[WP] Write a story that ends with "And yet my desire to kill continues to grow..."
...
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Dashcam audio - Jeep Cabin
Southbound Highway, Doterra Territories
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"Joe, have you raised the banners?"
"The banners?"
"Of Course, we're on a mission for the Captain of the bloody QUEEN, Joe. We need to make sure people see that."
"Rob, just the other day you were telling me that the establishment was the enemy to the common man, now you're raising banners for one."
"Look, that was then- this is now. Besides, I've met the woman: A sharp looker and some serious smarts. I'm on board."
"Seriously?"
"Seriously."
"..."
"..."
"It's just because she knighted you for assisting in the Captain's rescue."
"You shut your wifed-up mouth, Joe, or I'll tell your fiance you were staring at that Elf's butt."
"I was not!"
"You were too!"
"I was not!"
"We all were Joe! Nothing to be ashamed of, the first step is admitting."
"If you tell Sarah, I swear to god-"
"I wont, I'm not that terrible a person. Honestly though, in a world like this, I feel like maybe you could keep your options open. You're not married yet you know."
"Rob, I told you already: I love Sarah. We're getting married. Travelling in an alternate reality isn't going to change those things one bit, alright?"
"Alright..."
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"..."
"..."
"... I know you're holding back on saying something Rob, I've known you too long-"
"Well it's just that you were really, really staring at that Elf's bu-"
"Shut the fuck up Rob."
"Grouchy, grouchy, no need to be like that. Hey, we're coming to a fork in the road. It's a right, right?"
"Right."
"Right, right?"
"It's a fucking right Rob. Take the right."
"Ah, good. It's tough, the compass doesn't work the same way. Should have figured, but the damn thing just sort of spins towards the West for some reason."
"Magic?"
"Gotta be magic."
"..."
"..."
"Everything is fucking magic here. Hell, I bet if you grew petun-yas around these parts, they'd turn out to be magic."
"It's Petunias Rob. You're saying it wrong."
"Am I really though?"
"Yes."
"Really, really? Peet-Un-as is wrong?"
"God damn it, YES. For the last freaking time: They're Petunias"
"Joe."
"Yes Rob."
"Sarah has ruined you dude. She has straight-up ruined you."
"Well she's not the one who dragged me out of my house in the middle of the night, to go driving off in a Jeep through a portal to fuck-knows-where."
"I personally like to think this is good for you. You've been getting complacent Joe, settled in the calcification of Modern-day Americana."
"Modern calcifying- what?"
"Don't you see Joe? This is the shock to your system! This is what's going to shape and build your character! On day you'll be telling your kids about this adventure! Your Grandchildren! Hell, there's magic and shit here- maybe if you forget about Sarah and hook up with some long-lived Elf or mage chick, some of that immortality could rub off and you might be telling your Great-Great-Grandchildren!"
"Rob, I can't even believe the shit that comes out of your mouth sometimes."
"I figure that you of all people might believe it-"
"I still can't, and besides: Sarah doesn't want kids."
"Wait, wait, wait. I really thought you said you two were still talking that through. Like, that was an ongoing discussion."
"Well it's not. She doesn't want them."
"Didn't you want them?"
"Doesn't matter. Sarah doesn't want kids."
"..."
"..."
"Joe, listen to me for a minute. Head in the game: Forget about Sarah."
"I can't just-"
"Joe, I'm serious. Forget about Sarah and listen to me. You can tell your hypothetical-future children all about your epic adventure: How you slayed Zombies. How you rescued townsfolk. How you saved their hypothetical-mother at the last possible second from a terrible fate, and in return she gave you here undying love and gratitude-"
"Are you trying to go Leonardo DiCaprio on me right now?"
"Saved some hot Mage chick from a foreign land, or a smoking beauty from an Elven tribe of the deep and unexplored Forests! Some Warrior Knight who you rescue at the last possible moment from certain death-"
"Holy shit. You're legit trying to use some Inception-style bullshit on me."
"No! I'm trying to save you Joe, save you from the calcified pile of lame you're going to become if you go back to that woman. I've known you a long time bud, she's going to make you take her way or the highway, every time, no middle-ground."
"... You're a real bastard sometimes Rob"
"I know buddy, you can thank me later."
"... That's not what I was planning on doing."
"Well, whatever it is- it can wait. Put one some ear-muffs and take out that ghoul up ahead will you?"
"With what?"
"I'll slow down, roll back the sunroof for you. Give it a slug."
"Fine."
"Alright, ears on! Give it a good sho-"
BAM
"WOOOOO, awesome hit Joe Good buddy! That was like a watermelon wearing a helmet! I thought you'd be more squeamish about it, but DAMN Joe! Nice shot."
"And yet my desire to kill continues to grow..."