What the fuck? What the actual fuck? Where the hell am I?! Looking around, there was just… nothing. No light, no darkness. No ground, no sky, no sound other than some ringing in my ears, no air. There is well and truly nothing around me. Did that asshole decide to shoot me anyway?! It wouldn’t surprise me, but things really didn’t seem to be headed that way. But it could explain that crooked smile, he was never planning on letting me go in the first place. Why not just shoot me after I sold out my boss, though? None of this is making any sense.
Come to think of it, could I even really be dead? I’m clearly conscious on some level. I’m thinking right now, after all. Can you think if you’re dead? If you can, then this would have to be the afterlife. Based on the lack of anything around, definitely not heaven. As if I had a chance of getting to see that place, anyway. I attempt to chuckle to myself but nothing comes out. How did nothing come out? Cranking my head down, all I see is more nothing. Where is my body?! Oh god, I’m definitely dead!
This is hell, then. It could be purgatory, I guess. But not even having a body is already a nightmare. From experience, you don’t start torturing someone at the top level, you ramp it up. Oh god, you can’t die if you’re already dead. I’m actually fucked. I’m going to be tortured for all eternity. Working myself quickly into a severe panic attack at the thought of what’s to come, I started pacing around.
Wait, I’m pacing? How am I moving with no body? How do you even move through nothing?! I’m definitely feeling the sensation of movement, despite being a disembodied consciousness. If I can move, would this not be hell? Surely I’d be trapped if that were the case. This is all a little too much for me to take in right now. With so much confusion and absolutely no certainty in sight, I used the only coping mechanism currently in my arsenal and started “walking” through my new prison.
“NOT THERE.”
What the fuck?! I rapidly spun my awareness around, hoping to find the source of the booming voice. With no luck spotting the person responsible for striking me with possibly the most fear I’ve ever experienced, I tried to book it as fast I could. As soon as I felt the sensation of running away, I jolted to a stop, and was forcibly turned around. Sufficiently terrorized, I started internally begging anyone who would listen for at least the ability to cry.
“I SAID NOT THERE. THIS WAY.”
Suddenly, with barely any time to process what I just heard the voice say, I was suddenly propelled forward. It felt like I was strapped to the front of the Apollo 11 before takeoff. I really wish I could scream right about now! All things considered, this is far from the worst torture I’ve had to endure. I might even find this fun, were it not led by the single most terrifying experience of my life.
No sooner than when I started to accept my situation, did the nothing start to change. Almost imperceptible at first, the darkness began to give way to a pure white light that enveloped the entirety of my surroundings. As nice as it may be to have some form of stimulus other than a god screaming into my soul, the light growing gradually did nothing to ease the anxiety I was experiencing. Eventually, the light started to grow to a painful intensity, and it was now accompanied by an also growing hum.
As soon as I was getting to the point of being sure I would never be able to see or hear again, all the heat was sapped from my entire existence. Alongside the sudden cold, it felt like my entire being was slapped by someone hanging their hand out of a car window, and then nothing again.
This nothing doesn’t feel like the same nothing. Surely enough, the intense hum and light were still with me, but slowly fading. There was also still the feeling of movement, but much less intense. No, that’s not right. I’m not moving anymore… That’s… real wind?! A very dangerous hope started to creep into me. After hesitating for a while, I moved to slap myself in the chest. “Ow, shit!” Oh shit, that hurt! I felt that! I have a body! The hope began to feel much less dangerous as I started to register that I was seemingly actually alive.
As the humming died off, so too did the light, and I was able to take in my surroundings. Not that it was any help. If anything, all it did was bring me back to a state of confusion. Surrounding me was a seemingly quite large forest. Putting my ears to work, all I could hear were birds and some insects. No civilization nearby, then. Figures I wouldn’t be that lucky. Despite the peaceful environment, my stomach was essentially one giant knot.
“Okay, well, I’m alive, at least. I may not be near any signs of people, but I’ve been in worse situations,” I announced to myself aloud. It may be bad to be talking to myself already, but there is an immediate need for something familiar that I have to satisfy. “First things first, can’t panic. That will do nothing to help. Take stock of your surroundings and make a plan or you end up like a wannabe survivalist,” I continued, hoping to not completely freak out. It really is the worst possible thing one can do when they’re lost or stranded.
Doubling down on my self-assurances, I took a further look around. I’m in a decent sized clearing, but the forest around me is entirely untamed. Not one good line of sight anywhere through the thick spread of various ferns, bushes, and trees. The only viable landmark in any direction is a mountain to the… South? Assuming it’s morning, anyway, that would be South. Time will tell, there, just gotta wait and see if the sun is coming or going. With a heading picked, it’s time to see what I might still have with me.
Surprisingly enough, I somehow still had all the gear I brought for that job. I guess I owe Mr. Gunman some gratitude for being a professional. Didn’t even bother giving me a pat-down because, quite frankly, he definitely didn’t need to in that position. That leaves me with plenty to work with. I guess I can throw some gratitude my own way, too, for always going to work with contingencies in mind. “Hmm, maybe that’s why he caught me. Too much gear to be properly quiet? I thought I was doing well, though. Oh well, the time to reflect on that is later, I suppose.”
Pulling off my backpack to double-check its contents, I opened it up and dumped it out. Taking a look at everything, I was quite pleased with myself. “First aid kit, lockpicks, firestarter, emergency blanket, a couple changes of clothes… That’ll be extra handy, don’t want to rock all black all the time, not entirely helpful in the wilderness… backup knife, rations for a few days, whetstone, multitool, headlamp and flashlight, IR binos, trusty camping cookware, extra mag, oh shit! I forgot my phone in here, never thought I’d be happy to see that,” I exclaimed. Grabbing my phone out of the bag, I excitedly unlocked it. As quickly as I was happy, I was similarly disappointed. “Of course I wouldn’t have reception. That would just be too easy, wouldn’t it? Guess I have to figure out where I am the hard way.”
Coming to terms with the fact that I’m in for a bit of a challenge, I started to pack everything back into my bag. There may be no reception to help guide me back from wherever the hell I am, but at least I shouldn’t be in immediate danger of dying with what I’ve got with me. Once everything was back in the bag, I made sure everything else was in place on my person. “Holster, still with the accompanying pistol, good. two spare mags, emergency first aid supplies, flares… Everything seems to be in order.” With my verbal checklist complete, it was time to head off toward the mountains I spotted earlier.
As I turned to begin walking off toward my landmark, I heard a glassy grinding sound. Looking down, I was shocked to see what looked to be the crystal that I touched just before I woke up here, if not a similar one. It was hard to tell without being able to recognize anything amongst the patterns covering the strange item. “Well, I may as well take it, it could prove useful. At least if I end up finding bossman I can hand it over and hopefully not end up in too much trouble,” I commented as I slipped the pieces of gemstone into my pocket.
As I took off into the trees, I decided it may be best to keep the self-soothing chat to a minimum so I could keep an ear out for any signs of danger or people. After a good twenty minutes of walking, there didn’t seem to be any indication of a nearby threat, so I decided I could afford to relax a little. All in all, it was a beautiful day. There were birds chirping, a nice breeze, and the sun was shining overhead, unimpeded by any clouds. Wherever he dumped me, he certainly managed to keep me out for quite some time. It was definitely warmer than this at his house, I thought to myself.
Ensure your favorite authors get the support they deserve. Read this novel on the original website.
Indeed, I was quite far from where I began. After a good three hours of walking, the scenery remained largely the same. Aside from seeing the occasional new flower or rather strange tree, it felt as if I was walking in circles. With the walk dragging along, my mind began to wander. It was easy to get lost in thought, with everything that just happened. First of all, where the hell did I end up? The difference in weather is already a curveball with the shift from tropical to temperate. Second, how did he manage to put me under, and for so long? The change in time of day would indicate that I was only out for about five hours, but the different climate would hint at least three times that when traveling by plane. I’m well and truly lost.
That leaves the highly disturbing dream I had while I was out. It was so vivid, it certainly felt real. Granted, it’s not exactly something I need to solve for the sake of my survival, but that’s going to leave me unsettled for a while. Something about being somehow surrounded by nothing is completely indescribable. I honestly wouldn’t wish that feeling on my worst enemy. And that voice felt like it blasted through my very soul. The nightmares that are likely to follow are going to haunt me to the core.
“Ugh, what the fuck?” Without noticing, I apparently managed to wander into a shallow stream and soaked my boot. “Just lovely… Well, found water at least. I certainly can’t afford to be spacing out right now, though,” I mused to myself as I scanned my surroundings for any potential predators I may have missed in my daze. After a good look around, I decided the coast was clear and I was safe to settle down and rest for a moment.
First order of business, gather some dry leaves and sticks for a fire. Gangrene would be one of the worst things I could allow to happen with no way to get rescue, right now. With enough for a good start, I built my little campfire teepee and pulled my firestarter out of my bag. After a few strikes, the leaves ignited and spread their flames to the twigs. I quickly started adding bigger sticks until the fire was burning away without interference. Proud of my very minor achievement, I took off my boots and socks, and set them next to the fire to dry.
With my gear set out and drying, I cleared the ground just slightly further away and took a seat. I took off my backpack and pulled out one of my bars of survival rations, along with one of the smaller camping pots. I grabbed some water from the stream, using one of my spare shirts to cover the top and keep out any debris. I then brought the pot back and set it on top of the fire after adding some larger pieces of wood to keep it burning long enough to boil the water, and set the shirt to dry next to my boots.
Breaking into the survival rations, it was exactly as bad as I expected it to be. It was so dry that I would almost consider it to be dangerous to eat, were I to not have water boiling away at the moment. One could almost describe it as tasteless, but I would say it tasted more as if the one responsible for its production was telling a vague story about apples as it was made. A step above cardboard, but certainly not fit for a king. That being said, it’s food, and it’s specifically made so you can keep going in a survival situation, so it’s exactly what I need right now.
After I managed to choke down half the bar, I checked on the water. It was already at a rolling boil, so waited five minutes and pulled it off the fire to cool. While that happened, I checked my clothes and found them dry and very pleasantly warm. Having re-dressed and put the spare shirt and firestarter away, I checked on the temperature of the water to see how long it might have to sit. It was still quite warm, but not enough to burn me, at least too bad. And considering the colder climate, drinking some hot water may be a good idea, despite how unpleasant it may be. Anything to keep from unnecessarily burning calories to keep warm.
Gulping down a good two thirds of the water, I took a look into the sky to get an idea of how much daylight is left. The sun wasn’t even at the halfway point in the sky, plenty of time to keep moving and see how close I can get to those mountains. Using the pot, I doused the fire and kicked everything around to scatter evidence of my having been here, and then stowed it back in my bag. Judging by the sun, the mountains are, in fact, to my South at the moment.
With a solidified heading and renewed confidence, I resumed my hike. Hopefully I'll make it there while I still have light. As far as climbing it, I’m definitely holding off on that until tomorrow morning. I won’t be finding my way if I pass out on a cliff from trying too hard. Thankfully, the forest floor was surprisingly even and easy to traverse, aside from the thick plant life coating everything in sight. Even with the natural beauty of the forest, though, I couldn’t shake the feeling that I was in deeper shit than I realized.
I’ve traveled all around the world for my various assignments, so I like to think of myself as quite skilled when it comes to knowing where I am. Despite that, every time I feel like I’m getting an idea, I see something that completely melts my confidence. A stray bug that seems oddly out of place, a tree that doesn’t look quite right, as if I recognize it, but it’s more of a cousin to what I have in mind. The nagging feeling of something being wrong just would not go away no matter how far I walked. Then I saw something that made me question whether or not I even actually woke up at all. At first, I thought I caught a glimpse of a deer, but I quickly noticed that what was wrong was much more obvious with this animal.
If you saw everything aside from its head, you could be forgiven for thinking it was a regular deer. But once one saw its head, there was no calling it a regular deer. The most striking difference was the jet black, much straighter, more angular antlers. And as if that weren’t enough, its eyes were completely blank. Devoid of any discernible color other than stark white. It brought its head up from grazing amongst the leaves, and the second its gaze met my own, it felt as if I plunged myself into an icy lake. Electricity arced along my spine, and every single hair on my body stood in unison. That is not a fucking deer, I thought to myself as my body shot straight into fight or flight mode.
Before I realized what was happening, I took off at a full sprint. Everything whizzed by in a steady blur and shocks traveled through my body from my heavy footfalls on the ground as I blindly bolted through the trees, not daring to look back. Eventually, I ended up running too fast for my legs to keep up and I tripped over my own foot. Coming to a tumbling stop, I rolled behind the nearest tree I saw and hunkered down. Please, for the love of god, don’t let whatever the fuck that was see me. I have been less terrified in gunfights, for fuck’s sake!
As soon as the desperate thought crept into my mind, I felt a buzzing, and everything around me started to warp and shift, before settling into a slight mirage. WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?! I’m hallucinating on top of everything?! There’s no way I woke up. Come on, come on, just wake up and get out of here, god damnit! Spiraling into severe panic once again, I clamped my eyes shut and curled into the fetal position in the cover of the tree.
Once I managed to lower my heart rate a little bit, I forced my eyes open, and I regretted it immediately. A mere twenty feet in front of me was the “deer” staring straight at me. I froze the second I saw it, not knowing what to do. Come on, it’s got to just be a deer. Something’s just wrong with it. You have a damn gun, after all, why are you so scared?! With that thought, I snapped back to reality. Now remembering that I’m armed, I moved to draw my pistol. Once I unhooked my holster, the deer lifted its head and started to sniff around. You know, if it weren’t completely insane, I’d think you were hunting me… Chasing after me and sniffing around once you lost sight of me… Could it be rabies? Nothing I’d ever seen would hint at this being rabies, but what else could explain the disfiguration and seemingly aggressive behavior? Suddenly, the deer seemingly lost interest and bound off back in the direction I first spotted it, leaving me in an eerily quiet forest to contemplate what just happened.
Why is it so quiet right now? Has it been sick long enough to be considered predatory in its aggression? I can’t hear so much as a cricket right now, something was seriously wrong with that, I thought to myself as I slowly started to calm down further. Slowly, I started to hear the sounds of bugs and birds again, and I was able to relax again. As soon as I did so, though, the mirage started to warp and shift again, the buzzing slowly subsiding, before my vision returned to normal.
Okay, I’m clearly not waking up any time soon, I just have to hope that’s not the only thing I’m hallucinating right now. “I don’t have the energy to waste thinking about this shit,” I muttered to myself as I started trudging toward the mountain once more, this time much more tired than before the mad dash. Wiped out from running for my life, much of the walk remained a blur as all of my energy went toward staying on my feet. Finally, I emerged at the edge of the treeline at the base of the mountain, the sun having crossed the sky by quite a margin.
With maybe an hour or two left of sunlight and the mountain within reach, I decided this was as good a place as any to set up for the night. Unfortunately, I didn’t foresee a camping trip, so I didn’t bring any true camping gear. Limited on options, I grabbed both sets of spare clothes from my backpack and threw them on under my current outfit to keep warm through the night. A fire could draw unwanted attention from the wildlife, so it might get a bit cold for me, and without one, my best bet is a tree.
Keeping that in mind, I looked for a good sized tree, not too fat, but sturdy enough to climb a good two or three stories off the ground. With a good candidate picked out, I climbed up high and picked a nice, sturdy branch. Having my sleeping perch picked out, I took off my backpack and loosened the shoulder straps so that they could reach around the tree, essentially adding the tree to the bag, and buckled the front straps so I wouldn’t be at risk of falling off in my sleep.
All settled in, I took another look at my surroundings with my new raised vantage point. Aside from a clearer view of the mountain and canopy, there wasn’t much to be gathered from the view. The sunset was damn beautiful, though. I could almost swear I could see faint hints of greens and blues in the stunning display. “Huh, I suppose that can go on the ‘no time to think about that’ list, too. Not like I’d have a chance at figuring any of it out on my own, anyway. I’m no biologist or astronomer,” I mumbled to myself as I drifted off to sleep.