An intense, dazzling white accompanied by a profound headache. I could barely feel my limbs and felt as if heat and cold were both trying to assault my body. Just as I felt a cold perspiration trickling down my skin and the slimy places on it. While I could feel the pressure of perspiration on every part of my body, I had no idea where my limbs were.

It was as if I were a ghost. Yet I felt existent and... strangely serene. Despite all the pain lurking in the background of my thoughts, I felt perfectly fine. No, that wasn't true. In fact, I was delighted, almost immersed in an unspeakable, eternal bliss. If only this happiness could last forever or cease immediately.

Such was the strange contradiction to the feeling that made me so uncomfortable. I was reluctant to accept this so-called happiness. Experiencing such an emotion, such a bizarre reality, terrified me. My very Identity and Desire seemed to be threatened by this feeling I didn't dare name. Yes, that was it: I wanted to get away from this feeling that was so unfamiliar and distressing.

At that moment, I longed more than anything for the company of calm, neutrality, and Void. But unfortunately, I knew that the Void could hardly help me, that I couldn't feel its saving warmth. After all, without the Void, what was I? I was nothing. At least, that was the answer that immediately appeared to me. In any case, soon, I can get closer to the Void once and for all and begin my plan to achieve my ends.

My Ideal would finally be recognized by the World, willingly or not. Thanks to the Void, I could enjoy peace and quiet forever. Yes, soon... Soon? I stopped thinking, having a strange feeling that something was wrong. However, this feeling of remoteness from my own mind dissipated when a thought occurred to me. Thus, I forgot about this feeling of discomfort, wondering instead why my body's perceptions were so paradoxical.

In any case, I knew full well that my physical sensations made no sense. Nevertheless, at the same time, they seemed wholly right and normal. As a result, I quickly concluded that these contradictory impressions must surely be due to the drowsiness of my consciousness and/or the metallic coldness and bubbling heat I felt almost everywhere on my body.

As my perception of the environment became more precise, my pain became increasingly acute and unbearable. I had the unpleasant sensation of being pierced on all sides, that my skin was being ripped off and burned to a crisp, and that my skin had been completely ripped off in specific places on my body. So, instinctively, my vocal cords vibrated with all their might, trying to express all my suffering.

Unfortunately, no sound came out of my mouth. Instead, a viscous, acrid liquid quickly rose through my throat, irritating it as it went, and I felt it was on fire. Worst of all, after this nauseating substance had left my body, my mouth still retained the after-effects of its passage via an odor so off-putting that I felt stomach acid trying in vain to leave my body.

But that wasn't the end of my ordeal. Suddenly, I began coughing violently, while my lungs seemed to swell and contract so much that I feared they would tear. What's more, each breath became more labored as I felt something infiltrate my lungs, as if they were being pierced. From now on, I knew I wouldn't be living any longer.

This life would be over in a few minutes until a new one began. A new beginning, even if the end of this next life, would undoubtedly be both as desperate and instructive as all the previous ones. It couldn't be otherwise, after all. That was the way the Universe worked. My only regret was that in this next life, it would no longer be "Me" who would exist, assuming that "Me" ever did exist, which I increasingly doubted.

Despite this alarming news, my mouth arched in a smile of plenitude. Despite the noticeable wear and tear of the muscles that refused any command from my mind and despite the viscous paste that could be felt on lips and cheeks, the mouth wished to manifest this expression of contentment. After all, my life was not in danger of ending today. This possibility only existed in theory, but never in fact, and certainly not in Reality.

Indeed, they would never let me die. They? They need my power too much. They...? They believe they can control, or at least reproduce my unique power. They? They? What do they think? Is my power compatible with their society? Nature? Ideal? Wait... they? If only they knew my true nature. Like me, this power could never be assimilated in this World.

If only they understood the extent of their ignorance, how completely beyond them this power is, and how terrifying it is to the World itself. Who? They? After all, there's a reason why the World hates and admires me so much. Yet I can't blame them. They tried as hard as they could to escape their mad decision. They? Who is "They"?

However, in the end, their shattered Ideal mattered most, more than any security, freedom, or reason. Their Utopia, or rather, their Hell, would finally become absolute for their greatest joy or, in reality, their greatest despair. And yet, even though they knew that achieving their Ideal society would make them miserable, they couldn't help but keep aiming for this Ideal World. Of course, they are... they!

After all, they'd long since had no choice but to push their Ideal to the limit. They? Is "they" really "they"? The logic of the System and their society demanded it. So their only choice was to achieve this noxious Ideal, whatever the cost, even if it meant the end of all happiness, all future, and all hope.

In any case, I wasn't the one who would pity them for losing that unfathomably suspicious feeling everyone falsely calls happiness. Besides, this logic would lead them inexorably to desolation. However, I was sure they could find some happiness or convince themselves that there was somewhere they were going. They? Strange... They...? Although I wondered what kind of happiness they'd find at the end of this dark path.

After all, they are beings at once utterly fascinating... and profoundly boring, Just like me in the end... They? They...? They!? They are! But who was I to judge their Ideal so harshly? After all, in some ways, their Ideal was indistinguishable from mine. In the end, we weren't so different... or not. There were plenty of points on which we disagreed.

That's why our Ideals were incompatible in their very essence. Whatever their Ideal, it would be irreconcilable with mine, even if it turned out to be almost identical to my Ideal. Ideal? What is "their" Ideal? In fact, even if their Ideals were the same as mine, they'd both be in conflict. Ideal... of "They"...? Strange... They... Strange...

The very nature of my Ideal made it impossible to have any alternative to fighting and violence until I reached it and could finally enjoy eternal, unchanging tranquility. Thus, according to some of my predecessors, they would undoubtedly obtain a certain happiness, even if it was profoundly distorted compared to the desirable Ideals. They! Wait... They... But of course... They! I... They...

Of course, this happiness seemed illusory and would be so for most of my predecessors. But then, that last point didn't matter. Indeed, as all happiness is illusory, they would only change that illusion to desperately believe. They!!! I...? Who's...? In fact, I was almost jealous of their chance to admire happiness, even if I pitied them a little.

After all, their society should never have been born. Just as she should never have ended up in such a state. As helpless as me... She...? Why do I have the feeling I know who she is? In any case, if they miraculously succeeded in getting what she wanted despite herself, I would no longer exist in this World. At least for a while... They...!? Wait... Why am I talking about something I know nothing about!?

After all, my indomitable power can never be wholly revoked from this World. This was my last thought before I was seized by a feeling of vertigo. More and more, my mind told me something wasn't going according to plan. It was as if there was a slight noise that kept tormenting me. However, this thought never came to fruition.

Indeed, a distant noise caught my attention. The sound of my captors, of those who would be conducting this mad experiment. As a result, the migraine in my head gradually disappeared, and these thoughts were soon forgotten. Unfortunately, another unpleasant sensation took hold of my head. My head felt like it was being lacerated from the inside while my stomach desperately cried out for help to prevent the inevitable from happening.

To my chagrin, the foreboding sensation rose in my throat until... An acidic liquid violently erupted from my mouth, leaving behind only a strong pungency in my throat and mouth, as well as in my nostrils and on my legs. I felt soiled, even though I knew I'd been through worse humiliation. Especially as there didn't seem to be anyone in the room yet.

Had I really been through worse? Why did I feel as if I both knew and didn't know the person about to join me? An unexplained migraine suddenly returned, irradiating me with all its force before disappearing immediately as if it had never really existed. Why did part of my mind feel unreal and disconnected from the situation?

Try as I might to understand, I simply couldn't, no matter how hard I tried. The obvious seemed to elude me, but surprisingly, I felt no emotion. In fact, I couldn't stay focused on these thoughts long enough to even reason correctly. The thoughts and feelings that assailed my mind constantly diverted my attention.

They simply invited me to feel the situation without judging it. That's why I relaxed for a few moments before intoxicating myself with all the pain my body was relentlessly sending to my mind. I had indeed made the right choice. It was obvious. Contrary to my previous reflections, these thoughts and feelings were more natural and self-evident.

I let myself be overwhelmed by my body's perceptions until footsteps finally echoed in my mind. Unable to perceive the source of this distressing sound, this sensation provoked a gentle feeling of disorientation and a certain discontentment in my mind. I became so immersed in the sound that it resonated.

Of course, I understood that it had to be an illusion. It couldn't be otherwise. That's why I tried to ignore the ambient noise. However, it was challenging to do so, as the presence and resonance of the noise grew in my mind, and information from my other senses was ignored in favor of my hearing.

After all, this was quite normal since it was the only sense to inform me of events beyond the immediate vicinity. Fortunately, to my dismay, the footsteps suddenly stopped, snapping me out of my trance. But no sooner had I understood what had just happened than I heard the almost imperceptible crunch of metal rubbing against hard ground.

Suddenly, tears formed from the rims of my eyes while my instinct was to cover my ears. Unfortunately, no matter how hard I tried, I had to resign myself to the fact that I couldn't move a limb more than a few centimeters. I couldn't even stop my tears from streaming mercilessly down my face, letting my skin sensors get excited at the unwanted pressure and coolness.

A shudder then ran through my body while a slight salty taste manifested in my mouth. I couldn't even breathe as I processed these new sensations. Indeed, my mind was forced to focus on the much faster footsteps than before... and the faint sound of a heartbeat. It wasn't mine. Still, I wasn't too upset.

After all, I knew perfectly well who had come to disturb the silence of this room and who was in charge of this project. In fact, I'd never met her in person before. I'd only dealt with those underlings, who were themselves far too mighty for me. At least for the time being... Deep inside my Soul, I felt my dormant power, which was both inside and outside her, which belonged and didn't belong to her at the same time.

However, my intuition seemed confident about the identity of the person who wished to taunt me in my last moments before the final sacrifice. Much to my regret, I could not take revenge. However, this Ascendant would be the first I would kill when I could exercise my wrath. No... I suddenly changed my mind. I convinced myself that her end would be far more humiliating and horrifying than for everyone else.

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After all, the entity responsible for derailing my predecessors' plan must be the most heavily punished. Especially since, if I wanted to realize my Ideal, I had no choice but to confront them. As solid emotions flashed through my mind, my hands clenched into fists, and my eyes crinkled dangerously. But before that, I had to surpass everything in this World, even my predecessors.

My stomach clenched at the thought. After all, was I really capable of such a miracle? Would my plan work, knowing that it depended in part on luck? I sighed softly as my eyes lowered at the seemingly insurmountable task. Of course, I didn't doubt the conclusion. I simply doubted my ability to reach it. The entity would one day lose.

We simply had more stamina than they did, and We understood them infinitely more than they could ever dare to understand Us. But would it be me or my descendants who would finish them off? Sadly, the mystery remained. The only certainty was that the pain in my belly or the general tension in my body could never disappear until the day I stood face-to-face with my greatest enemy.

Unfortunately, my thoughts never continued, as I suddenly felt an enormous pressure on my stomach. After regaining awareness of my surroundings, I quickly knew what had happened: someone had walloped me. No need to say who it was, as it would only enrage me further. My eyes widened, and a sneer appeared on my mouth as a second blow hit my stomach.

This blow was so violent that blood spurted from my belly. Fortunately, the wound appeared small, given the low rate of bleeding. Nevertheless, this didn't stop my stomach from expelling its foul-smelling liquid through my mouth. Suddenly, I heard footsteps again, as if someone was moving away from me. However, the distance was short-lived; as soon as a few steps backward had been taken, they were offset by several hurried steps forward.

"Is it all right? Are you finally out of your thoughts? If you are, nod your head. If not, I'm afraid I'm going to have to manhandle your poor body some more."

As I flinched at the sudden noise that echoed with disconcerting ease through the room, far too dazzling for my eyes, she took the opportunity to move even closer to me. A shudder ran through me as I felt my enemy's breath tickle my throat horribly. It was the first time my senses had been so sensitive. I concluded that some advanced magic must have been at work, although I couldn't remember which magic it was.

To tell the truth, I couldn't remember much at all, not that I had permanent amnesia. Not yet, anyway. My mind had simply temporarily sealed off all those troublesome memories. In fact, if I tried desperately to access them, I could bring some of them back. But I didn't, for there was a reason, after all, why my mind repressed negative or neutral memories.

Not definitely amnesia? Still waiting? An inexplicable shudder ran through my mind while an unfathomable pain expressed itself in my Soul. Nevertheless, this suffocating impression of my mind could never embody itself on my body, as if it didn't exist in this World. Yet this must have been impossible, for I... Unfortunately, this thought went nowhere.

Indeed, as soon as I approached the reason for my discomfort, it was forcibly replaced by sensations from my body. And so, a blink of an eye later, the Truth escaped me again as I let myself be drawn into the flood of new thoughts. So much so that I eventually forgot I'd even had such thoughts in the first place. In any case, even my new sensations were ultimately interrupted.

Indeed, the bleeding in my belly worsened, while my throat instinctively let out a cry... or instead, attempted to. To my horror, only a viscous, iron-tasting liquid was spat from my mouth. However, a muffled sound emerged from my irritated throat after a second attempt. Finally, I took a deep breath and squinted my eyes in determination before replying with a wry smile:

"Dear Administrator, you hardly needed to come and see me just before my new departure if it was only to manhandle my body. I'm sure your dear System wouldn't like to witness such unseemly behavior on your part. Besides, had you even considered that I might end up dying of my wounds before serving as an energy source and core for your spell?"

My enemy seemed genuinely intrigued by my seemingly impossible knowledge for a second. She was either being facetious or honest. I leaned towards the latter and was relieved that her understanding of me was only partial. Of course, the other Administrators probably knew more about me.

Although I'd have to explain why they had yet to inform her of the extent of my knowledge of the World or the System. A knowledge far more vast than any Administrator, yet the most potent individuals bound by the System, could ever imagine. So, my plan seemed to have no contingencies.

"Hmm... Fascinating... Really fascinating... You know I'm an Administrator, even if you can't catch a glimpse of me and no visual detail could allow. After all, I've ensured that with spells of my design in both cases."

The Administrator paused for a long moment while I had the impression that my very Soul was being scrutinized. She was undoubtedly inspecting my Soul for secrets. It was a simple operation for an Administrator to carry out, and usually, unless the spell was performed on another Administrator, it could never fail. Nevertheless, she must already have known how special I was and... that I was in no way subservient to the System.

I was even more convinced of my assumption when I perceived her magic remaining on my Soul's surface. A caution that would generally be excessive but which, in my case, was quite normal. At least she had been informed of some of my unique features by her subordinates. Too bad... I'd hoped some of them would betray her and give her false information.

Too bad... Anyway, even if her subordinates had wanted to, they'd never have succeeded because of the restrictions imposed on their Souls by the System. Fortunately, I was more accessible than they were... even if that same freedom had brought me here, about to be used by their spell, one of the most complex ever created in this World. At least I had the chance to contemplate this marvel before my imminent death.

I had to stop my reflections when my body shuddered again at the obnoxious voice of the Administrator echoing through the room:

Besides, you know what's going to happen to you soon. How did you get all this information? Answer me! I command you! Command...?"

Although I thought she'd hit me, I only got a cool breeze. For about ten seconds, a thoughtful silence ran through the room. Fortunately, her whisper eventually echoed throughout the room:

"Hmm... No, I'm not going to question you after all. I'm sure you wouldn't answer me anyway."

The Administrator sighed before continuing in a hesitant voice, still in a whisper: "Yes, indeed, you don't seem cooperative. You'd just be playing with me, and I'd just be wasting my time. Ah, that's right! The time will soon be up...".

Suddenly, I heard the sharp sound of a slap. However, it wasn't intended for me, but for her. Then, in a voice almost inaudible and slightly tinged with anxiety, she reminded herself:

"Refocus on your personal mission. It's now or never. You have no right to make mistakes. Failure will not be tolerated. I must complete this task at all costs. The future of the World is at stake after all..."

Although genuinely disturbed by my enemy's words, I decided not to question her. My intuition told me that such rash action would only put her in unnecessary danger. In any case, I had the feeling that she would soon reveal something unheard of. Suddenly, a thought began to form in my mind... I shook my head. No, it wasn't possible... Or was it…?

The chance of this happening was astronomically low, even if it was confirmed that it hadn't happened to my predecessors for a long time. This fact alone made the possibility more credible, even if the occurrence of such an event remained astonishing. I sensed my Soul's burning as if suffering from some unknown and incurable ailment. My Soul reminded me once again that something was out of place.

But what exactly? Unfortunately, I couldn't say. My only certainty was this strange disconnect with myself and the thoughts that wanted to infiltrate my mind. On the one hand, I wanted to be carried away by the uninterrupted flow of emotions trying to get into my mind. On the other, an instinct told me to be on my guard against these intrusions.

Yet these were my own thoughts and feelings, weren't they? So, what was the harm in letting them overwhelm me? Overwhelm? The word vaguely reminded me of a feeling I seemed to have forgotten. Despite this, I was confident that I took the feeling for granted and could never live without it. I had the strange impression of experiencing an unbearable migraine via my Soul.

I knew instinctively that this uncomfortable and horrifying sensation was not due to the inspection spell the Administrator was using on me right now but to something internal and external. Something that was too much inside me and something that was missing inside me. The pain in my Soul deepened, so much so that I felt like I was being stabbed from all sides.

Yet I didn't show it on my face, even though I didn't know by what miracle I'd managed it. It was as if... Unfortunately, I couldn't finish this thought. Indeed, my Soul's scream of terror haunted my mind far too much, leaving me unable to think of anything. Finally, I gave in under the pressure of the many thoughts and sensations that wanted to reach me.

Fortunately, calm returned to my mind, so I could pay attention to the removal of my Soul's inspection spell. Suddenly, my body tingled as I felt the prodigious amount of mana in the room. But that wasn't the most shocking thing. I could again feel the mana in the air and in the spells, whereas, throughout my imprisonment, I had been unable to do so... at least until now.

Nevertheless, I was not at the end of my surprises, for soon, I had the impression that spells of unsuspected complexity had been cast in this room. What's more, I perfectly recognized the nature of these spells, or more precisely, the only way to create and use them. Indeed, unlike before, these spells were not made of mana, but of... I automatically smiled at this sweet, long-forgotten sensation as my eyes grew misty.

Who would have thought that such a being was hiding among the Administrators? Certainly not me. It would already have taken phenomenal effort and fabulous luck to hide among the Ascendants. Still, among the highest Class... With my mouth wide open, I admired her undeniable talent. Even if I had to admit to being a tad envious of the circumstances that had brought my "enemy" to this privileged position.

Such a deviation was certainly not part of the plan, but for once, I wasn't complaining. In any case, my assumption proved correct, even if I still couldn't understand her Desire to help Us. Help Us? Strange... I didn't understand... Why were such thoughts running through my mind? My Soul cried out in sadness again, though I didn't know why.

However, I didn't have time to deepen this feeling, which was becoming increasingly present in my mind. Indeed, the Administrator's footsteps echoed slowly through the room as she cast multiple spells comprehensible only to holders of fragments of the Original Soul. Fragments? Original Soul? Why did I feel I knew those two terms viscerally?

No... Why, in fact, had I not known it when I had formulated these thoughts? My Soul's agony grew more potent by the second while my mind was gripped by a terror impossible to erase. Meanwhile, my astonishment was heightened by the feel of an object in my hand. I couldn't prevent my smile from deepening as my cheeks felt warmer than usual.

But it wasn't over yet, for the tears suddenly began to flow abundantly as I felt deeply soothed. From now on, I have held all the cards to succeed in resolving this situation, which has lasted far too long. Only my apprehension about the possible inadequacy of my preparations remained a constant reminder that with one mistake, I'd never be able to honor my predecessors.

In any case, no sooner had I had the opportunity to touch the System's Jewel than she removed it from my hands. Unfortunately, I was too distracted by the sharp pain in my Soul to pay much attention. Moreover, the impression of knowing this object only reinforced the pain in my Soul and mind. Amid my unbearable suffering, I thought I could vaguely hear the words the Administrator whispered in my ear.

"If I consider the expression I saw on your face when I prevented anyone from perceiving anything abnormal in this room, am I to assume that you recognized me? Nothing more normal after all; we were once united."

She paused momentarily, with only the sound of swallowing in her throat ringing in my ears. However, after ten seconds, she continued in a much sadder and more intimate tone than before.

"Even if neither you nor I could ever remember it. Even if we wanted to, unfortunately..."

No doubt because the Administrator knew she was beginning to ramble, she cleared her throat before continuing:

"I didn't come all this way to discuss an anecdotal matter but to solve the biggest problem the World has faced since its formation. However, in this case, the World itself is the problem. But then, you probably already know that. After all, I was genuinely surprised to learn that you knew the Administrators, when you're not even awake."

Surely sensing the tenseness in my body at the mention of my peculiar condition, she tried to reassure me:

"Don't worry though. I'm not going to ask you how you came by such information. Even if I can think of only one place where you could have entered to acquire such knowledge about the current problem of the World and the functioning of the System, I am trying to understand how you could have entered. After all, its access is forbidden to those still asleep…"

I couldn't follow the Administrator's words correctly. The feeling that my mind would explode at any moment was too strong to ignore. Moreover, the sense of dissonance grew more potent by the second. Of course, I could refuse to fight all these thoughts entering my mind. I could accept them as part of me.

My Soul and mind could then return to a harmonious state. Any uncomfortable feelings could disappear for good. Only an instinct urged me to fight this intrusion. The same intuition that told me something was out of place. But what was it? I wanted to beat myself up for failing to grasp such an obvious fact.

To make matters worse, more and more thoughts were trying to get into my head. I had to resolve this malaise right away or lose! Wait a minute! Why did I assume I was going to lose? Besides, what was I going to lose? Suddenly, a deep sense of unease crept over me? I felt the ever-reassuring presence of my Soul. My Soul? Why does its presence bother me? Does its pain mean it's rejecting me?

No, that wasn't quite right. The Soul was both mine and... And? And!? And!!! I was still missing a crucial Truth to understand my mind's malaise. Just as I felt I was close to recovering the Truth, a single gesture from the Administrator gave me the last piece of information I needed.

"I still have a little time to talk to you before I leave the room and check the device one last time. I can't postpone the ritual since I'd have to report to the Chief Administrator immediately afterward, and I can't escape her omnipresent gaze for very long. Unfortunately, I'm not strong enough to stand up to the strongest of the Administrators, even with the help of... Especially as this person is..."

She cleared her throat again before continuing, "I'll tell you about it later! Let me introduce myself properly first."

Her words came to an abrupt halt. Barely a second later, a light laugh escaped her mouth as if she'd just realized the obvious.

"First, let me remove the magic that hinders your vision and movement."

As soon as she said that, I felt a weight lifted from my body. I felt freer. No, it wasn't true... It never had been... At least, not for me now... Indeed, I could never concentrate on this new sensation of freedom, for my mind cracked before I understood what it was witnessing. Colors!!! I totally understood the dissonance I'd felt until now.

My Soul screamed in pain as it was slowly consumed by the very absurdity of its existence. Yes, nothing here was real. I finally remembered where I was and what I was doing right now. I was in the strange place with its many staircases, corridors, and doors, and I must have been viewing one of my lost memories. The pain grew worse and worse. It wasn't me talking at the moment, but my version of the past!

I was contemplative and horrified by the insidious trap I had almost fallen into. What would have happened if I'd never noticed that I wasn't her? I didn't want to know. I could only thank my intuition for warning me of the problem throughout the viewing.

As much as I wanted to stay here and watch the memory unfold, which was becoming increasingly attractive, I was interrupted by an unbearable sensation of laceration in my Soul. The Souls of my past self and my present self abruptly separated. At the same time, I had the sordid impression that my mind was shattering into a thousand pieces.

The sensations of my surroundings swirled in my head as if I'd been taken over by an intense nausea while I had the excruciating impression of dying. The environment became a blur, while the Void took the opportunity to reconnect with me, instantly changing colors to shades of black and white.

My Soul gradually disappeared, returning to the state of pure illusion it was meant to be. The last image I saw was a room filled with magic tools and screens of all kinds. Strangely enough, this room reminded me of something, although I wasn't sure what exactly.

Unfortunately, I was too nauseous and my mind too fragmented to even try to make sense of it. My only desire was to sleep eternally in my Void's company. Yes, only it mattered now.

So I slowly lost consciousness, while my last perceptions consisted of the mysterious warmth of this place and an infinite kaleidoscope of corridors, staircases, and doors.

As I slowly drifted off to sleep, I addressed one last thought to the Void, which I suddenly missed more than anything else in this World:

"Never leave me again! I implore you! I'll do anything you ask. So, please... Never leave!!!"

Unfortunately, this request I had to honor in the future was one of my life's worst mistakes and joys.

From now on, we were bound by a request that we both had a vested interest in accepting.

From then on, the Void and I were closer than ever.

For better... and especially for worse.