"Ooh, this is good!" Maisie took another sip from the flagon. Monty had already drained his.
"Isn't it, though? That Tuuka knows his stuff!" Sandy replied. She was quite a bit redder in the face than usual, and getting a little unsteady. It had been her idea to tap the keg that Amelia had brought through the portal, and then to deliver a few mugs to the couple. And another for herself, of course. To be sociable.
They were in Monty's workshop, which had more room than Maisie's pottery studio next door. Amelia always loved visiting the two crafters. They had retired from office jobs years ago and made businesses out of their hobbies. They were passionate about pottery and tin smithing, and it didn't take much to get them talking about their respective specialties. Both of their workspaces were crowded with things they had made, both for sale and just for fun. Amelia particularly enjoyed the tinker's workshop, since he had lots of interesting metalworking tools.
"You should come check out the metal shop we have in the tower! And the smithy! I bet Bellows and the rest would love to talk shop. We have a whole floor for art, and Tyni's wife is a sculptor! You guys would fit right in!"
"Smithy, hmmm? I'd like to see that, lass. Dear?"
"Of course! Meeting fellow artists is always a pleasure! When can we come?"
"Why don't you come by tomorrow? Maybe lunchtime? I'll ask Tyni to make something special! You could meet everybody then."
Monty and Maisie shared a look, then both nodded. "We'll be there!" said Maisie.
"Hic!" hiccuped Sandy.
Amelia nudged the tipsy merchant and gestured towards the door. "I think maybe we should get you home. Beddy bye time!"
"'Bye! Hic! See you soon!" Sandy said with a slur, weaving towards the door. Amelia quickly wrapped an arm around her waist and helped steady the shopkeeper.
"Bye, Maisie! Bye, Monty! See you tomorrow!" She bade them as she awkwardly maneuvered Sandy out the door.
Luckily, it was only a few blocks from the crafters' place to the shop. It was just getting on towards evening, and a light fog had set in. The two took their time as they walked, although Amelia did have to shush Sandy when the latter started to sing off-key. It was a very rude song about hedgehogs and wizards.
[Warning! Intrusion attempt detected at annex entrance. Entry denied. Threat level High.]
"Uh, Sandy, I think there might be a problem at your shop! Can you lean against this wall while I go look?" she asked, propping the woman against the closest house wall.
"Thingumbob! Hum hum ha hum!" The shopkeeper sang to herself merrily, if somewhat disjointedly.
Amelia let go and watched as Sandy very very slowly sank to the ground, still humming. That would have to do.
She then dashed the last block, rounding the corner to see a crowd of more than a dozen people in front of the shop. She recognized the man she had taken to calling Mr. Unpronounceable, but not the others with him. He was dressed as impeccably as before, but the rest looked pretty rough. Several were gathered in a tight cluster, and Amelia could hear clicking sounds coming from that direction.
There was a flare as the lighter finally caught, and the flame was held to a bottle with a rag sticking out. Once lit, several others ignited their own cloth fuses from the flame. Just as Amelia realized what was going on, the missiles were hurled at the shop, fire trailing behind.
"Hey!" was all she managed to shout before the bottles smashed against the walls and windows.
[Warning! Attack on annex detected. Attack thwarted.]
Bert's words appeared in Amelia's head as she watched the shop engulfed in flames. She could feel the heat from where she stood, stunned, only a few yards away.
[Warning! Caretaker in danger. No active security elements available. Please assign active security elements.]
"What? Bert! What does that mean?"
[Unable to act outside of boundaries without assigned security elements.]
"Elements? What? I don't understand! They're burning Sandy's shop! We have to stop them! Do something!" She pleaded.
[Acknowledged. Processing.]
"Aha! Miss Amelia! Delighted to see you! I believe we have some unfinished business to discuss." The oily, smooth voice cut through the sound of the burning petrol.
"I had wondered how to tempt you from your precious hollow fortress. This little display wasn't actually for you, after all! Just to rid the world of that horrid shop and that horrid woman. Task failed successfully, as the kids say these days. Here you are, away from your protection. How splendid!"
The man doffed his homburg, bowing in an exaggerated fashion after taking a few steps towards her. He was lit by the red flames, and the flickering light made shadows dance evilly across the nearby walls and pavement.
"Have you decided to see reason, or do we need to, ahem, persuade you further?"
"What is wrong with you? No! Leave us alone!"
"I see. Obstinate. It's a simple thing. Give me the core. You can't use it. It is worthless to you. Stop wasting my time, girl! I will have that core! It is my right!"
"Hmmph. I don't like you, and you're mean! I'm going to call the constables! You ... You ... poopy-head!"
"Very well. You brought this on yourself, young lady. Remember that. Lads!" he called. "Help me detain Miss Amelia. She might try to run. Stop her if she does. No need to be ... gentle."
The group of men cackled, and she realized from their voices that they probably weren't human. The roaring flames cast devilish shadows on their faces. Then she realized those really were their faces, as they discarded their glamours of disguise. They were twisted, evil-looking figures, all of them armed with sharp and pointy weapons, which matched well with their oversized teeth and horns. They grinned at her surprised look.
[Processing complete. Resources insufficient. Requesting permission to ... outsource.]
"Yes! Bert, yes! Do whatever, use your own initiative, but quick would be good!"
[Acknowledged. Improvising.]
She backed closer to the shop, but the flames were too hot, and she had to step forward again. There was no chance of getting through the door.
"Bert? I'm afraid you're mistaken. There's no Bert here, miss. But we will do 'whatever'. It shan't, however, be quick." He flipped his hat over his hand, then settled it on his head at a rakish angle.
"Last chance. Hand the core over, and we'll be on our merry way. Consider the bonfire a token of our, ahem, esteem, and a lovely parting gift."
"Go away! I'm glad Shock peed on you! I wish Pancake had as well!"
"Quite. I tried! [Commanding Presence] [Overwhelming Persuasion]." he said.
She suddenly felt drawn to him, but only for the briefest moment.
[Security override. Passive defenses engaged. Active measures unavailable in mobile mode. Placement mode available. Select a location and establish your domain. Unleash Retribution. Notice! Foreign core link instantiated. Processing.]
Support the author by searching for the original publication of this novel.
"[Water Jet]!" Amelia responded. The man's fine silk suit sagged and darkened as it was drenched.
"How did you ...? That's impossible! No one can resist ... Not twice!" he spluttered, clearly outraged. Then his face twisted in a grin. "Fine. The fun way it is. [Paralyze]! [Inflict Pain]!"
"[Water Jet]! Bad man-thing! Bad!"
This time, however, he dodged to one side, the water missing him.
[Processing Complete. Unleashed contracted agents confirmed. Annihilation comes. Ruination comes. They bring the darkness. And ... friends.]
The last word was said with hesitation as if it was unfamiliar. But also said with immense delight.
"Huh. Mr. U, I'm not sure what Donny boy means, but he sounded truly happy for once! I think you're in trooouublle!"
"No, girl, you are the one in trouble! You'll regret defying me! [Petrify]!"
"[Water Jet]! Bad! You're a very bad man! [Water Jet]! [Water Jet!]" Amelia masterfully anticipated the man's dodges, soaking him thoroughly. All the practice with Pancake and the kids was paying off! They were way harder to hit!
"Would you STOP THAT!"
"[Water Jet]! [Water Jet]!"
"Agphphhh!" It was apparently hard to scream in anger with your mouth and nose full of water.
The fluttering of wings sounded briefly, then stopped. She felt an intense chill envelop her like she was encased in a block of ice. Scraping noises sounded nearby like claws or talons dragging along the gravel of the car park. Then there were two presences right behind her, ominous and overwhelming. She could smell their foul breath.
The gathering of monsters behind the soaked man took several steps backwards. Their weapons trembled in their grips. Several shot glances behind themselves, as if gauging the chances of escape.
"Well! You two! I see you've come to join me in my victory. Bow down before your lord. You're just in time to assist me with this pest." Mr. U said in a smug voice, his gloating only slightly marred by the water dripping from his face and clothes.
"Oho, brother! Oho! The pretty one is confused. He does not know! Oho! Oho! But we shall not bow. We have a new ruler! A kind ruler! Fed from her own hand, we were! Delicious, delicious food! Pie sandwich, her very own invention! Shared, as a friend! Tea and scones! Meat, from her own larder!" came a soft yet harsh voice from just over Amelia's left shoulder. She scrunched her nose at the waft of halitosis.
"Clothed by her own hand, my sister! Housed in her own house! Nests of our very own! Private nests! Confused, you say? He has spied on our liege. Raised forces against our liege. Attempted harm to our liege!" A deeper, raspy voice responded from near her right shoulder. Amelia was not at all inclined to look to either side of her--she was pretty sure who these nightmares were. She did start breathing through her mouth, though.
"Oho, again, my brother! You speak truth! It is well we have thrice leave to deal with the upstart. As the eldest, I claim the sacred right of 'dibs' on his delicate, delicious flesh!"
"Of course, my sister! And these things here attempted meanness to the Sandy one's nest. I'll have their spleens and tongues. For snackies!" replied the second voice.
"I see. Chosen sides, then, have you? Chosen her side? How unfortunate for you! You'll soon learn she doesn't even know what the core is, much less being able to bond with it! Wasting your time with this brat. It will be mine, as rightful heir and your proper ruler! Then you'll crawl to me and beg forgiveness." He snarled, his self-control momentarily lost. Then he took a deep breath and settled his shoulders, recentering himself. His face relaxed as he closed his eyes briefly, then put on a charming smile.
"Oho! Oho! Talks pretty. Bet he tastes pretty, too!" rumbled the first voice.
The store door creaked inwards.
"Hello, sweetling! I heard it was snack time! Luscious, juicy snack time! So kind of you to share!" CLACK! Cracked Ashlee's teeth. Her tongue dripped saliva onto the gravel. She edged towards the crowd of creatures behind Mr. U, passing right through the roaring flames as if they weren't even there. The crowd edged backwards away from her. There was a clatter as one of them dropped his weapon in fear.
The shop door didn't have time to close, as more people came out. Amelia saw the man with the foul hat, his billhook idly held in one hand, resting on his shoulder. His boots clanked on the loose stones. Several wisened old women followed, one of them with razor-sharp talons painted a lovely fuchsia, matching the parasol in her hand. There were more behind them, some struggling to fit through the human-sized door. None of them seemed bothered in the least by the greasy tongues of flame licking up from the ground.
"Alright, miss? These people bothering you? No worries, we'll see 'em off. Not 'aving it, not one bit of it, not with our Amelia!" She heard a voice say. She vaguely remembered having tea and biscuits with the voice's owner. A general murmur of agreement arose from the rest of the emerging group. They did not appear to be in a forgiving mood.
Mr. U paled, his hand trembling as he squeezed water from his sodden necktie. "Ah. Ahah. Hmmm. Interesting! So many! Well, then, must be off! Can't stand around chatting all night! Ta!" He said a muffled word and gestured quickly. His form blurred, and condensed into the shape of a magpie, before flitting off almost faster than Amelia could see.
Out of the corner of her left eye, she saw a small shape fly past after him, so rapidly it too was nothing but a tan blur. Then a velvety black darkness enveloped her sight, so deep even sound was dampened.
She heard scuffling noises, then a few muted screams that cut off abruptly. There were clacking sounds and a few dull thuds.
"Uh, hello? What's going on?" She called, her voice strangely muffled by the dark.
She quickly blinked her eyes several times, then focused them intently. Suddenly she could see through the darkness, but everything was dim and in shades of grey, like the color had been leached out of everything.
She saw dark forms heading back in through the doorway and heard the door close gently. In front of the shop was a figure, tall but hunched over, and wide as two men side by side. It was mostly a darker blob in the murk, no matter how she focused, but she could just glimpse a thin streak of green from left shoulder to right hip, with hints of silver glinting on the border of the color. The figure reached down and lifted a still form from the ground, adding it to the pile of bodies it had under its arm. Bodies and parts of bodies.
"Snackies! Shan't eat 'em all. Shall share!" Crooned the happy voice from the hulking figure, before it too vanished in a blur. The color returned to the world as the unnatural darkness dissipated as suddenly as it had come. The collected ruffians that had been with Mr. U were gone.
Amelia caught her breath, as warmth and normality returned.
Then she remembered the raging fire engulfing her friend's store.
"[Water Jet]!" She yelled, hosing down the flames. The burning petrol didn't extinguish, unfortunately, and was instead spread further along the wall.
"[Water Jet]! [Water Jet]! [Water Jet]!" She tried again and again, further spreading the flames. Eventually, they went out, but only because the fuel had finally been consumed.
Amelia gasped for breath, then went to survey the damage. There was none. Not even soot stains. Just the glitter of broken glass from the bottles littering the gravel of the car park.
"Hic! Howsa bout anudder pint, deary? Hum ta da tum tum, tadda boop!" mumbled Sandy as the shopkeeper staggered around the corner of the shop, supporting herself by leaning on the wall. "Wha's tha smell? Bonfire, innit?"
----------------------------------------
Amelia wrestled Sandy into a chair in her back room, the shopkeeper already snoring loudly. There wasn't any damage to the shop, and after a quick sweep out front, there would be no evidence of what had just happened.
The portal on the wall opened, and the clip-clop of Pancake's hooves sounded on the floor.
"Hey there, sweet cheeks! What's the ruckus?" The goat sniffed the air for a moment, then clopped to the front of the shop. She heard the door open and close, then moments later, open and close again. The goat trotted back in.
"Oooh, somebody done a naughty out there! Nobody invites the goat, it's unfair! Curse the luck! Curse the adorableness!"
"Yeah, that poo poo head tried to burn down the store and was being rotten again. He wants Donald, I think."
"Hah! I'll bet he does, I'll be he does!"
"I doused him with water jet, like you taught us! He hated it! I think I ruined his suit!"
"Oooh, girl! Played rough now, did you? That's my gal!"
Amelia frowned for a minute and looked over at the snoozing merchant.
"Um, I think Beige and Blue might actually be horrible monsters. They saved me, though. Them and several of the other people from the hollow."
"Who, those two? Nah, they ain't horrible monsters. I'd say more like calamitous terrors, sort of thing. Yeah, that's the ticket. 'Not to be trifled with', know what I mean? 'That what man was not meant to know', right? Horrible monsters is waaaay underselling those kids." The goat snickered at the thought. "I mean, your bog-standard horrible monster, right, wouldn't last three seconds with that crowd! They fit in well with the rest of your place, though."
"What? What do you mean? The hollow? It's a nice place!"
"Oh come off it, honeybuns! 'Hive of scum and villainy' doesn't do it justice. I've seen smaller collections of awful back in the day, when you got proper wars between light and dark." He settled down on his haunches and looked up at her. "I mean hags, not hag, but plural hags? You got a proper infestation of those things. Gaunts, every flavor of shadow and several kinds of ettins. Red caps, nuckelavee--name your boggart, all colors and sizes available, no waiting. I could go on. It's like someone picked up the mythological bestiary, right, thumbed to the 'ghastly' section, and said 'Now then! I'll have half a dozen each, plus extra for spares.'"
"Hey now, come on! They're good people! You just have to get to know them! Sure some of them look a little shady, but they have good hearts! And Shocky-wocky wouldn't hurt a fly! She's a good girl! And what about Tyni and Tuuka? Picker? Their families?"
"I'm sure some of 'em do have good hearts. And livers and kidneys too. Somebody else's, mind you if you catch my meaning. But goblins and dweorgar? Ever wonder why they got driven out and reduced to itinerant mining? Why they were so desperate for work? Hmmm?"
"I just figured times were tough. That happens! Good people have hard times too! Besides, if this place is so bad, what does that make you? And what about Fern? Whisper?"
"Me? Just a normal, ordinary goat, sister. Monsterously adorable, though, that's my secret power. But okay, yeah, Fern I'll spot you. She's a doll, not sure how she got mixed up in all this. Cute as a button, wouldn't get between her and a lollipop, though, know what I'm sayin'? Whisper, though?" He whistled. "Above my paygrade, that. I'll leave it at this. Who did you first meet here? Who broke the ice, convinced the rest to check you out? Recommended you to ol' 'Donny Boy'? Hmmm?"
"Whisper? Recommended me for what? I'm so confused!"
"You'll figure it out eventually, sweetheart. Probably. Mebbe with a little help. Don't worry, girly girl. You got it where it counts, and done right by us. 'S why we love ya, kid!"