have we gone too far?'