"Shit how am I going to pay for this I can't even afford food! martin yells while looking down at the broken time-space reality traveling spaceship. martin turns around and asks to himself

"Where the hell am I?" he asks himself.

Looking around, he sees a giant tree-sized mushroom.

"Hey, I'm pretty sure there is no mushroom on earth that size, huh well, I don't go outside very often, so who am I to say"

"So how do I get back home... well, dad always said moss points to civilization," he says confidently

"or wait was it the other way around," he asks himself.

"well, just sitting here's gonna do nothing maybe I can find a nice village to help me. Yeah, maybe they'll have milk and cookies too.

Walking mindlessly threw the bushes, he finally finds a road. Along that road comes a horse carriage of high-looking status. Martin hears dozens of people chanting like a war cry.

"Ooga booga ooga booga ooga booga ooga booga!!!"

A whole bunch of half men half horse people surround the horse carriage

"what the fuck are those centaurs," He says, surprised.

"Woah, this is like one of those anime. Ok, all I have to do I go over there and save the rich people with my epic power, and then they will give me all their money," he says smugly.

"I'm a genius!" he says proudly.

Martin runs down to the hill to the invaded carriage.

"stop your rain of tyranny is over I am... uuuuuh oh, that's cool sounding I am Mojo The Neck Beard, and you pea-brained horse fucks shall bow down at my feet and beg for mercy, and I shall consider allowing your existence on this physical plain," he says like a fourteen-year-old pretending to be a demon lord.

This tale has been unlawfully obtained from Royal Road. If you discover it on Amazon, kindly report it.

without letting anyone surrender, he tries to shoot a fireball like a wizard, really feeling the power within. The centaurs look a little intimidated by his concentration,

"bbzzz" a fart noise comes out of his hand.

The centaurs just laugh and beat the shit out of the fat neckbeard.

walking alongside the centaurs, his hands are tied together by a rope, held by a centaur almost like a leash, half-starved to death.

"Fuuuck, this sucks it's not how it's supposed to work where is the big titty waifu I want to go home and go back to being a hobo again," Mojo wines.

"oogo booga bugaga!!!" a centaur yells at him, slapping him four times in the face, bruising him even more.

"Maybe a hot girl with super powers will show up and save me," he thought to himself just so he could hold on to a little hope to help him cope with the circumstances.

An old man in a hood pops out of the bushes he spreads his hands, producing light matter of some sort. He shapes the light-matter into a Curved Sword and then chops off three of the centaur's heads and blasts two with energy making their heads explode, scaring the shit out of all the others making the raiders peace out of there.

"Good thing I crossed your path, being a slave to the centaur raiders, well that is a fate much worse than death. come, I have a cabin you can rest in," he says meditatively.

As they walk up the mountain,

the old man says, "My name is Milarepa what is your name young one?"

"My name is Mojo The Neckbeard," Mojo says proudly

"so Mojo, how did you get captured by these beasts.."

"I intervened in their ambush on a passing carriage trying to save the rich people, but they kinda just beat the shit out of me and took me captive," Mojo says sadly.

"Hm, that's too bad you sound like a fine soul I can teach you the ways of the arcane if you want to grow stronger, so that doesn't happen again... if you have dedication that is," Milarepa says calmly.

"That sounds dope! Where do we start!?" Mojo says over excitedly

"Calm your self the arcane is wielded only thew the meditator," Milarepa says peacefully.

Eventually, they reach Milarepa's cabin.

Entering the cabin, Milarepa says meditatively, "please sit."

Mojo sits back on the couch. Milarepa sits on a round pillow in the crossed-legged lotus position.

"Now tell me everything you know about the magic," Milarepa asks meditatively.

Mojo says embarrassedly, "uhhh nothing..."

Milarepa looks at the neckbeard with a look of disappointment "oh... I see..."

He says, refreshed, "well, I guess we will start with the basics..."

Chapter Seven: Good News: